Night had fallen.
Lu Jiaxue was handling affairs in his study, with Ye Yan and others standing before him. The Marquis’s temper had been quite good since his recent marriage, but now it seemed worse than before. The men spoke cautiously, afraid to raise their voices.
Outside the study, the atmosphere was solemn. Someone approached hurriedly.
She hadn’t even put on her cloak’s hood, accompanied only by two rough servant girls. Though thinner now, her former grace remained undiminished. With her hair in a cloud-like bun, she exuded an air of nobility. As the guards tried to stop her, Xie Min coldly commanded, “Tell him to come out and see me!”
Hearing the commotion outside, Lu Jiaxue grew impatient. The guards dared not let Xie Min in, but she was insistent, leading to a standoff. He set down the map he was examining.
Seeing Lu Jiaxue finally emerge, the guards lowered their heads, not daring to speak.
Lu Jiaxue approached Xie Min with his hands behind his back, smiling, “Sister-in-law, I’ve shown you respect, but that doesn’t mean you can cause trouble as you please.”
Xie Min stared at him coldly, asking, “You’ve brought her back, haven’t you?”
Lu Jiaxue remained silent.
Xie Min continued, “Was she the one you married last time?”
“There’s no need for you to inquire,” Lu Jiaxue motioned to someone nearby. “Escort the lady back home.”
“Lu Jiaxue!” Xie Min pointed at him accusingly. “Someone like you doesn’t understand love! All you know is how to take it by force! Does she even like you now? Why can’t you let her live in peace? She’s already risked her life playing games with you people. Isn’t that enough?”
She harbored an urgent desire for at least someone to be truly happy in this situation. She hoped it could be so.
Lu Jiaxue remained silent, perhaps stung by her words. He repeated, “Take her back.”
Then he turned to go back inside.
Xie Min called after him, “Lu Jiaxue! Someone like you doesn’t deserve to be loved. What good are all your possessions if she doesn’t like you…”
Lu Jiaxue paused. Suddenly, he laughed coldly and turned back, fixing Xie Min with an icy stare as he approached step by step. “You think you deserve to be loved? You’re so foolish, without an ounce of self-awareness. Xie Min, after a lifetime, you still don’t know who your husband is?”
Xie Min looked at him stubbornly and coldly, her tone contemptuous. “Jia Ran and I share a deep marital bond… How could someone like you understand!”
Lu Jiaxue seemed to find her particularly pitiful. “He once had an affair with your second sister-in-law. I’m sure you didn’t know that.”
“One New Year’s Eve when he didn’t come home, he was wearing a perfume sachet embroidered with the character ‘Wan’ given by another woman. Do you remember?” Lu Jiaxue leaned in close to whisper, “That was the childhood name of the Crown Prince’s consort. While your husband was advising the Crown Prince, he was also involved with his wife… The Empress herself told me this.”
Xie Min took half a step back, looking at him strangely.
“He often met secretly with your second sister-in-law in the bamboo grove. One year when the old madam wanted to cut down that grove, your husband was the first to object. Surely you remember that, sister-in-law.”
“You know I have no reason to lie to you,” Lu Jiaxue adjusted his cuffs and continued, “Your second sister-in-law truly had deep feelings for your husband. Now think about how she died, right after your husband’s death. Doesn’t that strike you as odd?”
Xie Min’s thoughts were in chaos. Indeed, Lu Jiaxue had no reason to lie to her.
She had seen that perfume sachet, but trusting in Lu Jia Ran’s character, she naturally hadn’t questioned it. Regarding the bamboo grove issue, Lu Jia Ran’s attitude was strange. Thinking carefully, there were many odd occurrences, but no one would have suspected anything untoward from such a gentle and refined man. He had always been especially good to her; even his concubines were forced upon him by the previous Marchioness.
When Lu Jia Ran died, the former Marchioness met with misfortune, and the second sister-in-law wept bitterly at her funeral. Later, she fell ill but refused to take medicine and died.
“I don’t believe it… How could I be so easily swayed by you? Jia Ran and I trust each other completely,” Xie Min said.
Lu Jiaxue didn’t want to waste more words with her. He had many important matters to attend to.
Seeing that her persuasion was futile, Xie Min had her maids help her leave. As she gradually left Lu Jiaxue’s courtyard, she suddenly stumbled, almost losing her balance. Her hands were nearly shaking.
“My lady, be careful of the stone path,” a maid quickly steadied her.
Xie Min closed her eyes, recalling many past events. She said, “I don’t believe him. How could I believe him…”
“What’s wrong, my lady? Let’s hurry back, it’s quite cold out here…” the maid asked, puzzled.
Xie Min nodded, “Let’s go, let’s hurry back.” She wouldn’t believe it. She wouldn’t remember a single word of what she heard today. Xie Min walked faster and faster, her silhouette suddenly seeming hunched.
Cheng Lang also returned to his residence late at night.
He had made a late-night visit to the Luo family but waited at the gate for a while without seeing Luo Shen Yuan return. With the incidents involving Xu Wei and Yang Ling today, Luo Shen Yuan was probably busy.
Cheng Lang decided to let the matter drop. He didn’t need to inform anyone.
He suddenly became very indifferent. What did it matter to him if things went well for others? He couldn’t be bothered anymore.
Xie Yun rarely waited for him to return home. She knew he had been away on official business in Datong for over a month and had been missing him since he left. When she heard that the fourth young master Cheng was returning today, Xie Yun began to look forward to it. She had the servants clean the courtyard, changed into a new outfit, and even spent a long time in front of the mirror checking her makeup for any flaws.
When he returned, Xie Yun went to greet him. “I heard you were supposed to arrive this afternoon. Why are you back so late?”
Xie Yun didn’t even realize that her tone carried a hint of trying to please him.
Cheng Lang glanced at her, his expression lacking its usual gentle charm. He now looked cold and indifferent.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, handing his belt to a maid.
Xie Yun bit her lip slightly. “You didn’t come back, and I was bored at home. Apart from quarreling with my sister-in-law, there wasn’t much else to do…”
“Oh, I heard that something happened to Luo San Tai Tai, Wei Yining,” Xie Yun added. “They said she fell seriously ill. When my aunt took us to visit her, the Luo family refused to let anyone see her. Everyone who went to visit was turned away like this. Even the English Duke’s mansion didn’t send anyone to check on her… We all secretly guessed that something must have happened to Wei Yining, and she might have already passed away.”
The social circle in the capital was too wide. Luo Shen Yuan probably wanted to protect Luo Yining’s position as the main wife, but such things couldn’t be kept secret for long.
Hearing this, Cheng Lang sneered, “If Wei Yining were dead, shouldn’t you be happy?”
Cheng Lang had never spoken to her like this before. Xie Yun looked at Cheng Lang’s expression, feeling that he had seen through something.
Yes, she did have feelings for Luo Shen Yuan. But in the past month, the person she thought about most was Cheng Lang. How ridiculous—when she was supposed to marry Cheng Lang years ago, she had been utterly unwilling.
“What do you mean by that?” Xie Yun bit her lip and said, “I’ve been looking forward to your return, and you…”
Cheng Lang chuckled softly. “You’ve been looking forward to my return?”
This was interesting.
He took Xie Yun’s hand and leaned in to ask slowly, “Come, tell me how you’ve been looking forward to it?”
In the golden-curtained bedroom, a maid quietly took away the candle holder. Cheng Lang pressed against her, placing her hand on his chest. Xie Yun turned her head away, her cheeks flushed red. Following his movements, she wrapped her arms around his neck. Finally, Cheng Lang stopped, resting his head on Xie Yun’s shoulder, gently stroking her long hair as he asked, “Do you like me?”
“You’re my husband. Of course, I like you,” Xie Yun replied.
“Many people like me,” Cheng Lang asked, “Aren’t you afraid?”
Xie Yun shifted slightly. “I know you once kept a mistress at Qinghu Bridge… I know you have many female companions. But I know you’ve never been truly sincere with any of them…” Although Cheng Lang was a playboy known for his romantic liaisons, she felt that at least he treated her somewhat differently from the others.
“Alright,” Cheng Lang replied briefly, slowly releasing her.
A servant brought in hot water for washing. Xie Yun got out of bed to bathe, and when she returned, she saw that he had already fallen asleep. She sat beside him, gazing at his sleeping face for a long time.
When Luo Yining woke up the next day, the snow had cleared and the sky was bright. The weather was nice, a bit warmer than the past few days.
She got dressed and stepped down from the carved bed to walk around. Lu Jiaxue probably hadn’t returned last night. She hadn’t been able to move much these days, so she needed to walk a bit. Since learning about her pregnancy, she has become much more cautious about her health. After walking two laps around the room, maids entered in succession with breakfast, setting down a pot of goat’s milk, a plate of pastries, a dish of sliced venison, and a plate of rice cakes.
Yining ate some rice cakes and drank two bowls of goat’s milk. A maid came in and curtsied, saying, “My lady, the Marquis is waiting for you outside.”
What did he want now? Why didn’t he just come in?
Luo Yining finished her last sip of goat’s milk and stepped out of the room. Lu Jiaxue stood on the snow-swept bluestone path, wearing a dark right-lapelled robe with an ink jade pendant at his waist, waiting for her with his hands behind his back.
Hearing movement, Lu Jiaxue turned and said to her, “Yining, come here.”
He took her hand as they walked along the cleared stone path. Yining looked at his back.
Many years ago, when they were both young, she didn’t know her way around the Marquis’s residence. He had held her hand, leading her to pay respects to the Marchioness. Although Lu Jiaxue liked to tease and joke with her, at times like this he stayed close by her side, afraid that others in the Lu family might bully her. So she liked all of his teasing because she knew she was under his protection.
He was the only one she could rely on in her husband’s family. For a woman, it was terrifying if even her husband couldn’t be depended upon.
Lu Jiaxue stopped.
He had indeed brought her to the main quarters where the former Marchioness used to live!
Luo Yining slowly walked over. The place was now dilapidated. The former grandeur and extravagance, the lively people and events, were now just peeling door paint and faded plaques. Moss sprouted from between the bluestone slabs, and snow piled up on the paths. She still remembered when everyone came to pay respects – Xie Min’s slightly raised fingers as she served tea, the third sister-in-law’s upturned eyes as she spoke, with a hint of challenge. The Marchioness liked to use top-grade old sandalwood incense. Every morning, the room was filled with this faint, elegant fragrance. Her expression was always calm.
“Do you remember your first time coming to pay respects? You were so nervous you almost knocked over the Marchioness’s incense burner…” Lu Jiaxue said. “I caught it from behind, and my hand got two blisters from the hot incense. You applied ointment for me later, feeling guilty the whole time.”
Of course, Luo Yining remembered. Then he had said very solemnly: “Since you feel bad about it, remember that you owe me. You must repay me in the future.”
She had been caught between laughter and tears at the time.
“It’s time for you to repay me now,” Lu Jiaxue said. “Yining, stop being stubborn. You should come back.”
Stop being stubborn, come back.
Luo Yining walked to his side. Looking at the door frame, she couldn’t help but feel moved: “Lu Jiaxue, but all of this is in the past…”
“Then what did I do wrong!” He suddenly gripped her arm tightly, saying harshly, “What did I do? Luo Yining!” Each word was forced out, his grip on her hand so tight it might break. Luo Yining could see the bottomless pain in his eyes.
Luo Yining began to tremble, her hand unable to grip tightly: “I’m sorry, Lu Jiaxue. I wronged you… If you’re willing, I can do anything. Just let go of all this. You’re Lu Jiaxue now! You’re the Governor, you don’t need to be like this. You deserve all the good things.”
Lu Jiaxue’s grip tightened even more as he said softly: “Yining, I don’t want to hear this!”
Luo Yining suddenly crouched down, shaking and barely able to breathe. Lu Jiaxue also crouched down, placing his hand on her shoulder: “Are you crying?”
Only then did Luo Yining give in to tears, sobbing loudly. It was as if she was crying out all the pain of these years.
“Yining, please come back,” Lu Jiaxue said finally.
Luo Yining quickly wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, shaking her head mutely: “I like him, Lu Jiaxue. I’ve never met anyone so good to me, never met anyone I could trust completely… He’s different from you.”
These memories made her see things more clearly. Although she felt some guilt towards Lu Jiaxue, her reliance on Luo Shen Yuan would never change.
“How is he different?” Lu Jiaxue said coolly. “Is he a bit kinder?”
Luo Yining raised her head to argue but suddenly felt dizzy as she stood up. She stared at Lu Jiaxue with wide eyes: “You still…”
She was nearly exploding with anger! These were all such underhanded tactics!
Lu Jiaxue caught her limp body, clicking his tongue softly. If this couldn’t move her, he’d just have to revert to his scoundrel nature and take her away directly. There would be opportunities to make her compromise in the future. Just that little brat in her belly was an eyesore, but forcing a miscarriage would be too cruel… She probably couldn’t bear it either. Fine, let her give birth first and deal with it later.
The carriage prepared by the Lu family was brought out, and Lu Jiaxue carried her into it. As they left, he lifted the curtain to instruct: “If there’s any unusual movement in the capital, send word. Keep a close eye on Luo Shen Yuan. With the Imperial Guard now under his control, his power is much greater than before.”
Ye Yan acknowledged the order and saw the Governor off.
After leaving the capital, the carriage switched to water transport, boarding a boat heading south.
Luo Shen Yuan stood outside the Governor’s mansion in Datong. Several rounds of search parties had already returned.
Nothing. There was nothing left in Datong.
When he received the final scout’s report, Luo Shen Yuan punched a tree trunk. The frozen, blackened trunk shook, snow falling in a flurry. He panted for a long time.
Luo Shen Yuan took one last look at Datong City before boarding his carriage to leave. If she wasn’t here, where was she?
Where could she possibly be?
Why couldn’t he find her despite exhausting every method?
After boarding the carriage, he tiredly watched the setting sun over the snowy wilderness shine in. Because of his loss, he felt a black, space in his heart that couldn’t be filled, growing ever larger.
He couldn’t handle Yang Ling’s funeral affairs or stay too close to the Qing Liu Party, only able to have others take care of it on his behalf. He knew Yang Ling’s wife had fainted crying before his spirit tablet, knew the court was in an uproar, the officials enraged. Yang Ling’s death had indeed provoked everyone – what was there to fear? At worst, they’d risk their positions and lives to bring down that old villain! As inheritors of Confucian learning, they’d rather have unyielding integrity than these positions. At least they wouldn’t be ashamed to face their ancestors after death. There had never been so many memorials submitted for remonstration, one after another willing to die for their cause. The Emperor had no choice; he could beat one, but not all. How could the court function without officials?
Some remonstrated against him too, with insults he’d never heard before. Of course, most were against Wang Yuan, but Wang Yuan suppressed those himself. Luo Shen Yuan had helped him considerably, personally dealing with several members of the Qing Liu Party. Wang Yuan trusted him even more now.
He couldn’t waste too much time; he had to return to the capital. Otherwise, the situation was so precarious it could change completely in just a few days. After all, these remonstrations to the death had affected the Emperor.
Luo Shen Yuan knew clearly that he couldn’t afford to waste time.
Traveling through the night, he reached the outskirts of the capital by noon the next day.
There was no brazier in the carriage, making it very cold. Luo Shen Yuan closed his eyes, remembering when he was very young. One winter when they were short on coal, the old nanny took him to Madam Luo. His two or three-year-old sister sat behind a small table, drinking goat’s milk from her tiny bowl. She was practically licking it, her little face covered in milk. Upon seeing him, her chubby arms immediately circled her small bowl protectively.
His sister was extraordinarily delicate and beautiful, the prettiest baby he had ever seen. Yet she pushed away Madam Luo’s hand, saying: “I don’t like him, Grandmother. I don’t like him, make him go away!”
He stood silently, not knowing why she didn’t like him. He actually… thought his sister was very cute. He felt a bit embarrassed but became even more aloof.
Later, as this sister grew up, she often bullied him. He only endured it; trying to please her was useless. Eventually, he truly had thoughts of killing her.
But later, she ate the cloud cake he bought. He had thought she would throw it out the window after he left.
That little pink dumpling of a child started to toddle around in front of him. Laughably, she even began trying to please him.
Luo Shen Yuan started to truly interact with this little dumpling, to understand her. The day she recognized his handwriting, he had a strange feeling. Perhaps it was finally being valued by someone. That dumpling gradually grew into little Yining, hanging on his arm, searching his person for gifts. He indulged her, actually smiling inside.
He was willing to indulge her, even fearing she might stop doing so. Afraid she might grow distant from him.
This love was a bit humble.
She became his wife, all the gentle moments in his life centered around her. She would sit on the arhat bed reading, one shoe and sock carelessly tossed aside. She would sleep in his arms, curling into his embrace or mumbling a few words. He could gaze down at her for a long time, unwilling to sleep even until midnight. Perhaps he had schemed and calculated to win her, but he absolutely couldn’t let anyone else take her away.
He couldn’t lose her. She was too important; he couldn’t bear to lose her.
If he couldn’t find her, he’d have to scheme against Lu Jiaxue. He wasn’t the same Luo Shen Yuan as before.
Luo Shen Yuan looked at the distant manor’s plaque and stepped down from the carriage. Yang Ling’s wife, Shen Xuan Rong, stood at the gate. Her carriage was parked to the side, and she wore deep mourning clothes.
Luo Shen Yuan knew some censors had been camping at his house lately, waiting to berate him. He had Shen Xuan Rong come inside with him. The gate closed behind them. Shen Xuan Rong sat down in the main hall and took out a small box from her cloak: “He left this… for you. I’ve brought it to give you.”
Her expression was indifferent; she had already passed through the most heartbroken and desperate times.
Luo Shen Yuan accepted it. After a pause, he said: “What are your plans for the future, madam? With Lord Yang gone…”
“I’ll just stay there,” Shen Xuan Rong said, then smiled slightly. “I’ll wait for him to return. If he wants to come back and look around, there should be someone at home…”
Luo Shen Yuan fell silent. Shen Xuan Rong’s eyes reddened again: “They say you’re not a good person, and told me not to come see you.”
“Indeed, I’m not,” Luo Shen Yuan said. He didn’t want to explain.
Shen Xuan Rong looked at him, perhaps recalling Yang Ling’s feelings towards him in the past. Tears fell as she said: “Lord Luo, take care of yourself.”
She left the Luo residence. Luo Shen Yuan slowly caressed the small box, opening it to see some secret letters before closing it again. Looking at the sun outside, he recalled her directing the arrangement of grape vines in the courtyard as he leaned back in his chair.