HomeDelicacy of the FlowersChapter 251: Regret

Chapter 251: Regret

Yu Tang’s words left Pei Yan somewhat flustered.

Indeed! It was so late—what was he doing here? Even if he was concerned about her illness, he was neither a physician who could treat her nor a family member who could comfort her… If he wanted to know how she was doing, he could simply send someone to ask. Moreover, Qing Yuan and A’Ming, who served him, were staying by her side—anything he wanted to know, he could find out…

Pei Yan suddenly felt a bit of regret about this decision.

However, the regret was fleeting.

In the education he had received, no matter what the matter, one should be cautious before acting, but after acting, regardless of the outcome, one should not regret it. Rather than wasting time on regret, it would be better to think about how to handle the aftermath, how to steer things in the direction he hoped for.

Thus Pei Yan merely coughed lightly and cast this feeling aside, saying: “What you told me this morning in the meditation room, I’ve thought about it at length and still find it rather incredible, so I thought I should come find you to discuss this matter.”

As soon as the words left his mouth, Pei Yan regretted it again.

His original intention was to come check on her illness—why didn’t he say so directly? Why find such an excuse? One must know that lies are like snowballs—to keep people from seeing through them, one lie must follow another.

Pei Yan’s pride would not allow him to become such a person.

Without waiting for Yu Tang to speak, he hurriedly added: “It’s not that I doubt what you said is wrong, I just find it strange and want to know what else happened in your dream…”

Before he could finish speaking, he firmly closed his mouth.

If not for fear of impropriety, he very much wanted to close his eyes and rub his temples.

He had just cautioned himself in his heart not to lie anymore, yet not only had he failed to stop, he had made it sound increasingly convincing, using his own actions to prove the theory that lies are like snowballs.

Seeing his cold, stern expression and serious demeanor, Yu Tang didn’t think much of it—anyone encountering such matters would feel uneasy. That Pei Yan could discuss this with her calmly and think carefully about it already made her feel he was magnanimous and broad-minded. She felt that her previous views of Pei Yan had been colored by her own position and were quite petty.

She quickly said: “I don’t remember much after waking up either. Whatever you want to know, while I still have some impression, I’ll try my best to recall.”

These were not words of evasion.

Firstly, because of her rebirth, this life had already changed greatly from her previous life. Secondly, her perspective in her previous life had been very limited, and what she knew was also limited—she feared misleading Pei Yan.

She could only tell Pei Yan the things she was very certain about.

Pei Yan had improvised this excuse—how could he think of what to ask on the spot?

He couldn’t help but furrow his brow.

Yu Tang immediately sat up straight, waiting for him to ask questions.

Pei Yan watched with the corners of his mouth twitching slightly.

The person who used to dare say anything and do anything in front of him had suddenly become so obedient and well-behaved—he had to say, it was quite interesting.

A trace of amusement appeared in Pei Yan’s eyes, sweeping away his earlier dejection. He pondered whether continuing this topic would make Yu Tang think he didn’t believe her. But if he didn’t continue this topic, how would he explain why he had come running here so late…

Just as he was caught in a dilemma, Chen Shi came in carrying a copper kettle of hot water to refill Pei Yan’s tea. She said gratefully: “If not for you today, our A’Tang might have lost her very life. Our family will never forget your great kindness.”

“Madam Yu need not be so polite,” Pei Yan replied, glancing at Yu Tang while thinking to himself: So Miss Yu’s given name is A’Tang. I just don’t know if it’s the character for sugar or the character for crabapple. If it’s the character for sugar, one could call her “Yiran,” which has both the meaning of sweetness and leisure. If it’s the character for crabapple, since crabapple is called the peony among trees, and the peony is king among flowers, one could choose “Yajun” as a courtesy name. However, neither Yiran nor Yajun quite fits the young lady’s temperament. Perhaps “Xiangyu”? Wild crabapples bloom and scatter their fragrant jade… a bit vulgar…

His mind wandered as he particularly wanted to ask Yu Tang which character her given name actually used.

But looking at Chen Shi’s manner, she might not necessarily tell him.

He suddenly felt Chen Shi’s presence here was somewhat obstructive.

After a brief silence, before Chen Shi could ask what he had come for, Pei Yan took the initiative, saying to her: “I have some urgent matters to ask Miss Yu. Could you help us dismiss those serving in the room?”

This meant for them to withdraw.

If it were any other man, Chen Shi would definitely feel this was improper, but the one saying this was Pei Yan, the head of the Pei clan, Lin’an’s most prominent family. If he had any ulterior motives, he wouldn’t need to beat around the bush. Chen Shi naturally wouldn’t be suspicious. She even thought perhaps something had happened on the Pei family’s side, and Pei Yan was avoiding others to ask Yu Tang about it.

Whatever the reason, Chen Shi felt she couldn’t refuse.

She smiled in agreement, took all the servants out of the room, and even helped close the door for them.

Yu Tang also felt it was best that Chen Shi not know about her “dream.”

She saw nothing wrong with this arrangement.

She summoned her full attention, gazing at Pei Yan with bright eyes, as if returning to childhood when her father would randomly quiz her on her studies.

Pei Yan felt inexplicably uncomfortable.

He drank some tea and found something to ask Yu Tang: “Did you dream about what happened to our family later?”

Yu Tang thought of how people outside were spreading rumors that Pei Yan had stepped over his own nephew to become clan head.

The Pei family internally certainly wasn’t a unified bloc either.

If she could help Pei Yan win over some people in advance, he would surely suffer less and progress more smoothly.

She said: “I remember that in three more years, the Young Master and someone named Pei Chan both passed the imperial examination. The Young Master’s ranking seemed slightly higher, while Pei Chan’s was slightly lower. So the Young Master gained renown while Pei Chan remained ordinary. But everyone said Pei Chan was a ‘capable official’…”

With so many officials at court, to be called a “capable official” meant one was exceptionally competent.

Additions to the Pei family were always celebrated grandly.

But in Yu Tang’s memory, it wasn’t until Pei Chan passed the imperial examination that his reputation spread.

By saying this, she hoped Pei Yan could form a good connection with Pei Chan before he became prominent.

Just as when she revealed she knew the Pei family was planning to buy estates in Jiangxi, when Pei Chan’s name came from Yu Tang’s mouth, it gave Pei Yan quite a shock.

This forced him to face reality—he couldn’t even deceive himself by saying Yu Tang had merely had a dream.

This was truly troublesome.

Pei Yan somewhat helplessly touched his nose.

Yu Tang sensed Pei Yan’s emotion and could only say in a low voice: “Everything I’m saying is true!”

Pei Yan certainly believed her, but he currently had no way to verify that what she said would definitely happen.

He shouldn’t have brought up this topic.

In less than a quarter-hour of sitting down, Pei Yan felt regret for the third time.

This wouldn’t do.

He was acting completely nonsensical in front of Miss Yu.

Pei Yan took a deep breath, stood up, and walked to the window lattice to push open the window.

The sky had completely darkened. The large red lanterns under the eaves cast their light on the blue stone pavement, staining it a faint red.

Facing the night breeze that carried a hint of warmth against his face, Pei Yan exhaled, as if this could expel all those unreliable thoughts from his heart.

He quickly reorganized his thoughts. Turning to lean against the window lattice, he said to Yu Tang: “I’ve been too demanding. Dreams are inherently fragmentary—asking you to tell me what will happen to the Pei family is indeed making things too difficult for you.”

Not difficult at all!

Yu Tang very much wanted to answer Pei Yan this way, but she truly didn’t dare say much more.

She could only smile at Pei Yan.

Pei Yan took this opportunity to change the subject, bringing everything back on track: “How is your health? Is Qing Yuan doing well here? What have you been doing to pass the time in your room?”

Yu Tang didn’t understand why Pei Yan had stopped asking about her dream, but this also relieved her considerably. Smiling, she followed his lead: “I feel perfectly fine now. Thanks to you, Miss Qing Yuan and A’Ming are both very attentive—much better than our Shuang Tao. As for being in the room, everyone has come to visit me, with people coming and going constantly. It’s been very lively—in the blink of an eye it’s already evening. How could I need to pass the time?”

Pei Yan felt this wasn’t entirely good either, saying: “Today is the first day, so naturally many people came to visit. Once the novelty wears off, it will improve.” Though he said this, an image of a lonely little figure jumped into his mind.

He couldn’t help but add: “While health is important, just having you lie in bed isn’t pleasant either. How about this—tomorrow I’ll have Qing Yuan accompany you to the dharma hall to hear Master Wuneng’s sermon. If you’re not interested, you can also walk around outside the temple. I’ve heard there are nearly four hundred merchant stalls set up outside the temple now, with everything imaginable for sale. You could buy something to take back as a memento.”

Yu Tang thought that if she went, Miss Xu would surely follow, and given Miss Xu’s personality, it would be quite impossible for them to remain inconspicuous.

Should she make some ground rules with Miss Xu?

Seeing Yu Tang not immediately agree, Pei Yan guessed she might be afraid of running into Peng Shiyi again. Without waiting for her response, he said: “As for Peng Shiyi, rest assured—I’ve already given orders restricting his movements. He’s a clever person and should leave in the next day or two. As for Master Wuneng, his sermons are ordinary, but his voice is resonant and his emotions full. He also tells jokes, so most people find him quite good. It would be worthwhile to go see.”

Yu Tang felt she should thank Old Madam Pei, and going to the dharma hall tomorrow to hear the sermon would be appropriate, so she agreed.

Seeing her obedience, Pei Yan was in excellent spirits and continued arranging things for her: “In the afternoon, Wuneng will debate scripture with the temple’s masters—it’s all noisy arguing with nothing worth hearing. You should rest in your room, read some leisure books, paint a few pictures, or have a medical woman come give you moxibustion and massage. I’ll speak to Hu Xing about it. If you have any matters, you can also direct him to handle them.”

The Third Steward of the Pei household—no matter how urgent her business, how could she presume to direct him!

Yu Tang could sense Pei Yan’s concern for her. She still obediently responded “yes.”

Pei Yan felt even more satisfied, thinking he should arrange more activities to keep Yu Tang occupied.

His mind raced.

Having silversmiths come to make jewelry… not quite appropriate.

Buying some young maids to keep her company on the swings… those young maids couldn’t learn proper etiquette immediately.

Having his nieces come keep her company—all his nieces seemed absorbed in Master Wuneng’s Buddhist tales and might not be willing.

The sermon assembly still had several more days—what could he find for Miss Yu to do so she wouldn’t be bored?

For a moment, Pei Yan was out of ideas.

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