Fei Zhiwen went with Pei Yan to a nearby pavilion.

Pei Yan thought Fei Zhiwen would speak directly with him about this matter, but who knew Fei Zhiwen would look at the scenery for quite a while without making a sound.

Early summer already had little insects flying about everywhere. Pei Yan swatted several small insects in succession, and Fei Zhiwen still showed no intention of speaking. He became somewhat impatient and said: “Senior Brother, you sought me out—surely it’s not because you want to discuss your position at the Ministry of Personnel with me?”

Although Fei Zhiwen and Pei Yan were fellow apprentice brothers under the same master, their age difference and experiences meant their personal relationship wasn’t particularly intimate. He had heard from Zhang Ying about Pei Yan’s frankness and intelligence, but hadn’t expected Pei Yan would be this direct and sharp.

Thinking of how Yu Tang looked together with Pei Yan, he couldn’t help but laugh self-deprecatingly before saying softly: “I sought you out, indeed, because of a private matter!”

Having said this, he fell silent again for a long while.

Pei Yan was still thinking about Yu Tang who had returned to their lodgings alone. Hearing this, he secretly rolled his eyes and, forcibly suppressing his displeasure, said: “Senior Brother, since you sought me out, you must have given this much consideration. Setting aside everything else, you should feel that these words are something I can hear, that I’m suitable to hear them. Then what else do you have to hesitate about? Or perhaps you need to consider for a few more days? Wait until you feel you’re ready, then tell me?”

Fei Zhiwen just laughed and said: “What’s the rush to go back? Lady Pei has so many maids and servants around her—are you still afraid no one will keep her company?”

Pei Yan said without the slightest embarrassment: “How can maids and servants compare to me? She should want me to accompany her most of all!”

His righteous and confident tone left Fei Zhiwen speechless for quite a while. Finally, laughing and shaking his head, he said: “You’re that confident?”

“Of course!” Pei Yan said. “No matter what, I’m her husband. If she’d rather have maids and servants keep her company than have me accompany her, then she must be dissatisfied with me, and I’d have to find a way to discover what’s making her dissatisfied and eliminate that dissatisfaction! Otherwise, if she doesn’t say anything and I don’t ask, with time it will accumulate and definitely cause problems. If you don’t believe me, ask Yin Mingyuan. I see him constantly accompanying Young Lady Yin everywhere, strolling about without finding her talkative or troublesome. If you’re going to ask me about such things, you might as well go ask him. In my view, no one is more difficult than Young Lady Yin, yet Yin Mingyuan can respect and love her—clearly Yin Mingyuan is the truly capable one!”

Fei Zhiwen laughed and said: “You just don’t want to deal with my affairs, so you’re trying to push me off on Yin Mingyuan. If Yin Mingyuan knew you were talking about his wife like this behind his back, he definitely wouldn’t be pleased.”

Pei Yan said: “I say the same things to his face.”

Fei Zhiwen roared with laughter. After laughing, however, his expression became desolate as he said heavily: “Actually, my wife died by hanging herself.”

Pei Yan stared at Fei Zhiwen in surprise, all sound stuck in his throat.

Perhaps having spoken the most difficult words aloud, Fei Zhiwen actually seemed relieved. Looking at the distant green mountains, he said in a low voice: “She wanted a divorce. This was impossible—even if I agreed, even if my family agreed, her natal family couldn’t afford to lose that face. My father-in-law explicitly stated that their family had no daughters who returned home. My brother-in-law even threatened that if she dared step out of the Fei family’s gates, he would strangle her with his own hands. I know my wife’s natal family. Because she married into our family, the whole family treated this as an honor. The daughters and sons of their family all became sought-after brides and grooms throughout the surrounding area. They were capable of doing what they threatened.

At the time, I discussed with her about having her move to a country estate. After all, I didn’t plan to remarry anyway.

She probably had no other options at the time, so she agreed.

But I never expected she would still hang herself.”

Speaking of this, his expression grew even more bewildered: “I can’t figure out why she would hang herself. It wasn’t as if she could truly be with someone else—could it be because of this? That she felt life had no meaning?”

Hearing this, Pei Yan hurriedly said: “Is this the reason you asked me what women want most?”

“Yes!” Fei Zhiwen said frankly. “I want to know why your wife can willingly follow you, but she could not.”

Hearing this made Pei Yan very unhappy. He retorted: “My wife didn’t marry me for that reason! It’s mainly because she likes me!”

Fei Zhiwen already understood his thick-skinned nature and had no desire to discuss such things with him. He only spoke of his own problem: “Back then, if she had glared at me with fury, would I have continued finding ways to marry her?”

Pei Yan said: “Since you haven’t wronged her in any way, why care what she thought? Didn’t you say you don’t plan to remarry? Even if your family arranges a remarriage for you, they couldn’t possibly find another commoner family again, could they?”

Fei Zhiwen was somewhat choked by his words. After quite a while, he said: “I used to feel I owed her nothing, but seeing how you all are, I feel I didn’t do as well as you. The dead are paramount. I think that what she didn’t obtain while living, I should compensate her with after death!”

“What use is it when the person is already dead!” Pei Yan muttered quietly a few times, but quickly came to his senses—this was Yu Tang’s effort to deceive Fei Zhiwen for his sake. He couldn’t ruin her hard work. His mind turned extremely quickly as he said: “Since she died by hanging, there must be a lot of gossip at home, right? With such rumors, the more you explain, the more others will think you’re feeling guilty. So my wife is right—you might as well be a good official and request some posthumous honor for her or something. When others see your attitude, naturally their comments about her will shift. A passing goose leaves its call, a passing person leaves their name. You surely can’t let her be unable to rest in peace even in the underworld!”

Fei Zhiwen looked at him with a half-smile, as if to say: Your little schemes—don’t show them off in front of me.

Pei Yan thought: It’s not that I want to scheme against you. You’re the one knowingly jumping into a pit. How can you blame me for that?

He continued without changing expression: “If you don’t believe it, you can ask others. When the person is gone, right and wrong are all left for posterity to record.”

“No wonder our teacher says that if you became an official, you’d definitely be a powerful minister,” Fei Zhiwen laughed. “Saying right and wrong are left for posterity—wouldn’t that make all those court historians mere decorations?”

“Whether they’re decorations or not, we all know in our hearts,” Pei Yan didn’t argue about such things with him. He said: “Regarding reputation and official rank titles, this is just my personal opinion. Perhaps my wife was just saying comforting words to me. Just listen and let it be.”

Fei Zhiwen neither agreed nor disagreed.

Seeing that he had no intention of discussing actual business with him, Pei Yan was too lazy to continue the pleasantries. After exchanging a few more words, he took his leave and returned to his own lodgings.

Yu Tang had been eagerly waiting. Seeing him return, she immediately pulled him into the inner chamber and urgently asked him: “How did it go? What did Minister Fei say to you?”

That gossipy appearance made Pei Yan just want to laugh. He said: “Did you guess what Minister Fei wanted to say to me?”

“Isn’t that obvious?” Yu Tang elbowed Pei Yan and said: “So late at night, intercepting you there, having specifically asked you those questions before—if it’s not to discuss his private family matters with you, what else could it be? Minister Fei was just deceiving me.”

“Aren’t you clever!” Pei Yan laughed and pinched Yu Tang’s nose.

Yu Tang tilted her head aside, dodging Pei Yan’s hand, wrinkling her nose as she urged: “Hurry up and tell me! What did he say to you?”

Pei Yan told her about Lady Fei’s death.

Yu Tang was dumbstruck and said: “This is really… Did she die at home?”

Pei Yan said: “I didn’t ask.”

Yu Tang couldn’t help murmuring: “If it were me, I wouldn’t even know where I should die.”

Before she had finished this sentence, Pei Yan scolded her with a sharp “Nonsense!” and then said: “Children’s words carry no harm, children’s words carry no harm. In a temple, how can you say such things?! No—even outside you can’t speak carelessly. Be careful lest the Bodhisattva hears!”

“Oh!” Yu Tang hurried to respond, then said: “So Minister Fei asked these questions because he wants to give Lady Fei some dignity?”

Pei Yan then told Yu Tang everything about his conversation with Fei Zhiwen in complete detail.

Yu Tang listened while frowning deeply. For a moment she didn’t know whose fault it was, so she could only praise Pei Yan: “What you said was very right. Since Minister Fei also did things that weren’t right, then let Lady Fei rest peacefully in the underworld!”

Let her depart with an unblemished reputation.

She pondered aloud: “What do you think Minister Fei will do?”

“I don’t know.” Pei Yan spread his hands. “I feel Senior Brother is being somewhat affected. If you’ve made a decision, don’t regret it. If you regret it, then act decisively. Just sitting there thinking about it is useless!”

Yu Tang sighed.

When descending the mountain, Fei Zhiwen didn’t go with them, saying he wanted to stay a few more days to perform religious rites for the departed Lady Fei.

Neither Yu Tang nor Xu Xuan said much about this matter. The two shared a carriage back to the capital and parted ways on the main street before the Pei household’s alley.

Home is still the best!

Yu Tang lay on the newly woven summer sleeping mat, feeling that even the summer heat had dissipated considerably.

She just felt somewhat sad for Lady Fei.

A bad life is better than a good death.

While alive, there’s always hope.

It happened that the newly hired cook was extremely skilled at making noodle dishes. Using hot and sour broth as a topping, even Yu Tang, who didn’t particularly like eating noodle dishes, had eaten various kinds of noodles for several consecutive days.

Xu Xuan was somewhat disdainful, saying: “This is too sour. Where did your household hire this chef from? Surely not a Jiangnan chef? Look at this huge bowl—it’s far too heavy.”

Yu Tang gave her a thumbs up and said: “A Sichuan chef. The side dishes he makes are also very delicious. This morning I had congee and ate quite a lot. Do you want to try some? I’ll have them give you a small jar to take back.”

“Great!” Xu Xuan came to mooch meals at the Pei household precisely because she found the food at home bland. She said: “Then he should be able to make chili oil. Get me some chili oil to take back so I can secretly eat a bit.”

Yu Tang didn’t dare.

That day they only ate some side dishes.

When Pei Yan returned home that evening, he talked with Yu Tang as usual, but Yu Tang clearly sensed his mood wasn’t very good.

After dinner, she deliberately pulled Pei Yan to walk in the courtyard and pointed at those tuberose flowers, saying: “Look, they’re about to bloom. What do you think?”

Pei Yan responded with a few casual remarks.

Yu Tang simply stopped beating around the bush and said: “Has something happened with Minister Fei?”

“What could happen with him?” Pei Yan asked strangely, then suddenly understood and laughed: “You think that since Senior Brother Fei specially sought us out, he should have made a decision, right? Speaking of this matter, there really is news—recently he’s been frequently entering the inner palace and has begun writing ritual texts for His Majesty. His Majesty is extremely pleased and says that in a few days he’ll go to Baiyun Temple and has specifically designated Senior Brother Fei to accompany him.”