Linmu Qingfen, slender willow branches with verdant leaves.

Being able to see such beautiful scenery meant I was still alive.

Heaven treats me sometimes poorly, sometimes kindly. After tormenting me through death and revival, it finally showed mercy and left me with a life.

I followed the river current and crashed into a traveling physician’s wooden boat. After he revived me, he explained: “Water had accumulated in your lungs—I used the Nine Revolutions Reincarnation Needle to expel it. Your blood flowed like a fountain—fortunately I had my family’s secret hemostatic formula…” It was all nonsense, really. Simply put, his medical skills were superb, and he had a benevolent physician’s heart.

This benevolent divine physician was surnamed Zhou, but absolutely refused to reveal his given name. Seeing his advanced age, I figured he had some unspeakable secret, so I was too lazy to press the matter. He said he was drifting north to the capital on this small boat to take the Imperial Medical Academy examination.

This was an excellent opportunity, yet he complained and blamed himself all the way. When I casually asked a couple of questions, he would ramble on about how he originally possessed unparalleled medical talent but was forced to enter the mundane world and compete for empty fame, shamefully failing his master’s teachings, and so forth.

I didn’t want to discourage him, but seeing him constantly elevating himself, I couldn’t help but retort: “If you truly have such ability, wouldn’t the Imperial Medical Academy be eagerly seeking you out?”

He blew his beard and glared, cursing irritably: “No matter how high this old man’s medical skills, without treating some important personage, how can I gain fame? It was rare to save a little girl like you from death’s door, but with no other witnesses, it’s as if I saved you for nothing.”

He had indeed saved me for nothing.

I was neither a famous personage nor was he some great philanthropist running a shelter. When the boat reached shore, we parted ways.

Earlier he had complained all the way about having no travel funds, but after taking the silver from me as medical fees, he cheerfully instructed me to go home early while he went to the capital to take the imperial physician examination.

I truly didn’t know where I could find my home. I had once considered one person the only one in this world, but only when he forgot me did I discover that in this vast world, I didn’t belong anywhere at all.

I wandered in tattered clothes, not eating or drinking, my mind in a daze, thinking that apparently, my life’s end would be dying on the streets.

Facts proved that I couldn’t die from falling off cliffs, couldn’t die from hanging, couldn’t die from hidden arrows, couldn’t die from raging rivers, so naturally I wouldn’t die from hunger and cold either.

When I drifted half-dead past a steamed bun stall, swallowing saliva while staring at the vendor uncle, the scene I imagined was him waving me away after learning I didn’t have a single coin. Unexpectedly, the uncle stuffed two buns into my hands: “Little girl ran away from home, didn’t you? Go back early, don’t let your family worry.”

When I shivered in the cold wind, desolately despairing that I’d never see tomorrow’s sun, an old granny who came out to fetch water forcibly pulled me inside to warm by the fire, absolutely refusing to let me spend the night outside.

At such times I couldn’t help but feel my nose tingle with emotion, while secretly wondering if the local customs weren’t a bit too simple and honest. Wasn’t this the capital’s outskirts? Just steps away from that prosperous, extravagant capital city!

Just when I was letting myself waste away to death but couldn’t manage to die no matter what, I inadvertently witnessed a scene of soldiers oppressing common people.

Coincidentally, the oppressed commoner was the uncle who had generously given me buns a few days earlier.

These soldiers with knives at their waists smashed his stall and charged into his home, rummaging around for quite a while. I heard the leader shout something, then the kneeling bun uncle cried his innocence with a mouthful of protests, which were undoubtedly ignored.

I leaned against the side, gnawing on a steamed bun while observing the situation’s development. I saw a woman with a slightly protruding belly run out of the house chasing after and calling “husband”—clearly the uncle’s wife. Those soldiers found her an eyesore and pushed her around. Only then did I realize the seriousness of the situation and quickly got up to support the aunt who nearly fell.

Without obstruction, the soldiers smoothly hauled the uncle away.

They hadn’t gone far when another group of troops blocked the bustling road and ordered the people on both sides to kneel, saying Princess Xiangyi was making an inspection tour to understand the people’s conditions.

Upon hearing the princess’s title, those originally arrogant soldiers hastily and respectfully made way, smiling obsequiously. I thought this troublesome princess was just acting out of boredom—if she truly wanted to understand the people’s conditions, traveling incognito would be more reliable. This kind of grand display was purely for showing off her authority.

Golden palace palanquins approached with a mighty procession, the scene’s majesty needing no description. Princess Xiangyi sat in the square palanquin where no one could see her appearance. Presumably she was looking down through the curtain gaps at the harmonious scene of a crowd of commoners kneeling orderly, feeling quite pleased.

Unfortunately, Heaven wouldn’t let her be pleased.

The aunt in my arms, probably too greatly shocked and not clearheaded, actually rushed before the palanquin, her face covered in tears as she screamed heartbreakingly: “Princess Xiangyi… please, Princess Xiangyi, uphold justice…”

I couldn’t help but palm my forehead. So as I said, traveling incognito would be more convenient—circling around like this, who knows how many grievance-crying commoners it would attract.

Princess Xiangyi was worthy of being Princess Xiangyi. No matter how heart-rending the aunt’s cries, she remained unmoved, letting the soldiers drag the aunt aside. Even after the phoenix carriage departed, she didn’t utter a sound.

After the carriages left and people dispersed, what remained was the aunt collapsed on the ground weeping in despair.

I thought it over, helped her into the house, and comforted her: “Aunt, don’t worry. Tell me what this is about and see if I can help in any way.”

She looked at me puzzledly. I explained: “I once received kindness from your husband.” No more, no less—two buns.

She examined me for a long while, then finally shook her head: “Miss, I appreciate your kind intentions, but this matter…”

This matter was indeed difficult to handle. Though her ability to express herself was limited, it wasn’t hard to understand.

The aunt’s husband, the uncle, was named Wang Qi. They originally had a son working as a servant in the Ling family in the capital. Two years ago, he supposedly contracted a sudden illness. When the steward there carried him back, the corpse had already rotted. The grief of losing their child nearly cost both husband and wife their lives—truly tragic.

This matter had passed long ago, but somehow Wang Qi heard that his son had actually been beaten to death by the Ling family’s young master. Someone had witnessed it that very day. In his grief and anger, he brought the Ling family young master before the capital magistrate. This Ling family was a prominent household in the capital, and the newly appointed magistrate naturally didn’t want to offend them. Moreover, though Wang Qi had witnesses, he lacked physical evidence, so the case just ended inconclusively.

However, the Ling family young master wasn’t so magnanimous. Finding fault every few days was one thing, but this time he claimed a hundred taels of silver had gone missing from the family treasury, and when pursuing the theft, the trail led to Wang Qi’s home. Sure enough, that group of soldiers actually found the treasury keys in his house and arrested him. In a couple of days when court convened, if the case was decided, decades of imprisonment would be unavoidable.

I said: “It’s obvious the Ling family young master wants to eliminate this thorn in his side to prevent future troubles. Though this case has holes, with them—one official, one merchant—insisting together, Uncle will likely be convicted.”

The aunt wept upon hearing this.

I continued: “Originally you could consider appealing to the Ministry of Justice, but just now when you begged the princess and she completely ignored you, those officials will surely have heard about it. She is the regent princess—even His Royal Highness the Crown Prince defers to her. Under such circumstances, who would dare interfere with this case?”

At this point I was surprised to find my thinking particularly clear, though I didn’t know why.

The aunt cried so hard she nearly fainted. I reflected on whether my words were inappropriate and was about to fall silent when I heard her sob: “If he can’t return, I cannot live alone either.”

This sentence plucked at my heartstrings. I rose and rushed out the door, but that thought I’d been suppressing kept haunting me, and I ultimately stopped.

Seeing me return, the aunt was clearly stunned. I forced a smile—since I didn’t want to live anyway, what harm was there in helping them?

Two days later was the fourth day of the seventh lunar month. “Seven-four, seven-four” sounded like “go die, go die”—an inauspicious omen. I very much wanted to back out, but having spoken too confidently before, I had to bite the bullet and go through with it. This lesson made me deeply appreciate the essence of “think thrice before acting.” As they say, “learn wisdom from every setback”—I just didn’t know if I’d have a chance to use this wisdom. I could only console myself with “hearing the Way in the morning, one can die content in the evening.”

The capital magistrate’s court was truly extraordinary. Officials from all six bureaus and three divisions assembled in ranks, and even the magistrate had an imposing, dignified air. When he called for order, he nearly shocked Uncle and Aunt unconscious. Standing in the hall, I felt my body and thoughts equally light and insubstantial, occasionally glancing toward the Ling family young master.

Actually, I was just marveling at how this handsome young master could do such inhumane things. But when he winked and made faces at the imposing official on the bench, I instantly understood.

Speaking of which, the reason I could brazenly stand in the hall as an eyewitness, claiming to be Wang Qi’s distant niece who was also staying at their house the night of the incident, was thanks to this Ling family young master. I had tricked him by saying I desperately needed silver and wanted to cooperate with him to frame Uncle. Upon hearing this, he happily gave me one tael of silver and promised another upon success.

Using two taels of silver to buy someone to give false testimony—given his level of intelligence, if he truly fell into my hands, it wouldn’t be unjust.

Magistrate Sir went through the routine formalities with ghost-like nonsense, but impressively, he made it sound authentic. From nightsoil collectors to oil-cake selling young ladies, everyone could serve as witnesses. In the end, I acted most convincingly, saying I saw Uncle carrying a box in the back courtyard in the middle of the night, sneaking around. When opened—wow, it was full of gleaming silver! At this point, the magistrate and the Ling young master showed satisfied smiles.

Supposedly with both human and material evidence, this case could be concluded.

Stories often have divine reversals at critical moments. At this time, someone among the common people watching the trial from outside the hall raised a question: “Miss, you said you saw the silver in the box in the middle of the night in the courtyard, but there was no moon at all on the first of the seventh month—how did you see it?”

I was stunned. The Ling young master was startled. Magistrate Sir angrily said: “Audacious troublemaker, daring to make noise in the solemn court… Guards!”

The person had already disappeared.

I sighed in relief. Ten taels of silver to hire a loud-voiced beggar from the street to shout this once, then slip away while everyone’s attention was focused on the court—it was well worth it for him. So one must be generous and never naively think two taels of silver can buy people’s hearts.

To perform the complete act, I assumed a submissive manner: “I… it was Uncle who… he lit a torch…”

Someone in the crowd refuted again: “Wasn’t there heavy rain that night? How could a torch be lit?” “Right, who would dare show light when stealing…” This time it was spontaneous.

The forceful questioning caused everyone present to discuss among themselves. I tugged at the Ling young master’s sleeve: “Young Master, I said everything as you told me—why don’t they believe it…”

Instantly the surroundings fell silent.

The Ling young master turned pale, pointing at me with trembling fingers: “So you were in cahoots! This is slander!”

So what if it’s slander! I continued with a mournful expression: “Are you still going to give me that one tael of silver…”

The scene undoubtedly erupted into chaos.

In the end, it was Magistrate Sir’s gavel that subdued the commotion. He angrily said to me: “I can see now—you deliberately came to disrupt the court!”

You’ve finally caught on, sir.

Seeing this drama had reached its end, I relaxed my tense expression and said seriously: “They were innocent to begin with, Sir.”

The magistrate stared dumbfounded at my rapid face-changing ability, and after a long while, coldly laughed: “My officers found the Ling family treasury keys in Wang Qi’s home. Are you saying this official deliberately conspired to frame Wang Qi?”

This was indeed a serious accusation. Under normal circumstances, one should vehemently deny it—”How dare I, how dare I! Sir is honest and just, how could you do such a thing,” and so forth. But since I was determined to save Uncle, I naturally answered: “That is precisely my meaning.”

Gasps echoed through the hall.

The magistrate was so angry his nose went crooked: “Audacious troublemaker, daring to slander a court official! Guards, fifty strokes with the rod!”

I calmly stood up, clasped my hands behind my back, and surveyed all around, sternly saying: “Who dares!”

This “Who dares!” required both light, effortless authority and composed, unruffled bearing. Both expression and movement had to be perfectly precise. Though I had practiced awkwardly these past two days, at this moment I could actually perform it smoothly, and I couldn’t help but admire myself somewhat.

The bailiffs were clearly intimidated by me and didn’t immediately rush forward. The magistrate was even more bewildered: “Why wouldn’t I dare… Who… who are you?”

I curved my lips slightly, pulled out a jade pendant from my bosom, waved it before his eyes, and said leisurely: “Sir doesn’t recognize this palace, but surely you recognize this?”

The magistrate’s blank expression froze instantly upon seeing the characters on the jade pendant, his whole body trembling uncontrollably: “You… you are Princess Xiangyi…”

I put away the jade pendant and laughed coldly with a flick of my sleeve: “Not completely blind after all.”

This was a standard trope from opera scripts. He turned pale and stood dazed for a moment, then hurriedly knelt and kowtowed: “This… this humble official pays respects to Princess Xiangyi. This humble official was blind and failed to recognize Mount Tai. Please forgive this humble official, Princess.”

Looking at everyone kneeling around me, I fingered the jade pendant in my bosom, wondering if this situation wasn’t going too smoothly—how was it different from what I’d expected?

Admittedly, this jade pendant was bought from a jade shop, and the characters on it were carved by me myself. The carving marks were still fresh, and there must be a world of difference between it and a real phoenix jade. Shouldn’t this magistrate have water in his brain not to distinguish even this?

Seeing I didn’t respond, he said fearfully: “May I ask why the Princess is dressed this way, and why…”

“A few days ago, this woman burst through this palace’s phoenix carriage crying injustice—did Sir hear of this matter?”

“Slightly… slightly heard of it.”

“This palace originally was too lazy to bother, but later thinking carefully, this woman was pregnant yet dared to obstruct this palace—perhaps there truly was injustice. Moreover, Sir has newly assumed this position, and His Royal Highness the Crown Prince is extremely concerned.” I smiled, trying my best to smile eerily. “This palace disguised myself, first to investigate the case, second to see whether you sit firmly in this capital magistrate position. Who would have thought…”

I deliberately drew out the syllables without finishing. The magistrate swallowed and kowtowed repeatedly: “This humble official has been ineffective…”

I saw the Ling young master was already so frightened he couldn’t even kneel steadily, and said gently to Uncle and Aunt: “This palace testifies to Wang Qi’s innocence. You may rise.”

Uncle and Aunt stared blankly at me, repeatedly kowtowing in gratitude. I maintained composure on the surface while feeling extremely anxious inside—stop bowing, you two. If this drags on and they come to their senses, it’ll be exposed, and there’ll be no escaping corporal punishment.

At this moment, someone suddenly said: “She’s not the princess.”

Everyone looked in unison toward the source of the voice—it was an elderly woman. I recognized her as the water-carrying granny who had sheltered me that night. She trembled as she said to me: “Miss, that night you were shivering from cold, and I saved you. Do you still remember? Oh my, impersonating a princess is a capital offense—you mustn’t act recklessly!”

Already acting recklessly. Originally there might have been a chance to escape, but with your shouting, corporal punishment was now a certainty, old granny.

The magistrate sensed something was wrong.

He hesitated briefly, then stood up and had people bring the old granny to the court for detailed questioning. Don’t look at her advanced age and slow walking—her memory was excellent. She recounted every detail clearly, as if it were real.

Ahem, this time it was indeed true.

After listening, the magistrate’s expression cleared somewhat, but he still didn’t dare confirm. Fearing that if it really was the princess experiencing common life out of boredom, he’d be in serious trouble, he went to ask the Ling young master: “You’ve attended palace banquets with your honorable father—can you recognize whether she is Princess Xiangyi?”

The Ling young master scratched his head looking at me: “At first she seemed somewhat similar, but now she doesn’t look much like her…”

I sighed rather melancholically. So the Ling young master’s words were as good as saying nothing—clearly he’d never actually seen the real princess.

The magistrate obviously realized this too and finally turned his gaze back to me: “May I examine the jade pendant once more?”

I shrugged to indicate he was welcome to.

The magistrate took the jade pendant and examined it for a long while, finally pointing at me: “You’re not the princess at all!”

I raised an eyebrow.

“This object has inferior jade quality and crude carving—it absolutely cannot be a palace item! Audacious troublemaker, daring to impersonate Princess Xiangyi!”

Now the jig was completely up and there was no escape. I simply surrendered, but unexpectedly a bailiff suddenly ran in from outside the magistrate’s office, saying urgently: “Sir! Master Song has come and says he wants to see you!”

Upon hearing this, the magistrate actually threw back his head and laughed loudly: “Quickly invite him in! I didn’t expect the Prince Consort to visit—what perfect timing!”

Even the Prince Consort was involved?

I could finally completely relax.

Actually, all the false testimony and fake jade pendants were just smoke screens. All this fuss was simply to make this princess impersonation court case a big deal—the bigger the better, so it would reach the princess’s ears.

Since she had ignored it before, only by making her pay attention again could this case have a chance.

After all, this absurd wrongful case couldn’t withstand the slightest scrutiny.

Of course, there was always the possibility that the princess would angrily have everyone eliminated to vent her fury. But thinking again, if Wang Qi were convicted, he’d be silenced sooner or later anyway. Early death, late death—it was all inevitable, so what harm was there in gambling once?

As for me… if I could depart this world in such a manner, while it couldn’t be called dying without regrets, it could at least be considered a meaningful death.

In my daze I heard the magistrate’s terrified prostration, only then realizing the Prince Consort had already entered the hall.

The magistrate said: “Master Song, your timing is perfect. There’s a shrew here impersonating Princess Xiangyi, attempting to disrupt the court…”

“Oh?” A clear, calm voice. “Who has such audacity?”

That would be this humble unworthy young lady here.

I turned around with resignation.

That was an upright figure, dark official robes setting off an elegant, noble bearing, like spring green waves—what a magnificent sight.

So this was the famous number one Prince Consort of Daqing.

Some people are born with good looks, while others are born with golden spoons. Those who possess the former don’t necessarily possess the latter, and those who possess the latter don’t necessarily possess the former.

People who possess both must be cursed by Heaven. So I thought.

Seeing me, he stiffened slightly and said with utter disbelief: “You…”

Me what? I just impersonated your wife—what’s so surprising about that?

He continued staring at me fixedly, his clear gaze looking directly into my eyes. Being stared at with such an expression made me somewhat uncomfortable, so I stepped back slightly. Unexpectedly, he suddenly strode forward, giving me no chance to react, and embraced me with all his might.

The ancients had an old saying: “Great disaster brings great fortune.”

All along, I didn’t understand how I had clearly survived great disasters multiple times, yet the great fortune never came. Now remembering, I couldn’t help but sigh that this great fortune wasn’t delayed—rather, the fortune was too great and had to come slowly. Once it came, it came with tremendous force.

The Prince Consort held me for a long time before uttering two words: “Princess…”

At that moment, my previously chaotic mind inexplicably produced a phrase:

Prince Consort Song Langsheng of the current dynasty, peerlessly handsome that Heaven envies; Princess Xiangyi Xiao Qitang, with one hand covering the sky, ten thousand承受.

Author’s Note:

So as I said, this is a lighthearted story.

Reading it feels great—you all understand.

But really, you can’t find many people in all of Jinjiang who update this much in one chapter! I could totally split this into three updates to trick you into more comments! But I still published it all at once—super wronged, right! Speaking of which, I’m reminded of that “Writing Novels is So Hard” rant version I wrote—have you all heard it? If you have, then leave me comments, okay? Okay?!!

Actually, when authors pressure for comments, they’re usually like this…

When readers are pressured by authors for comments, they’re usually like this…

So let’s be entangled endlessly forever…