Rain curtains shrouded the sky above the capital, pattering down on the mountain forests and cliff faces.

This scene inevitably reminded me of that rain-soaked red robe from not long ago.

However, Song Langsheng was not the only one in this world who wore red robes.

Court officials from first to fourth rank all wore crimson robes. The Minister of Justice held the third rank, with golden thread embroidering sparrows on his chest… but the person before me wore official robes with cloud swallow patterns, indicating fourth rank.

Director of the Imperial Academy, fourth rank.

I watched him warily, trying to support myself up, but was startled by the pain from the wounds in my palms.

“Don’t move, just sit.” Nie Ran’s voice drifted into the cave. He walked to my side, crouched down, and took my hands, turning them over. Seeing the palms densely covered with holes torn by tree branches, blood flowing freely, his brow furrowed deeply. “This—”

I pulled my hands back and asked: “How does Lord Nie come to be here?”

Nie Ran didn’t answer, instead lowering his head to tear his inner shirt into long strips. He lifted my hands and slowly wiped away the blood pearls, not giving me a chance to withdraw them. Only after both hands were properly bandaged did he release them, saying: “I saw the Princess leap from the cliff. The situation was urgent, so I…”

I couldn’t believe it. “You saw me fall from the cliff and followed me down?”

“I,” he paused, “just vaguely remembered there was a climbing tree down here.” He removed the dagger from his waist—its blade was worn and battered. “I used this dagger to slide down the cliff face, and only jumped down when I saw the large tree.”

I was stunned. Only Xu Fang and I knew about the tree in this ravine. For Nie Ran to jump down without hesitation upon seeing me fall from the cliff, could it be…

“You’re saying you remembered there was a tree here… your memory has returned?”

He suddenly looked up at me and said: “I only have scattered impressions. Everything else, I remember nothing.”

An inexplicable sense of loss arose in my heart. I didn’t know what I was feeling lost about, but thinking that the person before me was not Xu Fang but Nie Ran, I felt several degrees of fear, utterly puzzled as to how he could appear on Ling Mountain so “opportunely” to save me in the deep night dew.

Nie Ran seemed not to notice my expression. He frowned and suddenly asked: “Here… is this also injured?”

Following his gaze downward, I only then noticed blood slowly seeping from my abdomen, staining my clothes. Looking closer, there was indeed a thin branch embedded in my flesh, though I couldn’t tell how long or deep it was, causing so much blood to flow from such a small wound.

Nie Ran reached out to lift my outer robe. I jumped in fright, quickly turning sideways to avoid him. The slightest movement sent sharp pain throughout my body, cold sweat dripping down. “Lord Nie, please conduct yourself properly.”

Nie Ran grasped my shoulder. “If this pierced your spleen, continued bleeding could cost you your life. Why cling to such proprieties!”

I was intimidated by his angry expression. “Even if it concerns my life, it’s my own life—no need for your worry. Can’t Lord Nie distinguish between sovereign and subject?”

Nie Ran said: “In that case, this subject can only offend you. Please forgive me, Princess!”

With these words, he forcibly lifted my hem. I tried to avoid him, but with the stone wall behind me, there was nowhere to go. Just as he removed my outer robe, several objects slipped from within my garments, rolling to the ground with soft sounds.

They were the military tally and scroll.

Nie Ran was stunned and stopped his hands. I couldn’t help but sigh and close my eyes.

In the end, they were still discovered.

Indeed, everything I had said before jumping from the cliff was deliberate deception of Feng Li. How could I possibly bury such important items randomly in the mountains? What if he found them, or other interested parties discovered them?

I dared not take such a risk.

So I feigned suicide, hoping to successfully escape with the military tally.

But unexpectedly, Nie Ran appeared.

Nie Ran picked up a military tally, frowning slightly, then looked at me.

I don’t know how I could still smile. “It seems you were still a move ahead. This military tally and roster have ultimately fallen into your hands.”

Nie Ran met my gaze. “You’re saying I’m in league with Feng Li?”

I countered: “Don’t tell me your appearance here tonight was just a coincidence.”

Nie Ran sighed: “I wholeheartedly wanted to save the Princess…”

“Nie Ran, the red clay on your shoes is unique to the mass burial ground, showing you’ve been following me from the start tonight… If you truly wanted to save me, couldn’t you have done so when I escaped from the tomb?” I was utterly exhausted. “You didn’t want to save me—you wanted the military tally in my hands.”

Nie Ran’s expression darkened. “If I were in league with Feng Li, we could have captured the Princess when you escaped the tomb! Not knowing the Princess’s plans, I could only protect you secretly. Earlier, seeing you in such despair at the cliff’s edge, I intended…”

I didn’t want to hear more of his words and interrupted: “Enough!”

Seeing me like this, he truly fell silent. “Believe it or not, time will tell.”

“True or false—what does it matter? I probably won’t live to see that day.”

Hearing this, Nie Ran stiffened and didn’t continue speaking. The cave fell silent for a while. Suddenly, he said something completely out of context: “Did you think the same way back then?”

I raised my lashes in confusion.

Half of Nie Ran’s silhouette was unclear in the shadows. “At that time, when you were struck by a long arrow, fell into the abyss, and were swept away by river waves, did you think you could make it to today? How can you know you can’t continue now?”

These words suddenly made me feel somewhat dazed.

In my mind, Xu Fang’s dawn-like face suddenly appeared. The memory seemed distant—when I was still the helpless, temperamental He Feng who suffered from amnesia, he would often say to me: “Silly girl, how can you know how far you can go if you don’t keep walking?”

I stared blankly at Nie Ran. When had his eyes lost their unique coldness and depth, replaced instead by…

“Don’t look at me with Xu Fang’s eyes, and don’t say things Xu Fang used to say.” I felt my voice trembling slightly. “You’re not him.”

Nie Ran pulled me close: “I never wanted to look at you with anyone else’s eyes. What I want to say to you is only what I want to say. What I do for you is only what I want to do!”

“If you truly cared for me, why did you appear before me? If not for your appearance, how could Xu Fang have disappeared? If Xu Fang hadn’t disappeared…”

If Xu Fang hadn’t disappeared, perhaps… I wouldn’t have had to fall in love with Song Langsheng again.

How wonderful… that would have been.

I thought Nie Ran wouldn’t continue my words, but unexpectedly he said: “If Xu Fang hadn’t disappeared, you wouldn’t have had to fall in love with Song Langsheng again, right?”

I couldn’t answer, clenching my fists tightly, my palms aching from my fingernails.

Nie Ran’s pupils flashed with hidden anger. “So even at this point, you still think of Song Langsheng! Do you know what your disappointed and dejected expression looked like when you saw it was me who came? Have you considered that if Song Langsheng had come down, you’d already be dead!”

Every word, every sentence tore apart every inch of skin and reason, all pain knotted together. “Yes! I think of Song Langsheng entirely, even after recovering all my memories, even remembering everything he did to me! So if you truly care for me, tell me where he went. Even if… he wants me dead, even if he wants me dead, I still want to see him once!”

Nie Ran gripped my shoulders tighter and tighter. “Princess, have you gone mad?”

“If I weren’t mad, why would I give up being a proper princess and end up in such a state?” I knew my tears were falling again. “Since I only have a few days left anyway, wouldn’t it be better to die before him and satisfy his wishes?”

The distant mountains were heavy, the sea of lights below the cliff gradually dimmed, and heaven and earth were all black.

Suddenly, sharp pain shot through my abdomen. I instinctively pressed the wound, my vision suddenly went white, and just as I was about to faint, Nie Ran supported me, saying: “If he hadn’t disappeared, at this moment, he would also prioritize your life and safety.”

With these words, saying no more, he pressed me down flat and cleanly tore open the clothing around the wound.

When Nie Ran wanted to use force, how could I possibly stop him?

Though I had intended to say that if he could knock me unconscious first before treating the wound, it might be less painful and embarrassing.

Clearly, Nie Ran lacked such awareness.

Therefore, when he forcibly extracted the barbed branch from my body, I truly cried to the point of heartbreak and wished for death.

Only after he sprinkled medicinal powder on my stomach and wrapped it three to five times to stop the bleeding did I open my eyes, gasping for breath.

But his eyes were tightly closed.

After silent moments, he picked up my outer robe and covered me with it, slowly opening his eyes.

Then he placed his gaze precisely on my face.

Perhaps it was because I had cried until my face was streaked, prompting him to reach out to wipe the corners of my eyes.

But thinking of something, his fingertips brushed before my eyes then suddenly stopped.

I thought he was going to say something, but after waiting a long time, I didn’t hear him speak.

Being stared at by him made me quite uncomfortable. “Regardless, thank you for saving me.”

He didn’t move his gaze away. “I owe the Princess a life. If you hadn’t risked yourself to block that arrow that day, I probably couldn’t stand here today. Now, consider this repaying that favor.”

I shook my head. “The person I wanted to save that day wasn’t you. You needn’t take it to heart.”

Nie Ran fell silent again. I couldn’t read his expression. As drowsiness invaded again, I simply closed my eyes, when I suddenly heard him say: “If I could find that Xu Fang from back then for you, would you not be so sad?”

My heart suddenly constricted.

His voice was hoarse, carrying a slight tremor: “If that person from back then… who wanted you to hit him hard on the head with a jade flute when he changed his heart, who wanted you to wait for him at Suiyang Inn, who was willing to give up everything for you, who would say to you ‘heaven is vast, earth is broad, anywhere can be home’—if that Xu Fang could return…”

I slowly propped myself up, my arms shaking violently. For a moment, I dared not look up at him. His voice echoed hollowly in the cave: “Would you… be able to become He Feng again?”

———————— Second Update ————————————————————————

A arc of moonlight slowly slid across his face. That gentle gaze was too familiar. I seemed frozen in place, staring blankly at him. “Xu… Fang?”

Complex light flowed in his eyes. Taking a deep breath, he asked: “If I said I was, would you believe me?”

My heart was in chaos. “I don’t know.”

But he said quietly: “I’m not.”

I stared at him blankly. “But that phrase—only Xu Fang and I knew it.”

Nie Ran first shook his head, then nodded. “Those words between you and him, I didn’t know.”

I tried to calm myself. “I don’t understand… I don’t understand what you mean.”

“Xu Fang, before he disappeared, wrote a letter.” Nie Ran lowered his lashes. “Written to me.”

“Before he… disappeared? Written to you?” I widened my eyes. “At that time, wasn’t he returning to the marquis mansion to bid farewell to his family before taking me away? Why would he still write a letter—”

Nie Ran was silent for a moment, seeming to want to answer my question but didn’t speak.

But I seemed to understand everything in an instant.

“Could it be… at that time, he already knew he was going to disappear?” I said with trembling hands. “Why? What happened then?” Seeing him not answer, I grabbed his sleeve. “Where’s the letter? What did it say?”

Nie Ran looked at me motionlessly, suddenly smiled—that smile filled with bitterness. “That letter… I never read it.”

“Why?”

“Before leaving, he told Yanran that what was written in that letter was… the method for Nie Ran to become Xu Fang again.” Nie Ran looked up, his eyes like water, gazing at me lightly. “And I was unwilling.”

All these things that had been like mist suddenly passed like wind, revealing faint, thin light.

Nie Ran said: “When I first awakened and heard them speak of my actions during my amnesia, I simply couldn’t believe it. I couldn’t believe I would abandon everything for a woman—all my beliefs, all my responsibilities. I, Nie Ran, am not that kind of person.” He looked toward the distant sky, saying lightly: “So I had Yanran destroy the letter.”

I was suddenly shocked.

Nie Ran’s brow furrowed slightly. “But Yanran… she disagreed. She repeatedly told me—”

At that time, when Nie Ran was determined to destroy the letter, Zhao Yanran desperately clutched the letter, saying: “Brother Ran, you personally gave me this letter, you told me to keep it safe, you said ‘heaven is vast, earth is broad, only she is your home’… If you destroy it, you’re not just destroying a letter—you’re destroying yourself!”

Nie Ran’s account was very calm.

But all of this was completely contrary to my imagination.

I had always thought that when Zhao Yanran discovered her beloved had lost those memories of Xu Fang, she chose silence, chose to erase them, in order to be with him.

I asked: “Why? Zhao Yanran… doesn’t she like you very much? Why would she…” Why would she push away the man she loved for a woman like me, whom she barely knew?

“Seeing Yanran like that, I was also confused and bewildered.” Nie Ran lowered his head. “What exactly happened that year? What did I, with ‘Xu Fang’s’ memories, say to Yanran? Yanran… had always wanted to marry me since childhood. But Yanran—”

Zhao Yanran said: “Brother Ran, precisely because I’ve played with you since childhood, you were never a happy person, never someone who would be honest about your feelings. But in recent days, the ‘Xu Fang’ I saw, that ‘Xu Fang’ who still existed even after Nie Ran’s memories returned—he was truly happy. When he planned to leave for the woman he loved, I had never seen him radiate such spirit. And when he learned he would lose her, I had never seen him in such… pain. Yes, I like you, but if my affection can’t bring you happiness, then it’s merely satisfying my own wishful thinking.”

Some things slip away the harder you try to hold them, like love.

But while Yanran understood this simple truth, I didn’t.

I asked: “What happened next?”

“Later, I told Yanran she was completely wrong. I had always held her in my heart, and marrying her was also my wish. The woman I fell in love with during my amnesia was just a case of transferring affections.” Nie Ran sighed. “I deceived her.”

My heart felt blocked. “Did she believe you?”

“Perhaps she believed, perhaps not, but she treated it as true.”

Thinking back, everything that followed was just her cooperating with Nie Ran in acting, trying to force me to leave.

“But why did Yanran still let herself be deceived into going to the woods because she feared I would look for you?” I was puzzled. “She even brought a thousand taels of silver…”

Nie Ran said: “That silver… was probably what she wanted to give you.”

I thought of Zhao Yanran desperately grabbing me in the water to have Nie Ran save me, and when we met again at the tavern recently, seeing me with Song Langsheng, her eyes full of blessings.

Though we weren’t deeply acquainted, our connection was not shallow.

After a long, long time, I said: “Yanran truly is an excellent girl. Honestly speaking, if it were me, I might not have been willing to keep that letter.”

Nie Ran said: “After you were swept away by the torrent, I went to find Yanran to let me see that letter, but she said she had already burned it.”

After a moment of shock, I understood.

At that time, they thought He Feng was already dead. Why awaken Xu Fang to increase his sorrow? Better to break this attachment and let everything flow away with the waves.

I said: “Since the letter no longer exists and Xu Fang can’t return, why bring up old matters?”

Nie Ran asked: “Do you… hope he would return?”

When he said this, his pupils flashed, his expression too much like Xu Fang’s. I instinctively turned my head away and shook it.

Nie Ran didn’t understand. “Why?”

I took a deep breath. “…Over this past year and more, too many things have happened, too many truths that I’m powerless to bear… Everything has cause and effect. I don’t like to hate anyone because hatred can’t bring happiness to anyone. But sometimes, when I look back and see my efforts ununderstood, my sincere feelings ignored, everyone having their own difficulties but no one willing to consider me more important… I ultimately cannot find peace…” I paused for breath. “At this point, whether love or righteousness, great matters or human hearts, I fear I’m powerless to change anything… But just when I’m in such a state, you told me there was once such a person who did so many things for me, even prioritizing me at the final moment. I truly felt much comforted…”

Nie Ran asked: “If so, why don’t you want him to return?”

I shook my head again. “Even if he returned, what could it change? Some things, once missed, trying to turn back only adds sorrow before everything becomes unrecognizable.”

Hearing this, Nie Ran stiffened. “So you’ll just let others manipulate you, resigned to let all this dust settle?”

I forced a smile. “I’m tired, Lord Nie. Can we not discuss this anymore?”

“Why don’t you ask or inquire?” Nie Ran said. “Why don’t you try to fight for it…”

I coldly cut off his words: “I’ll say it again—I’m tired.”

“I,” he also suddenly interrupted my words, “did indeed come for the military tally tonight.”

He pointed to the military tally scattered on the ground, saying in a heavy voice: “Song Langsheng, Feng Li, and I—perhaps we’re not of one mind, but we share a common goal: eliminate the Princess, overthrow the Crown Prince’s position as heir, change dynasties, and alter the realm.”

The last four words of Nie Ran’s statement echoed back and forth in the cave. I stared blankly at him, unable to form any expression, just letting him continue: “My father was a former dynasty general. When the capital was in chaos that year, he failed to save his lord and pretended to surrender, originally to conserve strength and wait for opportunity. But your father emperor had long perceived his intentions. Not only did he eliminate all imperial bloodline of the former dynasty, he also proclaimed my father as the foremost hero in pursuing the former lord, granting him titles and lands. From then on, my father became the greatest traitor among former dynasty subjects… Under such circumstances, even holding military power, how could he speak of restoration?”

“So he chose Song Langsheng?”

Nie Ran gazed at me intently. “Song Langsheng is Prince Rui’s son. Prince Rui enjoyed great reputation in the former dynasty—he was indeed the perfect choice.”

I felt somewhat confused. “Then when… did he cooperate with your father?”

“Song Langsheng originally knew nothing of his background. He came to the capital to investigate his parents’ deaths and by chance became your Prince Consort. It wasn’t until my father found him… He once thought his father’s treason case was just a wrongful conviction, only later learning that the current emperor hadn’t killed the wrong person—he truly was a prince of the former dynasty.”

So he had known early on about the deep national hatred and family enmity between us?

I bit my lower lip and asked: “Then who is Feng Li?”

Nie Ran said: “Feng Li is my father’s strategist. Who he truly is, my father never told me. However, Feng Li is full of strategies, his rare talents and gifts are seldom seen. With his counsel over these years, my father has been able to stand firm at court.”

I wrung the front of my garments tightly with both hands. “Song Langsheng… does he truly want to be emperor?”

The distant mountains stretched endlessly, clouds and mist entwining. Nie Ran asked flatly: “Does it matter whether he wants to or not?”

Yes, what difference did wanting or not wanting make?

From the moment he chose to cooperate with Marquis Xia Yang, he was destined to be my enemy.

My heart was in turmoil, yet I still refused to give up hope. “If he has no intention of coveting power and position, only unable to let go of hatred, perhaps there’s still room for resolution…”

Hearing this, Nie Ran was astonished. “Princess! At this point—”

I looked up, staring hard at Nie Ran: “Isn’t that so? If he truly intended rebellion, since Feng Li knew where Prince Rui’s secret location was, he could have obtained the military tally and rallied thousands of troops long ago. Why delay until now?”

Nie Ran said: “That’s because Feng Li has his own ambitions—he deceived everyone! But this doesn’t mean Song Langsheng will consider you! In this world, there are no permanent enemies, only appropriate interests. As long as benefits align, they can certainly form a powerful force. Do you remember the grain transport official ship explosion case from several months ago?”

“Wasn’t that case… done by Prince Kang?”

“Did Prince Kang admit it? He dared even commit treason—if it were truly his doing, why wouldn’t he acknowledge this one case? The official ship explosion case appeared to obstruct court grain transport and interfere with the Crown Prince and Princess’s regency, but actually prevented disaster grain from reaching affected areas. When popular resentment mounted, it gave more leverage over the largest bandit forces in Jiangsu and Zhejiang… Princess, have you ever wondered where the explosives for that official ship explosion came from? With such strict gate controls, who could have the supernatural ability to bury such a large quantity of gunpowder in the official ship?” Nie Ran continued hinting: “No one could do it. The gunpowder was from the Divine Engine Battalion, and there were people secretly colluding in the Transport Bureau…”

My body swayed, almost unable to sit steadily, only hearing Nie Ran ask me: “Divine Engine Battalion Commander Wan Yi and Transport Governor Qi Zhiyu both once sat in Great Court of Justice prison for false charges. Who cleared their names—does the Princess remember?”

It was Minister of Justice Song Langsheng.

“Has the Princess ever wondered why, when the Princess fell into water, Song Langsheng so coincidentally returned from official business in time to save you?”

Unless he already knew.

I suddenly remembered something Song Langsheng once said to me: “Those who govern calculate gains and losses, weigh what is appropriate for duration, while those who uphold law do not bend the straight or let evil slip through.”

What fine words: “do not bend the straight or let evil slip through.”

Life is so ironic—who could predict that yesterday’s shield would become tomorrow’s arrow?

My vision became blurry, murmuring words I didn’t even believe: “At least he still came to save me…”

But even this last thread of hope was destroyed.

Nie Ran looked at me calmly. “Earlier, you asked where Song Langsheng went? Actually, I don’t know the details either, only that he went to see my father to discuss final matters. The two-year period has arrived, your memories have fully returned—how could he remain by your side at such a time? You must know, the final step in Feng Li’s strategy is waiting.”

I was confused for a while before understanding his words. “Waiting… for what?”

“Waiting for an opportunity that gives Song Langsheng a legitimate reason to return to the capital and disrupt the court.” Nie Ran said: “That is… waiting for the Princess to die.”

My entire body trembled involuntarily.

Nie Ran lowered his eyes. “The Princess dies suddenly. As her Prince Consort and Minister of Justice, in grief and fury he would inevitably investigate thoroughly. All involved parties couldn’t escape this disaster. Previously, when the Princess feigned death, you protected Song Langsheng, so he naturally wouldn’t attract suspicion again. Even the Crown Prince would probably fully cooperate with him to catch the real culprit. Then…”

“Then he could take the opportunity to win over more forces, coordinate from within and without, bringing you closer to success, right?” I felt tears welling up. “You wouldn’t even give me a chance for the poison to take effect. To frame more court officials and generals who obstruct your progress, you would orchestrate an elaborate assassination—this is also why Feng Li was absolutely unwilling to strike me down, because he too was waiting for the best opportunity for my death, right?”

Nie Ran no longer answered me.

My heart sank like falling into a vast, dark ocean, quietly reaching the deepest, darkest place.

In this world, there was something even more terrifying than the person I loved most wanting me dead.

That was that after my death, that person would also destroy everything I possessed and treasured in this world—

I had seen enough killing and betrayal in power struggles since childhood. The human world had regrets, but there was always light. Everyone had pain, but if one could empathize and offer sincerity, even if wishes weren’t fulfilled, one could still exchange for some genuine feeling.

Why did he treat me this way?

Why, after making me taste despair, did he make me feel hatred?

Mountain winds arose, a few leaves blowing in with the wind. I slowly said: “Nie Ran, you can tell me so much probably because you don’t want me to die with unresolved grievances. Now it’s time to act, isn’t it?”

I knew that with the military tally in hand, he had no reason to let me remain in this world.

Nie Ran seemed not to hear me speak. He lowered his head, gathered the scattered military tally and scroll, wrapped them in cloth, and placed them in my palm, saying lightly: “When dawn comes, this subject will escort the Princess down the mountain. The Princess’s injuries are serious—you should enter the palace directly for treatment by the Imperial Medical Academy.”

I suddenly looked up, almost thinking I had misheard. “Why?”

“Right now, the Princess’s residence… might not be safe…”

I stared at his calm, unruffled face. “Do you know what it means for your side if I return to the palace today?”

Nie Ran said: “This subject knows.”

I shook my head. “Do you think that by telling me the truth I could pardon your Nie family’s crimes? Do you think that by saving me I could disregard law and spare you from death?”

Nie Ran smiled faintly. “I know the Princess won’t.”

I suddenly raised my voice: “Then why let me go? Why return the military tally to me? Why tell me all the truth?!”

“Since this battle is inevitable, the Princess should be given a fair chance at the game, rather than taking advantage through endless deception and concealment—” His eyes were profound. “I’m merely doing something… that Xu Fang would do.”

I was stunned. “Something… Xu Fang would do?”

“Do you remember what I asked you earlier? I asked the Princess, if I could find Xu Fang for you, would you not be so sad?” Nie Ran’s face was like a lake. “The letter is destroyed, and I can’t bring Xu Fang back to you, but I know that if the person by the Princess’s side right now were him, he would certainly do the same.”

I looked at him deeply. “But you’re not him. You even feared becoming him again. Now, why do what Xu Fang would do?”

The horizon grew light. Looking into the distance, rays of dawn seeped through cloud layers like celestial palaces, stretching endlessly.

Nie Ran stared silently for a while, then sighed softly: “Because I, like him, am unwilling…”

Unwilling—unwilling what? But he didn’t finish.

I was momentarily speechless. Nie Ran put on his official robes again, squinting slightly as he gazed far into the distance: “Let’s go. This subject will escort the Princess back to the palace.”

Following his gaze, I looked down at this dawn scene. Not just the capital—endless mountains and rivers came into view, almost graspable with one hand.

When I was small, Father Emperor once told me that standing high up, one’s heart would involuntarily contain the vast realm.

Only among ten million people, one person alone could ascend to the peak.

And the price was stepping on the other ten million people.

I had once disagreed.

I actually… disagreed.