The prison cells of the Court of Judicial Review were always somewhat better than those at the Ministry of Justice. At least in this small space, I didn’t need to be shackled, and I had a table and chair, with bedding on the wooden bed sufficient to ward off the cold.

I had originally proposed improving the living conditions for prisoners at the Court of Judicial Review. Reaping what one sows—I never expected to benefit myself years later.

Though I considered myself merely a commoner now, hardly deserving political prisoner treatment, thinking carefully about it, this was where Song Langsheng had once worked, familiar with all the relationships above and below. Placing me here probably gave him more peace of mind.

I had been in this prison for about four or five days.

The Court Minister came almost daily with baskets to visit me, serving full spreads of wine and dishes every meal, never repeating the same dishes. I could see he wasn’t planning to interrogate me. Such attentiveness was likely due to my relationship with Song Langsheng, figuring this fake princess might transform into the nation’s mother, so he served me well. Several times I considered discussing Daqing’s legal system with him and analyzing the court structure to kill his hopes, but then thought I probably wouldn’t have many more peaceful days anyway, so why waste such fine food and drink.

After muddling through another two days like this, someone finally came to visit.

I hadn’t expected the first visitor to be Tao Yuan.

When the jailer withdrew, Tao Yuan immediately knelt: “Tao Yuan came late. The Princess has suffered…”

I stood up from the bed: “Chief Tao, I’m no longer any princess now. Just call me by my name…”

Tao Yuan said: “Regardless of your identity, you will always be the master of the Mingjian Division…”

I gently shook my head and helped him up: “What’s the situation outside now?”

Tao Yuan said: “These past few days, Xiao Jinglan has been under house arrest for insulting his superiors. His Majesty ordered the Court of Judicial Review to investigate thoroughly, and they discovered the Empress Dowager in the palace was someone Xiao Jinglan had impersonating her. The entire court was shocked. Moreover, his associates took the opportunity to raise troops in rebellion, attempting to force the palace and usurp the throne… Naturally, they were ultimately suppressed by the Imperial Guards. Xiao Jinglan is now also imprisoned in this very prison… His Majesty isn’t rushing to rescue you because this place is safest. Once the turmoil subsides slightly, he’ll immediately send me to discuss everything with the Princess in detail…”

Hearing Tao Yuan repeatedly say “His Majesty,” knowing he meant Song Langsheng, I found it hard to react for a moment: “He… truly became emperor?”

Tao Yuan slowly nodded: “Various factions are fighting fiercely now, difficult to explain in a few words. Both late emperors’ edicts gave such authorization. Though many are unwilling to submit, they can’t find a more suitable successor… His Majesty hasn’t ascended the throne yet. Several court factions are restless, and princes and marquises from various regions are rushing to the capital. If His Majesty’s words or actions show the slightest error, the situation could become unfavorable at any time. We must wait until this period passes before feeling secure…”

I leaned against the cold stone wall, taking a deep breath: “I’m afraid… at least half the court has petitioned ‘His Majesty’ to execute me…”

Tao Yuan was slightly alarmed and quickly said: “His Majesty will certainly ensure your safe release as quickly as possible. Princess needn’t worry excessively.”

I smiled noncommittally: “Has the real Empress Dowager been found?”

Tao Yuan was stunned and shook his head: “No matter what, Xiao Jinglan refuses to speak. I’m afraid…”

“No. He didn’t yet know the real Empress Dowager wasn’t his birth mother back then, so he wouldn’t have been so ruthless… I think the Empress Dowager should currently be confined somewhere…”

Seeing Tao Yuan in a thoughtful state, I looked up at him: “Could you arrange for me to meet with him?”

Jinglan was imprisoned in the deepest, most secure VIP cell in the prison.

So-called VIP treatment—it was rare to have such a high-status treasonous party member in several years.

Though it took some effort, I finally got the Court Minister’s consent to meet Jinglan. But the Court Minister insisted Jinglan was extremely dangerous and absolutely refused to have the jailer unlock the door. I simply moved a stool from my cell, sat outside his door, then dismissed everyone, wanting to speak with him alone.

Candle wax dripped like tears, flames flickering within the wooden bars.

Jinglan had heard the commotion long ago but kept his back to me, pretending to sleep. After a long while, seeing I had no intention of leaving, he slowly turned over, propping his head with one hand, gazing at me: “At this point, what are you still coming to find me for?”

His question left me unsure what to say.

Jinglan’s face was somewhat hazy in the firelight, not quite clear. I inexplicably remembered when I was very small, sneaking to the Eastern Palace to find elder brother. It was a warm spring afternoon, and he lay lazily on the couch, carelessly flipping through a book. Seeing me arrive, he smiled and ruffled my hair, asking: “Little sister, what brings you to find me?”

In the blink of an eye, all that warmth had vanished like smoke, as if it never existed, and we had become strangers.

I said indifferently: “I’m staying next door to your next door’s next door. Since there are some things I can’t figure out, I came to ask you.”

He looked at me expressionlessly for a while, then suddenly smiled: “At this stage, you’re still coming to ask about the Empress Dowager’s whereabouts for Song Langsheng? Ha, you’ve always been this stupid, which is why you were used by Jingyan and father until the very end…”

I said: “You still call him father, proving you still consider him family in your heart…”

Jinglan immediately fell silent. Seeing I was still looking at him, he curved his lips: “I consider him family—so what? What about him? What did he consider me? A chess piece to consolidate power, discarded like worn shoes after use!”

I said quietly: “Back then… it was you… after you met Miss Qi Luo, you insisted on leaving… Otherwise father…”

“Hahahahaha…” Jinglan laughed aloud, as if hearing the world’s greatest joke. “Xiangyi, oh Xiangyi, do you think back then I abandoned you all for selfish reasons and went off to enjoy myself alone?”

I looked at him in confusion.

He said: “Back then, seeing father worry excessively about former dynasty rebellions, his dragon body growing thinner daily, I wanted to help father resolve difficulties and help him root out the former dynasty’s true culprits to ease father’s worries. At that time, worried about your association with that ‘big brother’ of unknown origins, I sent people to investigate his background. Unexpectedly, I traced Jun Jinzhi through him and uncovered a massive secret from the former dynasty. I knew if he escaped, given time to unlock the former dynasty’s secret locations, it would bring another calamity to our Daqing…” His gaze turned toward the dancing candlelight. “Therefore, I schemed carefully—on one hand dispatching people to pursue the fleeing Prince Ruì’s family, on the other hand starting with the Wu family… Though I was wounded by a sword and let Prince Ruì’s family escape, I finally obtained the location of the former dynasty’s secret place…”

He stood and looked at me: “I rushed back to the capital, wanting to report this to father… Can you guess what happened? Prince Ruì’s family died during their flight. Learning I had driven them to desperation, father flew into a rage. Not only did he not praise me once, but he berated me before all civil and military officials, saying I acted on my own authority, deploying troops without permission, and that such an important lead was severed because of me… Ha, he didn’t even notice my back clothes were soaked with blood!”

I stared at Jinglan in a daze. He pointed at his own nose: “I didn’t understand then what I had done wrong. I was angry that father didn’t understand me, didn’t understand that everything I did was for him, for Daqing! So I didn’t tell him I had learned the secret location… I thought someday he would understand my devotion, and then I would confess everything…”

Jinglan’s eyes gradually reddened. He closed them: “But from then on, father grew increasingly cold toward me. No matter how well I did, how carefully I worked, he wouldn’t spare me another glance… I began to sink into despair, neglecting court affairs daily and drowning my sorrows in wine… It was then I met Qi Luo…”

Hearing this, my heart gradually sank.

Father hadn’t failed to see Jinglan—he had deliberately grown cold toward him then. When a favored son of heaven received such cold treatment, he easily went astray…

I couldn’t help saying: “…Why didn’t you tell me then? Why did you secretly arrange for Cai Mi to elope in my place without telling me about big brother’s parentage?”

Jinglan hesitated in the darkness, then glanced aside indifferently: “What would telling you accomplish? If you learned your beloved was a former dynasty prince, it would only cause you needless pain…”

He only wanted to protect his little sister.

I bit my lip without speaking, only hearing him say quietly: “Later… father strongly opposed my marriage to Qi Luo, even making me choose between her and the Crown Prince position in front of her… My heart grew cold. I felt this imperial throne meant nothing. Since father wanted me to leave, I would leave. As long as Qi Luo could be with me… Ha, thinking now, father was so angry only because I had pursued his biological son. He stripped my imperial status only to legitimately pass the Crown Prince position to Jingyan.”

Jinglan asked me: “Ultimately, was I the one who didn’t treat him as father, or was he the one who didn’t treat me as his son?”

I couldn’t refute this point at all. Seeing me speechless, he smiled again: “Do you think I returned because I regretted it, because I renewed my longing for the imperial position? Do you know how much suffering Qi Luo endured with me in those years? Though I had learning, in the common world I faced obstacles everywhere. While we weren’t reduced to missing meals, we still struggled constantly for livelihood… But even so, I never thought of returning to my former position…”

“Then… why…”

“Until Qi Luo fell seriously ill.” Jinglan took a deep breath: “I sold everything I owned but couldn’t afford her treatment. Desperate, I thought to return and beg father, so I brought Qi Luo to the capital and had old court friends tell father my purpose, but was refused entry. I could only wait, until the third day when he finally sent someone with five hundred taels of silver to dismiss me… But that night, Qi Luo… couldn’t hold on…” His hands trembled slightly. “If… if he had agreed to see me earlier, or just let palace physicians treat Qi Luo earlier, she wouldn’t have died! It was him! He killed Qi Luo!”

The lamp on the table flickered. I felt a chill. Jinglan said: “From then on, I finally understood—without power in hand, you can do nothing at all, can’t even… protect the person you love most…”

My heart trembled slightly. He said: “You’re different from me. When you eloped with Song Langsheng, father still paved the way for you, with money, with noble assistance, able to buy a house anytime and live comfortably…”

I looked at him in shock: “You… you knew where we were?”

“Using so many connections, how could I not find out…” He mocked himself: “You wanted to live quietly, and why would I disturb you… I thought at least you wouldn’t stop me…”

I gripped my clothes tightly: “Elder brother, the Wanghun San you used on me back then didn’t kill me, showing you still considered me your sister. But why did you want to kill Jingyan… he after all—”

“Some things, once done, are done. What’s the point of discussing this now?” Jinglan carelessly interrupted my words. “Do you think I’m telling you all this to gain your sympathy? No, I only regret having hesitation then, whether toward you or Jingyan. In the end, I still lost to that so-called moment of mercy!” He glanced up at me slightly: “Having said this much, do you think I would tell you where the Empress Dowager is hidden?”

I was silent for a long time: “You’ve always been cautious, never easily trusting others. How could you confidently entrust the Empress Dowager to outsiders’ care? During Jingyan’s serious illness, you rarely left the palace. The Empress Dowager is mostly confined somewhere in the palace. I don’t believe searching the entire imperial palace won’t reveal any clues.” I slowly stood, watching his face gradually pale: “I didn’t come to discover the Empress Dowager’s whereabouts. I only came seeking an answer.”

Seeing me about to leave, he stepped forward: “If the Empress Dowager safely returns, do you think she’ll let you live peacefully in this world?”

He dragged the chains on his legs, placing both hands on the wooden bars, eyes cold: “Father is gone, Jingyan is gone, even your princess status no longer exists… You know clearly in your heart—at this point, if you can’t be selfish once, you and he will have no hope in this life…”

I hadn’t expected him to suddenly speak of this, my heart suddenly emptying: “You…”

His dark pupils reflected the dancing candlelight: “I lost, but I didn’t lose to Jingyan, nor to father, much less to Song Langsheng. I lost to Heaven—Heaven gave me such a predetermined fate from birth. You’re the same… little sister.”

He called me little sister.

I felt my shoulders trembling slightly.

I thought this was fate’s terrible aspect—if elder brother had truly been father’s biological son, perhaps everyone’s ending today would have been very, very good.

“Rest early…” With tears misting my eyes, as I turned to leave, I heard my own low voice: “Thank you. Elder brother.”

The next day, the Court Minister came to tell me triumphantly that the Empress Dowager had indeed been hidden in Jingfu Palace’s cellar. Though unconscious for two days, the imperial physicians said there was no danger to her life. With proper rest, she would recover soon.

I smiled: “That’s excellent. You can be promoted again.”

He scratched his head embarrassedly: “It was thanks to your reminder… but you wouldn’t let me tell them…”

Whether I told or not made no difference.

Speaking up would at most add a merit to commute my death sentence to life imprisonment. Better to give the opportunity to a promising young man—it would repay his kindness for all those delicious meals.

I had gotten along well with this young fellow and planned to bid him proper farewell before leaving. But that very night, a group of mysterious people silently took me out of the Court of Judicial Review.

Generally, those who could remove a death row prisoner from prison were either staging a jailbreak or abusing power for personal gain. Considering a jailbreak couldn’t be completely silent, by the time these people confusedly put me in a carriage, I could basically determine whose handiwork this was.

When the carriage slowly stopped and I lifted the curtain to see the residence before me, suddenly I felt a sense of things having changed.

Princess Xiangyi’s Mansion.

The people from the carriage didn’t follow up. I pushed open the mansion gates, my palm touching a layer of thin dust. I thought if Liu Bo were still here, he would never tolerate the grand princess mansion’s gates not being polished bright and clean.

The night was cold and bone-chilling. I slowly walked into the mansion. Once this place had been full of flowers, with roses and crabapple blossoms filling the courtyard. Now only a solitary lake remained, cold moonlight rippling on the waves, all former pride and prosperity buried in silence.

Life’s changes were so infinite. I inexplicably remembered that year when I knocked him unconscious and dragged him into the palace, arrogantly telling him: “The rice is cooked and the wood is carved, Song Langsheng. You must be this prince consort whether you want to or not.”

At that time, the sky was high and clouds vast, flowers in full bloom, and we were both innocent and fearless.

Blue stones formed a path under the steps, leading along corridors toward the inner courtyard. On this path we once took daily returning to our chambers, green vines now spread and hung down—newly planted after the mansion was later damaged.

When the prince consort went to war, I still didn’t know my own parentage and only thought to plant them well so he could see this vigorous life when he returned home.

I never expected we would never return again.

Walking along, I stopped, my gaze falling on the green tree at the path’s end.

Silver moonlight scattered down. Under the tree stood that all-too-familiar silhouette, yet at this moment, it felt utterly strange.

Song Langsheng heard footsteps and turned around abruptly. Before I could react, my body suddenly tightened as he pulled me forcefully into his embrace.

The warm breath remained the same, the embrace the same, still making one sink deep, become intoxicated, beyond redemption.

In the cool breeze mixed with grass and wood scents came his hoarse voice: “I shouldn’t have left you alone in prison so long.”

Tears burst from my eyes. I had held back too long, almost unable to stop them. I couldn’t speak. Thinking I was still angry with him, he wanted to wipe my tears but stopped midway: “A’Tang, what I said in Yanfu Palace… wasn’t…”

“I know. If you hadn’t made this deal with Jinglan, how could he have let you enter the palace? If you hadn’t entered the palace, how could you have saved the situation? If you hadn’t gone with the flow, how could I now safely meet with you?” I cut off his words, looking up and wiping my tears: “Look, I’m so clever—how could I misunderstand you over such things?”

“A’Tang… I…”

I asked: “That year, when you rescued me from the fire at Chen Family Village, after we returned to the palace we got along very well, but soon after you distanced yourself from me. No matter how I questioned you, you ignored me. You knelt all night before father’s sleeping chambers, and when I wanted to accompany you, you abandoned me and left. Was it then that you learned everything?”

Song Langsheng was silent for a moment: “At that time, the Emp… father saw I was unwilling to cooperate in infiltrating former dynasty associates. In anger, he told me about your and my parentage… He told me my true identity was a Daqing prince, not a former dynasty heir at all… I found it hard to accept then. He gave me a second choice—if I remained stubborn, he would make both our parentages public. I…”

So no matter how I pleaded or misunderstood, he was unwilling to give any explanation.

He bore everything, concealed everything, only hoping I could always live carefree as that Xiangyi—father’s beloved daughter, the princess held high in all people’s eyes, never needing to know this cruel truth.

But how many things in this world truly go as one wishes?

I asked: “The imperial edict in the golden hall—did you know about it beforehand too?”

He nodded gently: “He was always worried about Jingyan’s condition. If something happened, he hoped I could turn the tide…”

I looked up at him: “Why did you never mention any of this to me?”

He paused: “At that time, Jingyan’s physical condition was better than imagined. In managing military intelligence and handling court politics, he was even more thoughtfully comprehensive. I knew he could bear this responsibility, so I felt at ease choosing to leave with you…”

I murmured, interrupting his words: “If you had told me then, I would never have been willful enough to make you take me away from the military camp… You know me—I’ve never been someone who disregards the bigger picture…”

Song Langsheng looked at me quietly. His eyes, even in such darkness, remained clear: “You’ve always been wronging yourself… A’Tang, I only want to see you live freely, unbound by anything…”

My heart trembled.

Unbound by anything—what a beautiful wish.

But suffering exists everywhere in the mortal world. Who can truly live recklessly? When I didn’t know the truth, I could still live as I pleased among common people. But could Song Langsheng then truly lay down everything and pick chrysanthemums by the eastern fence with a clear conscience?

If that were truly the case, how could he have easily left Guangling’s prison and rushed back to the capital?

I said nothing, and Song Langsheng didn’t continue. It was very quiet around us. I glanced around and asked: “Bringing me out of prison in the dead of night, I suppose there’s already another ‘Xiao Qitang’ in the cell taking my place?”

He was slightly stunned, then nodded: “I couldn’t bear to see you continue suffering in prison. For now, I can only do this, but if you give me more time, I’ll find a way to pardon you.”

I shook my head: “During my years holding power, all those people father couldn’t legitimately protect or wanted to kill—which one didn’t have evidence fabricated through my hands to achieve the goal? Even then, impeachment memorials in court never ceased. Most of the several elders in court could probably guess those matters had inseparable connections to father. How could they truly bring it into the open? When the wall falls, everyone pushes. Not to mention old grudges—with each new emperor comes new officials. We’ve changed to the third generation now. Can you see any major changes between current important court officials and those from father’s time? These clan factions have long been bound together. They wouldn’t let Jingyan shake them, and naturally won’t willingly let you challenge them either. This so-called making an example of me—on the surface they’re dealing with me, but actually they’re testing you. If you truly disregard their factional alliance power and insist on clearing my name, then next you could completely shake their foundation. Would they allow such an emperor? Your parentage still has gaps to exploit, you have no connections in court, and at least before you completely control military power, you absolutely cannot risk this for me again. Otherwise, you can’t save me, and you’ll be in danger yourself.”

His expression didn’t change much, but his voice was terribly hoarse: “How could I not know what you’re saying? But I cannot watch you suffer and do nothing—”

I lowered my head, my heart bitter beyond words: “How can you say you did nothing? At least you safely rescued me. Once the ‘Xiao Qitang’ in prison dies, no one will trouble me again…”

He gripped my hand tightly, his eyes full of pain: “A’Tang, you want to leave. I know you want to leave…”

My arm hurt from his grip, but I couldn’t break free. He was afraid of losing me, and wasn’t I the same? My mind was chaotic, only hearing my own voice: “Then what should I do? Stay here, hide in a corner of the capital, disguised as someone else daily? Worry during the day about being exposed, then hope for you to leave the palace for secret meetings at midnight, watching you from outside the palace as you marry consorts and have children, spending my life sneaking around like this? Song Langsheng, is this the kind of companionship you want?”

My body was tightly held by him again, almost suffocating me. He said in a trembling voice: “What nonsense are you saying? How could I possibly marry someone else? In this lifetime, I’ve only loved you. In this lifetime, you are my only wife.”

My heart ached terribly. In the past, hearing such a deep and passionate confession would have filled me with joy, but at this moment, every word was like sharp needles stabbing densely into my heart—painful to the core, yet leaving no trace.

I didn’t continue arguing with him about “what consequences an emperor would face if he didn’t marry consorts and establish an empress.” He was extremely intelligent, far more strategic than I. What I could think of, how could he not have considered?

Perhaps I was too hasty, eager to bring things to a conclusion. Perhaps we both needed to slow down, give each other time to calm down, to avoid making choices we’d regret forever.

I heard the night watchman’s call in the distance—it was past the fourth watch. If Song Langsheng didn’t return to the palace now, it would only create unnecessary complications. He seemed to have countless more things to instruct. Knowing what he was thinking, I said: “I won’t leave without a word. Rest assured, I’ll wait for you.”

After Song Langsheng hurriedly left, his secret guards took me to settle in a village town in the capital’s suburbs.

It was indeed a remote and peaceful place. The small bamboo dwelling was surrounded by shrubs and woods, with green mountains to the north and an emerald lake to the south. The courtyard even raised several chickens. The lead guard told me they lived next door to my next door’s next door, and if I had any needs—like wanting to eat something, wanting to play something, or wanting to write a love letter to send to His Majesty—they could arrange it all.

After expressing deep sympathy for the secret guard profession, I entered the thatched cottage, planning to wash my face and sleep first.

I thought it was empty inside.

I didn’t expect to push the door open and see a woman lying on the bed in the outer room.

Qinggu, Lin Danqing, my birth mother.

I hadn’t expected Song Langsheng to have rescued my mother too. Even more unexpected was that he hadn’t breathed a word to me about rescuing her.

His later explanation for this was that he wanted to give me a surprise.

So I appeared so suddenly before Qinggu, and when she heard movement and opened her eyes, her whole body trembled.

The two of us looked at each other without words, only tears streaming.

Sometimes I think if father and the Empress Dowager had faced their fertility problems honestly back then, now I would probably be an ordinary doctor’s daughter, and Song Langsheng, as long as he wasn’t eliminated by other brothers, would still be destined to be a revered emperor.

I asked my mother why she had never come to find me all these years—at least during that time in Chen Family Village, she could have told me the truth.

She said the truth was far less important than my happiness.

Perhaps there truly is predestination. After going in such a big circle, we still returned to the starting point.

But everyone’s heart was already wounded beyond recognition. No one could accept this original ending.

Including my mother.

Just five days after meeting me, she left a letter and departed.

Early that morning, I woke to see still-warm food and a letter on the table. Without even opening it, I rushed out of the farmhouse, calling the secret guards to split up and search for my mother.

She truly came and went without a trace. When I rode my horse to the mountain heights hoping to see which path she had taken, I saw only vast fog.

I couldn’t understand how, after being separated for so long, when we finally reunited, she could bear to abandon me and leave again.

Her injuries from torture hadn’t fully healed, the residual poison from drugs hadn’t completely cleared. Going off alone like this, where could she go?

I unfolded the letter. When the mist in my eyes became tears and dripped down, the characters on the paper gradually became clear:

Mother is leaving.

Don’t be angry about this departure without farewell, and don’t worry about me. Mother is her own best doctor and can take care of herself.

As for you, remember to sleep and eat on time. Don’t be willful anymore. If not for yourself, think of the child in your womb.

Don’t waste energy searching for me. Mother has been wandering all her life, unwilling to burden you again and again, and unwilling for you to abandon your most precious person because of me.

Someday we will meet again.

Take care. Don’t think of me.

I struggled through the letter three times, reading for a long while before realizing what “child in your womb” meant.

Suddenly I remembered yesterday when I wouldn’t get up or eat, she forcibly pulled me up and held my wrist for a full tea-time, staring blankly. When I asked what was wrong, she pondered for ages without saying a word.

So I too was about to become a mother.