“Must we talk about this on Christmas Eve?” Zang Yao looked at Luan Nian. “You know this might ruin every Christmas for the rest of my life.”

“What did you mean when you just said that at the beginning, neither of us wanted to be friends? I don’t remember expressing any special feelings toward you.” Luan Nian suddenly recalled what Zhang Xin had said—that he was cold-blooded, that he wasn’t human.

Zang Yao nodded. “Then I misunderstood.” She felt a bit sad. She had always thought she was different from Luan Nian; no matter where she moved, he would always come to see her. Luan Nian was one of her few old friends who knew all her stories.

“If I’ve hurt you, I’m sorry.”

Zang Yao smiled and shook her head. “Don’t. You’re Luan Nian, and Luan Nian never admits he’s wrong. Besides, it’s not your fault.”

“I regret it.”

Zang Yao shrugged. “Cheer up~ I still have to move when I get back. I plan to stay in Beijing for a while, and then… I want to go to Yinchuan.”

“Have I ruined every Christmas for the rest of your life?” Luan Nian asked her.

“Not that bad.” Zang Yao smiled at him, but she felt incredibly sad inside. Luan Nian was her last bit of hope for men. She had always known that she truly loved him; she just didn’t dare admit it.

Shang Zhitao was experiencing torment.

She was still young and didn’t know how to hide her feelings for someone, nor did she understand longing. She stared at her phone all day, hoping to see even a few words from Luan Nian. She humbly hoped that during his happy holiday, he might occasionally remember her, this “bed partner.”

Even if he just asked how her work was going, as he had before. But Luan Nian didn’t.

It wasn’t until Christmas evening that she remembered Luan Nian had asked her to take care of his fish. That red dragon fish—during her previous two visits, Shang Zhitao had secretly named it Little Red Flag.

“But I don’t have a key,” she messaged Luan Nian.

“In the garden, on that tree, inside the Christmas decoration tied to it.”

“Okay.”

Shang Zhitao put on her down jacket and went out, moving through the Christmas evening. The world was truly lively, making her heart feel increasingly vivid, wanting to participate in this liveliness. But Yao Bei was on a business trip, Sun Yu had a Christmas social event, and Lu Mi was definitely soaking in a nightclub—she didn’t know who to play with.

When she arrived at Luan Nian’s house, she found that his yard gate wasn’t locked. Luan Nian was confident in his neighborhood’s security. She pushed the door open and went in, seeing a red ball tied to the tree in his courtyard. Luan Nian had perfunctorily decorated his tree.

Shang Zhitao took down the red ball and removed the key from inside, then opened the door and went in. After turning on the lights, she saw Little Red swimming in the huge fish tank. Shang Zhitao didn’t know how to take care of fish; she couldn’t even take good care of herself, so how could she take care of a fish?

“Luke, may I ask how I should take care of your fish?”

Luan Nian’s call came quickly. Shang Zhitao hurriedly answered and heard Luan Nian say, “Help me change the filter cotton in the fish tank. The filter cotton is in the storage cabinet in the kitchen. Then check the water temperature and feed it a little fish food.”

“Oh.”

Shang Zhitao ran to the kitchen to find the filter cotton, putting the phone aside, making a racket as she fumbled around. Luan Nian didn’t rush her. After she found the filter cotton, he taught her how to change it, how to check the water temperature, and how to feed the fish. After a long time struggling, Shang Zhitao finally finished taking care of Little Red. “It’s all done. I’ll go now. Should I hang the key back on the tree?”

…

“Take the key with you. Just give it to me when I return. Also, there’s a shopping bag on the sofa with a gift for you. Merry Christmas.” Luan Nian hung up.

Shang Zhitao was stunned. She had a Christmas gift, too?

On the sofa was a square shopping bag with a logo Shang Zhitao recognized—another expensive bag, her Christmas gift.

Shang Zhitao felt a bit dazed. This was the second bag she had received from Luan Nian in a short time. She felt the payment for sleeping with Luan Nian was too generous. Having a Christmas gift should have been joyful, but she wasn’t. She would have preferred if Luan Nian had given her an apple like Sun Yuanzhu did, or even a flower—anything would have been better than a bag.

“Luke gave me another bag, saying it’s a Christmas gift,” she messaged Sun Yu.

Sun Yu saw it and replied, “Keep it.”

Sun Yu was very practical. Sex partners weren’t eternal, but money could solve big problems. It wasn’t like stealing or robbing—what was wrong with accepting a bag from a man?

“Keep it, and then come play at my place.”

“Okay.”

The fantasy about love in Shang Zhitao’s heart kept working its mischief. She expected more from Luan Nian, but then thought she was overthinking. She was just over twenty, her thoughts weren’t mature, swaying back and forth, then feeling that love wasn’t important—just going round and round like this.

“Thank you for your Christmas gift. It’s too expensive. I didn’t prepare a gift for you.”

“I don’t need one.”

“Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas.”

Shang Zhitao suddenly wondered if that girl with Luan Nian in Hokkaido knew of her existence. Did she know that the man she liked had a regular sex partner in Beijing? Would she care if she knew? Or was she like herself, knowing it clearly but unable to mind? Shang Zhitao felt she had no self-respect. She kept thinking all the way home, until finally morality won out.

“That day you said that if either of us has a new partner, we can propose to terminate the relationship.”

Luan Nian was drinking with a group of friends when he saw this message from Shang Zhitao and frowned. “What? Got a new flame?”

“…I don’t.”

“Then what do you mean? Be direct.” Luan Nian hated when people beat around the bush and wasted time. He wasn’t willing to guess other people’s thoughts.

“I mean, if you have someone else, please inform me as well. I don’t want to be morally condemned.” After typing this, Shang Zhitao took a deep breath, but her heart sank when she saw Luan Nian’s reply.

He said, “Do sex friends need moral constraints?”

“There could be disease transmission.”

“Use protection.” Luan Nian was butting heads with Shang Zhitao. He didn’t like discussing this nonsensical topic with her. Shang Zhitao was clearly saying he was promiscuous.

“So do you have other partners?” Today was Christmas, but Shang Zhitao was having a terrible time. Luan Nian had ruined her holiday. He wasn’t with her, yet he easily influenced her with his attitude. Her rare bit of stubbornness emerged again, making her want to clarify things with Luan Nian. Even as sex partners, it should be one-to-one; she didn’t accept promiscuity. Had she become so humble?

“Yes, what about it?” Luan Nian put down his sake cup and said to everyone, “You eat first, I have something to attend to.” He found a quiet place and leaned against it, focusing on chatting with Shang Zhitao. But not for long—Shang Zhitao showed her determination and courage.

“Then I want to terminate our relationship.”

“Fine.”

Luan Nian replied crisply, then put his phone in his pocket and went back in to drink. Luan Nian’s mood suddenly turned sour. He sat drinking sake with his friends but was filled with anger. To him, Shang Zhitao was just a bed partner—it didn’t matter whether she was there or not; he didn’t need to force it. Moreover, he was well aware of Shang Zhitao’s feelings for him and knew how to handle them. It wasn’t difficult. But he was still angry.

When Shang Zhitao saw that “Fine,” she completely understood Luan Nian’s attitude toward her. In his heart, she was insignificant, just a boring pastime. Whether she was there or not didn’t matter.

She felt a bit like crying, but couldn’t cry. She brought the bag home and put it together with the one from last time, both still in their original packaging, brand new. She didn’t even know what the bags looked like, just piled them there. Her dislike for luxury goods was confirmed from that moment—luxury goods made her sad, as they spelled out the distance between her and Luan Nian.

She rarely put on makeup, but she did to attend Sun Yu’s event. Christmas was truly lively, with single people gathering for eight-minute dating sessions. By the time Shang Zhitao arrived, Sun Yu had already explained the rules, and everyone was preparing their self-introductions.

Sun Yu came up to her ear and whispered, “See that man in the blue shirt? He’s back from Silicon Valley, works in testing, has published several books, owns a house and a car.”

“I’m just here to help you make up the numbers,” Shang Zhitao told Sun Yu.

“No,” Sun Yu shook her head. “Shang Zhitao, you’re here to find your other half.”

“Okay.” Shang Zhitao didn’t feel any pressure now. She had ended her relationship with Luan Nian; she was completely single now. “Is that him? Who else has good conditions?”

“The one in the gray sweater is also good.”

“Alright. I’ll go then.”

Shang Zhitao had never participated in such activities before. The experience was fresh—strangers facing each other, engaging in eight minutes of conversation, then moving on to the next person. She sat up straight, seriously answering the questions from the man opposite her. The questions were bizarre. One bespectacled man asked Shang Zhitao if she accepted “DINK” (Double Income, No Kids). Shang Zhitao didn’t even know what DINK was, but readily answered, “I accept, I accept.”

There was also a man with an 80-20 hairstyle who asked her, “What’s your understanding of soulmates?”

“Huh?” Shang Zhitao had never thought about it. Her face showed clearly that she didn’t know, and the man disappointedly pouted.

Finally, it was the turn of the Silicon Valley elite. Shang Zhitao sat across from him and smiled obediently. “Hello.”

The elite didn’t even look up. “Introduce yourself—name, age, birthplace, alma mater, current occupation, and financial situation.”

It was like a job interview. But Shang Zhitao still answered seriously—she was there to support Sun Yu. Her attitude was extremely proper. The man finally looked at her directly. “What’s your number?”

“What?”

“Your number? For voting later. I’ll vote for you. I’m number six.”

“Oh, oh, I’m number five.”

Shang Zhitao carefully noted the man’s number and wrote down six when voting. Number six was undoubtedly the king of charm, while Shang Zhitao received only one vote.

Sun Yu said, “After the event ends, we’ll introduce friends who voted for each other.”

When the event ended, Shang Zhitao asked Sun Yu, “Give me the Silicon Valley elite’s phone number. We agreed to vote for each other.”

Sun Yu laughed so hard she couldn’t straighten up. “Only you, big fool, would believe someone saying they’d vote for you! He voted for that woman with the bare shoulders.”

“Damn. So insincere.” Shang Zhitao also laughed out loud. While helping Sun Yu clean up, she asked, “Did that bare-shouldered woman vote for him?”

“That bare-shouldered woman voted for a girl.”

“What?” Shang Zhitao opened her mouth wide. “Huh?”

“Don’t understand, do you?” Sun Yu pinched her face. “Do you even know how much more complex society is than you imagine?”

“It is quite complex.” Shang Zhitao felt a bit humbled. After they finished cleaning up, they both collapsed there, exhausted. After a long while, they finally got up, supporting each other. “Let’s go, good friend. Merry Christmas.”

Merry Christmas.

Shang Zhitao looked at the snow on the street and inexplicably said these words.