After realizing this, both were greatly shocked in their hearts. Pei Wenxuan’s face remained impassive as he lowered his head to look at the chessboard, holding a chess piece between his fingers, feigning contemplation. Meanwhile, Li Rong raised her eyes, picking up her tea to drink while secretly observing him.
Pei Wenxuan thought through Li Rong’s behavior from beginning to end. Though Li Rong appeared spoiled, she actually acted with great method. She wouldn’t trouble people without reason. What looked like unreasonable behavior was often just her finding ways to punish someone. But this was only his first meeting with Li Rong—what exactly had she found disagreeable about him that she would toy with him like this?
But if all this was premised on Li Rong, like him, also being reborn, then it made far more sense.
If Li Rong was now reborn, it must be because his subordinates had succeeded. With Li Rong’s intelligence, before dying she must have guessed he was behind it. Facing the enemy who killed her, the fact that she could restrain herself from finishing him off could already be considered mercy outside the law, a bodhisattva’s compassion. Toying with him was just to vent her anger. As for whether she still wanted to marry him—that was an unknown.
After all, in the previous life…
Pei Wenxuan’s heart sank. Li Rong and Su Rongqing should have had mutual affection for each other.
Pei Wenxuan’s thoughts churned in his mind, but his face showed nothing as he placed his chess piece, pretending to contemplate.
Li Rong secretly observed Pei Wenxuan’s expression. Seeing his composed demeanor, she began to wonder as well.
She remembered the twenty-year-old Pei Wenxuan had still carried some youthful inexperience, and knowing his circumstances clearly, his temper had been much better. When he first met her back then, though his face remained relatively calm, his eyes had already shown some panic.
After all, meeting one’s future wife, who was also a princess—no matter what, there should be some emotion.
But the current Pei Wenxuan not only showed no emotion? He simply treated her like an old acquaintance! That’s why he dared to challenge and confront her like this, making moves right under her nose, calculating against all three other men.
This Pei Wenxuan was too strange. But if he, like herself, was also reborn, then it made perfect sense.
In an instant, both harbored suspicions, and moreover, these suspicions were practically nine-tenths certainty. But both were habitually cautious people. Having suspicions required verification. Furthermore, if the other was also reborn, whether to let them know you were also reborn became something that needed consideration.
So neither spoke, both feigning composure, acting casual and indifferent.
The two played with their thoughts for a while, a strange silence permeating around them. Jing Mei and Jing Lan stood at a distance. Jing Mei whispered softly, “You said the Princess doesn’t like Young Master Pei, but I think the two get along very well.”
“The Princess’s thoughts…” Jing Lan sighed. “Are becoming harder and harder to fathom.”
Halfway through the game, both had calmed their inner shock. Once their emotions settled, they had to consider what to do next if the other was indeed reborn.
Rain fell outside the courtyard, droplets landing in the pond, creating ripples.
The sounds of falling chess pieces and rain intertwined. Li Rong was first to speak, saying slowly, “Young Master Pei wants to marry me. Have you thought about what life would be like after marrying me?”
“I…” Pei Wenxuan hesitated, finally saying, “I will treat the Princess well.”
He would treat her well, because in his previous life, that’s what he had done.
He would try to understand this person, work hard to approach her, make her happy.
Back then, Li Rong had liked him wearing white clothes, so after marriage, aside from his official robes, he wore white clothing for many years. Until one day he heard that Li Rong had once said, “With Rongqing in white, there are no immortals in the world.”
The dishes Li Rong liked to eat—he learned them all, having her taste them again and again, eventually becoming her personal chef. No one understood her tastes better than him. Until one day, Su Rongqing began learning to cook.
Li Rong’s legs got cold, hurting when the weather was cold. He learned massage, acupressure, and acupuncture. Every time it rained or was cold, he would massage her legs, continuing until she felt comfortable and fell asleep. Until one day, when they fought too fiercely, Li Rong told him, “I don’t need you. I have someone else.”
Remembering these things, Pei Wenxuan felt somewhat uncomfortable in his heart. But when Li Rong asked, he could still only say that these things, he would still do a second time.
Only in this moment of response, he had some hesitation.
Already knowing the ending, should he try a second time?
Between them, it hadn’t been a good ending—walking together half a lifetime, fighting to the death. Most of their lives seemed to have been wasted.
Li Rong heard the hesitation in his words, knowing he was actually uncertain. She lowered her head to look at the chessboard, saying slowly, “I believe the Young Master will treat me well. But, will the Young Master like me?”
Hearing this, Pei Wenxuan lowered his eyes.
Li Rong raised her eyes to look at him, watching him seriously. “Will the Young Master regard me as a wife, or as an ally?”
Pei Wenxuan remained silent. Outside, the rain pattered steadily. Li Rong looked at the crisscrossing lines on the chessboard, seeming to suddenly lose interest. She tossed her chess piece into the box, leaned back against her chair, turned to look at the lotus leaves swaying under the rain in the courtyard, and said slowly, “I’ve thought about it. If I were together with the Young Master, for this entire lifetime, I probably would never have a husband—I would only have an ally.”
“In the inner court, husbands and family actually aren’t that important. What’s important is the power held in one’s hands. But when a person walks to the pinnacle, walking alone in this world, one envies the bustling warmth of ordinary life.”
With that, Li Rong turned to look at him, laughing lightly. “Tell me, what’s the difference between being alone at the top and being a lonely wandering ghost?”
Pei Wenxuan didn’t speak. Everything Li Rong said, he understood. He quietly watched Li Rong. An eighteen-year-old girl should be at her most radiant, but in her languid reclining posture, in every gesture and movement, she displayed a desolation and loneliness beyond her years. She was like a gorgeous ghost wandering in the world—beautiful yet utterly alone. Just watching her made one’s heart tighten.
Seeing Pei Wenxuan’s silence, Li Rong laughed softly. She thought that if Pei Wenxuan was also reborn, he would know what she was talking about.
Pei Wenxuan indeed knew, but didn’t know how to respond. Jing Lan walked in from not far away, holding an umbrella, saying softly to Li Rong, “Princess, it’s raining heavily. The palace eunuch says the time is about right now—the banquet can be dismissed.”
“Mm.” Li Rong nodded, then said, “Say I’m not feeling well. You go see the guests off.”
Jing Lan acknowledged and withdrew. Once Jing Lan left, Li Rong turned to look at Pei Wenxuan kneeling across from her, saying gently, “Does Young Master Pei think I should marry you and live such a life?”
She was seriously consulting Pei Wenxuan.
Though Pei Wenxuan had quarreled with her for many years, even killing her in the end, Pei Wenxuan had one good quality.
He never lied to her.
Good or bad, whether this life should be lived—she felt that the answer Pei Wenxuan gave her would certainly be true.
But after she finished asking this question, Pei Wenxuan only raised his eyes, quietly watching her.
Her smile couldn’t reach her eyes.
Just like in the previous life over decades, the appearance he’d seen of her. This kind of smile was completely different from the truly eighteen-year-old Li Rong in his memories.
The eighteen-year-old Li Rong had been wonderful.
Even unwilling to admit it, Pei Wenxuan still remembered that actually, at the very beginning of this marriage, when he lifted Li Rong’s bridal veil and saw the girl look up at him with both shyness and curiosity, then when drinking the nuptial cup she said crisply to him, “Wenxuan, regardless of why we’re together, since we’ve become husband and wife, I still want to spend a lifetime with you”—at that time, he had also seriously considered living well with Li Rong. They would have children, would accompany each other for a lifetime.
Until Li Rong learned he liked Qin Zhenzhen.
Actually, he himself didn’t know whether his feelings for Qin Zhenzhen counted as love or responsibility. They’d grown up together since childhood. He’d always kept this person in his heart. He’d hoped to spend a lifetime with Qin Zhenzhen, but couldn’t.
Later, Qin Zhenzhen married Li Rong’s younger brother, Crown Prince Li Chuan.
As Crown Prince, Li Chuan was a good crown prince, but not a good husband. Due to political marriage alliances, while still Crown Prince, he already had a total of five women—his principal consort plus concubines. Qin Zhenzhen had an upright temperament and didn’t understand palace schemes. She married into the Eastern Palace through family alliance. In the Eastern Palace, without his help, she would have long died in conspiracies and plots.
When he helped her, Li Rong naturally knew. At first, she said nothing. Later, at a palace banquet, when he once again secretly helped Qin Zhenzhen out of trouble, he nearly exposed himself. Li Rong had no choice but to step in and help him cover up.
On the way home that day, they sat in the carriage. Li Rong said nothing. His heart was somewhat panicked at the time. He wanted to explain, yet didn’t know what to explain, only feeling that no matter what Li Rong said, it would be justified.
Then Li Rong returned home. Only after entering the bedroom door did she walk to the table, pour herself tea, and with her back to him, ask one question: “You like her?”
Pei Wenxuan stood at the door. He actually wanted to say no, but felt he couldn’t lie, so he could only tell the truth: “I cannot let her go.”
“What’s your relationship with her?”
Li Rong held her teacup, looking especially calm. Pei Wenxuan still told the truth. They had an arranged marriage from childhood. They were childhood sweethearts. His family fell into decline. The Qin family broke off the engagement. Qin Zhenzhen was forced to marry into the Eastern Palace…
“I only want to help her,” he said hoarsely. “Nothing more. She’s the Crown Prince’s consort. I won’t do anything.”
After he finished speaking, Li Rong didn’t say anything for a long time. Silence became Pei Wenxuan’s deepest impression of that night.
He watched as Li Rong kept drinking water, cup after cup. After a long time, Li Rong seemed to finally recover. She turned to look at him, asking only: “Will you betray me?”
“No.” He answered immediately, watching her. “You are my wife.”
“I am not your wife.”
Li Rong looked at him, her expression serious. “I am only your ally.”
These words stunned Pei Wenxuan. Li Rong turned her head to look out the window, saying calmly, “This arranged marriage—actually, neither of us had a choice. We’re both doing this for power. Actually, speaking of it, there are no romantic feelings. You have someone in your heart, and I have someone in my heart. It’s just that we didn’t speak clearly before, causing some misunderstanding. Now that we’ve spoken clearly, it’s nothing.”
“It’s not a big deal,” Li Rong smiled, her eyes seeming ready to cry at any moment. “Why didn’t you say so earlier?”
Pei Wenxuan stared at her blankly. He wanted to deny it, yet felt that what Li Rong said didn’t seem wrong either. His feelings for Li Rong weren’t romantic love, because a person couldn’t love two people simultaneously. With Qin Zhenzhen in his heart, how could there be room for Li Rong?
Seeing he didn’t speak, Li Rong lowered her head, saying gently, “Having spoken clearly, there’s nothing more. From now on, we’ll continue as before. I just hope Minister Pei understands in his heart.”
“I am not your wife. You are not my husband. I don’t care who lives in your heart, and you don’t care who I’m with. You have your life, I have mine. Each finds their own pleasures.”
“I only ask Minister Pei to promise me,” Li Rong stared at him, her gaze sharp as an eagle’s, “Since you and I are allies, we absolutely must not betray each other.”
That night, it had also rained.
Just like this very moment, heavy rain pouring down.
Li Rong walked before him, staring at him, saying only: “Pei Wenxuan, speak.”
He couldn’t speak.
Seeing his hesitation, Li Rong smiled. “Pei Wenxuan, if you don’t speak, I’ll take it that you have feelings for me. But if we talk about feelings between us, then everything you’ve done is truly disgusting. We shouldn’t be together. I’ll go petition Father Emperor right now. No matter what,” her expression was calm, “we must divorce.”
Thunder rumbled loudly. Pei Wenxuan looked at Li Rong looking up at him.
In that moment, he finally clearly understood just how unyielding this woman’s demands were regarding feelings. Even if it meant mutual destruction, she wanted something clean and pure.
So he smiled.
“Why bother?” he said with difficulty. “You’re right. We are allies. I have someone else in my heart, and I shouldn’t control you either. Divorce isn’t good for either of us. Let’s leave it at this?”
“Bearing the title of husband and wife, living our separate lives, you and I together as allies, absolutely not betraying each other.”
“If we violate this vow,” Pei Wenxuan said hoarsely, Li Rong smiled, “may we die terrible deaths.”
Yet ultimately, they still violated their own vow, and in the end fulfilled this vow as well.