After finishing the hotpot it was already close to midnight. We’d all drunk a bit, and I went outside first to call cars for everyone.

“Dongxue, you’re too polite, we can get our own cabs,” Qian Langfeng’s wife kept saying.

“It’s the same whoever calls them. It’s so cold, not freezing is what’s most important.” I smiled. “Today was so-so, but next time I’ll be the host and treat Brother Feng and sister-in-law to a Northeast meal.”

The cars came one after another. Fang Qiang was a bit drunk and pulled on my arm. “Dongxue, where do you live? I… I’ll send you home first!”

I said, “I live at Yuxin Garden, it’s especially far.”

Fang Qiang said, “Why live there! The rent must be so expensive!”

I smiled and said, “I don’t know, I bought it.”

Then I calmly pulled his hand away and stuffed him into the car.

“Impressive, Yuxin Garden is all large units—” Fang Qiang’s drunken voice grew more and more distant.

I turned back and saw Cheng Xia. He was obediently standing in place, burying his face in his coat.

I was a bit surprised and said, “Didn’t your car arrive ages ago?”

“I sent it away.” He said, “Walk for a bit?”

I hesitated.

A long time ago, every time after eating I would pester him to walk back. One reason was to digest, and another was that it wasn’t easy to see him, so I wanted to stay with him longer, and even longer.

But I knew I had to get up early tomorrow, and I had a whole head full of matters waiting for me to handle. “Walking” was really too much of a luxury for me…

“Okay, let’s walk.” I lifted my head and smiled deeply at him.

We walked along the seaside, chatting as we went.

I talked about my experiences in Africa—spiders bigger than heads, super cheap seafood, monotonous work, and life full of crises.

He rarely spoke, just listened quietly, occasionally asking a question.

“Can you imagine?” I said, “My room didn’t even have a table. When I got anxious I’d lie on the floor writing reports, hahaha!”

“Couldn’t you buy a table?”

“Even the nearest supermarket was especially far. Later Old Feng, that’s my leader, made one for me.”

Actually things like that were too expensive to buy in Africa. I looked and looked but couldn’t bear to buy one. Old Feng glanced at me, and the next day he showed up carrying two small tables.

I said, why two?

He said with a straight face, “A girl needs a vanity table.”

Cheng Xia didn’t speak again, lowering his head to look at his own toes.

I was most afraid of awkward silence, so I self-deprecatingly said, “But with how rough I am now, a vanity table would be wasted on me.”

There’s a saying that the face after twenty-five is one you give yourself.

When I was in my teens I was passable, but years of wind and rain made my skin rough and dark, my hair like a handful of dead grass. Standing together with girls my age from the city, we were completely two different species.

That day we walked five or six kilometers before taking a cab home.

The house I bought was on the first floor with a small courtyard. Grandma planted some fruits and vegetables inside, and what we couldn’t eat she would take out to sell.

Every time I saw this house, I felt that the countless regrets in my heart all receded like the tide.

I had offered up my beauty, six years of youth, and a young girl’s ease and happiness as a sacrifice to the god of fate.

In exchange for a warm home in this city.

This deal was incredibly worthwhile.

“It’s too late, my grandma’s asleep, so I won’t invite you in. Go back!” I said.

Cheng Xia nodded, walked away then turned back to say, “I think you’re very beautiful.”

I froze.

He said, “You posted a little leopard in your Moments. I thought it was especially like you—beautiful, full of vitality, just… running too fast.”

Before I could come to my senses, he had already gotten in a taxi and left.

I remembered that I had once gone to East Africa to watch animal migration and photographed a leopard with a pensive expression, with the caption: Who is it thinking of?

Visible only to Cheng Xia.

He didn’t like it. Good grief, so he was actually secretly checking my Moments!

I was a bit happy, and naturally forgot to ask what his last sentence meant.

Just like I deliberately ignored what he had experienced during these six years.

After the arduous initial adjustment period, the project began entering a stable phase.

Some people, unable to bear the deadly work intensity, resigned. Those who stayed developed some feelings.

When I could catch my breath a little, I treated everyone to dinner.

I said, “I’m also a worker. I don’t force everyone to fight desperately. I can only be grateful to everyone who stayed. Whether it’s bonuses or prospects, I won’t shortchange anyone.”

This was the truth. I decided to give them all the money I could apply for. For those with promotion opportunities, I submitted recommendations for all of them.

A construction worker clinked glasses with me and said, “Manager Ren, I’ll work steadily with you. You’re smart and work hard, and you have people above you. Your future is limitless.”

People above me…

I smiled bitterly. Because of my relationship with Old Feng, some people in the company and I had naturally become adversaries.

But only Old Feng and I knew clearly that our relationship wasn’t that “intimate” at all. If something really happened, he wouldn’t protect me.

But I couldn’t explain this to them. I could only smile bitterly and drink the toast from each person.

This meal was hearty and satisfying. They left burping from alcohol, and I stayed until the end, arranging for a driver to pick up those who were too drunk.

Li Gong was sprawled on the table dead drunk. When I went to help him up, I unexpectedly saw his phone with an unlocked screen. It was a group chat.

Bao Long: The dwarf orangutan is spouting bullshit again, I’m going to puke.

Fenghuo Playing with Lords: Without Old Feng, what is she? She’s not even worthy of licking feet.

Suo Long: Who told her to have abundant energy and spread her legs wide?

That Suo Long was the construction worker who had just said with a simple and honest face that he would work “steadily” with me.

And that dwarf orangutan was obviously referring to me.

I turned Li Gong’s phone face down. Then the driver pulled the car over, and I woke him up and told him to send a WeChat when he got home.

Then I went back to the office to continue working overtime.

It wasn’t that I wasn’t disappointed.

Sometimes I even had a perversely satisfying thought in my heart—if I really did get together with Old Feng, what would they do?

Old Feng dealt with these dissatisfied and indignant people with swift and decisive action.

But no, I couldn’t. If I wanted to live with dignity, I couldn’t make one wrong step. I had to climb up with complete innocence.

At times like this, I would always think of Cheng Xia.

He stood at the construction site entrance waving at me, his voice clear and bright as he told me about the books he’d read recently. He came to my house to accompany Grandma planting vegetables, his forehead glistening, all covered in sweat.

He was so clean. Only when looking at him could I temporarily forget work and take a deep breath.

Then I felt full of fighting spirit, able to battle another hundred rounds on the muddy construction site.

This was the precious quality of a white moonlight—not only because of being pure and flawless, but also because he truly illuminated me.

I sent Cheng Xia a WeChat message asking if he wanted to have a late-night snack together.

Later we had restored contact. No one mentioned that confrontation six years ago where the map was exhausted and the dagger revealed. We also never mentioned anything about liking or loving. We got along as before, sharing daily trivia every day. Occasionally he would come pick me up from work and we’d go eat something good together.

The only difference was that I was no longer that self-deceiving little girl. I was clearer than anyone that this was loneliness, not love.

But there were always some moments when I especially wanted to see him, like now.

I sent Cheng Xia a WeChat message asking if he wanted to have a late-night snack together.

He quickly replied, saying he had just finished working overtime and eaten with colleagues, but he could come pick me up now.

“Godzilla is out, want to go see a movie together?”

“Sure.”

Speaking of movie theaters, they really were great places to sleep. Every time I went in, I could sleep like the world was ending.

I wrapped up my work, then washed my face and clumsily put on makeup.

I was clear in my heart that my skill level couldn’t make anything look good, but I just hoped that when I saw him, I could become slightly prettier, even just a little bit.

I waited at the construction site entrance. Cheng Xia’s car quickly arrived.

“It’s so cold, why did it take so long?” Just as I was about to get in the car, the passenger side window rolled down.

A girl as sweet and tender as jelly leaned out the window, waving hard at me. “Hello, sister!”