Lin Shilan was extremely exhausted.

During these days of searching for Tan Jin, she hadn’t slept well. Holding him, she felt so comfortable that she was about to fall asleep.

The enormous quantity of ocean balls wrapped around them—the more they tried to struggle, the deeper they sank.

They simply stopped moving.

They hid in this pitch-black corner, drawing warmth from each other’s bodies.

She stroked the hair at the back of his head. Tan Jin’s hair felt like a small bird’s feathers when touched—warm and soft.

The gentle caressing gradually smoothed down his ruffled state.

Tan Jin released all the strength from his body, his head resting against her shoulder like a weary bird returning to its nest.

In the tranquility.

The phone vibrated from an incoming call.

The peace of their two-person world was instantly shattered.

Tan Jin had clearly said the phone was left in the mall—he was lying again.

Lin Shilan sighed and vengefully tousled his hair into a mess.

“Give me the phone,” she extended her hand toward him.

Tan Jin’s mouth drooped in a pout, but unlike before, he didn’t disobey. He obediently took the phone from his pants pocket and handed it to Lin Shilan.

It was still a call from Tan Ziheng.

She pressed the answer button and put the phone to her ear.

Even though the phone wasn’t on speaker, it was so quiet here that Tan Jin could hear Tan Ziheng’s voice even without leaning closer.

“Xiao Lan, where did you go? Why haven’t you answered your phone for so long? You’ve worried me to death.”

No longer maintaining his usually composed image, Tan Ziheng yelled at her at the top of his lungs.

He was truly worried about her.

“I came to this city to find the rain.”

“Only when it rains can I see the person I want to see. Brother Ziheng, I’ve found him now, so I’m sorry, I can’t have dinner with you.”

Lin Shilan’s voice sounded calm.

She didn’t say who “the person she wanted to see” was, but Tan Ziheng’s heart jumped with alarm.

“I learned about your situation from Cao A’yi… those are just hallucinations, Xiao Lan.”

His voice trembled, unable to conceal the enormous sorrow in his heart: “Xiao Jin is already gone. No matter how much I wish he could come back, he won’t come back. We who are alive should look forward.”

Lin Shilan looked at the young man beside her.

He sat hunched over hugging his knees, holding an ocean ball in his hand, clumsily rubbing and playing with the ball. On his face was an indescribable desolation.

“Tan Jin exists.”

She was so certain, so convinced.

“Brother Ziheng, it’s fine, I know what I’m doing.”

The more firmly she stood her ground, the more Tan Ziheng felt that Lin Shilan’s illness had penetrated deep into her bones.

Countless times, Tan Ziheng had heard her say “it’s fine.”

After their reunion, Lin Shilan had pushed him away again and again.

Perhaps this was the consequence of caring from afar all these years without truly getting close to her. But Tan Ziheng didn’t dare to let go just like that. He showed his complete sincerity, making one final effort to pull her back.

“Xiao Lan, I know you need help, so there’s no way I can just stand by and watch. Four years—this concern comes too late, but I still don’t want you to treat me as an outsider. Don’t use ‘it’s fine’ to push me away. Let’s talk, okay?”

“I hope you can open your heart to me.”

Tan Ziheng, the kind and reliable big brother next door.

Throughout her youth, she had looked up to him—he had once been the goal she strived toward.

Even today, he was still a ray of light on her life’s path.

“Four years.”

Lin Shilan chewed on these three words, feeling as if she were dreaming.

“Brother Ziheng, where should I start? These four years, I’ve had such a hard time—life has been so difficult. It seems that not just these four years of rain, but a muddy mood has soaked my entire life from childhood until now. I just… never had the chance to dry myself out.”

“Since childhood, I’ve never found anything simple to do. I’m often dejected about the things I mess up. Even at the age when I should have grown up, I still don’t know how to support myself, how to take responsibility for myself. I don’t dare to cry, because vulnerability makes me look like a failure, so when I’m at my most miserable, I can’t say anything. That feeling is like… I’m being devoured by anxiety. For so long, I can’t find my own value. I take a lot of medicine to stay alive, but I don’t even know what I’m staying alive for…”

Her hands and feet turned cold, her breathing became difficult—the painful memories made it impossible for her to continue.

Her mouth felt sealed shut, her breathing so shallow, the air she drew in so little.

The ocean balls made rustling noises.

A tall, large body leaned over.

After bringing up traumatic experiences, goosebumps of cold emerged in a layer on Lin Shilan’s arms.

Tan Jin gathered many ocean balls over, letting them surround her to provide warmth.

He didn’t interrupt the conversation between Tan Ziheng and Lin Shilan.

During the long years of secretly loving Lin Shilan, Tan Jin had stayed in dark corners just like now. He watched as Lin Shilan and his brother developed feelings for each other. He watched as his brother accepted the wallet and card that Lin Shilan gave him.

Because he had waited silently like that before, when their relationship drew close again, he became frightened like a wildly barking mad dog.

Tan Jin harbored resentment.

He resented his brother for speaking beautiful words and using certificates and report cards to attract Lin Shilan’s attention.

He resented his brother for being able to exist in the same world as Lin Shilan, for being able to take her away from the rainy season.

After hearing what his brother said on this phone call, Tan Jin finally discovered that actually, he resented himself even more.

He couldn’t help her the way his brother could. He wasn’t Lin Shilan’s lifeline, wasn’t her only ally in the world. He was the instigator who dragged her into the endless rainy season.

She said: Tan Jin exists.

Lin Shilan’s belief left Tan Jin with nowhere to hide.

He didn’t interrupt them, because wherever she wanted to go, neither he nor his brother could influence her.

The power of choice had always been in Lin Shilan’s hands from beginning to end.

From the other end of the phone came Tan Ziheng’s voice.

“I’ll take you to a place without rain. From now on, we’ll avoid the rain, never get caught in the rain again, and let all the hallucinations in the rain disappear. Then, everything will get better.”

He paused, then said solemnly.

“Xiao Lan, let me take care of you.”

Tan Ziheng had feelings for Lin Shilan.

Whether in the rainy season of the past or the rainy season of now, Tan Ziheng was waiting for her.

Though Tan Jin didn’t want to admit it, he also knew that Tan Ziheng could give Lin Shilan a real, tangible future.

“Brother Ziheng, I don’t want to hide…”

“I’ve already been running away for four years. The me now is no longer afraid of getting caught in the rain.”

Wiping away the moisture at the corners of her eyes, Lin Shilan broke into a smile through her tears.

Lying at the very bottom of the dark staircase, her heart felt warm as light rose within it.

“This rainy season holds extraordinary significance for me. My first time drinking milk tea, my first time slapping my Uncle Tang, my first time stubbornly going against my mom regardless of consequences, my first time raising a puppy, my first time feeling my heart flutter… This rainy season is different from ordinary rainy seasons. I’m alive, alive for my own sake.”

“Accepting Tan Jin’s existence is, for me, looking forward. So I won’t run away—not this time, not in the future.”

“In the future, I’ll take good care of myself and grow into my own strong tree. Whatever path I choose, even if I choose wrong, I’ll walk it through, never afraid.”

The phone’s battery died and it shut off in her hand, just as Lin Shilan finished her last sentence.

She tossed aside the darkened screen and opened her arms wide toward Tan Jin.

He tumbled over clumsily, taking several tumbles in the ocean balls. Her slender arms couldn’t possibly support his weight—when he threw himself at her, she was buried in the pile of ocean balls again.

This burial yielded a discovery for Lin Shilan.

Her fingers caught something—she found the backpack buried among the balls.

She happily unzipped the backpack and said to Tan Jin: “I bought you milk tea! Quick, try it—it’s even better than what we drank in the small town.”

When she pulled out the milk tea for a look, it was a bit unfortunate.

Having crossed the distance between two cities, its condition wasn’t very good—the tea and milk had separated into layers.

Tan Jin didn’t mind at all. He shook the milk tea and inserted the straw. Ignoring Lin Shilan’s objections, he took a big sip directly.

As he drank, he praised: “Really delicious, really delicious.”

Borrowing a bit of light from the distance, she caught a glimpse of Tan Jin’s eyes rimmed with red.

He covered his eyes with the back of his hand.

Lin Shilan reached over and touched his round face: “Why are you sad?”

Tan Jin lowered his eyes, his long lashes moistened by tears.

“Earlier, I was jealous of Tan Ziheng.”

She curved the corners of her mouth: “I know.”

He clenched his fists: “I’m very bad, very ugly…”

How could anyone talk about themselves like that? She couldn’t help but smile.

“I lied to you—I said I forgot the oath, but actually I remember it all.”

When she saw the note, Lin Shilan had already guessed.

“I know.” Lin Shilan’s smile didn’t change.

Tan Jin lifted his eyes, love surging in his gaze.

He was shy and timid, yet also incomparably clear and articulate.

“I’ve liked you since a very long time ago.”

She smiled sweetly: “I know.”

“In the future, we can still be together for a very long time.”

Light kindled in Tan Jin’s eyes.

Just for an instant—then the light in his eyes extinguished, returning to dimness.

“I’m already dead.”

Lin Shilan’s heart felt hollow.

She maintained her smile and still told him.

“I know.”

The rain outside grew heavier.

The pattering raindrops fell on the mall’s roof, leaving arrays of hollow echoes by their ears.

Neither of them spoke anymore.

At least it was still raining.

Her heart tasted bitter, but her face showed no trace of it.

Still the same gesture as before, Lin Shilan opened her arms wide toward Tan Jin, seeking a hug.

He gently embraced her.

Making his large self try hard to shrink down until his chin could rest on her shoulder’s height, his left hand stroked her arm while his right hand squeezed her hand resting on her leg.

Listening to the rain, she was like a puddle of water, gradually melting.

Her body was becoming lighter. Lin Shilan asked in a tiny voice.

“If I fall asleep now, when I wake up, will you still be by my side?”

“Yes,” he said.

Before he died, he had made an oath to her.

He would always stay with her.

The past four years, and the more distant future—he would stay with her.

Forever and always, remaining by her side.