In the mortal realm, at the Fragrant Wine Restaurant. This restaurant wasn’t entirely proper, and neither was the storyteller, who half-reclined in his chair with his long legs crossed and propped on the table, looking like a rogue.

“The Danfu Sect’s pills are most famous.” Behind the screen, the storyteller put down his covered tea bowl, the lid clicking against the cup with a crisp sound.

As soon as his words fell, there was an uproar outside, “Isn’t that obvious? Danfu Sect’s pills, Gujian Sect’s swords—who doesn’t know that?”

“Cough, cough, the Danfu Sect has something even more famous than their pills, which you don’t know about.”

“Tell us!” Copper coins were thrown over, and the storyteller immediately smiled, lowering his voice: “Women’s chests.”

The screen was semi-transparent, and with the sunlight just right outside, the storyteller’s figure cast a shadow on the screen. They could see him making exaggerated gestures with both hands, “Especially the most famous Dan Ruyun now—damn, she’s carrying two big watermelons in her arms.”

A group of men all laughed lewdly, “What nonsense, as if you’ve seen them.”

“Not only have I seen them, I’ve even touched them!”

“Looking for a beating! If Danfu Sect cultivators heard that, they’d flay you alive!”

“What about Yunxiao Sect? I’m planning to send my son there to learn!” someone else asked.

“Yunxiao Sect is naturally quite good too.” The storyteller took a sip of tea to moisten his throat. “Do you know what the Yunxiao Sect is most famous for?”

“Qin Chuan with his Triple Yang Convergence Constitution! I heard he’s handsome and talented, a dragon among men!”

“A few days ago, I heard he visited our mortal cities. The flowers thrown by young ladies along the way could pile up the entire street.” Some women in the restaurant laughed as they spoke.

“Qin Chuan is alright, I suppose.” The storyteller made clicking sounds, “What Yunxiao Sect is most famous for is the Wangtian Tree.”

“You’re just bragging. What’s so famous about a tree?”

“That’s because you don’t know. Those two from the Gujian Sect comprehended the sword dao on the Yunxiao Sect’s Wangtian Tree. That tree is a wonderful place where cultivation advances by leaps and bounds. Even just standing under the tree, a pig could embark on the immortal path.”

“Really?”

“Absolutely. That’s a divine tree. If the Yunxiao Sect Master ever comes to his senses and organizes visits to the Wangtian Tree to earn some incense money, Yunxiao Sect’s threshold might be trampled down, making it the world’s richest cultivation sect.”

Yunxiao Sect used to be the world’s number one in swordsmanship.

Now, were they heading towards becoming the world’s richest with no turning back?

“That tree often moves without wind, swaying so much that if a fallen leaf happens to land on your head, you might just…”

The storyteller momentarily forgot his words. Hearing a woman asking urgently, he said in a panic, “You might just be blessed with a precious child.”

Oh my, the Wangtian Tree could even serve as a fertility goddess—it deserved proper worship.

Unfortunately, the Yunxiao Sect Master didn’t have the sense to let everyone visit. Immortal sects were immortal sects—they could secretly gossip about it, but it absolutely couldn’t reach their ears.

“Gujian Sect! Gujian Sect! Tell us about the Gujian Sect!” The Gujian Sect was truly the world’s number one, so everyone was most interested in it. When someone mentioned it, others joined in clamoring.

“Gujian Sect has many famous things. You know about the three great beauties, right?”

“We know, we know! Sword Master Su Zhuyi, her disciple Su Hulu, and her lover Qin Jianglan.”

The storyteller spat out a mouthful of hot tea.

He had been sitting casually, but now he sat up straight with a serious expression: “Qin Jianglan is the true Sword Master in my heart. His swordsmanship is divine…”

Before he could finish, someone threw a plate at him, “That Qin fellow is just a pretty boy who follows Su Da Da around eating and drinking. To be a man to that extent…”

He changed his tune: “Damn, that’s so cool! I’d be willing too if it were me!”

The woman beside him spat at him, “With your bear-like appearance, don’t even think about it.”

“Uh, let’s not talk about the three beauties. I won’t argue with you people who don’t understand. Let me tell you about the most famous thing…”

“What the Gujian Sect is most famous for is protecting their own. Do you know what protecting their means?”

“Just last time, Little Hulu went to Yunbao City—that’s where cultivation disciples buy treasures. Little Hulu took a fancy to a silk ribbon, a rather enchanting and beautiful magical treasure. While she was haggling with the shopkeeper, disciples from other sects saw her and had a somewhat bad attitude…”

“How was it bad?”

“They said, ‘If you can’t afford it, I’ll buy it.'”

Little Hulu was from the countryside, not very bright, though quite beautiful, but she had a simple air about her. Plus she dressed plainly, so at first glance she looked like a silly girl. Most importantly, she was very stingy—even with plenty of spirit stones, she was reluctant to spend them, preferring to sleep in piles of spirit stones and magical treasures.

This behavior, who knows who she learned it from, couldn’t be corrected no matter what.

Probably because she suffered and went hungry as a child, she always felt these were good days that fell from heaven, so she feared being knocked back to her original state and hoarded spirit stones every day.

That magical red silk ribbon was very expensive—over a thousand high-grade spirit stones. Little Hulu usually wouldn’t even look at such things, but that day, for some unknown reason, she took a fancy to it and haggled with the seller. Just when she had finally worn down the seller and was about to succeed, an arrogant female disciple came along, mocked her for being poor, and bought the item at a high price.

“What happened then?” After hearing the story, everyone became interested and asked eagerly.

“Little Hulu’s eyes turned red, but she didn’t say anything. When her senior brother came over and asked, he learned what had happened. Her senior brother is kind and reasonable, so he comforted her, coaxing her with good food and drink. Just when he had cheered her up, that person came.”

“Which person?”

“Who else could it be? Hulu’s master, Sword Master herself.” When mentioning Sword Master Su Zhuyi, both men and women showed faces full of admiration.

“That’s right. With just one glance, the people around told her the whole story from beginning to end.”

“Then it was incredible—Sword Master flew into a rage.”

“She’s a Sword Master! That female disciple was just a junior at the Ningshen Stage!”

“Bullying the weak with strength?”

The storyteller paused, “My throat’s a bit dry. Can’t afford good throat-moistening tea.”

With a clatter, more reward money was thrown over. He chuckled twice, “I saw Sword Master Su form her five fingers into claws and grab through the void, snatching back that female disciple who had already walked ten li away and lifting her into the air.”

“Then guess what happened?”

“Damn it, stop dragging it out and speak quickly!” The impatient big man was ready to tear down the screen and drag the storyteller out for a beating.

They heard Sword Master Su say, “Who did you call poor? Who did you say was shabby and couldn’t afford things?”

Then she threw the person to the ground and took out spirit stones from her pouch to throw at her, one by one, hitting only the face, turning a perfectly pretty girl into a pig-head.

“That was it, but from her tone, she didn’t plan to spare her even after turning her into a pig-head.”

“Was she going to kill her?”

A lesson would suffice. Killing her would be somewhat unreasonable—it was just bickering between juniors. Plus, Su Zhuyi was the world’s number one sword, using spirit stones to hit a righteous junior’s face…

Probably only she could put aside her dignity to do such a thing.

“Finally, guess who stopped her?”

“Little Hulu and her senior brother are kind-hearted. They probably pleaded for that female disciple?”

“Bullshit! It was Sword Master Qin grabbing her ear and dragging her away!”

“Impossible! Isn’t that Qin fellow just a pretty boy who lives off his looks? Can he beat Sword Master Su?”

Probably?

“How did he grab her ear? Was it like this?” A voice sounded beside the storyteller’s ear, startling him so much that his whole body trembled and he dropped his tea bowl.

“Dan, Dan Dan…”

“My chest is as big as watermelons—you touched them?”

“Song Shangzhi, you have such audacity! You think I can’t find you by hiding in the mortal realm?”

“You took advantage of me and still want to run!”

With his ear being twisted, Song Shangzhi wanted to cry, “Master Dan, Master Dan, I was wrong, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have bumped into you, I shouldn’t have looked randomly, I shouldn’t have…”

Dan Ruyun’s pretty face flushed red. She snorted coldly, “Isn’t Gujian Sect famous for protecting their own? Let’s see if she protects you this time. Come with me!” She used force and yanked Song Shangzhi’s head hard, but because of the awkward position of twisting his ear, his head bumped into Dan Ruyun’s chest again.

Song Shangzhi immediately blushed: “…”

Not watermelons.

Watermelons are hard, but that was soft.

“Why did you stop talking? Continue!” Seeing no movement behind the screen, the crowd couldn’t wait and pulled the screen aside. Good heavens, where was anyone? There were no other exits around—where did the storyteller go?

Everyone looked at each other in confusion. Could he also be a cultivator? That was really…

Quite down-to-earth.