Yuxiu’s death did not slow Song Huai’an’s frenzied advance.
I do not know whether, in the moment Yuxiu leaped, that heart-rending cry he let out came from true and deep remorse.
Seven years of marriage โ if even a single instant of anguished grief was the return, it counts as the only solace Yuxiu would ever receive.
Standing at the door of the palace chamber that had been her prison, my tears had already run dry. The children had exhausted themselves into sleep. Yet Song Huai’an had launched another round of attack, more brutal than before.
Yuxiu โ on this night, at this hour, who weeps for you?
I pressed my hand over my mouth, stifling the sobs that threatened to break free. In the distance, the battlements already thundered with the roar of killing, and flames surged into the sky.
The nine-tiered palace halls, symbol of supreme imperial power, cast enormous shadows in the firelight, swaying as though on the verge of collapse amid the sounds of slaughter.
A faint figure flickered beneath a distant palace corridor, then stopped and melted into the shadows.
“Wang Fu.” I straightened and called out to him. At a time like this, the only person who would dare venture here uninvited could only be this utterly loyal old steward.
Wang Fu stepped out from behind a pillar and hurried toward me with his head bowed low. “This old servant has disturbed the Princess Consort.”
I walked to the corridor. The cold moonlight slanted across half my body. “Is everything ready?”
“All preparations are complete. Eighteen death-oath soldiers stand ready at your command.” Wang Fu’s figure was stout, yet in this moment he bore none of his usual sluggishness โ his every movement carried a hidden, razor-sharp edge. Who would have imagined that this aged, heavyset eunuch was the supreme master of martial arts concealed within the imperial guard?
I said calmly, “You have served in the palace all these years. Now that you are getting on in age, it is time you went back to your hometown to see it again.”
“This old servant will not go.” Wang Fu startled, then bowed his head and said, “This old servant has had no home for twenty years. In the days to come, there may still be ways the Princess Consort has need of me. I beseech the Princess Consort’s mercy โ please allow this old servant to remain.”
“If I remember correctly, you still have a daughter back home in Qingzhou.” I held his gaze and smiled faintly. “She is well. She has already married and has children of her own. My father arranged for her a household of comfortable means, with kind and virtuous in-laws, and a devoted husband and wife. Only โ she does not know you are still alive.”
Wang Fu’s broad shoulders trembled slightly. He kept his head bowed, his expression unreadable.
I sighed softly. “You have served the Wang family loyally for many years. I have no way to repay you. This time, you will leave with them and need not return. Live well in your hometown, enjoying the warmth of family. The treasures hidden in the Hall of Ten Thousand Blessings โ take them all. Beyond what is needed to settle the two masters, distribute the rest among everyone… even those who have died โ give their share to their families.”
Wang Fu abruptly knelt. His white-haired head struck the ground with a heavy thud. “The Princess Consort’s great kindness โ even in death, this old servant could not repay it.”
I turned to one side. The rims of my eyes grew warm.
Deep in the Hall of Qianyuan, candle shadows flickered behind lowered plain white curtains. Zidan still stubbornly kept the entire palace draped in white mourning cloth, in grief for the little imperial prince who had died so young.
I stood behind the hanging drapes and watched him in silence. Around him, manuscripts and scrolls were piled across the floor. He was still writing furiously, beads of faint perspiration on his pale brow. This man, like warm jade in appearance โ even though his temples had begun to show the faintest traces of frost, he showed no sign of age.
If he were drifting in a light robe on a small boat, at ease beyond this world, he would surely possess the brilliance of an immortal.
Wind passed through the carved window, lifting a page of manuscript from his desk and letting it drift to the floor. I stepped out from behind the drapes and bent to pick it up. The ink on it had not yet fully dried.
He raised his eyes without expression, glanced at me once, and returned to writing with his head bowed.
“Zidan.” I called his name softly.
His brush paused. He still did not look up, only said lightly, “What is it, Princess Consort?”
I said nothing, watching him steadily for a long moment, then spoke slowly, word by word: “Zidan, I need you to draft an abdication edict at once and retire to a separate palace.”
Zidan’s wrist trembled. The ink spread in a dark, spreading blot beneath his brush.
He set the brush down slowly, crushed the imperial gold-flecked paper, and smiled with a quiet anguish. “Is this… the last thing I can do for you?”
I pressed my lips together and said nothing, doing my utmost to control the expression on my face, lest grief show through.
Zidan fixed his gaze on me. Gradually his smile faded, and his look cooled, degree by degree.
From beneath the desk piled with manuscripts, he drew out a long yellow silk box, opened it, took out a rolled yellow silk scroll, and flung it to the floor before me.
“Take it.” His smile was faint, his eyes hollow. “It has long been written and waiting for you โ it has only been waiting for this day.”
Wang Fu appeared from behind the drapes like a shadow, stepped forward, picked up the edict with both hands, and offered it to me.
“The great Way in its operation selects the worthy and the able. Rise and fall know no fixed time; abdication belongs to no single clan. This has been the principle across a hundred kings, and its origins are ancient. Though We are ordinary and dim-sighted, lacking in the great Way, We have long contemplated the lessons of decline and renewal. Now the Regent, Prince Yuzhang, is endowed with sagely virtue from Heaven, preeminent in civil and martial brilliance, has driven back the unruly and restored the realm, rectified the state altars, and remade the dynasty anew. Moreover, his countenance is distinguished and singular, his bearing Heaven-bestowed, the very embodiment of a ruler, radiant as sun and moon. Thus the four sacred creatures have shown their auspicious signs, mountains and rivers have revealed their mandate, celestial signs have foretold the appointed time, and the hearts of all within the realm aspire in joyful accord toward him, to grant him the position of the ninety-fifth degree. In contemplation of the highest righteousness that endures through ten thousand generations, and in accordance with the supreme expectations of Heaven and man, We hereby abdicate to a separate palace, yielding the throne to the Prince, in accordance with the manner of the ancient abdications of Tang and Yu.”
I raised my eyes. Zidan and I looked at each other, our gazes locked across the five steps between us. A mere five steps โ yet it was a lifetime of grace and grievance, divided forever.
“Your Majesty is wise.” I lowered my head, knelt before him, and bowed three times to the floor.
Wang Fu also knelt at once, touching his forehead to the ground.
“You have achieved your wish. I shall trouble you no further. A cup of wine is all I ask.” Zidan still wore a smile, but the light in his eyes had turned to ash. “Only โ let my writings be without guilt. I ask that these manuscripts be preserved in the world.”
And so he placed himself before me โ without defense, without further resistance.
A cup of wine is all I ask โ how utterly final.
Suddenly, I could no longer see his face clearly. Everything before me blurred, and only then did I realize that tears had come to my eyes.
I nodded and raised my hand to clap it three times.
Wang Fu carried in a jade tray and stepped into the inner chamber. On the tray sat a jade cup of deep green. The wine shimmered amber, its fragrance rising in rippling waves.
I lifted the jade cup and said, tears in my eyes but a smile on my lips, “Zidan, I send you on your way with this cup of wine.”
He rose and walked toward me, step by step, a faint trace of composure still at the corner of his lips.
“Thank you.” He took the jade cup with a smile and tilted his head back, draining it in a single draught.
My tears broke free and rolled down my cheeks, blurring everything before me.
“If there is a next life, would you still be willing to remember me?” I asked him softly.
Zidan shook his head with a smile, stepped back several paces, his voice faintly trembling. “A’Wu โ I wish this life had never known you!”
I squeezed my eyes shut, as though pierced through the heart by an arrow.
Zidan lurched and gripped the desk behind him, laughing in a broken voice.
I could no longer suppress the anguish in my heart. I stepped forward and held him tightly.
This embrace had been familiar since childhood โ like a father’s, like a brother’s, yet different from either… The familiar scent of the incense on his robes enveloped me, as though separating the two of us from all of heaven and earth.
I buried my face deep against his chest and breathed in the agarwood on his robes for the last time, choking as I said, “No matter what you face from now on โ live well, and cherish the people by your side.”
He shuddered, raised his hand as though to push me away, but had already lost the strength.
“Zidan, I will miss you… I will miss you always.” My fingers lightly brushed over the faint frost at his temples โ just as he had always, after our childhood play, carefully smoothed my disheveled hair back into place.
That cup of wine would send him into a sleep of two days. When he woke, he would already be beyond this world, escaped forever from the cage that had imprisoned him for half his life.
The medicine was taking effect, leaving his mind in a daze, yet he forced his eyes wide open and stared at me without blinking, his pale, thin lips trembling ceaselessly.
“A’Yao is still waiting for you. Your manuscripts โ I will see to it that they are passed down through the ages.” With tears in my eyes, I gazed upon his face. This was the last look. From here on, I would never see him again, never reach out and touch him again… A person this beautiful deserved to be loved by the most devoted woman in the world. The freedom so many had pursued even at the cost of their lives โ it now lay open before him.
Zidan’s gaze had grown unfocused. A single tear slid down his cheek. At last, he slowly sank.
“I implore Your Majesty to depart at once โ please do not hesitate further!” Wang Fu urged anxiously.
I entrusted Zidan to him, finally letting go, stepping back a pace. “Wang Fu โ I leave everything to you. Take care of yourself from now on.”
Wang Fu knelt to the ground, his head striking it heavily. “This old servant bids farewell to the Princess Consort!”
In the direction of the Gate ofๆฟๅคฉ Chengtian, the flames burned fiercer, and the sounds of slaughter grew louder.
Suddenly, a sharp, piercing whistle split the air.
By now the eastern sky was growing pale โ dawn was breaking, in the gray light of early morning.
I stood in the middle of the palace road, staring up in a daze at the distant sky, my heart lurching violently.
That whistle had come so abruptly โ as though it pierced straight through my chest. Could it beโ
“Please be careful, Princess Consort โ there is fighting on the battlements!” A maidservant caught up to me and, heedless of rank or propriety, frantically blocked my path.
“It is him โ he has come.” The words left my mouth and I could no longer restrain myself. Though I bit down hard on my lip, I could not stop my shoulders from trembling.
The maidservant caught me in alarm. I shook free with a sweep of my sleeve, pushed her aside, and ran toward the battlements.
My legs felt soft and weak beneath me, yet I had never run so fast.
The battlements were a scene of savage carnage.
And yet โ the rebel army’s formations below, layers upon layers of them like molten iron, were beginning to compress and withdraw. In the distance behind them, some kind of commotion had broken out. Indistinctly came the muffled sounds of clamor, howling, and horns โ sounds that seemed to shake the mountains and the earth โ rolling in from the southeast direction, growing louder and louder. Even standing atop the palace gate, I could feel the low, rolling thunder-like rumble rising from the ground beneath my feet.
That direction โ it was the eastern gate of the capital, and it was where the Eastern Suburb Military Camp was stationed.
Wei Han came charging forward with bloodshot eyes, blade in hand.
“General Hu has broken into the city!” A garrison soldier burst onto the battlements, gasping for breath. “Commander-in-Chief of the Pacification Forces, Hu Guanglie, has led the vanguard through the eastern gate! General of Chariots and Cavalry, Xie Xiaohe, has reached the outer Gate of Taihua! His Highness the Prince has personally arrived outside the city walls to take command of the Eastern Suburb garrison forces โ the rebel army is already in chaos!”
The moment those words fell, a thunderous cheer erupted on the battlements.
He had truly come back โ sooner and faster than I had anticipated!
I bit my lip. Amid the deafening roar of jubilant shouts, tears suddenly streamed down my face.
Fires blazed near and far, and a chorus of voices rang out from every direction. Faintly, through the chaos of armies, voices could be heard running and calling: “Song Huai’an has seized the Emperor by force and is burning the city to storm the palaceโ!” “Prince Yuzhang has returned with his forces to suppress the rebellionโ!”
“His Highness the Prince has finally come!” Wei Han laughed loudly, tore off his iron face guard, and the crimson scar on his face was all the more vivid in the firelight. Had it not been for everyone’s steadfast defense, we might not have held on long enough for Xiao Qi’s return.
I looked at this iron-boned man and said quietly, “It is too soon to call this a victory. There is still one step remaining.”
“Does the Princess Consort mean to press the attack?” Wei Han looked startled.
“No. I want to let the rebel army into the palace.” I smiled.
Wei Han’s eyes went wide. “What?”
I dropped the smile, and spoke clearly, word by word: “Someone must bear the crime of regicide.”
Wei Han’s pupils contracted sharply. Stunned, he said, “You mean to use one blade against another โ to use the Emperorโ”
“The Emperor has already left behind a testament edict: should the dragon carriage depart from this world, Prince Yuzhang is to inherit the supreme throne.” I turned to face the direction of the Gate of Taihua and said slowly, “We break through the Gate of Taihua and join forces with Xie Xiaohe, then open the Gate of Chengtian and let Song Huai’an lead his troops in.”
Wei Han abruptly turned to look toward where the Hall of Qianyuan stood. Thick smoke and roaring flames had already begun to rise from there. The entire palace was being consumed by fire โ not only the Hall of Qianyuan, but the Zhaoyang Palace where the Empress resided had also been engulfed in a sea of flames.
These flames proved that Wang Fu had already taken them away through the secret passage under cover of the chaos. The Emperor and Empress’s sleeping quarters were destroyed by the fire, erasing all traces.
The monstrous crime of forcing the Emperor’s death and storming the palace would naturally fall upon Song Huai’an’s head.
At the third quarter of the mao hour, the siege of the Gate of Taihua collapsed.
The rebel commander encircling the Gate of Taihua defected in the midst of battle, surrendering to General of Chariots and Cavalry Xie Xiaohe.
Pang Gui led the Iron Guard forward to clear the way, escorting my imperial carriage as it drove out through the Gate of Taihua. The Empress Dowager’s carriage followed behind. Wei Han commanded the imperial guards as the rear guard, feigning defeat at the Gate of Chengtian, retreating step by step, luring Song Huai’an’s rebel army to storm through the palace gate and push forward with slaughter. The raging fires of the Hall of Qianyuan and the Hall of Zhaoyang painted the sky above the nine-tiered palace halls a lurid crimson, like blood.
The palace gates that had once blazed with supreme majesty could no longer hold back this nightmarish slaughter. My imperial carriage raced away from the palace gates, leaving the killing and the smoke far behind, sealed within the palace walls. I held the small girl in my arms and gripped Qinzhi’s ice-cold little hand, gazing back in silence at the palace gates, my heart left with nothing but a vast desolation.
The wheels clattered swiftly along the palace road. Two columns of iron cavalry flanked us on either side, escorting us safely away.
The moment we passed through the palace gates, broken blades and severed limbs lined both sides of the road, blood smeared everywhere, corpses strewn across the ground in appalling devastation. I had long grown accustomed to the sight of bloodshed, yet even now my hands and feet went cold. I abruptly let the curtain fall, afraid that Qinzhi at my side might see this horror.
Qinzhi rested quietly against me, her small face ashen, doing her utmost to hold herself composed as always. The infant in my arms had already fallen fast asleep, wholly unaware of everything happening at this moment… In the sweetness of her dreams, her father was making his solitary way toward his end, soon to be parted from her forever. A child who had just lost her mother and was about to lose her father โ what fate would await her from now on?
My Xiaoxiao and Che’er โ are you sleeping peacefully at this moment too, I wonder? I have not seen you in so many days.
My vision went blurry and stinging. Having survived so many mortal perils, having walked over the flesh and blood of so many โ all of it had finally bought a family reunion. This campaign of conquest and slaughter had to be reaching its end.
I had witnessed far too many women and children sacrificed at the altar of power. My own children would never repeat such a tragedy. I wanted them to be the most fortunate children under heaven.
The imperial carriage came to a halt. I lifted the curtain and at once saw the dense black mass of iron cavalry blocking the road ahead. Banners emblazoned with the character “Xie” snapped and billowed in the morning wind.
At the head of the formation, a young general in silver helmet and red tassel rode his horse forward toward us, gallant and imposing.
“It is General Xiaohe!” Qinzhi looked up and cried out, a flush of rose-pink instantly rising to her cheeks.
Her bright, sparkling eyes reflected my weary smile. In that instant, a hundred feelings surged through my heart.
“Go.” I released her hand and let Qinzhi leap from the imperial carriage, running without a care toward that white-horse, silver-spear young man.
That scene at the foot of Huizhou City so long ago โ that same moment in the morning light โ so familiar, so distant… At that time, I too had been something like this, running like one possessed toward Xiao Qi’s horse.
The attending palace servants received the infant and helped me step down from the imperial carriage.
“This officer came too late to rescue Your Highness โ you were frightened, and for that I deserve death!” Xie Xiaohe dismounted and paid his respects.
With the great army arrived before me, the man I had longed for so near at hand, imperial glory and dominion within reach โ yet what lay before my eyes was still a blurred vision of bloodied corpses, the palace towers near and far crumbling and collapsing through billowing smoke, the recently dead with bones not yet cold, a newborn still in swaddling clothes. My heart could not muster the slightest elation โ only exhaustion and sorrow.
“Mother Consort, are you unhappy? Father Prince has come back to save us!” Qinzhi clasped my hand tightly, her eyes bright and eager. She glanced over at Xie Xiaohe. “With Brother Xiaohe here, Mother Consort need not worry anymore!”
Xie Xiaohe smiled and nodded at Qinzhi, then raised his eyes to me with a look of quiet concern.
I gathered my composure and smiled at them both.
Noticing that behind me there was the Empress Dowager’s carriage but no imperial carriage for the Emperor and Empress, Xie Xiaohe asked in alarm, “The rebel army has broken through the palace gates โ has His Majesty escaped safely?”
I turned my face away. The rims of my eyes grew hot. “For the dignity of the imperial house, the Emperor and Empress chose not to flee. They vowed to stand or fall with the palace.”
The look in Zidan’s eyes at the moment of parting flashed before me. My chest tightened with a suffocating grief. I abruptly turned my face away and could speak no more.
The words I spoke to deceive Xie Xiaohe were false โ the sorrow was real.
To deceive Xiao Qi. To deceive the world. First, I had to deceive myself. From the moment I had let him go, I told myself he was already dead โ dead in the raging flames, turned to ash along with everything of the past.
Xie Xiaohe stood in respectful silence for a moment, then asked me and the Empress Dowager to follow the deputy general to the camp to take shelter. I nodded. I turned to climb back into the imperial carriage โ when suddenly a rider came galloping up, and the soldier on horseback swung down from the saddle and reported urgently: “The treasonous subject Song Huai’an fought to the last and refused to surrender. He led more than a hundred of his personal troops out through the Gate of Chongjie and fled south toward the southern suburbs. Commander-in-Chief Hu has left the city in pursuit. The rebellion within the palace has been suppressed. His Highness the Prince has reached the outer Gate of Chengtian.”
I exchanged a glance with Xie Xiaohe. Both of us were shaken.
Song Huai’an had been completely surrounded โ and yet he had still cut his way out of the palace city and escaped the net that Xiao Qi had cast.
With the palace rebellion now decided, I stopped and looked out at the palace towers obscured by thick smoke, and ordered my carriage to return to the palace.
Xiao Qi had reached the Gate of Chengtian. I wanted to wait for him in the hall of the son of heaven, to greet his return with my own eyes, to watch him with my own eyes as he stood sovereign over all under heaven.