The question Ge Fan had been thinking about most lately was: when exactly did he start to like Yu Jiuqi?

Clearly, at the beginning, he remembered being somewhat repulsed by Xiao Jiu.

When Meng Huihong and Yu Kaixuan had just started dating, Ge Fan and Xiao Jiu didn’t have much contact—they’d just eaten a couple of meals together with their parents. She was always smiling obediently, answering whatever the adults asked, speaking flawlessly. Those clever eyes of hers observed everyone without showing it, judging everyone’s preferences, then catering to them to make everyone satisfied. By the end of one meal, she’d be exhausted, having barely eaten anything herself.

At that time, Ge Fan was almost certain she couldn’t eat her fill at the dinner table, that nothing tasted good to her. Served her right—who told her to be so calculating, always scrutinizing people, so fake and affected. She deserved to live so exhaustingly.

When did he start to change his view of her?

It should have been the year Yu Kaixuan and Meng Huihong were preparing to get married.

Speaking of which, Xiao Jiu deserved the most credit for their successful marriage.

When they first proposed getting married, the most vehement opposition came from Wen Wen. Dating was one thing, but once married, Wen Wen was somewhat worried about the future distribution of interests in Wendu Shuihui. She didn’t care for herself—she wanted to ensure the bathhouse would all go to Xiao Jiu in the future. At that time, Yu Kaixuan was in his prime years without even one biological child of his own, and Meng Huihong was bringing along two children. Wen Wen felt there would be endless troubles ahead. She adamantly refused to let them marry, making a huge fuss, which made Meng Huihong lose face and Yu Kaixuan hesitate, nearly leading to a breakup.

Later, it was Xiao Jiu who worked on multiple fronts. She first told Wen Wen that if she was affecting Dad’s happiness, she’d rather have nothing at all, otherwise she’d feel guilty for the rest of her life. Then she told Meng Huihong, “Auntie, look, the root of this storm is because my mom and dad are considering my interests. That they could sacrifice like this for me, a child they picked up, shows they’re kind people, people with feelings and loyalty. This kind of family won’t fall apart easily.”

To this day, Ge Fan hasn’t figured out how Xiao Jiu discovered that what Meng Huihong feared most was the family breaking apart. Although she’d been married three times and divorced twice, seemingly coming and going freely and carefree, he knew very clearly that Meng Huihong had been deeply hurt in these separations and unions, leaving her with tremendous guilt she could neither make up for nor undo.

But Ge Fan at the time was more concerned with another question. He always felt that this girl being so understanding and proactive about her father’s remarriage must have some selfish motive, so he asked her directly. By then they’d become familiar, and Xiao Jiu readily said of course she had selfish motives.

Then she smiled again, that smile revealing two shallow dimples, and generously said, “It’s for my dad! I can tell Auntie Hong loves him very much. My dad is so good—he should find a wife who loves him, to experience what it’s like to be loved in a marriage.”

Ge Fan was extremely shocked at the time, one could even say shaken. He couldn’t articulate exactly what he felt, just that from then on, he looked at Yu Jiuqi differently.

Later, everyone said Yu Xiao Jiu was lucky and happy—with that kind of background, yet she became the cherished darling of this well-off big family. But only the family members knew clearly that this bizarre family, where not a single member was easy to deal with, was essentially pieced together by her.

She deserved that favoritism.

But Ge Fan didn’t have any other thoughts about her at that time. Within two years, he went to Shandong, spending three or four years in that nightmarish vocational technical school. After going through that period, he thought he’d lost interest in things like love, even felt life had no meaning, that he was worthless, a waste.

It was Xiao Jiu’s words that changed him.

Those few years, he didn’t know what Xiao Jiu had experienced, but her transformation was particularly drastic. The mask on her face grew heavier and heavier, her worries grew deeper and deeper. Sometimes he couldn’t bear it, and Ge Fan would unconsciously joke around to amuse her. Once he did, she’d laugh—though the smile didn’t last long, at least it was somewhat genuine.

Then Xiao Jiu said to him: “Brother, I think you’re pretty amazing.”

“What’s amazing about me?”

“You can make other people happy. How amazing is that, what ability.”

“Does that count as ability?” Ge Fan asked sincerely.

“Of course it does.” She thought of something, blinked. “Happiness is so good.”

“Are you happy then?”

Ge Fan later asked Xiao Jiu this question many times in different settings, with different tones, in different ways. Each time he got the exact same emotionless and unconvincing answer.

“I’m happy,” she would say.

Ge Fan didn’t believe it, but he thought it didn’t matter—since you say I have this ability, perhaps I can help you.

He admitted that later, when he made a name for himself at Le Sheng Huang, gathering friends in Shi City, even making short videos to entertain the masses, the initial origin was all from Xiao Jiu’s affirmation and his original intention to help her emerge from certain mental knots he couldn’t see through.

Then, by happy accident, he regained his confidence and enthusiasm.

Life is sometimes very interesting—you intend to heal others, but in the end, it’s yourself who gets nourished.

But even then, he still didn’t realize he liked Xiao Jiu.

What made him truly face this feeling he couldn’t voice was, ironically, Sun Xi’s appearance.

Now, thinking back, although Sun Xi didn’t do anything last time he came back, their past hadn’t been exposed, and Ge Fan had even foolishly believed these two people with completely opposite temperaments and personalities couldn’t possibly attract each other—yet somehow, subconsciously, he felt a sense of crisis.

But it was too late.

By the time he belatedly understood everything and wanted to fight for something, it was already too late.

He couldn’t compete with Sun Xi. He knew this in his heart.

No matter how sincere he was, how brave, no matter how much effort and patience he put in, no matter how well he planned a stable future, even if he swallowed his pride to seek approval from the parents—none of it could compare to that long, bone-deep adolescence they had experienced together.

Though he was also unwilling, jealous, prejudiced against Sun Xi, and believed they had no future—he found it hard to imagine just how deep the emotions and obsession must be to withstand the repeated defeats and rekindlings, collapses and rebuildings of what was almost a life-and-death bond.

He was somewhat envious.

Damn it, Ge Fan felt vexed again—am I speaking up for them?

How pathetic.

“Hiss.”

A sharp pain suddenly struck his face. He dodged, hazily coming back to his senses, realizing he was sitting in the lobby of a pharmacy.

“Brother.”

Ge Fan looked up and saw Xiao Jiu holding gauze and medicine, standing before him, looking down at him, smiling with pursed lips.

“Brother, your eye is pretty swollen. Maybe we should go to the hospital to get it treated.”

Ge Fan continued looking at Xiao Jiu, at the smile on her face. Though it was only faint and shallow, even a bit teasing, it carried a steady authenticity, completely different from the facade she usually put on.

He didn’t know when Xiao Jiu had changed.

Then his gaze shifted to see the person sitting in a corner by the pharmacy counter—that posture lazy but eyes dark and deep, that bastard who’d just fought him twice and still hadn’t determined a winner.

Ge Fan raised his hand and forcefully touched the corner of his eye. The pain gave his suddenly erupting temper more reasonable grounds.

Frowning, he said: “No need, it’s nothing. I’m leaving.”

He stood up, directly bypassed Xiao Jiu, called to Xiao Zhuang who was sticking band-aids on his face at the door, and said let’s go. But after pushing open the padded door curtain and walking out of the pharmacy a few steps, Ge Fan stopped, struggled for a moment, suddenly turned back, pushed the door open, and looked directly at that bastard.

“Want to drink?”

Sun Xi looked at him expressionlessly: “Sure.”

Xiao Jiu advised: “You really shouldn’t drink alcohol with those injuries on your faces.”

Ge Fan said: “I’m fine.”

Sun Xi also said: “I’m fine too.”

Not only did they drink, they drank two whole cases in one go.

Those two cases were almost entirely consumed by the two of them. Lin Hui didn’t touch a drop because he had to drive. Xiao Jiu was worried they’d cause trouble again so she didn’t drink either. Xiao Zhuang did drink a couple of rounds with them, but following their pace after just three or four bottles, he ran to the bathroom to throw up. It wasn’t that Xiao Zhuang’s alcohol tolerance was poor—these two were just playing too hard.

It wasn’t drinking, nor was it a competition. It was their third battle that they were determined to settle.

The table full of home-style dishes went untouched. They didn’t chat or talk. Beer bottles were pulled out one by one, opened and lined up beside them. They drank straight from the bottles, then neatly arranged the empties on the ground. Neither kept count, but their eyes constantly glanced at each other, neither willing to drink one bottle less than the other.

Childish, boring, even a bit stupid.

Yu Jiuqi had always disliked this kind of competitive, exaggerated drinking culture. Comparatively, Brother Er Kai’s style of bragging a bit when tipsy was more endearing. She thought Sun Xi also hated this kind of drinking competition, but sitting in the middle, watching the person with injuries on his lips opening yet another cold beer, she saw his eyes glowing bright and strong, refusing to yield even a fraction.

She’d tried to persuade them, tried to stop them, tried to change the subject by suggesting they chat. She especially wanted to talk to Ge Fan. Though she hadn’t figured out where to start, she just felt it was necessary to explain something to him.

Xiao Jiu wanted to tell him she wasn’t acting on impulse or being deliberately rebellious against the family. She didn’t want to fail or give up on anyone. Perhaps this sounded greedy and hypocritical, but she wanted to try.

But her topic hadn’t even unfolded yet, barely begun, when the brother on her left and the boyfriend on her right formed a united front, not engaging, treating her like air in unison, leaving her on the sidelines. She couldn’t be bothered to care anymore.

Later, she simply moved to an empty table behind them and played mobile games with Lin Hui to pass the time.

She didn’t know how much time passed. The night had grown very late. Xiao Jiu had her legs propped on a stool, head buried in passionate monster-slaying, when she suddenly heard a conversation related to her from the next table. She slowed her hand movements, still staring at her phone, letting her opponent kill her inch by inch, concentrating entirely on capturing the tense probing happening beside her.

The one probing was Ge Fan.

As if he’d been pondering for a long time, after much thought and internal struggle, at the moment when they still couldn’t determine a winner but the two cases of beer were almost empty, he asked the question he cared about most.

He asked: “What are your plans for the future? Staying in Shi City?”

Sun Xi said: “My KTV is already up and running.”

“You should know in your heart that staying isn’t that simple.”

“I know.”

“Haven’t thought about leaving?”

“I have.”

“Then why not leave?”

“Want to hear the truth?”

Ge Fan burped from the alcohol. He sounded very drunk already, saying don’t fucking waste words, I’m being real with you here.

Xiao Jiu started another game. She wore headphones but had them on mute. Her fingers just randomly swiped across the screen, also waiting for that answer.

“I wanted to take her away. Really wanted to take her away. I originally came back this time intending to take her away.” He paused, as if gathering some courage before continuing, his tone sounding calm and flat. “But that would be very selfish.”

Xiao Jiu frowned, her heart clenching with pain. She understood his meaning.

But Ge Fan didn’t: “Selfish?”

“Because that would put her in an impossible position.”

Ge Fan suddenly fell silent.

Sun Xi sighed lightly and continued: “She’s different from me. Her family, all of you—you care about her.”

“That time in the county, I could tell. The degree to which you fear losing her is probably no less than mine.”

“So I don’t want to force her to make a choice. Don’t want her to live with me in the future carrying the guilt of betraying her family.”

Yu Jiuqi’s gaze remained lowered on the screen, but her vision had already blurred.

Ge Fan sighed with feeling. Damn it, he really knows how to talk. Fine, you win. I accept defeat.

When Ge Fan had suddenly turned back from the pharmacy earlier, insisting on this drinking showdown, it was to ask this question. He knew he couldn’t change anything, didn’t want to do anything to humiliate himself or even damage his relationship with Xiao Jiu, but the prerequisite was he had to ensure one thing—ensure Sun Xi wouldn’t hurt her.

Using emotional blackmail to put someone in the torment of guilt and shame was a form of tremendous mental torture.

Now Ge Fan knew that the root of most of Xiao Jiu’s suffering in her previous life was this kind of mental torment. If Sun Xi continued to pull and pressure her, then essentially, he loved himself.

But looking at it now, Ge Fan gritted his teeth resentfully—this bastard really has something. No wonder he has a girlfriend.

It’s just that if he insists on staying, with Wen Wen and Brother Er Kai’s hurdles ahead—the hard days are still to come.

In a dizzy, muddled haze, Ge Fan called for Xiao Jiu. After calling twice, Xiao Jiu finally lifted her head from her phone and removed her headphones. Ge Fan said to her, we finished drinking, what was it you wanted to tell your brother earlier?

Xiao Jiu looked at Ge Fan silently for a while without speaking, then Sun Xi suddenly turned around.

A face drained of all color and a pair of bright red eyes—his gaze cautious and careful, yet also straightforward and frank, glistening wetly with a hint of shyness.

Xiao Jiu looked at his drunken appearance, circling carefully around it again and again. Her heart churned and staggered. Warmth and sourness simultaneously poured scalding into her heart, making her feel that saying anything more at this moment would be superfluous.

“I’m fine. Brother.”

She finally said.

Xiao Zhuang had already blacked out. Sun Xi also looked ridiculously drunk, furrowing his brow as he arranged for Lin Hui to drive his car and take Ge Fan and them back first. Then he suddenly remembered something and said he needed to get something from the car.

Lin Hui followed him out. Sun Xi took a set of keys from the drawer of the driver’s seat, turned around, and suddenly stared at Lin Hui behind him.

Lin Hui couldn’t help becoming vigilant. He could tell Sun Xi’s eyes were different from at the drinking table just now—like a sleeping wolf suddenly awakening, eyes carrying a warning.

He immediately understood what he was going to say.

Sure enough, Sun Xi said pointedly: “Don’t talk nonsense later, understand?”

Lin Hui nodded: “I understand.”

“Keep an eye on things with Tianjin.”

“Mm, they said after the New Year holiday they’ll call him a few times.”

Sun Xi observed him for another moment before seeming to relax a bit, saying let’s go, thanks for your hard work, take half the day off tomorrow.

Lin Hui silently breathed a sigh of relief in his heart, watching his departing back. Seeing him suddenly switch to a staggering, half-drunk appearance, he marveled that this new boss his uncle found for him—generous with money, capable in business, but his scheming was really too deep.

Lin Hui’s uncle was Xu Tian. It was Xu Tian who introduced him to Sun Xi, which is why Sun Xi treated him as a confidant.

Though Lin Hui was young, he was perceptive and worldly in handling matters. He knew he was just an employee—just listen and complete the work, no need to invest too much personal emotion, much less any need to get involved and pass judgment.

Though he knew that today’s affair, from beginning to end, was a setup targeting Ge Fan.

That debt owed to the Tianjin distributor was real, but Sun Xi had already paid it when taking over Le Sheng Huang. It’s just that a couple days ago he suddenly remembered this matter and ordered another batch of alcohol from the distributor, having them cooperate in this setup, pretending the debt still existed.

Actually, today’s fight, these several fights—they didn’t need to happen.

He deliberately wanted to fight.

This drinking session was also something he deliberately wanted to do.

Lin Hui even suspected that the rather moving words just now were also deliberately said by him.

Just who he was saying them for, that was unknown to him.

Ge Fan came out supporting Xiao Zhuang, his footing seemingly unsteady. Lin Hui quickly went forward to meet them, no longer pondering those matters that had nothing to do with him.

Back at the home-style restaurant, Sun Xi’s arm draped over Yu Jiuqi’s shoulder, his body leaning askew, all his weight given to her. His eyelids heavy, his breath wrapped in the strong smell of alcohol, he stood with her at the entrance, watching the others leave together.

Then Xiao Jiu rubbed his face. He seemed numb with no reaction, so she said maybe they should send him to Le Sheng Huang room 411 later.

Sun Xi didn’t want to go there, saying the KTV had no way to shower, and he reeked of alcohol. Should he go downstairs to the bathhouse?

Xiao Jiu rolled her eyes at him, asking where he wanted to go then.

“A hotel?” she asked.

“I checked out.”

“Open another room?”

“Don’t want to stay there.”

“Then where?”

“Go home.”

“What home?”

Then Sun Xi turned his head to look at her, his eyes seeping with threads and wisps of crimson brought out by alcohol, saying softly: “I rented an apartment.”

After speaking, he handed those keys to Xiao Jiu and gave her an address and unit number—it was an apartment-style complex in the city center, not far from Le Sheng Huang and Wendu Shuihui.

Xiao Jiu drove Yu Kaixuan’s car, taking the inebriated Sun Xi to the residential complex, helping him upstairs. The building was newly constructed in recent years, the environment very nice, the hallway spacious and warm. When they reached the door, while supporting Sun Xi with one arm, she struggled to open the door with the other.

Inside was pitch dark, but through the moonlight from outside she could see the living room was quite spacious. Xiao Jiu was about to turn on the light to look around when suddenly her feet left the ground as someone lifted her up.

Then he, familiar with the way, carried her, walked several steps to a room, kicked open the door, and gently tossed her onto the bed.

Then pressed down heavily on her.

Clothes were skillfully removed, two pieces, his hand reached inside. Xiao Jiu blocked once: “I want to look at your apartment.”

“What’s there to see?” He leaned over, voice hoarse.

“Just want to tour it.”

“Mm, okay, I’ll take you on a tour in a bit, we’ll go through each room.”

The sweater was pushed up, along with the bra also lifted. He kissed urgently, this time using some technique, patiently sucking and grinding, making her arch her legs, then pull them apart again.

Xiao Jiu leaned her head back, looking at the white ceiling, suddenly felt something was off. She grabbed his hair and asked: “Were you faking it, Sun Xi?”

It took him a long time to mumble: “Faking what?”

“Faking being drunk.”

Outside the window, moonlight thinly covered them. In the simply decorated room, everything was amorous. He didn’t answer, as if it wasn’t important, at least not important right now.

But since you asked, Sun Xi demanded of himself with what little rationality remained, I’ll answer you truthfully about everything.

To you, I won’t hide anything.

So after a long while, he turned her over, his hand pressing down forcefully beneath her body. The kisses falling on her shoulder also stung with pain, his hot breath spraying by her ear, answering her thrust by thrust, every sentence the truth:

“That’s right.”

“I was faking.”

“Leaving your brother some face.”

“Baby.”

“You should know.”

“I’m still far from drunk.”

He turned Xiao Jiu’s head around, staring at her beautiful eyes, kissing her fiercely at the most uncontrolled moment.

…

It was in another room, no bed, just a large sofa. Xiao Jiu finally lay in his embrace, head tilted back, breathing heavily and slowly. Her fingertips slowly traced along his arms wrapped around her chest, finely outlining the muscle lines that seemed covered with a layer of misty dampness.

Eyes burning bright, she blinked and asked quite seriously another question tangled in her mind:

“Sun Xi.”

“Mm.”

“When did you become like this?”

“Like what?”

“So cunning, devious, and a bit bad.”

“Maybe everyone changes.”

“When did you start changing?”

Sun Xi was silent for a while, lit a cigarette. Much of his rationality returned. After some hesitation, he still confided in her truthfully.

He said: “When life became unbearable.”