Yu Jiuqi hadn’t seen Wen Wen for over two weeks. Ever since she moved out, Wen Wen had been deliberately avoiding her, unilaterally giving her the cold shoulder.

The reason it was called unilateral cold war was because Xiao Jiu had more than once tried to communicate and make peace with her, only to hit a wall.

Around the Minor New Year, preparations for the Spring Festival began. Yu Kaixuan’s family always celebrated together, from New Year’s Eve to the second day of the new year they were basically together. The pressure of preparation fell on Meng Huihong—Wen Wen just needed to show up, but the home also needed to be tidied according to custom, which was usually done by Xiao Jiu.

This year was no different.

On Minor New Year’s Day, Xiao Jiu sent Wen Wen a WeChat message, photographing two sets of Spring Festival couplets and window decorations for her to choose from. Wen Wen didn’t respond but turned around and posted to her Moments. Xiao Jiu understood her little temper and patiently waited. After half a day, she still didn’t reply, yet in the family group chat she tagged Zhu Duomei, asking if they were drinking tonight. Zhu Duomei politely declined, saying drinking with you is no fun, you have no tolerance.

Xiao Jiu didn’t waste time with her, selecting a set herself. The next day, bringing the couplets home to paste them and clean the house, she sent Wen Wen a message just before reaching the neighborhood, asking if they were out of laundry detergent at home.

This time Wen Wen replied instantly, asking: 【You’re coming now?】 Xiao Jiu said: 【Almost there.】 She replied again: 【Have laundry detergent, not enough.】

Xiao Jiu bought some cleaning supplies downstairs before going up, knocking on the door. No answer. She unlocked and entered, seeing the home empty. But the just-cooked white fungus and red date porridge was still hot, the air still carried undispersed perfume scent, hastily changed shoes and clothes at the entrance piled messily—clearly a hasty escape, afraid of running into her.

Pretty funny.

After these days of upheaval and calm reflection, Yu Jiuqi also couldn’t say at which moment she suddenly stopped being troubled by the pressure Mom brought her, no longer anxious to cut ties. Rationally, she accepted that the life state where she and Mom had been tightly bound together for over twenty years must inevitably end. But emotionally, she still deeply cared about her, missed her.

Even knowing Mom was avoiding her, she still tracked her status through various means.

Including but not limited to asking Second Brother Kai and Auntie Hong obliquely, privately chatting with Manager Xiao Fu to gather information, passing by that cosmetics store she rarely visited for a few glances, and constantly monitoring her social media accounts, Moments, Weibo, even squatting in live stream rooms.

The twenty-sixth day of the twelfth lunar month, eight o’clock in the morning. Yu Jiuqi set her usual vibration alarm. After waking, she turned over, lying on the bed opening that Siberian tiger park live stream located two hundred kilometers away, muting it, rubbing her eyes. She didn’t really watch the fluffy tiger cubs just waking up on the screen but stared at the scrolling comments below.

Seriously, focused, not missing a single interaction.

Not even knowing when the person beside her woke up, lazily clinging over.

Until a slightly calloused hand circled around the blanket, expertly drilling into her clothes, circling upward along her body. That plain ring scraped there, sensitive and erect. Xiao Jiu hummed softly, wanting to dodge, but that hand applied some force. Along with the arm tightening, the person also grunted, pressing on her shoulder.

The blanket was thick, the heating sufficient. Xiao Jiu only wore a camisole nightgown. He was bare-chested, avoiding that thin strap, burning hot, slowly kissing forward from her back, sliding all the way to her shoulder. Seeing she was still staring at her phone, his hand involuntarily pressed harder, drowsily glancing a few times.

“Who’s Mengmeng?” He asked hoarsely at her shoulder.

Xiao Jiu tapped the screen: “That one, the little tiger that hasn’t woken up yet.”

Sun Xi looked at the scrolling comments below the live stream again: “What about Er Maitai?”

Xiao Jiu pointed at another: “That one, the one with black stripes on its face.”

“Called Er Maitai just because of black stripes?”

“No, because it likes rolling in the mud since young.”

Sun Xi squinted, looking past that thin shoulder at his girlfriend’s profile as she focused on the Siberian tiger breeding live stream. He also saw a glaring account in the comments frantically spamming, calling the keeper to point the camera at those two little tigers just mentioned.

A wave of doubt arose in his heart, so he asked: “This ‘Dongning Street Spicy Tiger Mom’—that’s not you, is it?”

Xiao Jiu turned her head, looking at Sun Xi like looking at an idiot.

Sun Xi asked: “What?”

Xiao Jiu rolled her eyes at him: “Did you see me typing?”

“Then who is it?”

“My mom.”

“Who?”

“Wen Wen.”

Sun Xi’s hand paused, eyes flickering, deflating.

‘Dongning Street Spicy Tiger Mom’ was an account Wen Wen specifically created to watch Siberian tiger cub live streams. Every day on time morning and evening, virtual feeding, crazily interacting with the keeper host, even sharing many life trivialities. Watching live streams became her emotional outlet, and also Xiao Jiu’s channel for understanding her status.

Seeing Sun Xi completely awake, Xiao Jiu glanced at him, turning up the phone volume, hearing the chatty host currently chatting with Wen Wen in the comments.

Because so early only she was spamming the screen, it was almost one-on-one public conversation.

That host responded to Wen Wen’s interaction: “Yes, Er Maitai has gotten fatter these two days. Er Maitai, did you hear? Your mom says you’ve gotten fat. Eating every day, standing up like a pig. We’re tigers, not piglets!” Then turning to ask Wen Wen, “Sis, when are you driving over to visit?”

Below, Dongning Street Spicy Tiger Mom replied: 【Too far, I don’t like long-distance driving.】

The host said: “Have your partner drive then, that one you mentioned last time, the partner younger than you.”

Wen Wen replied: 【Not dating anymore.】

The host asked: “What happened? Changed partners?”

Wen Wen replied: 【Broke up.】

The host asked: “Why?”

Yu Jiuqi never expected squatting in the live stream room would lead to such explosive gossip. Staring at the scrolling comments, holding her breath, after several long seconds, Wen Wen finally answered.

【He wanted to get married.】

【I wasn’t willing.】

The host asked: “Isn’t marriage good? Why not willing?”

After even longer seconds, Wen Wen replied: 【Someone like me, better not harm others.】

Yu Jiuqi’s head buzzed, sinking heavily. Those few words sharply stabbed into her eyes, then pierced her heart. For an instant she hoped this was a joke Wen Wen made, that excuse also her momentary slip of tongue.

That host was quite warm-hearted, continuing to persuade. Wen Wen said nothing more, directly exiting the live stream room.

Xiao Jiu felt an indescribable sadness. Turning her head, she happened to meet Sun Xi’s gaze moving over from the phone screen. He also saw it but didn’t comment, withdrawing his hand, turning back, lying on the pillow.

He looked at the ceiling, gazing at a small yellowed stain on the lamp shade—faint yet impossible to ignore, like the worry he just captured from Xiao Jiu’s eyes.

Sunlight had already filled the bedroom. He blinked, raising his hand to gently pinch his nose bridge.

Xiao Jiu was anxious all that day, several times taking out her phone to contact Wen Wen, repeatedly organizing excuses and language, wanting to understand more, yet feeling Mom wouldn’t easily share her true feelings during this cold war period—most likely she’d hit another wall.

So that evening, when Manager Xiao Fu sought her help with rare anxious tone, Xiao Jiu agreed immediately without a second word.

When Manager Xiao Fu called, Xiao Jiu and Sun Xi were driving west to eat dinner. They had arranged to gather with Xu Tian and several friends. Manager Xiao Fu said he and Wen Wen were currently at that dance hall they frequented. The dance hall wasn’t far from the dinner location, so Xiao Jiu had Sun Xi drop her at the dance hall first while he went to the appointment alone.

Sun Xi said nothing. After dropping Xiao Jiu off, he also got out of the car.

Xiao Jiu crossed the car hood, glancing at the person who got out with her. In the dark night, his eyes were brightly burning, looking at her resolutely.

Sun Xi only said: “I won’t go in. I’ll wait for you outside.”

Yu Jiuqi was very familiar with this dance hall. Wen Wen had danced here since young. Xiao Jiu had come here countless times to find her, accompany her, wait for her, witnessing her learn Latin, tango, and waltz one by one, witnessing her many boyfriends appearing and disappearing, and her passions following trends in different eras.

Xiao Jiu occasionally didn’t understand the contradictions in Wen Wen. She was someone who had passed a death sentence on herself. She was pessimistic, radical, always fighting this world in a way willing to perish together. Yet simultaneously, she threw herself into life’s brilliant adventures with incomparably free and passionate state, again and again.

Thoroughly, with full effort.

Perhaps because of this contradictory nature—like innocence and sexiness appearing in her simultaneously—she became charming, charismatic.

But suddenly, walking toward that rehearsal room at the corridor’s end, Xiao Jiu remembered that sentence seen in the live stream room this morning, that excuse, those few short words hammering her like a cold fist.

That wasn’t something Mom would normally say.

After glancing at the tall figure waiting at the corridor entrance, trapped in dim light, Xiao Jiu turned back, pushing the door, walking into the noisy rehearsal room.

Inside stood several people scattered, mostly dancing teammates. The several square meters of space was decorated completely full of romance—coordinated flowers, balloons, banners, gifts. On the table by the entrance was a high-end brand ring box, plus two large Japanese tickets.

Xiao Jiu looked carefully—tickets for Tokyo concert next month, Taylor Swift, Wen Wen’s current favorite singer. Going to see her concert was the biggest wish Wen Wen had mentioned for a long time.

And clearly, from the scene’s chaos, weirdness, and varying degrees of awkwardness on everyone’s faces, Manager Xiao Fu’s carefully prepared, sincere proposal ceremony had ended in failure.

“Why did you come?”

Wen Wen turned her head, fluffy long hair swinging behind her. Seeing Xiao Jiu at the door, her eyes settled on her face. Beyond surprise, revealing a trace of panic she hadn’t hidden in time.

She immediately looked at Manager Xiao Fu opposite, hiding that panic: “You brought her here?” Then switching to that unreasonable domineering manner, “Bringing her here is useless. She can’t control me.”

“I didn’t ask her to control you.”

Manager Xiao Fu specifically wore a thick wool suit, hair styled meticulously. In such an awkward situation, his tone remained gentle, actually having a maturity beyond his years.

“Then why did you call her here?” Wen Wen appeared childish and straightforward.

“Xiao Jiu.” Manager Xiao Fu called her.

Xiao Jiu looked back, guessing his so-called request for help on the phone was probably asking her to help speak well. She had never interfered in Wen Wen’s romantic matters before, respecting her wishes through all the breakups and reunions. Even though her impression of Manager Xiao Fu gradually improved, she might not necessarily have an effect. But unexpectedly, Manager Xiao Fu looked at her seriously, asking a question that instantly threw her off balance.

“Xiao Jiu, do you think she’s a good person?”

Xiao Jiu froze there. Wen Wen exploded, cursing at the opposite side: “Are you sick?”

Manager Xiao Fu ignored her, asking Xiao Jiu again: “Do you think she’s a good mother?”

Xiao Jiu vaguely realized something. Before she could respond, Wen Wen cursed again: “You really are sick, what’s the point of asking her these things!”

“There is a point.” Manager Xiao Fu got a bit angry, looking at Wen Wen. “Because I don’t accept that reason.”

Then calming down a bit, rubbing his hands, saying: “You can refuse me with other reasons. Even using age, family not supporting, personality incompatibility saying you don’t want marriage is fine. But you saying you’re not a good person—I don’t accept that.”

Yu Jiuqi suddenly looked at Mom, eyes widening, chest aching dully.

Wen Wen tensed her small face, forcefully squinting her eyes, as if making a difficult decision, saying to Manager Xiao Fu: “Whether I’m a good person or not, can’t you tell after all this time? Are you blind? Everyone knows, Stone City knows. Anyone who’s had anything to do with me, from past to present, haven’t I screwed over enough of them? What good person goes around harming others one by one!”

Manager Xiao Fu wouldn’t listen, looking at Xiao Jiu: “Xiao Jiu, you say…”

Wen Wen snatched the words: “You asked the right person. I screwed her over worst of all.”

Xiao Jiu looked at Wen Wen, barely opening her mouth: “Mom…”

Wen Wen immediately looked over sharply, one glance interrupting her, then locking onto her daughter’s eyes, taking a light breath, hardening her heart, carrying deliberate coldness and self-mockery, continuing to say a heart-wrenching speech.

Both listing for Manager Xiao Fu evidence of how terrible she was, and summarizing the huge gulf coldly suspended between mother and daughter during this period.

She said: “As a mother, I only consider myself. Want to divorce, I divorce. Want to do something, I do it. Never considering her. I’ve even hit her, scolded her, caused her trouble.”

“I won’t let her stay with her dad, won’t let her leave home, won’t let her stay in the big city, also won’t let her date, especially can’t date people I hate.”

“I made her live cautiously, inconsistent inside and out, pleasing others everywhere to survive…” Pausing, voice trembling, “I made her suffer, made her unhappy…”

“It’s me as the mother who made her unable even to love herself!”

“Am I a good person? Really!”

“Am I a good mother?”

“Marrying someone like me, are you stupid?” Wen Wen turned to Manager Xiao Fu, shouting, “Wake up!”

Yu Jiuqi’s heart was being cut like knives. Every word and sentence was like cutting knives in her heart. Before Manager Xiao Fu could speak, Xiao Jiu stepped forward, wanting to say something. But before she could open her mouth, Wen Wen turned around, brushing past her shoulder, walking out.

The door wasn’t closed. High-heeled leather boots stepping on cement tiles, tapping circling in the corridor. Her unique powder fragrance echoed over. Xiao Jiu followed the familiar sound and scent, chasing after.

At the corridor’s end, Wen Wen immediately saw Sun Xi, seeing he had heard everything.

“Mom!”

Xiao Jiu called from behind.

Wen Wen resolutely left.

Wen Wen’s already-repaired Camry was parked at the dance hall entrance, but she bypassed it, not driving, walking straight toward the thick night ahead. Every two meters, the landscaping trees were draped with Spring Festival colored lights, brilliantly flickering. She walked rapidly against the wind, that sheepskin fur coat on her body rustling and trembling, carefully flamboyant.

Xiao Jiu followed that flamboyance all the way, chasing after. At this moment she finally understood—it was her cruel cutting words that deeply wounded Wen Wen, making her so negative and gloomy.

She felt intense self-blame and heartache, because her original intention was never to hurt Mom.

Never expected to hurt her so deeply.

Half a street later, seeing Wen Wen in high-heeled boots climbing Stone City’s highest overpass, Xiao Jiu suddenly became afraid. She looked back. Manager Xiao Fu was falling behind, so she glanced at Sun Xi closely following beside her.

Sun Xi immediately understood, running ahead, up the overpass. Xiao Jiu followed, seeing Wen Wen standing in the middle of the overpass, stopping, seeming about to walk toward the railing. She cried out in alarm, “Mom!”

Before Wen Wen could react, Sun Xi stepped forward, grabbing her arm and pulling her over.

Wen Wen turned back. Seeing it was Sun Xi, she fiercely shook him off. Looking over again, seeing her daughter standing two meters away, breathing heavily. Perhaps because that speech just now had already torn open their rift, she pursed her lips, without concealment, shedding tears.

Xiao Jiu’s heart ached. Her eyes burned hot. She forcefully held back, feeling necessary to explain something to Mom, slowly walking forward.

Manager Xiao Fu also caught up. Seeing the mother-daughter atmosphere, he stopped to the side, not coming forward.

Xiao Jiu walked while saying: “Mom, that wasn’t what I meant that night.”

Wen Wen choked, carrying deep sorrow: “You said you’d rather I hadn’t picked you up then—did I hear wrong!”

Sun Xi beside them shook, looking at Xiao Jiu.

Xiao Jiu’s face trembled, shaking her head continuously, unable to speak.

Wen Wen asked again: “Just how much do you hate me? Just how much have I failed, making you wish you’d never lived in this world!”

Xiao Jiu shook her head: “No Mom, that’s not what I meant.”

Wen Wen glanced coldly at Sun Xi, asking again: “And I don’t understand, Yu Jiuqi. You say you’re starting to love yourself. Loving yourself means choosing a man?”

“Loving yourself means not wanting me, wanting him!”

Xiao Jiu had already walked to Wen Wen’s side. But complex emotions made her chest swell with sourness, unable to say a word. She wanted to hold Mom’s hand—Wen Wen shook her off. She wanted to embrace Mom’s arm—Wen Wen broke free. Helpless, she grabbed Mom’s sleeve, hem of clothing. In the tugging, she knelt down.

On the overpass with only four of them, under the night sky near Spring Festival, in the cold wind, Yu Jiuqi crying, knelt down before Wen Wen.

Sun Xi stepped forward slightly, looking down at her in heartache, not moving.

Xiao Jiu struggled to raise her head, gripping the clothing hem, just crying like that for a while before seeming to stabilize her emotions, looking at Mom. Following her heart-rending questions just now, incoherently, instinctively, without embellishment, pouring out her heart.

“Mom, I’m extremely grateful you saved me then, let me live. I’ve indeed had times living very tired, but beautiful and happy times are more, because of you all, you and Dad. You did everything possible, gave me so much love, so much that once made me anxious, made me greedy, afraid of losing. That’s why I worked so hard to be a good child. I wanted to deserve your love.”

“Yes!” Xiao Jiu seemed to suddenly understand something. “So for so many years, I felt everyone was important, just not me. I wanted to satisfy everyone, but I didn’t matter.”

“Mom, I understand now. I never loved myself. It’s not because of you—it’s my own problem.”

“It’s the cage I built for myself.”

“But now I can do it. I can respect myself first. I need to feel I’m important first, then I can see clearly what’s important to me. I need to love myself first before I can love others.”

“Mom,” Xiao Jiu forcefully pulled Wen Wen, looking up at her, “Sun Xi is very important to me. You’re also very important to me.”

“I’m not choosing between you. You’re equally important to me. I love him, and I love you very much too.”

Wen Wen lowered her head, tearfully looking at Xiao Jiu, eyes cautious and probing, as if not believing her words.

Xiao Jiu said again: “Really Mom, I love you. I love you very much. I don’t love you because you saved me, raised me, gave me a very good home and an extremely great father. I don’t love you because of gratitude and guilt. Just because you are you.”

“Because you’re my mom, I love you unconditionally.”

Wen Wen suddenly covered her face, crying out loud.

Sun Xi beside them turned his head away, facing the wind.

Xiao Jiu gasped two breaths, finally emphasizing again.

“Mom, that sentence was said in anger. I’m very satisfied with my life. All the love, hate, hardship and sweetness—I’m satisfied with all of it.”

“I love my life. I’m grateful to be alive.”

Under the overpass a freight truck drove past, making an urgent loud horn sound, cutting through the silent winter night. Cold wind attacked in waves, unhurried and measured, rolling up that sentence, circling once, scattering out, scattering into the hearts of those who needed it.

I love my life. I’m grateful to be alive.

And the origin of all this, the credit, the grace, is all because of you.

Being able to make a once-abandoned, dying life become so beautiful, beautiful enough to heal others—as the hero, you are naturally a good person.

A good mother.

Wen Wen reached out, pulling Xiao Jiu up.

Holding those few ice-cold fingers, rubbing them, gripping them in her palm.

It was after that cold wind stopped, when night returned to quiet, Wen Wen smoothed her scattered hair, looking at a lighthouse somewhere far away lighting up. Suddenly remembering Xiao Jiu’s first birthday banquet, those three hopes she had spoken.

Then her gaze shifted, looking at Sun Xi leaning on the overpass railing. She still couldn’t stand his face, but in the dark night, his features seemed to blur somewhat.

Wen Wen sighed long, suddenly realizing those three hopes—hoping my daughter would be safe, happy, and always loved—she had tried her utmost to achieve them but failed utterly.

Perhaps, truly letting go a little was the only way to realize them.

“Sun Xi.”

Everyone was startled hearing this calm call.

Sun Xi straightened his body, looking at Wen Wen, seeing the fragility in her solemn expression, as if pride when admitting defeat.

Wen Wen opened her mouth but paused, stuttering: “If you, if in the future you ever dare…”

Sun Xi immediately understood what she wanted to say. Surprised yet unable to bear it, immediately responding: “I know.”

Wen Wen stared at him, asking: “You know?”

Sun Xi said: “I know.”

So Wen Wen swallowed the first half of the sentence, spitting out the second half word by word, gritting her teeth fiercely: “…I’ll skin you alive, chew your bones to pieces, drink your blood dry, make you die in the most inhuman way.”

Sun Xi said: “I know.”

Wen Wen released Xiao Jiu, turning to leave.

Xiao Jiu chased two steps. Wen Wen said, don’t follow me.

Manager Xiao Fu, who had been standing behind all along, followed. Wen Wen said nothing.

Xiao Jiu watched Mom walk down the overpass, melting into the winter night, still flamboyant, proud, never looking back.

She suddenly fully realized—the bond that had tied her and Mom together since the day they met, deeper than flesh and umbilical cord, had to some extent been severed.

They had finally become independent yet intimately supporting individuals.

At this moment, a powerful arm came around, embracing her neck, hooking her to his side, kissing the top of her head.

Xiao Jiu, carrying a surge of sourness, turned back, raising her eyes.

Meeting a patch of warmth and radiance.

Suddenly immense gratitude and appreciation—grateful we persevered until now, grateful fate circled round and round, merciful and beautiful.