HomeAfter I Bloom Hundred Flowers DieChapter 576: Forgiving Others is Forgiving Oneself

Chapter 576: Forgiving Others is Forgiving Oneself

Although Madam Tao grew up under traditional constraints on women, her abilities in supporting her husband, educating her children, and managing household affairs were unmatched. Like when she first heard about Lady Xiao and couldn’t maintain her composure, leading to premature labor – though she could have been saved and lived three to five more years, she resolutely chose death.

This was because she knew only her life could permanently humble Lady Xiao and turn His Majesty’s righteousness into guilt, thus maximally protecting her children’s future interests.

She had thought of everything then. Since Shen Yueshan and Lady Xiao had already consummated their relationship, although the chances of pregnancy were small, it couldn’t be ignored, so she made early arrangements.

Madam Tan owed Madam Tao a life debt – Madam Tao had saved her from her husband’s beatings, arranged her divorce to escape that hell, and helped her find work in wealthy households to make a living and learn skills.

Only before her death did she write to Madam Tan, saying that if Lady Xiao wasn’t pregnant, so be it, but if she was, Madam Tan must use her skills to enter the Shen household and become the child’s wet nurse. Regardless of the child’s gender, there was no need to harm or spoil them – simply teach them to distinguish right from wrong.

“Mother…” Shen Xihe felt as if her heart had been struck hard. She was as shocked as when she’d learned that Madam Tao could have lived but chose to live three to five years less for the long-term benefit of her father and brother.

Those three to five years might have brought changes, but she never considered such possibilities.

“Father said that Mother acted this way because she didn’t hate this child. Since we are Mother’s children, we should have Mother’s tolerance,” Shen Yun’an said somewhat shamefully. “In this regard, I’m not as good as Youyou.”

From beginning to end, Shen Xihe had never hated Shen Yingruo or shown any resentment, but Shen Yun’an hadn’t gotten over that mental hurdle before learning of this matter.

“Youyou take after her mother.” Even Xiao Huayong had to admire his mother-in-law’s far-reaching wisdom and broad-mindedness.

“Forgiving others is forgiving oneself.” Shen Xihe recalled a calligraphy piece her mother had left behind, six characters written in Madam Tao’s hand.

Unless it was a matter of life and death, forgiving others was essentially forgiving oneself.

Like Shen Yun’an – before knowing this, he couldn’t accept Shen Yingruo’s existence, yet was constrained by blood ties to Shen Yueshan and couldn’t do anything about it. He could only feel uncomfortable inside – what good did it do besides torturing himself?

But once he got over that hurdle and no longer felt bothered by Shen Yingruo’s existence, his mind broadened and his troubles disappeared.

“When will Youyou take me to pay respects at Mother-in-law’s grave? I haven’t yet paid my respects as her son-in-law.” Since they were talking about Madam Tao, Xiao Huayong took the opportunity to express what had been on his mind.

He should pay respects to Madam Tao, who was buried in the Northwest. But for such matters, he had hoped Shen Xihe would bring it up first. However, they had been here for days and everything else had been resolved, yet Shen Xihe hadn’t mentioned it, leaving him somewhat disappointed.

If the mountain won’t come to me, I must go to the mountain.

“I had planned to wait until Brother’s wedding when we would take Qiaoqiao to pay respects – we could all go together,” Shen Xihe explained her real intention.

She had planned this way because of Xiao Huayong’s special status as Crown Prince. Traditionally, when a Crown Prince visited his in-laws, the parents-in-law bowed to their son-in-law – how could they accept bows from the Crown Prince?

Shen Xihe valued propriety and hadn’t considered specifically taking Xiao Huayong to bow and pay respects. But since they must pay respects, she had found a compromise – going together with her brother and sister-in-law. Then, neither Xiao Huayong nor she would be the focus, and they could simply pay respects without anyone being dissatisfied.

The unresolvable knot between the Northwest and the court meant that while Shen Yueshan’s generals had accepted Xiao Huayong, they still couldn’t accept him as Crown Prince. If Shen Xihe specifically took him to pay respects to her mother, it would be fine if Xiao Huayong knelt, but if he didn’t and the uncles learned of it, they would surely escalate it to the level of court officials looking down on Northwesterners.

Although Shen Xihe believed Xiao Huayong would kneel, she still didn’t want to risk potential trouble.

“A daughter-in-law is a daughter-in-law, a son-in-law is a son-in-law.” Xiao Huayong quickly understood Shen Xihe’s difficulty in considering everyone’s position. “When I’m here, I’m not the Crown Prince, just your husband.”

Since he put it that way, Shen Xihe said, “I’ll have Zhenzhu make preparations, and we’ll go see Mother tomorrow.”

Only then was Xiao Huayong satisfied.

Meanwhile, Shen Yingruo received replies from both Shen Yueshan and Shen Xihe, each containing just one sentence.

Shen Yueshan: Marriage concerns a lifetime, consider it carefully and seriously.

As a father, whether for Shen Xihe or Shen Yingruo, he didn’t interfere with whom they wanted to marry – the choice was entirely theirs.

Shen Xihe: A Shen woman does not yield to force, does not compromise, and does not go against her heart.

Shen Yingruo finished reading Shen Yueshan’s letter, then stared at Shen Xihe’s for a very long time, until tears welled up in her eyes, though she ultimately didn’t let them fall.

Not accepting coercion, not allowing oneself to compromise, not making decisions against one’s heart – this was the privilege of Shen family women.

Her elder sister was telling her that as long as she bore the Shen name, the Shen family would support her.

While Shen Xihe and Xiao Huayong were enjoying their honeyed days in the Northwest, the court was in chaos. Several promising candidates for Minister of War had successive incidents, with private matters and blemishes being exposed. Pei Zhan’s body wasn’t yet cold, and the court was already fighting red-eyed.

Emperor Youning nearly fainted from anger during morning court one day.

Someone was stirring up trouble, but no one could figure out who, because no one showed signs of benefiting like a fisherman, nor did anyone stick their head out to meddle. It was as if someone was purely using the Minister of War position to make everyone red-faced and embarrassed, but not for personal gain.

No one believed that someone would cause so much trouble without wanting the Minister of War position, which effectively concealed the puppet master Xiao Changqin.

Xiao Huayong wasn’t in a hurry to return, not wanting to get involved with these murky affairs, letting Xiao Changqin cause havoc while His Majesty couldn’t push the matters to him to handle.

In May, as Shen Yun’an’s wedding approached, the entire Northwestern royal city was decorated in red, filled with celebration, as if every household was simultaneously celebrating a wedding.

Standing on a wall, watching this scene, Xiao Huayong said to Shen Xihe, “It still doesn’t compare to your brother’s wedding.”

“You already put much thought into our wedding.” Shen Xihe was very satisfied with their wedding, given the protocols required by the Crown Prince’s status.

Xiao Huayong wrapped his arm around Shen Xihe’s shoulders: “Though I might be slightly inferior to your brother in the wedding ceremony, my betrothal gift surely surpasses his.”

“Betrothal gift?” Shen Xihe thought for a moment – indeed, the Crown Prince’s betrothal gifts could only be exceeded by the Emperor and Empress.

Knowing she had misunderstood, he looked up at the flourishing Northwest: “Clearing the Northwest – that’s my betrothal gift to you. Are you pleased?”

Facing the wind at the city gate, Shen Xihe looked at the tall, jade-like Xiao Huayong with his composed expression, and smiled sweetly: “I’m pleased, very pleased indeed.”

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