“Temporarily… appealing?” Shen Yunʼan was speechless.
He looked at Shen Xihe carefully. She spoke of marriage with such detachment, without any trace of shyness, as if discussing something completely trivial.
Mo Yuan, constrained by Shen Xihe’s authority, had only said she changed her mind to marry the Crown Prince, nothing more.
Shen Yueshan and Shen Yunʼan assumed Shen Xihe had somehow met the Crown Prince and developed mutual affection. Otherwise, she wouldn’t have stolen evidence from Xiao Changying’s hands to give to the Crown Prince.
Originally, learning that Shen Xihe favored the Crown Prince, Shen Yueshan was furious – angry that the Crown Prince had ill intentions, somehow seducing his precious daughter. But knowing Shen Xihe’s stubborn nature, if they forcibly separated them after she had given her heart, with her fragile constitution, she might not survive the distress. Shen Yueshan had no choice but to grudgingly accept it.
This time when Shen Yunʼan received imperial permission to visit the capital, he intended to thoroughly investigate this Crown Prince.
Now it seemed things were completely different!
“Youyou.” Shen Yunʼan snapped back to reality, extremely worried. “You… have no feelings for the Crown Prince?”
Shen Xihe took a sip of water, and gently set down the cup, her bright eyes clear and profound: “None.”
That simple word made Shen Yunʼan’s heart feel as if it had been plunged into ice water. His throat grew dry: “Youyou, who? Who hurt you?”
The man’s eyes tinged red, his back tense like an enraged lion ready to pounce and tear his enemy to pieces.
In his view, his sister had been innocent and carefree. If she hadn’t experienced heartbreak, how could she have no girlish expectations of marriage?
It had become so severe that she seemed indifferent to whom she married. Shen Yunʼan’s heart ached intensely, wanting to tear this person to pieces!
Understanding her brother’s assumption, warmth filled Shen Xihe’s heart. She placed both hands on his wrist: “Brother, I’ve never given my heart to anyone. Otherwise, how could you still see me well and alive?”
With Shen Xihe’s constitution, if she had truly been hurt by love, how could she have survived?
Only then did Shen Yunʼan suppress some of his emotions. His cold gaze swept over Beiyu, Hong Yu, and the others, then softened when meeting Shen Xihe’s eyes, still cautious: “Really?”
“Really.” Shen Xihe nodded solemnly.
Shen Yunʼan finally loosened his clenched fist: “If so, why…”
“Brother, I’ve been weak since childhood, unable to handle emotional fluctuations, always reserved,” Shen Xihe showed a peaceful smile. “In the Northwest, I feared worrying you and Father, and naturally was coquettish and clingy before you, but my heart has always been this detached.”
Shen Yunʼan clenched his jaw, muscles tensing.
“Brother, I have you and Father, Grandfather, and Uncle’s love. You are all my blood relatives, I trust you. But I won’t trust an outsider,” Shen Xihe said softly. “I think in this life, I probably cannot fall in love…”
She knew how cold-hearted she was. Bu Shulin said she wasn’t as heartless as she thought, but that was just his partiality.
The examples Bu Shulin listed were merely within her principles of conduct.
“Youyou…” Shen Yunʼan’s eyes reddened again, this time not from anger but deep pain.
Seeing him like this, Shen Xihe’s fine brows furrowed as she clutched her chest: “Brother, don’t be like this, I feel unwell.”
“Youyou, what’s wrong?” Shen Yunʼan jumped up in fright, supporting her shoulders while shouting at Hong Yu and the others, “Doctor, call the doctor—”
“No need.” Shen Xihe stopped him, gripping his hand. “Brother, see? I care for you and Father. Your slightest worry makes my heart ache. Like this, how could you trust me to give my heart to a man?”
Shen Yunʼan froze.
Indeed, his sister couldn’t bear distress or shock. If she truly developed feelings for a man, wouldn’t she suffer and worry for him? How many times could her heart endure such torment?
“Youyou, return to the Northwest. Brother will marry the princess…”
If someone must be a royal hostage, it should be him!
“Brother, you’re not a child, don’t be foolish.” Shen Xihe scolded him sternly. “Don’t you care about your marriage? Don’t you care about the Shen family’s legacy? Don’t you care about the soldiers who’ve followed the Shen family? Don’t you care about the commoners who’ve been cleared of suspicion? Can you not care about the blood shed for the Northwest’s current peace?”
“I don’t care!” Shen Yunʼan almost howled. “My sister, forced to such a state, why should I care about these things? Youyou, brother only wants you to live well, happily, each day…”
His words stunned Shen Xihe. The feeling of being loved and cared for was so warm. A happy smile bloomed on her face: “But I care. I also want my brother and father to be happy every day. I’m not crying, nor am I unwilling or forced. If I truly returned to the Northwest, and you stayed in the capital to marry the princess, I think my days would have no purpose. I would die of depression.”
“Youyou!”
“Brother.” Her gentle voice interrupted him. “Haven’t you noticed I’m happier here than in the Northwest?”
Shen Yunʼan choked. He had noticed. In the Northwest, she always lacked vitality, weak and melancholic. They thought it was just her sensitive nature due to her weak constitution.
Seeing her again now, her eyes held a vibrancy absent in the Northwest, spirited and bright, like the moon emerging from clouds, radiating so brilliantly one dared not look directly at her.
“Here, I’m needed. I have hope and purpose to live for.” Shen Xihe raised her head, her bright eyes meeting Shen Yunʼan’s. “Brother, this is where I belong. For you all, I will live more diligently and happily.”
Cold tears slid from Shen Yunʼan’s eyes, his hands trembling with heartache.
“Brother, do you want to make me sad?”
Seeing Shen Xihe frown, Shen Yunʼan hastily wiped his tears, giving her a foolish smile.
“Pfft.” Shen Xihe couldn’t help but laugh.
The depressing atmosphere dissipated. Shen Xihe handed Shen Yunʼan a cup of hot water. He held it: “You chose the Crown Prince because you think he’s… easy to control?”
Shen Xihe shook her head slightly: “He’s not one easily controlled. I chose him because he… won’t live long.”
“Pffft—” Shen Yunʼan spat out the water he’d just drunk, choking severely. “Keh-keh-keh…”
Shen Xihe took a handkerchief from Beiyu and passed it to him, her gaze somewhat reproachful.
Shen Yunʼan grabbed the handkerchief and wiped it messily, looking at her as if seeing a ghost: “You… say that again.”
“Short-lived.” Shen Xihe repeated.
Duanming, mistaking itself for being called, immediately bounded over: “Meow!”