It was the same café they had visited before. The decor remained unchanged. Whether by coincidence or not, Fu Shize walked to the spot where they had once sat.
“Sit here. I’ll get you a menu,” Fu Shize said, pulling out a chair for her. He retrieved a small black book from the counter and handed it to Yun Li.
She flipped through it, finding limited options. “I’ll have cocoa milk.”
“Would you like the matcha mille-feuille for dessert?” Fu Shize suggested.
Yun Li nodded.
He calmly closed the menu and walked to the counter to place their order. Yun Li stared at his back, noting his composure. Her mind felt hazy.
After a breakup, there’s always a period of processing. During this time, you repeatedly question whether the decision to separate was too hasty. You replay various details, hoping for a different outcome. You reminisce about the sweet moments of the relationship, torturing yourself in the process. You long to regain what was lost, yet fear the anxiety of possession and loss.
During this processing period, Yun Li recalled many details. She realized that he had indeed cared for her deeply. As days passed without him reaching out, she also realized that perhaps he didn’t need her as much as she thought.
Gradually, only one conclusion remained. And she accepted it.
Fu Shize returned, pulling out his chair to sit down. He rested his hand on the armrest, leaning his upper body against the backrest.
At first, neither looked at the other.
After a moment of silence, they simultaneously raised their eyes to meet.
Yun Li nervously fidgeted with her fingers under the table, hidden from his view. She tried to appear as relaxed and casual as he did. “You’ve changed a lot…”
During their last encounter, she had been too reserved. She had always wanted to ask—
“How have you been?”
Though she hadn’t actively sought information over the past year and a half, she had wondered countless times. She hoped he was doing well, even without her.
Fu Shize looked at Yun Li. She had grown her hair long, permed, and dyed it, holding it back with a blue and white hairband that revealed her smooth, straight shoulders. She spoke slowly, her tone gentle.
He smiled. “Not bad. Life has returned to normal.”
Before they could say much more, a young man approached their table, greeting Fu Shize.
The man was friendly, asking cheerfully, “Senior, is this your girlfriend? She’s beautiful.” He turned to Yun Li, introducing himself. “I’m participating in the drone competition with your senior.”
Yun Li’s heart tightened. She nodded at him.
Fu Shize looked at Yun Li without answering.
The young man glanced at the empty seat at their table and grinned. “May I join you?”
Fu Shize chuckled, giving him a gentle push. “Go away.”
After the young man left, Fu Shize said to her, “I apologize. They like to joke around.”
“It’s fine,” Yun Li said, trying to appear unbothered. “People often joke like that with me too.”
Fu Shize’s hand paused as he reached for his coffee cup.
Realizing her words might be misunderstood, Yun Li added, “I mean when I’m with Yun Ye.”
Hearing this, Fu Shize’s brow relaxed. He asked, “What are your plans now?”
“I’m looking for a job in Xifu. My current internship should become permanent,” Yun Li said, holding her cup with both hands and looking up at him. “What about you?”
“I might go abroad for a postdoc position.”
Yun Li’s hands tightened on her cup. “Are you going alone?”
Fu Shize raised an eyebrow. “Who else would I go with?”
“I don’t know…” she said awkwardly. “It just seems difficult to go abroad alone.”
“It’s just me,” he pondered for a moment, staring at her. “I haven’t decided yet. I might stay in China. If I go abroad, I probably won’t come back.”
Yun Li didn’t catch his implied meaning and was momentarily stunned. “You won’t come back?”
“Mm-hmm.”
“Oh… that’s good,” she said, forcing a smile and lowering her head, feeling as if a hole had been punched through her heart. Trying to change the subject, Yun Li added, “I went to England for an exchange program last year.”
Fu Shize looked at her. “How was it?”
Yun Li spoke softly, “It was good… Though I had trouble adjusting for the first half of the year.”
“Tell me about it.”
Many people had asked Yun Li about her time in England, and she usually gave brief answers. But now, she wanted to tell him more. It didn’t seem like a big deal to share with him.
Yun Li considered for a moment. “When I first arrived, the first house I rented…”
She paused, as if suddenly realizing something, and explained sheepishly, “A lot happened. I’m trying to decide what to tell you.”
Fu Shize chuckled, patiently saying, “Take your time.”
“Wait a moment,” he said, standing up and returning from the counter with three slices of cake.
Yun Li protested, “We can’t finish all this…”
“We’ll eat slowly,” Fu Shize replied, tilting his head. “You can take your time telling me too.”
“Oh…” Yun Li took a bite of cake, looking into his deep eyes, momentarily lost in thought.
She quickly lowered her head and recounted her time abroad from start to finish, omitting the unpleasant parts.
“It was quite good,” she concluded with a smile. “I originally thought I wouldn’t survive on my own over there, but I was surprised by how strong my survival skills were.”
Feeling like she might be boasting, Yun Li’s smile turned shy. Fu Shize stared at her for a while, his lips curving into a smile as well.
“Would you like to see my lab?” Fu Shize asked. “It’s in this building.”
Caught off guard by the invitation, Yun Li had no reason to refuse and nodded.
As they reached the lab entrance, a young man rushed up to Fu Shize. “Senior, it’s terrible! My junior crashed the system!”
The young man looked terrified, his movements frantic as if a major disaster had occurred.
Noticing the person beside Fu Shize, he took a closer look and suddenly realized:
A woman.
A beautiful woman.
Standing very close to Fu Shize.
Meeting Fu Shize’s cool gaze, the young man quickly changed his tone. “Oh, it’s not a big problem.”
Fu Shize paused for a moment, then turned to Yun Li. “I’ll show you another time.” He tilted his head, asking gently, “Is that okay?”
Yun Li felt a bit disappointed but smiled. “Sure. It’s fine.”
The young front man suppressed a laugh, his gaze switching between her and Fu Shize. Feeling awkward, Yun Li hurriedly said, “I’ll be going now,” and headed towards the stairs. Before she had taken two steps, the young man’s voice echoed through five floors.
“Senior! Is that your girlfriend? Senior! When did you get a girlfriend?”
“She’s not.”
“Then is she someone you’re pursuing? Tell us about it! We can help you!”
“You’re so noisy.”
Yun Li stopped in her tracks. The young man continued chattering, but Fu Shize’s responses were no longer audible.
She stood there for a minute or two before continuing down the stairs, once again feeling that her thoughts were absurd.
The flat, gray road stretched out before her.
She momentarily forgot where she had parked her car and stared blankly at the road for a while.
Their reunion had no accusations or resentment towards each other, no lingering feelings or objections about their relationship, and no remnants of affection or excitement.
They sat down like old friends who hadn’t seen each other in a long time but were still familiar, talking quietly for two or three hours.
This should have been the best possible outcome for a reunion, shouldn’t it?
So why did she feel sad?
Yun Li’s nose stung with emotion.
…
This interlude didn’t affect Yun Li’s life. After returning home, she took Yun Ye and Yin Yunyi out for a weekend trip nearby before diving back into her busy work life.
Yun Li’s current internship was secured through a remote interview in England. She had only applied for positions related to her major. After receiving four offers, she chose a nine-to-five job and diligently completed her internship.
With just a month left before her permanent position evaluation, she felt a bit nervous.
Initially, Yun Li had wanted to be a full-time content creator, but this was strongly opposed by Yun Yongchang. He hoped she would have a regular job like most people and maintain a stable social circle.
She felt Yun Yongchang had a point. Her channel gradually shifted from lifestyle content to entertainment-style science popularization. Staying at home making videos for extended periods could make her feel out of touch with society.
In her previous two internships, Yun Li hadn’t gained much sense of achievement. Approaching graduation, like her classmates, she wanted to find a nine-to-five job with friendly colleagues and a good company atmosphere, allowing her more free time to pursue her interests.
Her routine life was fulfilling enough. Only at night, after finishing her videos for E-station and lying in bed lost in thought, would she think of Fu Shize.
Many of her elementary and middle school classmates were already married with children. Their parents all knew each other. Since Yun Li’s return from England, Yun Yongchang and Yang Fang had been busy arranging blind dates for her.
Yun Yongchang: [Your third aunt introduced a young man. He’s a local from Xifu, graduated with a master’s degree two years ago, and works as a civil servant.]
Yun Yongchang: [You must go meet him this time. You’re already 24. You need two or three years of dating.]
Yun Yongchang: [And that’s if things go smoothly. Your cousin has been on over twenty blind dates without finding anyone suitable.]
Yun Li looked at these messages with a headache. Despite refusing countless times, Yun Yongchang and Yang Fang remained enthusiastic.
Yun Yongchang: [Don’t be too proud.]
They thought simply that the introduced men weren’t good enough, which was why Yun Li refused to meet them.
Regarding family matters, Yun Li could only vent to Yun Ye: [It’s ridiculous. Don’t tell Mom and Dad about Yin Yunyi.]
Yun Li: [Otherwise, they’ll say, ‘Look, your brother is only 18 and already has a girlfriend.’]
Yun Ye: […]
Yun Ye: [It wouldn’t hurt to meet them. You might find someone suitable.]
Yun Li stared at this message: [Whose side are you on?]
Yun Ye: [Yours, of course.]
Yun Ye sent her a picture of a small group chat named ‘Encountering the Teaching Assistant’, with over twenty members. From the chat history, it was a fan group.
The most recent message was just posted: [The TA seems to be sick. Poor thing! What should we do?]
Attached was a photo of Fu Shize’s back at a hospital registration counter.
Yun Ye: [That guy seems unwell. Yun Li, do you want to go check on him?]
Yun Li: [Get lost.]
Extremely annoyed, Yun Li asked: [Is this a fan group?]
Yun Ye: [Yes.]
Yun Li: [Aren’t you a guy?]
Yun Ye: [Can’t men have idols? Can’t they be fans?]
Yun Ye: [Besides, I joined for your sake.]
Yun Li: […]
A colleague tagged her in a group chat to handle some files. Yun Li switched to that chat window. After completing her work tasks, her hand hovered over the mouse.
After a moment’s thought, Yun Li asked her supervisor for a half-day off.
Even as she drove toward Xike University Hospital, Yun Li felt her behavior was unconventional.
What was she trying to do?
After parking, Yun Li went straight to the registration area. Many people were queuing, but there was no sign of Fu Shize.
The hospital wasn’t large. She glanced at the department layout: internal and external medicine on the first and second floors, ophthalmology and dental on the third, and mental health on the fourth.
Fu Shize had stomach issues, so she first checked the internal medicine department but didn’t see him.
Second floor, third floor, still no sign of him.
As Yun Li headed towards the fourth floor, she stopped at the staircase landing, looking at the large blue characters spelling out “Mental Health Department” a dozen steps away.
She halted, remembering Fu Shize’s carefree smiles during their recent encounters. She hoped he was doing well.
She didn’t want to encounter Fu Shize here.
She shouldn’t have come in the first place.
Yun Li turned around, suddenly feeling uneasy. She had descended two steps when his tired voice came from above: “Li Li.”
Yun Li looked up. Fu Shize stood in front of the department door, holding a medical record book. Behind him was a solemn, cold background. He looked down at her.
Yun Li stood still, unsure how to react.
Fu Shize walked down, gradually approaching her until he stopped in front of her. He asked, “Are you feeling unwell?”
“I came to have lunch with Yun Ye and needed to use the restroom,” Yun Li quickly fabricated an excuse. Remembering she was on the stairs to the fourth floor, she added, “The lower floors were crowded.”
After a moment’s hesitation, Yun Li’s lips remained tightly closed, not asking why he was there.
Fu Shize glanced at her awkward expression. “I’ll accompany you upstairs.”
He walked straight up, stopping in front of the restroom opposite the staircase landing.
Yun Li followed behind him, entering the restroom. It was empty, and she had no intention of using it.
Not wanting Fu Shize to realize she was lying, Yun Li entered a stall, waited half a minute, and then flushed the toilet.
When she came out, Fu Shize was standing by a nearby window. He handed her a tissue: “Wipe your hands.”