Through all those years of turmoil, Yunguo Duke’s residence had endured.

With its tall walls and thick gates, its storerooms stocked with grain, and the family guards and private soldiers within its walls, it had weathered the initial chaos following Huang Yungong’s entry into the capital.

Xie Yuzhang’s female cousins — all but one who had died at the hands of unruly soldiers while visiting her own maternal family — had survived.

Her uncle, when Li Gu attacked Yunjing, had joined Chancellor Zhang’s faction. They had secretly made contact with Li Gu, served as an inside ally, and turned against Huang Yungong. Though her uncle had come over rather late and could not be counted among Li Gu’s inner circle, he had nonetheless secured a footing in the new dynasty. Later, he had looked after Xie Yuzhang considerably.

Entrusting Lin Fei to Yang Huaishen would be safer than entrusting her to anyone else.

It was also partly because Xie Yuzhang simply had no one else she could turn to.

Yang Huaishen and Lin Fei had known each other since childhood and were very familiar. She was the daughter of a criminal who had enraged the Emperor, but since the Emperor had already permitted her to accompany Xie Yuzhang, it meant he had no interest in troubling this small person’s existence.

Yang Huaishen agreed.

But this matter, Xie Yuzhang did not intend to tell Lin Fei yet.

When she returned to Zhaoxia Palace, Lin Fei was bent over a desk, writing rapidly.

“What are you writing?” Xie Yuzhang asked.

Lin Fei set down her brush, massaged her wrist, and said, “Thinking about what needs to be prepared.”

Xie Yuzhang sat down, and Lin Fei passed her the pages covered in writing.

Incense burners, incense and medicines, gauze curtains… it was a complete catalog of the necessities of Xie Yuzhang’s daily life. Xie Yuzhang understood at once — Lin Fei’s thinking was aimed at ensuring the quality of her life after the distant marriage would be no lower than it was in Yunjing.

Xie Yuzhang looked at Lin Fei, her heart full of a thousand complicated feelings she could not put into words.

Lin Fei at this moment was still so naive.

There was still a girl’s brightness in her brows and eyes. She did not yet know what kinds of people and what kinds of circumstances awaited in Mobei. She did not know, even more so, that the Da Zhao dynasty which upheld Xie Yuzhang’s honored status as a revered princess would one day collapse overnight.

This was the Lin Fei who had not yet endured those hardships.

Xie Yuzhang could not help reaching out to touch that young, beautiful face, as though touching a fragile and irreplaceable treasure.

Lin Fei froze.

What Xie Yuzhang was doing was strange, and so was the look in her eyes. That gaze held tenderness and… a kind of gentle love.

But she was still a spirited young girl who had not yet shed all her childish energy. In Lin Fei’s eyes, she was still the child who needed careful tending, the little princess she looked after with such care.

Xie Yuzhang withdrew her hand, smiling. “Go ahead and manage those things. Don’t tire yourself out. My trousseau will be handled jointly by the Court of the Imperial Clan and the Court of State Ceremonial — we just need to fill in the edges and the gaps. The major items are not our concern.”

Lin Fei had been throwing herself into it all afternoon with tremendous energy, when her mind suddenly cleared and she deflated, slumping back in her seat. “I’ve been an idiot.”

This was no ordinary marriage — this was a peace marriage. Even the Court of State Ceremonial had a hand in it. How could it possibly be her place to manage?

She really had been a fool.

Who could have imagined Lin Fei being like this.

That girl who was still sheltered in the depths of the palace under Zhaoxia Palace’s protection — how had she, step by step, grown into the person who always stood in front of Xie Yuzhang like a steadfast wall in the midst of fierce storms?

A deep, sorrowful ache welled up in Xie Yuzhang’s eyes and her vision blurred.

“Your Highness!” Lin Fei rose and wrapped her arms around her.

“It’s nothing.” Xie Yuzhang wiped her eyes, laughing. “I was moved to see you working so hard for me, that’s all.”

What was there to be moved about? She served at the Princess’s side — wasn’t it her duty to look after her? Lin Fei was puzzled.

“A’Fei.” Xie Yuzhang took her hand and looked into her eyes. “You have always taken such good care of me. Very, very good care. Thank you.”

“What is Your Highness saying.” Lin Fei sighed. “Were it not for Your Highness, I might have gone with my mother long ago. I would probably be a wandering spirit in the underworld by now.”

“No, A’Fei. Don’t think that way.” Xie Yuzhang gripped her hand tighter. “Life has so many choices — like a crossroads, different paths leading in different directions. I… have actually always regretted going after you that day.”

Lin Fei looked at her in shocked confusion.

Xie Yuzhang said, her voice rough with feeling, “I’ve thought about it so many times afterward. If I hadn’t — if I hadn’t gone after you, perhaps your uncle and older brothers would have found a way. The Lin family is a great clan from Jiangdong. Perhaps the clan members had already made plans, set up an ambush on the road to rescue you. I’ve thought about it again and again — if I hadn’t meddled, if I’d let you and Lady Lin stay together, perhaps Lady Lin would not have taken her own life. Perhaps…”

“Your Highness!” Lin Fei cut her off, both agitated and distressed. “Your Highness is talking nonsense!”

“Life doesn’t have that many ‘perhaps’!” Her eyes were red. “By the time the cart procession had passed out through the city gates, Mother and I had already made up our minds to die. You don’t know — the way those officers looked at us… revolting and frightening. We planned to hang ourselves when we stopped to rest that evening.”

“And then you came! You rode that black horse with four white hooves, wearing a flame-red skirt, cracking your whip and calling out loud: Where is the young lady of the Lin family? Hand over the young lady of the Lin family to me!”

Lin Fei was lost in the memory of that day, tears streaming down her face.

“I — I was struck dumb. It was Mother who shoved me hard from behind, pushing me off the cart, shouting: Here! Your Highness, A’Fei is here!”

“She entrusted me to you, and you don’t know how happy she was. The way she smiled with tears running down her face — I will never forget it for the rest of my life.”

“Those officers tried to block your way, and your whip cracked again and again — but even then you didn’t strike them across the face. At most you snapped it across their shoulders. I thought, even at a moment like this, Princess Baohua won’t bring herself to hurt anyone. You galloped your horse up to me, held out your hand, and said: A’Fei! Get on!”

“I climbed onto your horse. That horse flew like the wind, like drifting through clouds, and carried me back to Yunjing, back into the palace. From that moment, Your Highness — from that very moment, I swore I would never leave your side. I would take care of you no matter what.”

“So, Your Highness, you must not say ‘perhaps’ ever again. Even if life offers crossroads, I have already taken this path. Those ‘perhaps’ simply do not exist! Your Highness, there is no ‘perhaps’ — I have only you. My loyalty is to you alone!”

Tears traced a path down Xie Yuzhang’s jade-pale face. She looked at Lin Fei and smiled. “Very well. In this lifetime, I will protect you.”

Lin Fei broke through her tears into laughter. “Good!”

Language truly is vast and deep in its meaning. What Lin Fei heard was “a lifetime” — she understood it as never being separated from Xie Yuzhang in this life.

What Xie Yuzhang had weighted, though, was the word “this” — this lifetime.

This lifetime, things could not be like the last.

This lifetime, it was her turn to protect.

A palace maid came to report: “Fuchun from Hanliang Hall is here. Left Eunuch Fang has also arrived.”

Lin Fei wiped her eyes and looked toward Xie Yuzhang.

“Have Left Eunuch Fang wait a moment,” Xie Yuzhang said. “Let Fuchun come see me first.”

Lin Fei muttered something and quickly went into the inner chamber, returning with face powder to pat gently over Xie Yuzhang’s face, covering the tear stains and the redness around her eyes.

In a little while Fuchun entered, bent at the waist, and presented a rolled document. “The list Your Highness requested.”

Xie Yuzhang had only wanted to know whether Li Gu would be coming. Yet Fuchun had copied out the entire list — his ability to get things done was considerable.

Lin Fei took it and presented it to Xie Yuzhang. Xie Yuzhang unrolled it and, without looking at the others, went straight to search for Military Governor of Hexi Li Ming.

For a palace banquet of this kind, the attendees had to be submitted in advance. For a high official like Li Ming, he was permitted to bring one personal attendant to serve at his side.

This personal attendant was not merely a servant — it was in practice an allocation given to each household, allowing their younger generation to make an appearance before the Emperor.

Li Ming had brought two adopted sons to the capital on this trip. Which one would he bring to the palace banquet?

When Xie Yuzhang found the name “Li Gu” written in small characters below Li Ming’s name, her gaze stopped.

So in her past life, she and the man who would become the future Emperor had truly already met at this very time?

She had never once noticed him back then. But… had he noticed her?

Xie Yuzhang’s gaze passed through the thin page and came to rest nowhere in particular — until Lin Fei’s voice saying “Your Highness” pulled her back. She raised her eyes to find the future Head Eunuch, that face stacked high with a flattering smile, gazing at her expectantly.

Xie Yuzhang smiled faintly. “Well done.”

Lin Fei, reading the room, produced a gratuity envelope for Fuchun.

Fuchun gave repeated thanks in a rapid string of words and headed back happily.

Only then did Xie Yuzhang summon Left Eunuch Fang to appear before her.

Da Zhao had established the Imperial Music Bureau within the palace — it oversaw performers and acrobatics, trained musicians in popular music, and was headed by two eunuchs as directors. Ceremonial and sacrificial occasions used the formal ritual music of the Grand Music Office, while seasonal banquets used the popular music of the Imperial Music Bureau.

Xie Yuzhang was refined in musical arts and excelled at dance, and she often rehearsed together with the Bureau’s musicians and dancers. Left Eunuch Fang was the senior director of the Bureau and was on very familiar terms with Xie Yuzhang. He came in and said at once: “Paying respects to Your Highness — has Your Highness fully recovered?”

“It has been some time since I’ve seen you,” Xie Yuzhang said.

“With Your Highness’s health being delicate, this servant dared not intrude, though I thought of you every day,” Left Eunuch Fang said.

Xie Yuzhang smiled. “Let’s speak of business.”

Though they were close, Xie Yuzhang was not the only noble in the palace. Left Eunuch Fang was a busy man; an unexpected visit must mean there was real business.

Left Eunuch Fang said, “Today Hanliang Hall conveyed His Majesty’s oral decree, instructing this servant to assist Your Highness in preparing a new dance for the banquet three days hence. This servant came specially to ask for instructions — Your Highness has not stretched her limbs in ten-odd days. When would Your Highness like to run through the dance together?”

Lin Fei clearly saw the expression fade from Xie Yuzhang’s face, emptied of the eagerness and delight she had once shown whenever she was to perform before the Emperor.

Lin Fei’s chest tightened.

“I’m tired today. I’ll go there tomorrow morning,” Xie Yuzhang said.

“This servant will be waiting to receive Your Highness tomorrow.” Left Eunuch Fang smiled warmly.

“Your Highness.” The moment Left Eunuch Fang departed, Lin Fei seized Xie Yuzhang’s arm. “Let us plead illness instead. We — let’s not dance!”

“No.” Xie Yuzhang patted her hand, speaking gently. “I am going to dance.”

She slowly unrolled the banquet guest list and fixed her gaze on the names within, speaking softly: “This dance — I am performing it for the Son of Heaven.”

But the Son of Heaven is so heartless, sending away his own legitimate daughter to a place so far away…

Lin Fei turned her face aside and covered her tears with her sleeve.

She did not know that this “Son of Heaven” was not that Son of Heaven. When Xie Yuzhang spoke those words “Son of Heaven,” her eyes were fixed on the name “Li Gu.”

Her father had wanted to offer her to the new Emperor like a performing girl, because someone had told him something.

Someone had presented a dancer of surpassing beauty to the new Emperor. The new Emperor had watched the dancer perform — yet had said:

She cannot compare to Princess Baohua in years past.

They had been kept under house arrest at Xiaoyao Marquis’s manor. How could they have known what was happening in the palace? How could they have known whether the new Emperor had truly said those words?

In truth, Xie Yuzhang had always felt her father had been deceived. Whoever had told him that had been toying with him, deliberately wanting to watch those fallen remnants of the former imperial family make fools of themselves.

How would the founding Emperor of the new dynasty know whether her dancing was good or not?

It was only now, as Xie Yuzhang held that list and saw Li Gu’s name inscribed upon it, that understanding dawned.

She cannot compare to Princess Baohua in years past.

Perhaps that Emperor had truly said those words?

He had also said the palace kept a portrait of her.

He had said: The historians will record it. People will know — Princess Baohua was… very beautiful.

He thought she was beautiful.

Lin Fei had said: he likes you.

Likes — that was useful.

A man’s affection, though revolting and frightening, had its uses in certain situations.

The affection of a future Emperor, a founding ruler of a dynasty — that was surely better than no affection at all.

She didn’t know yet whether it would be useful, or what use it might be. But she was standing at a crossroads in her life, and one more advantage, one more card to play, was always better than nothing.

Xie Yuzhang found that the more calculated her thoughts became, the more strength seemed to rise up within her from nothing.

The more strength she gained, the less fear she felt about what lay ahead.

This — was good.