Xie Yuzhang searched and sifted through the palace archives and turned up some court regulations from the Former Zhao period, which were, as she had expected, incomplete and full of gaps. The rest would have to be gathered gradually.

She went to the Lin household to find Lin Fei: “I’ve first drawn up a general framework, and we can fill in the content from there. Help me look over this outline and see if there’s anything I’ve overlooked.”

Lin Fei leafed through it while asking, “How did this task come to be assigned to you?”

Xie Yuzhang said, “It was originally to be given to Honored Consort Cui, but she’s with child now. Consort Shu has the Second Prince to attend to, so it was passed to me.”

Lin Fei asked, “And what made His Majesty think of restructuring the inner palace regulations?”

Xie Yuzhang paused.

Lin Fei looked up. “Zhuzhu?”

Xie Yuzhang, for reasons she couldn’t quite name, didn’t particularly want to tell Lin Fei about the spring banquet. She only said, “The inner palace has been muddling along for too long — it can’t go on like this. The rules had to be established sooner or later.”

But Lin Fei frowned and pressed: “Zhuzhu, what happened?”

The depth of understanding between the two of them was beyond what most people could imagine. Concealing things from Lin Fei was no easy matter. Xie Yuzhang had no choice but to tell her: “Li Zhenzhen was audaciously bold and schemed against His Majesty.” She gave a rough account of what had happened that day, omitting the details of what had occurred inside the chamber.

What Li Zhenzhen had done was primarily infuriating and hateful, but to two women who had together conspired to eliminate Ashina Wuwei, it was not especially frightening. Between the two of them, anything that did not threaten their lives was not truly frightening.

And so after Lin Fei sat in silence for some time, what she said was this: “He was under the influence of the drug, and he still let you leave?”

That was where her attention had landed.

Thinking back to Li Gu’s arm tightening around her and then releasing, Xie Yuzhang felt a strange sensation rise in both her body and her heart. She said, “His Majesty is a true gentleman.”

But Lin Fei gazed at her for a long moment, set down her brush, and said, “Zhuzhu, what will happen from here?”

Xie Yuzhang was startled.

“His Majesty is a true man and a true gentleman — you’ve known this for a long time. He gave you the title of princess, and gave you his promise of protection. With those, you have more than enough to ensure safety, security, and freedom from humiliation after your return to Yunjing.”

“So then why have you been keeping the Emperor at arm’s length all this time? The way you handle the Emperor is no different from the way you handled the old man back then. You clearly want something — yet you don’t want to enter the palace.”

“Zhuzhu, tell me. After returning to Yunjing, what is still going to happen? What compels you to act this way?”

Lin Fei was always this perceptive — she could be deceived by anyone except her.

Xie Yuzhang’s tears fell.

“Whatever happens,” she said, “A’Fei, it has nothing to do with you anymore.”

She said, “What comes next — it’s all my affair alone.”

Lin Fei said angrily, “After all these years between us, you say something like this to me?”

Xie Yuzhang wiped away her tears. “A very long time, yes. But if you were to ask me what my greatest accomplishment of all these years is? A’Fei, I’ll tell you: it’s that I brought you back from the grasslands untouched and unharmed, and returned you whole to the Lin family, leaving the reputation of a Lin family daughter standing tall and unblemished, unsullied by association with me.”

“So A’Fei, go and live your life well. Find a young man of matching status who is good to you, and be the mistress of your own household. With your talents, you could manage an entire clan’s affairs. Have children — at least two. I hope you’ll love them like your heart’s blood, like your most precious treasures. I hope you’ll enjoy the joys of marriage and family.”

“As for me, A’Fei — I have Li Gu’s love.”

“In his heart, I hold some place after all. In the very worst case, I’ll enter the palace as one of his consorts. He is truly a man of lasting devotion, who does his best by the women in his life — one can feel at ease. If I’m powerless to do anything else, I can at least preserve myself. It won’t come to a death’s end.”

They had already returned to Yunjing, and yet Xie Yuzhang was still weighing the question of survival!

Lin Fei was alarmed, and seized her by the arm. “Zhuzhu, tell me what’s actually happening. Two people thinking together will always be stronger than one. Haven’t we always figured things out together?”

She had already arrived at a suspicion: “Is it the Xiaoyao Marquisate?”

Xie Yuzhang clasped Lin Fei’s hands.

In this lifetime, they had clasped each other’s hands so many times — offering encouragement to each other.

“We can do it!”

“We’re not afraid!”

“We have each other!”

In their previous life, that hand had reached for her again and again, holding her up —

“Zhuzhu, keep living!”

Limitless courage surged up in Xie Yuzhang’s heart.

She smiled through her tears: “Don’t get involved. You bear the surname Lin — just live your life as a Lin family daughter. The Lin family has their own matters to attend to.”

“But I bear the surname Xie.”

“A’Fei, I am surnamed Xie. I am a daughter of the Xie clan.”

“This blood in my veins — unless it can be replaced entirely, it is a bond that can never be severed in one lifetime. Even if I can suppress what is about to happen, it will be useless. As long as the Xiaoyao Marquisate stands for a day, as long as Xie Family Village exists for a day, my entire life is destined to depend on imperial power, to rely on Li Shiyi Lang.”

“I have indeed been keeping him at arm’s length all along. I long ago prepared myself to give myself to him sooner or later.”

“Only it cannot be now. I have too few bargaining chips. I can only keep myself in reserve — waiting to be of the most use at the most critical moment.”

The phrase “keeping herself in reserve” pierced Lin Fei to the heart. She wept. “Zhuzhu, what do you take yourself for?!”

Xie Yuzhang instead laughed. “A useful person. A’Fei, I feel no shame in it. Because I am useful — perhaps I can keep some people from having to die, keep them alive. There is nothing more important than living.”

She wiped Lin Fei’s tears away. “Da Hu Jie told me: we Xie women, we stand tall for as long as we can. When we can no longer stand, whether to shatter like jade or to compromise and endure — that is my own choice. I’ve thought it over. Shattering like jade — what is there to shatter? Even an ant clings to life; how much more so a person. I still want to live. As for compromising — Li Shiyi Lang is a first-rate man. To call being with him a mere compromise would be far too dramatic. Things are not so bad. I simply want to do better. Like a merchant in trade: spend less, earn more.”

“Don’t cry. There’s no such thing as an honest merchant — I won’t come out on the losing end.” Xie Yuzhang laughed. “If not for all these tangled affairs of family and state, do you think I wouldn’t want to spend a night of bliss with Li Shiyi? You — you’ve never been with a man. You don’t understand.”

Lin Fei spat, “Shameless!”

Laughing through tears.

After Xie Yuzhang departed, Lin Fei sat quietly in her room for a long time, then summoned a maidservant. “See if Elder Brother has returned.”

The maidservant went to inquire and came back to report: “Third Young Master is back. He’s in the study reviewing the ninth and tenth young masters’ coursework.”

Lin Fei dusted some honey-powder over her face to conceal the traces of weeping, then went to the study.

Third Young Master Lin was in the middle of testing his younger cousins on their lessons. He glanced at her. Lin Fei made no sound, but went as she had done in childhood and sat quietly by the window, waiting.

In the study, the young gentlemen’s voices rang out clear and bright, answering their elder brother’s questions without hesitation, with confidence. It truly recalled the old days of the Prime Minister’s household — except that then, it was their father doing the testing, and Third Brother being tested.

The Third Brother of those days had been far more restless and lively than the ninth and tenth young masters today. He had a powerful memory and a wide range of knowledge — the typical cleverness of the Lin family. But his heart wasn’t in the classics; he only loved painting, sworn to become a master of the art. As he was not even the eldest son of his branch, the family indulged him.

But time grinds people down. The carefree young man of former years now had eyes and brows of calm resolve; seated before his younger brothers, he made them not dare to think of mischief.

Once the examination was complete, the atmosphere in the study lightened. The ninth and tenth young masters crowded around Lin Fei and asked, “Has Princess Yongning left already?”

Upon learning that Xie Yuzhang had already gone, the two of them were quite disappointed. Lin Zi went over and gave each of them a flick on the head. The two young men left, sulking and rubbing their heads.

The years of youth, when there were fathers and elder brothers standing at the front, were like this — full of grace and beauty.

But Lin Fei and Lin Zi had had none of that.

“What brought the Princess here today?” Lin Zi asked.

Lin Fei said, “His Majesty has tasked her with revising the inner palace regulations.”

Lin Zi paused, then said, “The Princess’s involvement in inner palace affairs is quite extensive.”

Lin Fei said, “Don’t worry — she knows where to draw the line.”

Lin Zi said no more.

Lin Fei said, “Brother, the reason I came was to tell you something that has been troubling me for some time.”

Lin Zi sat down. “What is it? Tell me.”

Lin Fei said, “Back when I was still in Mobei, I had a dream. Strange, isn’t it — I dreamed that Zhang the treacherous minister’s granddaughter, Zhang Shi, became Empress.”

Lin Fei had made up her mind to convey to Lin Zi the limited information she had about the Zhang family concerning what Xie Yuzhang had “dreamed,” only she could not say it was Xie Yuzhang’s dream, so she attributed it to herself.

She said, “But when I came back and looked, she had become the Marchioness of Beirong instead. Quite a difference.”

Lin Zi laughed. “What’s so strange about that — people dream all sorts of things.”

Lin Fei said, “If it were an ordinary dream, I wouldn’t give it a second thought. But I kept having this same dream, over and over — that’s what’s strange.”

Lin Zi said, “Oh?”

People of that era still held a certain mystical regard for dreams — otherwise how would expressions like “the dream of the bear” for an auspicious pregnancy or “dreaming of the sun entering one’s embrace” have come about? There were those who cited the words of ancestors appearing in dreams to justify their actions, and even disbelievers dared not openly dismiss such things.

This was precisely the path Lin Fei was walking. She said, “You know I’ve never been one to believe in strange and supernatural things. But how can a person have the exact same dream, repeated over and over, every time exactly the same? I find it truly unsettling. Could it be that Grandfather and Father and Mother somehow knew something, and were specifically revealing it to us?”

Lin Zi immediately grew solemn. “Tell me exactly what you dreamed.”

Lin Fei said, “It’s not complicated. Zhang Shi became Empress, and bore a legitimate heir. The First Prince was healthy; the Second Prince…”

Lin Zi asked, “What happened to the Second Prince?”

Lin Fei said, “In the dream — he died young.”

Lin Zi was struck with a cold dread. He suddenly thought to ask, “You were dreaming of Consorts Cui and Deng even while you were in Mobei?”

Lin Fei said, “Yes. At that time I had never heard of either of them — and yet I dreamed of them. Tell me — isn’t that remarkable?”

Lin Fei, though a woman, was steady and reliable — not the sort who would talk nonsense or spin fabrications.

Moreover, Lin Zi, stationed in the Secretariat, had his own connections and had long known that Zhang Fen had originally been designated as Empress. He simply didn’t know what had gone wrong that day to cause the Emperor to dismiss all the candidate women. Now, with Lin Fei speaking this way today, Lin Zi believed her, and pressed for more details.

Lin Fei revealed the most important part: “Zhang Empress died by hanging herself in the Central Palace, and the entire Zhang family was executed and their clan annihilated. Brother — if the ancestors truly intended to show us something, it must lie in this event.”

“By that time the Emperor would have been just over thirty, in his prime and at the height of his power. The succession dispute between princes would not yet have reached such an extreme. The Zhang family must have done something else entirely.”

“Brother, let us think carefully — what could the Zhang family possibly have done, to be sentenced to annihilation of the entire clan?”