“A’Shu, you are so beautiful. From the very first moment I saw you, I was taken with you…”
A blurred face drew closer and closer, eyes burning with eager desire and a twisted, savage satisfaction, pressing her down without mercy beneath him. “Now, at last, you are mine…”
No! Get away from me!
No matter how great your appetite for women — you had no right to take your own son’s wife by force. What you have done is no different from an animal. How will you face Lu Hong when he returns?
“You are still thinking of A’Hong? Give up those foolish hopes. He has moved into the Princess’s manor — living with her under the same roof. Once Prince Yan ascends the throne, he will be the Emperor’s own brother-in-law, riding the highest currents of fortune and honor. He forgot about you long ago…”
No. That cannot be. He swore an oath — to wed her and grow old together, never to forsake her for as long as they both lived. He must have had no choice. He would never abandon her and their son…
In the darkness, she struggled and wept without hope, without a soul to save her.
The man pinning her down did as he pleased, bringing her nothing but endless humiliation and pain.
Ling Jingshu snapped awake, bolting upright, her heart pounding like a war drum, her palms slick with cold sweat. She drew several sharp, unsteady breaths before the heaving in her chest finally began to calm.
Her face felt cold. At some point, tears had traced their way down her cheeks.
Since her rebirth, she had been telling herself over and over that everything from her past life was finished. She had forced herself to press down every shred of hatred, to face Ling Shi with her viper’s heart composedly, to face Lu Qian — whose obsession had ultimately destroyed her — and to face Lu Hong, who had abandoned his wife and child without a backward glance.
But then Lu An appeared, and the true nightmare of her past life came to stand before her in the flesh. Only then did she know — she could never truly forget the shame of what had been done to her.
“Miss, why did you wake so suddenly?” Bai Yu, who had been sleeping on the floor, was roused by the faint sound, rubbed her eyes, and pushed aside the gauze curtain to peer in. “Did you have a nightmare?”
Ling Jingshu steadied herself, wiped the beads of sweat from her brow with her sleeve, and kept her voice even. “Yes, a nightmare. I was startled awake. Don’t worry — I’ll be all right on my own in a moment.”
Bai Yu hesitated briefly, then said softly, “If Miss doesn’t mind, I’ll sleep beside you tonight.”
Having company might make it easier to sleep through the rest of the night.
Ling Jingshu made a sound of agreement.
Bai Yu climbed quickly onto the bed and settled in beside Ling Jingshu.
With the warmth of Bai Yu’s body nearby, the chill that had settled into every corner of Ling Jingshu slowly lifted. She shifted closer to Bai Yu and closed her eyes.
Bai Yu lay still, feigning sleep, and only when she heard Ling Jingshu’s quiet, even breathing — certain she had fallen asleep — did she quietly let out a breath and open her eyes.
Ling Jingshu’s sleeping face was visible in the dimness.
Even in sleep, she was not at peace, her brow faintly creased.
Ever since Miss had recovered from that illness, she had been so different from before. Others might not see it, but nothing could escape her own maid’s eyes.
What was weighing on her? Why was she so restless, day and night?
Bai Yu furrowed her brow and thought hard for a long time, but could not arrive at any answer. She decided to let it go. She shifted her head gently close to Ling Jingshu’s and together they drifted into a deep sleep.
The following morning, when Bai Yu opened her eyes, Ling Jingshu was already up. She had washed and dressed and was sitting before the bronze mirror, arranging her own hair.
Bai Yu scrambled out of bed in a panic, reproaching herself as she moved. “This servant slept too heavily and didn’t even notice when Miss rose. It’s truly inexcusable. Please punish me, Miss.”
Ling Jingshu curved her lips in a small smile. “I could see you were sound asleep and didn’t have the heart to wake you. I let you rest a little longer. What is there to punish you for? Go and wash and change your clothes, then come back and help me with my hair.”
Her expression was natural, her voice easy and relaxed, just as usual. There was no trace left of last night’s nightmare.
Bai Yu studied her mistress for a moment before setting her worry aside, smiled, and went off to do as she was told.
Once everything was in order, Ling Jingshu ate breakfast as usual, then went to Yonghe Hall to pay her morning respects to Old Madam Ling. Having already met Lu An the day before, Ling Jingshu felt considerably more composed at seeing him again. She paid her respects and then moved to stand beside Ling Jingxian, taking the initiative to strike up a conversation.
“Jingxian jiejie, that jade hairpin you’re wearing is so exquisite. It must be the latest style from the capital — I have never seen anything like it here in Dingzhou.”
Two short sentences were enough to bring a smile to Ling Jingxian’s face. She replied with undisguised pride: “This piece is from Zhenjiao Fang in the capital. The design is the latest fashion. Even the imperial consorts in the palace have pieces made to order from Zhenjiao Fang. This hairpin alone cost eighty taels of silver.”
Buying a young maidservant of around ten years old cost only about forty taels. One hairpin priced at double that was an indulgence of the highest order.
Ling Jingshu let an expression of admiration show on her face at just the right moment. “I have always heard that the capital, Luoyang, is magnificent and beyond compare. What a pity that I have never had the chance to see it. Jingxian jiejie is truly fortunate, to have lived there alongside First Uncle.”
Ling Jingxian received these words with great pleasure, and replied with measured composure: “Jingshu meimei need not sell yourself short — perhaps one day you will have the chance to live in the capital for a time.”
She said it readily enough, but in her heart did not think it likely.
Ling Wuye had made no headway in the imperial examinations in all these years and had no choice but to remain in the old Ling family manor. How could Ling Jingshu possibly have any chance of going to the capital?
Ling Jingshu had caught every subtle shift in Ling Jingxian’s expression and continued to smile without any change in her manner. “What good fortune would I have for that. By the way — did Jingxian jiejie not say she would offer guidance on cultivating peonies? If you have nothing pressing today, shall we do it today?”
What had been framed as a competition the previous evening was now, from Ling Jingshu’s lips, cast as a request for guidance.
Ling Jingxian’s vanity was thoroughly gratified. She warmed toward Ling Jingshu quite noticeably and nodded her agreement with a smile.
The full measure of Ling Jingxian’s pride began to dissolve after a single circuit of the garden with Ling Jingshu.
The peony garden of the Ling household was planted with a remarkable array of celebrated varieties. It was now the early days of the fourth month, with the blooming season drawing near. Buds of every color nestled among the lush green foliage, waiting to open — a coy and graceful sight, full of restrained beauty.
Ling Jingxian had visited more than a few renowned peony gardens in the capital, and yet the Ling family’s garden held its own without any difficulty.
When she came upon a peony in full bloom, Ling Jingxian stopped in her tracks with undisguised astonishment.
Ling Jingshu did not seize the moment to mock or gloat. Instead she smiled with easy warmth. “Jingxian jiejie, this two-toned peony is called Erqiao in the common tongue — also known as the Luoyang brocade.”
“Jingshu meimei — how on earth did you manage to grow this?” Ling Jingxian had dropped her careful composure entirely. She asked with genuine curiosity. “Peonies bloom in the middle to late part of the fourth month, and it is only the very beginning of the fourth month now. This Luoyang brocade is already in full bloom — it must have flowered as early as the third month!”
Ling Jingshu smiled. “There is a certain method to it. Since Jingxian jiejie is interested, I will explain it in full. The first step is selecting the right varieties for grafting. Then, in the eighth month when temperatures are still warm, you make the grafts…”
She held nothing back whatsoever, sharing every insight she had gathered over years of cultivating peonies.
Ling Jingxian herself knew a great deal about growing them, and could tell at once from what she heard that Ling Jingshu was giving everything freely. She felt genuinely moved, and a little overwhelmed. “Jingshu meimei — this is a method you have spent years working out on your own. You are sharing it all with me just like that. I am hardly deserving of such generosity…”
Ling Jingshu smiled and took Ling Jingxian’s hand. “I would not tell this to just anyone who asked. But when you asked me, Jingxian jiejie, I had not the slightest reluctance — I only wanted to tell you everything. Perhaps that is simply the natural affinity between us sisters.”
A radiant, genuine smile — it dimmed everything around her to dullness. Her beauty was clear and translucent, exquisite and flawless, so complete that even envy struggled to take root.
Ling Jingxian was momentarily stunned, then returned her smile and squeezed Ling Jingshu’s hand in return. “Yes — I feel it too. There is something between us that simply fits.”
Ling Jingxian had a proud edge to her nature and liked to consider herself above others. Apart from that, she had no particular eccentricities. Once a person became acquainted with her, she was not difficult to get along with.
Ling Jingshu had set out with a deliberate intent to cultivate this friendship, and when she was with Ling Jingxian she consciously deferred to her, choosing words and manner that consistently placed Ling Jingxian in the more favorable light. Within only a few days, the two had become close confidantes, and their conversations grew easy and familiar.
“Tomorrow is Grandmother’s birthday. Second Uncle finally made it back in time,” Ling Jingxian said with a smile. “If he hadn’t, he would have had no face to show Grandmother ever again.”
Ling Erye held only a seventh-rank county magistrate position, and was kept busy with the endless particulars of local governance. He had managed to free himself with great difficulty, only to be delayed several days along the road by illness, arriving at the manor just the day before.
Ling Jingshu smiled and nodded, then sighed quietly: “Second Uncle also brought his Yiniang and concubine-born son back with him this time. Seeing Yue Shi keeping up a brave face — it was hard to watch.”
She had no great fondness for the sharp-tongued Yue Shi. Yet seeing Yue Shi struggling to hold her smile the day before, she could not help but feel a pang of sympathy.
A man could take a houseful of wives and concubines without reproach. A woman was expected to uphold virtue, accept her station, and confine herself to the inner household — that was her whole world. The moment her husband’s heart turned elsewhere, there was nothing to be done but swallow her bitterness.
In a drifting moment of inattention, the painful memories of her past life flashed through her mind.
Ling Jingshu pushed those unwelcome thoughts to the back of her mind and steered the conversation elsewhere with an easy smile. “Let us leave off speaking of that. Jingxian jiejie, I have never been to the capital — tell me more about it. Let me hear what I have been missing.”
This was exactly the sort of topic Ling Jingxian loved best — an opportunity to share and show off in equal measure. She immediately asked with enthusiasm, “I have already told you quite a bit about the fashions in clothing and jewelry in the capital. What else would you like to hear about?”
Ling Jingshu had long since prepared her answer and replied at once: “Tell me about the famous physicians of the capital, Jingxian jiejie.”