Every young woman has one or two people whose images have fallen into their eyes and become unforgettable. Thinking of him brings a bittersweet sweetness. Many years later, while resting under a flower trellis, she might still dream of him – his voice and appearance as vivid as yesterday, smiling in the now-blurred background, just like the day they first met.

I too have dreamed of that person. On particularly dark and cold nights, I dream of that young man who smiled at me in the autumn wind of Jiangnan.

Then I open my eyes to see the eternally towering and empty backdrop of Chuxiu Palace’s rear hall, sunken in darkness, appearing especially grotesque.

At these times, I wrap my quilts tighter, guessing who will be serving in Yangxin Hall tonight, then slowly drift back to sleep amid chaotic speculation.

This feeling is not pleasant.

Of course, lying in bed waiting for a man to favor you isn’t pleasant either.

Right now, I’m wearing my middle garments, lying on the bed in the eastern chamber of Yangxin Hall’s rear hall.

This bed is truly luxurious, entirely inlaid with crystal and silvered glass. The window curtains are embroidered with scenes of the hundred immortals, adorned with various sachets and bright pearls, surrounded by brocade – lying here feels like floating on clouds.

This is the exclusive honor of the Great Wu Empress. Yangxin Hall’s sleeping chambers have two dragon beds. By tradition, concubines can only use the bed in the western chamber when serving, while only the Empress may use this bed in the eastern chamber.

Perhaps the Empress Dowager’s words had some effect. The day after our conversation, the oral decree finally arrived at Chuxiu Palace, summoning me to serve in Yangxin Hall.

After bathing and making myself presentable, I took a cushioned sedan chair to Yangxin Hall. Now I lie on this ostentatiously decorated bed waiting for Xiao Huan.

Following protocol, I could only wear middle garments. The brocade blanket covering me is somewhat thin. I lay there until my freshly bathed body began to stiffen before Xiao Huan finally came.

The room’s attendants had already withdrawn. He came over and lifted the mist-like bed curtains hanging in the air, giving a faint smile. His eyes had double pupils, and in those ink-black irises, no emotion could be discerned. “How is the Empress?”

I smiled, sitting up while holding the brocade blanket, giving him a coy look: “Fine, just about to fall asleep from waiting.”

“Is the Empress complaining that I came too late?” He still smiled lightly, standing rather far from the bed, his face half-lit by the glass lamps, expression unreadable.

“I wouldn’t dare. Your Majesty handles countless affairs of state, working tirelessly day and night. What does it matter if I wait here a while?” I smiled softly, extending one hand toward him. “Your Majesty, shall I help you undress?”

He smiled but didn’t come closer, letting the bed curtains fall, cutting off our line of sight as he turned to leave: “It’s getting late. The Empress should retire early.”

“Your Majesty!” I panicked, hurriedly jumping out of bed with the brocade blanket, and pushing aside the curtains. “Don’t go!”

He didn’t even turn his head, continuing to walk.

“Your Majesty!” I was so flustered I could barely choose my words. “I’m no worse than other women. I can serve Your Majesty well.”

He finally stopped, but didn’t turn around: “Empress, when neither of us desires it, why force matters?”

“Does Your Majesty truly desire those other women? Why can you be with them but not with me?” My mind was in chaos – I didn’t even know what I was saying.

He paused, then suddenly gave a soft laugh: “I don’t wish to bed a woman who thinks of another man.”

I froze, my voice turning hoarse: “What do you mean?”

He laughed: “Has the Empress forgotten? Wasn’t it the Empress herself who told me? That your beloved is Luo Xianxue?”

He laughed coldly, his voice growing deeper: “Empress, I hope we can give each other some space… That way our relationship won’t be too difficult.”

“You don’t care about these things!” I had truly gone a bit mad, blurting out, “You don’t care if I like someone else! You don’t even like me!”

My head buzzed… What was I saying?

All around was silence. Xiao Huan’s back remained motionless.

I took a deep breath, calming my emotions: “Your Majesty should know best – I am Your Majesty’s Empress, and Your Majesty is my husband. This has nothing to do with whom Your Majesty loves or whom I love. We only need to be like an Emperor and Empress – isn’t that enough?”

He remained silent. The room was quiet enough to suffocate.

I clutched the corner of the blanket, hesitantly speaking again: “Your Majesty? Is that not possible?”

After a long while, his shoulders moved slightly, as if laughing quietly: “Take care, Empress.”

With that, he walked out, never once looking back.

I watched his silhouette, that can figure quickly fading, disappearing into the night beyond the door – in the end, he still left.

Standing on the floor, I lowered my head.

I had jumped down too hastily, without putting on shoes. My feet against the golden clay tiles were painfully cold. I suddenly wanted to curse whoever decorated this room, making it so luxurious yet too miserly to lay down even a single carpet.

How many times has this happened? Being summoned to this room in Yangxin Hall, only to be left alone?

Xiao Huan has never touched me, even on our wedding night. He would smile, faintly but coldly, turning to leave each time, showing me only his back.

Several months after the grand wedding, the Empress of Great Wu remains a virgin – if word got out, it would be an enormous joke.

Sometimes I think, my marriage to Xiao Huan itself is a joke… because I said my beloved was Luo Xianxue.

Xianxue was an assassin under my brother’s command. As a method of consolidating power, my master once kept many assassins, and Xianxue was the most capable among them. His swift sword never failed to kill, never missing a target. In the half-year before I entered the palace, Xianxue and I were very close.

That day, holding Xianxue’s arm, I stood before Xiao Huan and told him my beloved was Luo Xianxue. I said, each word crystal clear: “I will be your Empress, but the one I love has always been Luo Xianxue.”

At that moment, Xiao Huan quietly looked at me, the corners of his mouth still bearing that politely faint smile. Then he turned and left, just as he would on countless nights to come, turning from my bedside, his back rigid, never looking back.

He must have found it all laughable, like a poor joke not even worth examining closely.

Who started this joke? Was it the late Emperor who decreed before his death that I would be the future Empress? Or was it the deities sitting above the ninth cloud?

Returning to sit on the bed, curling my legs into a ball, crouching on this excessively wide dragon bed, I began counting on my fingers: as long as the other consorts haven’t given birth, I still have hope. My goal is to conceive Xiao Huan’s child, preferably a prince – then I could not only be Empress but possibly the future Emperor’s mother. That way, I could protect my family’s power and my father’s position. That would be perfect.

Isn’t it just a matter of coaxing a man to bed? I’m still young – there’s plenty of chance, plenty of time.

Thinking this way made me feel warmer.

The next day, I left the palace.

The forbidden palace had no shortage of my father’s confidants – arranging for me to secretly leave once wasn’t impossible. I rarely did this though, as the crime of a royal consort leaving the palace without permission was no small matter. If discovered, it would be very troublesome.

I left through the palace gates and went to the Chuige Pavilion in the South City. Fortunately, neither my brother nor Xianxue was there.

I had someone brew a pot of osmanthus tea and sat in the cool pavilion waiting for them.

The pavilion was built by my master and brother with their own hands several years ago. Master had also planted a large cluster of purple jasmine in the corner, which still grew thick with buds, lush and verdant.

As the slightly bitter fragrance of osmanthus spread on my tongue, I waited until the tea grew cold and several sunset clouds hung in the sky before Xianxue returned.

He seemed surprised to see me there, walking over with a slight smile: “Young Miss.”

Previously, Xianxue used to call me “Cangcang,” but at some point, for some unknown reason, he changed to calling me “Young Miss.”

I smiled at him, blinking: “How was it? The girls at Cuiwei Tower are beautiful, aren’t they?”

When I first arrived at the villa, I heard Xianxue had gone to Cuiwei Tower in the Eight Great Hutongs today. He seemed to have found a sweetheart there recently, often staying for long periods.

Xianxue seemed taken aback, his amber eyes flickering before he smiled: “They’re just… obedient.”

“Xianxue must be twenty this year?” I smiled. “If you truly fancy someone, you should treat her well. A true heart is hard to find.”

Xianxue smiled, his gaze somewhat evasive: “A wanderer like me daren’t ask for too much.”

“How can Xianxue say such things?” I teased him with a smile. “What wanderer? Don’t tell me you’ve suddenly started caring about status differences.”

Xianxue smiled again, his smile characteristically languid: “It’s nothing. Just feeling these hands have too much blood on them to ask for anything more.”

I was stunned – Xianxue had never spoken such despondent words before.

I smiled, slowly standing and moving closer to him. Without warning, I struck, my folding fan thrusting toward his throat. Xianxue froze for an instant before his right palm shot out, catching the fan’s head before it could reach his throat.

After catching my attacking fan, Xianxue didn’t move.

He raised those amber eyes, his pupils carrying a faint trace of amusement as he softly spoke the words I’d heard countless times: “If you want to ambush me, come back after another hundred years of practice.”

I burst out laughing, past happiness flooding back, my heart suddenly feeling much better.

For the remaining time, I sat with Xianxue in the pavilion, casually discussing things we used to talk about. Xianxue didn’t ask why I was there, and I didn’t mention it. We chatted happily and freely, just like before I entered the palace.

Finally, as dusk fell and staying longer might mean missing curfew, I rose to bid Xianxue farewell.

He stood up smiling: “Once you leave, who knows when I’ll see Young Miss again.”

I smiled, joking casually: “If you want to see me, I’ll risk beheading to come out every day. How’s that? Aren’t you afraid you won’t be able to repay such favor?”

Xianxue smiled, looking at me without speaking.

I hesitated, feeling my words had been too flippant, and quickly shifted my gaze outside the pavilion.

The purple jasmine below the steps had bloomed in the twilight without my noticing. The colorful flowers clustered tightly together, swaying gently in the wind.

“Xianxue,” after a moment of silence, I looked up at him with a smile, “I haven’t said one thing: I’ve missed you these many days.”

Xianxue smiled too, his lazy smile carrying a hint of warmth: “I’ve missed you too, Young Miss.”

I tilted my head with a smile, rose, and left, leaving Xianxue in the twilight-shrouded pavilion.

I enjoy being with Xianxue.

Every time I see him, I think of beautiful things – like lazy afternoon moments, like quiet and beautiful courtyards, like the plains under the setting sun. All my memories associated with Xianxue are of leisurely, peaceful times.

Even though he is an assassin, supposedly belonging to blood and death.

Rushing back just before curfew, I had barely stepped through Chuxiu Palace’s back door when Xiaoshan blocked my way, voice anxious: “Miss, you’re finally back!”

“Did something happen? Did our Emperor suddenly miss me madly and come looking?” I smiled carelessly while changing out of my disguise.

“What? No!” Xiaoshan stamped her foot in frustration. “It was that woman with the impossibly difficult name, Xing Yiyong, who came looking for you!” As soon as she finished speaking, she anxiously covered her mouth and kept stamping her feet. I had always privately called Noble Consort De Xing Yiyong “that woman with the impossibly difficult name,” and Xiaoshan, in her anxiety, had blurted it out.

I secretly smiled watching Xiaoshan’s reddened face as she rushed out the rest: “Noble Consort De came to thank you for the books you sent a few days ago! I told her you were taking an afternoon nap and barely managed to keep her outside. It’s almost the hour of you now! Even a pig would be awake by now! If you hadn’t come back, we couldn’t have maintained the lie!”

I burst out laughing, seeing her truly anxious with her red face and ears. Not daring to tease her further, I consoled her: “Alright, alright, isn’t your young miss back now? Go tell her I was tired from serving in Yangxin Hall last night, so I only just woke up. I’ll freshen up and see her shortly, asking for her understanding.”

Only then did Xiaoshan heave a great sigh of relief, glaring at me angrily before going to deliver the message.

I changed clothes, arranged my hair in a palace bun, steadied my still somewhat rapid breathing, and when I felt composed enough, slowly made my way to the front hall.

Xing Yiyong was dressed simply and solemnly, sitting on one side of the couch. I walked over and took her hand, smiling: “I told them that even if His Majesty came, they weren’t to disturb my sleep. I didn’t expect them to take it so literally, making Elder Sister De wait so long. I’m sorry.”

Xing Yiyong quickly lowered her head, her face respectful and peaceful, showing no trace of displeasure: “This consort was presumptuous to disturb the Empress’s sweet dreams.”

She certainly maintained her composure well. I kept mentioning last night’s service specifically to provoke her.

I smiled, holding Xing Yiyong’s hand: “How can Elder Sister say such things? I’ve always thought of you as my sister – how could it be presumptuous for a sister to visit? Rather, blame this thoughtless younger sister for sleeping so deeply and making Elder Sister wait.”

Xing Yiyong smiled slightly: “The books the Empress sent me a few days ago – I enjoyed them very much and have been wanting to come to thank the Empress.”

I smiled: “I know Elder Sister enjoys reading, so I specially selected some to send over. I’m glad you like them.”

Xing Yiyong gave a faint smile: “The Empress is too kind to trouble herself.”

I smiled: “Not at all, Elder Sister is too polite.”

Xing Yiyong lowered her head and smiled submissively. No matter where she was, she always appeared so gentle, cautious, and quiet.

But was that true? This woman – the only primary consort besides Du Tingxin to be officially titled, daughter of Xing Yu, the Minister of Personnel who was also appointed as Grand Tutor to the Crown Prince and Grand Secretary of the Wenhua Hall, the second most powerful minister in court – could she be such a simple character?

I had a long intimate chat with Xing Yiyong and kept her for dinner at Chuxiu Palace before seeing her off. I had Xiaoshan carry a lantern and escort her to the palace gates.

Not many days later, the palace welcomed the Empress Dowager’s birthday celebration.

Since the Empress Dowager’s birthday fell in summer, there were many celebratory activities in the palace every year – fireworks, grand operas, lantern riddles, poetry contests, duck racing, water games – such lively festivities would last three days.

Although I had only entered the palace this year, I was already very familiar with such festivals. As the future Empress, I had been commanded to attend the Empress Dowager’s and Emperor’s birthday celebrations every year. The only difference this year was that I was now the Empress.

Appearing hand in hand with Xiao Huan at the brightly lit banquet, my eyes were filled with festively dressed consorts and royal relatives. Beyond these people, across the lotus pond filled with thousand-petaled lanterns, sat many officials’ daughters, each dressed in their finest on the banquet mats.

Compared to previous dynasties, there were fewer consorts in the palace now. Traditionally, after the grand wedding, there should be a broad selection of court ladies to fill the imperial harem, but Xiao Huan seemed uninterested in such matters. Apart from Du Tingxin, Xing Yiyong, and the few current serving ladies were all selected by Empress Dowager.

The vacant positions in the imperial harem inevitably made those families eager to send daughters into the palace for power struggles envious, so among the young ladies present today, at least half were likely hoping to catch Xiao Huan’s attention.

Sure enough, not long after we were seated, many shy, coquettish glances were cast from across the lotus pond.

Somewhat amused, watching those affected young ladies, then glancing at Du Tingxin and Xing Yiyong seated below, I suddenly had a wicked thought.

Deliberately pressing closer to Xiao Huan in the high seat, I took his hand and intimately placed it on my knee, saying softly: “The night air is cool – is Your Majesty feeling alright? Why are your hands so cold?”

He turned to look at me, not withdrawing his hand and smiled: “Thank you for your concern, Empress. I’m fine.”

I laughed softly: “Your Majesty toils over state affairs yet doesn’t take care of your health. Seeing this pains my heart.”

After saying these words that even I found nauseating, I quickly took two deep breaths to steady myself.

Xiao Huan seemed somewhat surprised too, and though still smiling faintly, didn’t respond further.

But just these few seemingly intimate exchanges had successfully dimmed those predatory gazes from across the shore.

Feeling a little smug, I leaned even closer and gripped Xiao Huan’s hand tighter.

The hand in my grasp was indeed somewhat cold. When my hand touched his palm, unlike what many might imagine, this slender hand wasn’t what one would expect from someone living in luxury. This hand’s palm was covered in calluses – some from holding brushes, but more were formed from gripping sword hilts.

What many couldn’t imagine was that their supposedly sickly and frail Emperor, when his hand gripped that sword gleaming with cyan light, his movements held an unmatched radiance.

Lost in thought for a moment, when I came to my senses, I realized I was gripping Xiao Huan’s hand too tightly, my nails digging into his flesh.

I must have hurt him. Hurriedly releasing my grip and looking up, I saw no change in his expression as he quietly withdrew his hand.

Helplessly, I gave him a coy smile, but before it was fully formed, I suddenly noticed the Empress Dowager, who had been sitting at the head of the banquet receiving congratulations, had noticed something amiss and was looking this way.

I quickly collected myself and handled it with an artful smile.

After the birthday celebration, Noble Consort De Xing Yiyong stood out the most – she had arranged nine thousand tiny characters for “longevity” to form one large character for “Buddha,” presenting it to the devoutly Buddhist Empress Dowager. The Empress Dowager praised her endlessly and even gave her a string of sandalwood prayer beads she had worn for many years.

Because the Empress Dowager favored her particularly, she also gained much favor with Xiao Huan, being summoned to Yangxin Hall for company from time to time.

For me, nothing changed. The Empress Dowager still showed surface care while privately guarding against me, and Xiao Huan remained neither cold nor warm toward me. Occasionally he would summon me to serve, but still just look once and leave, abandoning me alone in bed.

I’ve always been oblivious to seasonal changes. Only when Xiaoshan put away the thicker clothes and I saw more and more consorts and palace maids swaying about in light gauze did I realize summer had arrived?

What should one do in summer?

I remembered before entering the palace, there were many things to do – like riding horses to Red Leaf Temple in the Western Hills to escape the heat, or boating on Mirror Lake beside the forbidden palace to pick lotus flowers. In the evening, one could eat a bowl of crystal bean jelly at the night market in the South City, or sit in the home garden, listening to Master tell rambling jianghu stories under the watery moonlight on the steps.

There were truly many things to do in summer… but now I could only follow behind Chief Eunuch Feng Wufu of the Imperial Household Department as he led me to Yangxin Hall.

I had just woken from an afternoon nap and was wondering how to while away the afternoon when Feng Wufu suddenly appeared at Chuxiu Palace’s gate.

Feng Wufu had been in the palace for over twenty years, serving two emperors. More than ten years ago, when the previous emperor still reigned, he was already Chief Eunuch of the Imperial Household Department. After the previous emperor passed away, he continued serving Xiao Huan, performing meritoriously without fault for eight years. Now Feng Wufu was the palace’s most formidable steward whom no one dared offend and one of Xiao Huan’s most capable assistants.

Today was truly strange – not only had Xiao Huan summoned me during the day, but he sent Feng Wufu personally to escort me. I was quite overwhelmed by such favor.

Leaving through the Great Accomplishment Right Gate, passing through the long corridor, and then through the Harmonious Right Gate’s winding gallery, we soon reached Yangxin Hall.

As soon as I entered the rear hall, I saw Xiao Huan and Du Tingxin standing shoulder to shoulder before a couch, holding up a scroll painting to examine.

Seeing me enter, Xiao Huan looked up with a smile: “Has the Empress arrived? Come look at this original calligraphy piece ‘Shu Su Tie’ by Mi Fu. It was just presented by Lin Weimin, the Governor of the Two Rivers. Xin’er says it’s fake, but I say it’s genuine. Come take a look too.”

He specially summoned me just to look at calligraphy? I walked over with a bright smile: “This consort’s learning is shallow – how could I judge authenticity compared to Your Majesty and Sister Tingxin?”

Xiao Huan smiled: “Why is the Empress being so modest? Though the Empress may be unfamiliar with calligraphy and paintings, she has discerning eyes. I wanted to borrow the Empress’s perspective.”

“Then this consort thanks Your Majesty for the praise,” I answered with a smile.

“No need for formality,” Xiao Huan smiled while looking at the calligraphy. “Just now, Xin’er said the Shu silk used in this piece is too old while the ink seems too fresh, suggesting it might be a later forgery, but I believe it’s genuine.”

“Since Huan…” Du Tingxin, who had been silent until now, began to object with a light laugh. She was about to say “Brother Huan” but, seeing me beside them, changed her words, “Since Your Majesty says it’s genuine, you must provide some reasoning to convince me.”

Xiao Huan sighed softly, smiling: “Mi Fu’s brushwork was like a swift sword cutting through formations, like an arrow flying a thousand li. Though renowned for his ‘eight-directional sharp edges,’ his character structures are well-arranged, with balanced spacing between dense and sparse. The Shu silk’s rough texture makes writing difficult – that’s why when the Shao family had a piece of Shu silk, it was passed down three generations with no one daring to write on it, until Mi Fu saw it and confidently wrote upon it in one go…”

Du Tingxin cut him off with slight reproach: “Why is Your Majesty expounding on all this? Mi Fu’s calligraphic characteristics and the history of the ‘Shu Su Tie’ are common knowledge – what’s there to discuss?”

“Indeed, Mi Fu is already difficult to imitate, and writing on Shu silk is even harder. If I were forging, I’d rather forge anything else than attempt this incredibly difficult ‘Shu Su Tie,'” Xiao Huan replied calmly, without anger.

“Well…” Du Tingxin was momentarily speechless, then suddenly pulled at me, “Empress, tell us who’s right?”

I only had a basic understanding of calligraphy and couldn’t follow their discussion, so I smiled: “Both Your Majesty and Sister Tingxin make sense – I don’t know whose opinion to follow.”

“I know – the Empress surely thinks I’m right but doesn’t dare say so in front of Your Majesty,” Du Tingxin giggled while holding onto me. Her demeanor had always been as elegant as a secluded orchid. For a brief time, I had thought she was capable of no expression besides smiling, but unexpectedly, in private she displayed such charm – every gesture and smile worthy of painting. Such a beauty truly made one feel inadequate.

“If Sister Tingxin says so, I suppose I must say something,” I smiled, glancing at Xiao Huan. “In my opinion, this piece must be genuine.”

“Oh? How so?” Du Tingxin looked at me with interest.

“I suspect Your Majesty knew this was genuine even before opening the scroll,” I smiled. “I may not understand how to authenticate calligraphy, but I know that Lin Weimin, the Governor of Two Rivers, is cautious and doesn’t seek credit. If he hadn’t thoroughly verified this piece as genuine, how would he dare present it to the palace?” I smiled at Xiao Huan. “Isn’t this what Your Majesty thought? That’s why this consort dares say Your Majesty knew it was genuine before even seeing it.”

Xiao Huan nodded with a smile: “I said the Empress had discerning eyes, and indeed she does. Xin’er, are you convinced now?”

Du Tingxin gave a light snort: “Unlike Your Majesty and the Empress, I don’t know this Lin Weimin. I was just discussing the calligraphy itself.”

“Very well, let’s just discuss the calligraphy then.” Xiao Huan smiled indulgently as he put away the scroll and picked up another landscape painting from the small table beside the couch, continuing to appreciate it with Du Tingxin.

They spent the entire afternoon discussing various calligraphy pieces and paintings. I occasionally made agreeing sounds, dying of boredom but unable to say so – it was truly torturous.

Finally, when it was time for the evening meal, Xiao Huan put down the piece he was holding and stood up, saying: “Since the Empress will be coming to Yangxin Hall later anyway, just stay here for dinner.”

I was startled, finally understanding he meant to keep me for the night. Though I had somewhat expected this when coming, I was still surprised: “Your Majesty, what special occasion is today?”

Xiao Huan smiled: “Must it be a special occasion for me to keep the Empress?”

I hurriedly said: “This consort didn’t mean that.”

He smiled: “If keeping the Empress for one night causes such surprise, it seems I’ve truly been neglecting the Empress.”

Du Tingxin tactfully interjected, curtseying: “Your Majesty, Empress, Xin’er will take her leave.”

Xiao Huan quickly helped her up: “You’ve had a tiring afternoon as well.”

Du Tingxin looked up at him with a smile, then smiled at me before turning to leave.

Watching her silhouette disappear, Xiao Huan turned to me with a smile: “I wonder if tonight’s dishes will suit the Empress’s taste.”

Unable to gauge his meaning, I answered casually: “This consort is used to being adaptable – anything is fine.”

With a mind full of questions, I could hardly taste the evening meal.

After dinner, Xiao Huan still had many state affairs to handle, so I took my leave first to prepare in the rear hall.

Removing makeup, bathing, aromatherapy, massage – the whole routine took considerable time.

When everything was done and Xiao Huan still hadn’t returned from the front hall, I dismissed everyone and waited alone for him in the eastern chamber.

Waiting idly for so long became quite vexing. The small doubts in my heart gradually grew: Xiao Huan had never enjoyed having me serve him, and keeping me by his side all afternoon like today was unprecedented. I didn’t believe he had suddenly decided to favor me – what was he planning?

Just as these thoughts were making me restless, someone tapped very lightly twice on the window beside me.

Is someone trying to secretly pass me a message? I immediately bent down, and sure enough, after a moment, the window was tapped lightly twice again.

I went to the window and whispered: “Who’s there?”

“Empress?” The person quickly responded, clearly relieved. “This servant is Little Ma.”

“Little Ma from the Fuel Conservation Office?” I was surprised. This Little Ma was one of my father’s people planted in the palace. Being in the conveniently located Fuel Conservation Office, he often passed along outside news to me, but his rank was too low to move freely in the Six Eastern and Western Palaces. Why would he risk breaking palace rules to come to Yangxin Hall tonight?

“Empress, something’s happened,” Little Ma said urgently. “This servant has been trying to find you all afternoon. The young master wanted me to find a way to inform you…” He suddenly stopped speaking.

Approaching footsteps sounded outside, followed by a thud as Little Ma’s voice trembled: “Gree… greetings to Your Majesty!”

I hurriedly went around and opened the door, seeing Xiao Huan standing on the steps with Shi Yan, the Commander of the Imperial Guard’s Forward Camp, behind him. Shi Yan’s hand rested on his sword hilt, and seeing me emerge, he stepped back.

I bowed: “This consort greets Your Majesty.” Then I turned my gaze to Little Ma trembling prostrate on the ground. “Your Majesty, I summoned this person here.”

Xiao Huan remained silent for a moment before finally speaking to Little Ma: “You may withdraw.”

Not only did the kneeling Little Ma freeze in surprise but I was also taken aback. While I was still desperately thinking of how to explain away Little Ma’s presence, Xiao Huan dismissed him without even questioning.

Little Ma came to his senses, quickly glancing up at me before hastily kowtowing and withdrawing.

Xiao Huan remained silent, half his face buried in shadow. The half visible in the lamplight appeared somewhat pale. I couldn’t see his eyes, only hearing him say: “Empress, this afternoon an assassin infiltrated the palace.”

“An assassin?” I was startled, then remembered I should show concern. “Your Majesty’s person is worth ten thousand in gold – were you frightened?”

He still didn’t answer, turning to say: “Come with me.” Then he stood waiting for me.

Though somewhat confused, I stepped forward to follow behind him.

He led me from the rear hall through to the front hall without speaking. Only when we reached the white jade steps of the front hall did he stop.

My steps faltered, and then suddenly I rushed to the bottom of the steps.

I had already seen it – at the foot of the brightly lit jade steps, scattered traces of blood from combat, and where the blood pooled thickest lay a person in black night-walking clothes, beneath them a shocking spread of blood.

His hands were brutally pinned down, surrounded by imperial guards in dark robes, their snow-white swords pointed at his chest. My breathing seemed to stop as I took another step forward.

As if sensing something, he painfully turned his head, his amber eyes meeting mine as he lifted the corners of his mouth in a slight smile.

It was Xianxue.

Xianxue had infiltrated the palace to assassinate… and was caught, lying before me covered in blood.

My mind went blank.

Xianxue looked at me, his gaze still like before, carrying that faint warmth and hint of a smile.

“Luo Xianxue.” A calm voice sounded from behind as Xiao Huan descended the steps, passing me to stand before Xianxue. “The person you wanted to see has been brought.”

Xianxue laughed softly, struggling to raise his head, corners of his mouth lifted high: “Thank you.”

Before the last word had faded in the air, a sharp light like a sword suddenly flashed through those amber eyes, cold enough to cut through the heavy night.

At the same moment, his hands moved. Those hands firmly pinned to the ground suddenly sprang into action, sweeping aside the swords at his chest and grasping a fallen sword from a guard. That black figure leaped nimbly into the air, the bloodied sword tracing an incredibly fast semicircle. Xianxue’s plain sword moved like lightning, resolute and cold, thrusting directly at Xiao Huan.

All the movements seemed to happen simultaneously. I only saw a flash of snow-white sword light as that black shadow, like an eagle spreading its wings, dove down.

The sword carried an air of finality as it struck. They were too close – no one could save him in time.

Cold light split silk as the sword reached Xiao Huan’s chest.

The wind passed, fingers extended, and the sword stopped.

The bright sword reflected those unfathomably deep eyes as Xianxue’s blade, in that instant before anyone could react, was firmly caught between Xiao Huan’s fingers.

In that brief pause, I remembered something and screamed hoarsely: “Don’t…”

As my words emerged, Xiao Huan’s palm struck Xianxue’s chest. With a heavy thud, that black shadow flew sideways, crashing heavily to the ground.

“Xianxue!” I finally cried out, my voice unrecognizably hoarse.

No one else moved. In the silence, the blood beneath Xianxue slowly spread again, staining the white jade floor red.

I rushed forward, madly pushing aside the guards in front of me, and knelt.

Not daring to move his body, I bent down, trembling as I brushed aside the messy hair covering Xianxue’s face.

His face was covered in blood, concealing his forehead and those eyebrows that always liked to lift slightly.

This was Xianxue – the Xianxue who loved to smile lazily, the Xianxue whose eyebrows held the pride of youth, the Xianxue who had conquered the jianghu with his plain sword, the Xianxue who would smile while holding an umbrella for me on snowy nights…

I lowered my head further as if that could stop the burning sensation rising from deep in my abdomen.

An arm wrapped around my waist. My body jerked violently as I turned, striking with my palm while my left hand’s fingers pressed together. My mind felt struck by a heavy hammer, clouded with just one thought: kill this person.

My palm struck his chest, but the force seemed to fall into a bottomless abyss. My wrist tightened as Xiao Huan caught my left hand.

His arm still encircled my waist, those bottomless eyes showing no emotion.

My free right hand struck out a second palm like one possessed, my eyes holding nothing but killing intent.

“He’s not dead,” Xiao Huan’s voice remained calm.

My hand froze in mid-air, gradually stiffening.

He stopped looking at me, turning to the guards: “Take him away.”

Several guards quickly came forward, carefully lifting Xianxue and carrying him away.

Xiao Huan released my waist, stood up, and commanded again: “Escort the Empress back.”

With those words, he left without looking down again.

My legs had no strength. Sitting on the ground, it was a long while before I slowly raised my hand. Crimson blood still stained my fingers, and the cold touch of Xianxue’s skin gradually became clear in my mind. His face had been so cold – so cold I instinctively believed he was dead. That’s why my mind had been clouded with rage, not thinking to check, focused only on killing the one responsible to avenge him.

The night wind blew in waves, making me shiver: What had I just done? I had attempted to kill the Emperor? Without even a moment’s hesitation, I had struck at the most noble man in Great Wu.

“Empress, please return to the palace,” a deep voice came from beside me. I looked up to see Shi Yan standing there, hand on his sword hilt, coldly reminding me.

Biting my still trembling lips, I pressed against the floor to stand, smiling at him: “Thank you, Commander Shi.”

Shi Yan said nothing, lowering his head and stepping aside, but his left hand remained tightly gripped on his sword hilt.

Perhaps it was my imagination, but I felt he feared that if he loosened his grip, he wouldn’t be able to stop himself from drawing his sword to strike me down.

No one in all of Great Wu could question this man’s loyalty to Xiao Huan.

Taking a deep breath, forcing myself to be more clear-headed, I walked past him back to the rear hall.

This wasn’t the first time I’d dreamed of lying on that excessively wide dragon bed in Yangxin Hall’s rear hall. The dreams were always similar, but tonight’s was particularly clear.

The dream held the sweet scent of osmanthus, laughter mixed with the sound of oars and the humid, warm wind of Jiangnan.

In the dream, that girl chattered tirelessly, holding that perpetually cool large hand. His calloused palm tickled her skin as it rubbed against it, and she jumped up laughing, calling him: “Brother Xiao, Brother Xiao.”

That young man smiled gently, his eyes black and bright, the corners curved with warmth, his voice as pure as a spring breeze in March: “Cangcang, don’t be naughty.”

I had never thought of him as the supreme emperor high above, never cared about our respective stations. The only thing I had been grateful for was that the person I was destined to marry was him.

For one of his smiles, I could be foolishly happy for half a day. Walking together, I would always hold his hand tightly, as if letting go meant he would silently disappear. Just catching sight of that cyan figure would make me smile endlessly while biting my chopsticks. Every morning, I would rush to his room with my hair still a mess, and only when he flicked my forehead and those thin lips spoke with an exasperated smile, “Go wash up quickly…” would my day truly begin.

It seemed I had invested everything in watching such a person, believing that this way we could be together forever regardless of consequences, believing that this was how life would continue.

I had never imagined there could be a different ending.

What exactly happened to bring us to this point today?

Without fail, at the end of the dream, all the bright fragments would shatter like torn brocade silk, with blood-red light bursting through the cracks. Burning fire would consume all the scenes until only fresh blood remained before my eyes.

It was in the auxiliary capital of Daiyu City, in that quiet, leisurely courtyard. I was carrying a pot of freshly brewed tea to the back garden when I saw Xiao Huan holding a short sword. Blood slid down his blade, dripping drop by drop, and at his feet lay my master’s headless corpse.

The fresh corpse seemed to still have a feeling, fingers half-buried in the soil twitching slightly.

An uncontrollable scream burst from my throat. The teapot had rolled away at some point, and a long sword appeared in my hand.

The sword blade, faintly gleaming with a light green radiance, pierced that cyan-robed body. Warm blood splashed on my face, and through my blood-blurred vision, he reached out as if to caress my cheek. His pale lips moved but said nothing in the end, his finger instead pressing my sleep acupoint.

When I next awoke, everything was different.

My master had incited jianghu outlaws to rebel and deserved his punishment. My father, though slightly involved, was spared investigation considering his ignorance and years of meritorious service in government.

As our wedding date approached, the reins of state power began shifting bit by bit toward the soon-to-be-ruling emperor.

Between preparing for the grand wedding ceremonies at home, I arranged to meet Xiao Huan outside the palace. Holding Xianxue’s hand, I told him word by word: I loved you once, I will marry you and be your empress, but now the one I love is Luo Xianxue.

Those words, childish yet cruel, were me forcing myself – forcing myself to forget those beautiful memories, so there would be a dignified and virtuous empress in the deep palace rather than a madwoman.

He didn’t need a girl foolishly in love with him, one he could use. So I would give him a capable empress instead.

On our wedding night, he lifted the pearl curtain before my face, and reflected in each other’s eyes was a pair of cold, distant emperors and empresses, even our undisturbed gazes seeming identical.

My dry eyes stared at the canopy of the magnificent bed, my confused mind no longer able to distinguish how much was a dream and how much was uncontrollable reminiscence after waking from nightmares.

On a clear morning in the summer of the eighth year of Deyou, this woman who had long since become empress woke from old dreams and began to sort through everything that had happened.