In the first month of summer, the weather was very nice that afternoon. The doctor told Feng Ning, “Your mother’s condition isn’t good. You should start preparing at home over the next couple of days.”

Feng Ning said nothing, standing frozen in place, unable to bear the weight of this news.

After the doctor left, tears fell in large drops without warning. After a long while, she leaned against the wall and slowly sank down. Not daring to cry out loud, she stifled every sob in her throat, biting down hard on the back of her hand.

Finally unable to catch her breath, Feng Ning opened her mouth, forcing herself to take big gulps of air.

In the busy hospital, a different tragedy unfolded every day; no one paused their steps for one crying girl. Not sure how much time had passed, Feng Ning wiped her tears away messily. Bracing against her knees, she stood up, went to the nearby restroom, turned on the tap, lowered her head, and let the running water wash away the traces of tears on her face.

At the ward, hand on the door handle, Feng Ning’s motion stopped. Taking a deep breath, then slowly letting it out, she pushed the ward door open as if nothing was wrong and went inside.

Qi Lan lay in the hospital bed, with little vitality left. She couldn’t say a word, only looking at Feng Ning, her eyes clouded, brimming with a lingering, wistful emotion.

“Mom, you can still hear me, right?” Feng Ning bent down, cupping Qi Lan’s hand and placing it over her own heart.

Qi Lan blinked at her, very gently.

“Mom, I’ll behave from now on, I promise. Don’t worry about me — you know your daughter’s the strongest, the bravest. I’ll be fine, I’ll be fine even on my own. Are you still in pain right now?”

Feng Ning wanted to smile, but her tears wouldn’t cooperate at all.

Qi Lan shook her head slightly, struggling to raise her hand to wipe the tears from her daughter’s eyes. “Good, no pain then.” Feng Ning sniffled, holding back a sob, and still managed to laugh. “I’m relieved you’re not in pain. No matter what happens, you’ll always stay by my side, right? If you’re tired, just get a good sleep — and when you wake up, you’ll make me my favorite dish again, okay?”

Listening to her murmuring on, Qi Lan reached out and stroked Feng Ning’s hair again.

She raised a faint smile, and a few seconds later, closed her eyes.

Qi Lan passed away in early summer.

After hiding away to cry it all out alone, by the time Feng Ning appeared before others again, she’d already regained her composure. She showed no great emotional turmoil, just spoke less than usual. The hospital issued the death certificate, and she called the funeral home.

Qi Lan and Feng Ning had relied on each other, with no other relatives. Very few people came to the funeral, only a handful of neighbors from Yujiang Alley. After keeping vigil for two days, following the cremation and burial, Feng Ning carried Qi Lan’s black-and-white photo back home.

Feng Ning cleaned the entire house from top to bottom, and once she had no strength left, went to shower. She pushed open the door to the room where Qi Lan used to sleep, and climbed onto the bed.

Just like when she was a child — when Qi Lan went out for a night shift, Feng Ning would drape her mother’s clothes over her pillow, breathing in the scent, hugging the pillow to fall asleep. As if her mother were still there beside her.

Let’s sleep, and when we wake up, we’ll find out it was all just a nightmare.

She’d run wild outside all day, and coming home, the courtyard would still be noisy and lively, filled everywhere with the clack of mahjong tiles, the big yellow dog darting around the tree. Qi Lan, playing mahjong, would call out impatiently for her to go help the cooking auntie in the kitchen.

Feng Ning closed her eyes, and these scenes became fragments of memory, flickering past in her mind like scenery from a passing train.

In her heart, she told herself over and over — Mom is gone, but it’s okay. She’d try harder, live her life well, it would be fine.

Feng Ning thought she’d accepted it, but waking up the next day, the space beside her was empty.

No matter how she called out for her mother, no one would answer.

Feng Ning finally realized that for this entire life, this long, long life, every minute, every second, she would never see her mother again.

Mom was gone.

Feng Ning began to fear being alone at home at night.

Night fell; she sat on the edge of an overpass, watching the traffic flow beneath. A few empty, tilted beer bottles sat beside her.

Her phone buzzed — it was Jiang Wen calling. She glanced at it and quickly picked up. “Hello? Jiang Wen.”

“Mm.”

“What’s up this late.”

“Why haven’t you answered my calls these past few days.”

Jiang Wen didn’t want to sound like a resentful housewife, but he couldn’t keep a hint of grievance out of his complaint. “I text you, and it takes forever for you to reply.”

“I’ve just been a bit busy.” Feng Ning looked up at the stars, comforting him. “You focus on studying at school, why do you keep thinking about me?”

Jiang Wen: “I’m coming to see you this Saturday.”

Feng Ning laughed cheerfully. “Forget it, don’t come.”

He was instantly unhappy: “Why not?”

She kept her tone light. “Young master, check the calendar — it’s already April. How many days left on the countdown? Two more months to the college entrance exam, so just focus on studying at school, don’t worry about me, or you’ll end up failing and blaming me for it.”

Jiang Wen seemed to laugh a little on the other end. “So what if I blame you.”

“If you blame me, I just won’t own up to it.” Feng Ning cut the conversation short. “Alright, that’s enough, go get some sleep.”

He finally noticed something off, and suddenly asked, “Why does your voice sound hoarse?”

Feng Ning tilted her head back and took another swig from the bottle. “It’s nothing, just choked on a drink earlier.”

“Are you outside?”

“I’m home.” Feng Ning cut him off, sounding impatient. “Jiang Wen, why are you being so naggy today? Stop lecturing me.”

Just then, a large truck passing beneath the overpass sounded a long honk. Jiang Wen fell quiet for a moment. “You’re lying to me.”

Her smile faded. “Yeah, I’m lying to you.”

“What happened?”

Feng Ning said nothing; there was silence on the other end too. After a moment, Jiang Wen spoke. “Where are you? I’m coming to find you now.”

From a distance, he saw the figure sitting on the stone bench, head hanging low, silhouette thin as a single stroke.

Jiang Wen walked over, grabbed Feng Ning’s arm, and snatched the beer can from her hand.

She turned, looking straight at him, smiling. “How’d you get out here, no curfew?”

“Climbed the wall.”

“Impressive, you actually know how to climb walls now.”

Jiang Wen pulled her up. “You taught me.”

Feng Ning’s steps were a little unsteady, swaying, barely managing to stand straight. “Tsk, guess I need to reflect on myself — why didn’t I teach you anything useful back then.”

Jiang Wen’s gaze was deep and heavy. “You… are you okay?”

She’d cried too much lately; her throat had gone completely hoarse, and speaking even a few words was difficult. “Sigh, I’m fine, just in a bit of a bad mood. Should be better tomorrow.”

She zoned out for a moment, then muttered to herself, clenching her fist and thumping her chest, as if puzzled. “Must’ve had too much to drink — why does it hurt so much here, in waves, it’s so uncomfortable.”

Tears fell without her realizing; once she noticed, Feng Ning immediately turned away, covering her eyes with the back of her hand.

Jiang Wen pressed his lips together slightly, pulled her into his arms, and held her tightly.

“My heart hurts so much.” Feng Ning pressed her forehead into the crook of Jiang Wen’s neck, gripping the fabric of his clothes at the waist.

A damp coolness spread across his shoulder.

Her tears soaked through his clothes.

Jiang Wen had never seen Feng Ning look this close to broken, this vulnerable. He felt at a loss, his chest aching as if something were blocking it, his arms tightening further around her. “What exactly happened? Is it…”

He couldn’t finish the question.

Feng Ning’s voice came low, with a slight tremble. “Jiang Wen, my mom’s gone.”

Jiang Wen’s breath caught; for a moment he didn’t know how to react at all.

As if some switch had been triggered, once she started crying she couldn’t stop at all.

Helpless loneliness enveloped her completely. She’d thought she was fully prepared, so why — why did it still hurt this much.

In the deserted dead of night, they stood face to face, embracing, and she cried her heart out silently in his arms.

Feng Ning said, “I’ll never see my mom again.”

“It’s okay, you have me, I’m here for you.” Jiang Wen’s nose inexplicably went sore too; he placed a hand on the back of her head, chin resting on her shoulder, tone comforting. “Wherever you go, I’ll be with you.”

He was still just a kid himself, not really knowing how to comfort someone, only clumsily touching her face, wiping away the tears that kept flowing.

Wiping them until his own hands were completely wet.

That night, Jiang Wen walked with Feng Ning through the streets of South City; when they got tired they’d sit down wherever they were, walking from midnight straight through until dawn.

She walked him back to the school gate.

“Should we grab breakfast?” Jiang Wen bent his head to ask her. “After eating, I’ll walk you home so you can get some sleep.”

“I’ve already walked you all the way here, why do you keep walking back and forth, isn’t this pointless?”

“Then let me ask the teacher for a couple days off to stay with you.”

“No need.” Feng Ning yawned, waving her hand. “Alright, enough, stop being such a nag, it’s annoying.”

Jiang Wen, suddenly finding himself disliked: “……”

There were many breakfast shops around here; before first period, a lot of Qide students would come here to eat. It was crowded around; they picked a shop at random.

The shop had quite a few customers; Jiang Wen held her hand, finding them a seat first.

A long line stretched at the window nearby, with students from both lower and upper grades, many of whom recognized Jiang Wen.

In the long queue, more than half the people kept sneaking glances their way, a few girls huddling together, whispering among themselves.

“Look over there, isn’t that Jiang Wen from senior year?”

“It’s him. Who’s that next to him? His girlfriend? They look so close, oh my god…”

“Jiang Wen?? The one who’s one of Qide’s three campus heartthrobs?! He has a girlfriend?”

“Could you not say it any louder, want the whole shop to hear?”

Feng Ning had no idea people were watching her. She hadn’t slept well in a very long time; her whole body felt hollowed out. The moment she let her guard down, exhaustion overwhelmed her.

Her hair was disheveled, covering most of her face. Drowsily, she propped her chin on the table, her eyes dry and sore, and simply closed them.

Feng Ning was still wearing Jiang Wen’s jacket; the sleeves were a bit too long, her hands tucked entirely inside.

Sitting beside her, Jiang Wen took one of her hands, carefully rolling up the sleeve. Once done, he moved to the other side.

Feng Ning let him fuss over her, mocking under her breath, “Gotta say, you’re quite the manny.”

Jiang Wen tugged on her ear.

Feng Ning couldn’t help a pained yelp, swatting his hand away.

Jiang Wen grabbed it again, refusing to let go.

“What do you want to eat?” “Whatever.”

“Then wait here a moment.”

Her head felt foggy; she slumped over the table, boneless. Her eyes stayed lazily closed, unwilling to open, and she just hummed twice in response.

Soon, a bowl of congee and a bowl of noodles arrived at the table.

Feng Ning’s lips suddenly felt warmth; something gently pressed against them, and he commanded, “Open up.”

Feng Ning lifted her eyelids, glancing sideways at Jiang Wen. She laughed inwardly at him — even feeding her while eating, treating her like a baby.

Still, she opened her mouth, letting him fuss over her as he pleased.

In full public view, Jiang Wen didn’t care at all about others’ stares. Holding her hand with one hand, he used the other, with great patience, to spoon-feed her the congee, one spoonful at a time.

“— Jiang Wen!”

A sudden shout rang out. Everyone’s gaze snapped toward Zhao Binlin at the door. Behind him were Xi Gaoyuan, Pei Shurou, and a whole group from the sports class.

“Holy shit, it really is you.” Zhao Binlin pointed at Jiang Wen in shock, then at Feng Ning, finally landing on their clasped hands.

A few seconds passed, and he charged forward in one bound, tripping over the small step, catching himself on the table, sputtering excitedly, “You didn’t come back to the dorm last night, you two, you two… what’s going on here!”

The shop grew noticeably quieter by another degree.

“You don’t have eyes? Can’t see for yourself?”

The people around quietly perked their ears up, waiting to hear the gossip.

Jiang Wen frowned slightly, impatient. “What else could it be besides boyfriend and girlfriend?”