No matter how weary they grew, they could only press forward — stumbling as they must. So it was for both Gu Yanxi and Hua Zhi.

As the year drew toward its close, Hua Zhi sent New Year gifts to the few families they maintained ties with, saving the Qin Family for last. The Qin Family had been closely watching her all along, and it was only upon receiving word of her visit that they finally let out a breath of relief. The sincerity of a relationship reveals itself most clearly at the year’s end.

The Qin Family’s First Madam had received her husband’s instructions well in advance and did not dare be negligent — she personally waited at the inner gate to welcome the guest. Her longtime nanny, who had served her for many years, gestured for the others to step back, then leaned in close and murmured, “This old servant has received word that the old matriarch intends to use her illness as a pretext to act — her meaning is that she wants the eldest young miss of the Hua Family to show deference and restore the family’s dignity in the old master’s eyes.”

The First Madam’s brow tightened. She had been kept under that woman’s thumb for years and knew better than anyone the nature of this propriety-obsessed mother-in-law of hers. Without a second thought she could deduce that the old matriarch could not swallow this grievance. Under ordinary circumstances she might have been only too pleased to watch her suffer another loss in front of her father-in-law — but not now. Her husband had made the stakes clear to her, and she also knew that the Qin Family had only recently received a tremendous advantage through the eldest young miss. That benefit had barely had time to be savoured, and now there was trouble brewing again. She felt there was simply no face left to show.

“Go and inform the chief steward of this situation.” The First Madam of the Qin Family dabbed lightly at the corner of her mouth. “How fortunate — the court went on its year-end writing suspension today.”

The nanny’s eyes brightened at once. Was that not so — the old master was at home today. Their Madam might not be able to keep the old matriarch in check, but there was certainly someone who could.

Hua Zhi, unaware that even before her arrival the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law had already exchanged an opening move on her behalf, handed the gift list to the steward and followed the chief steward’s nanny toward the inner gate.

She had expected to be led to pay her respects to the ailing old matriarch, and had already organized her words accordingly — only to find herself taken instead to her maternal cousin’s wife’s own courtyard. Her thoughts circled once more, and she let the matter pass. In the end, this was the Qin Family’s affair and had nothing to do with her.

“Though we rarely see each other, your cousin-in-law truly admires you greatly. To have accomplished what you have as a young woman — you must have endured a great deal.”

“It has remained within what I can manage.” Hua Zhi looked at the other woman’s expression — full of heartfelt concern — and returned a gentle, unreadable smile. “In truth, it is not as remarkable as it sounds. A person’s potential is boundless. Push hard enough, and while not everyone could do as I have, three or four out of ten certainly could.”

“Then I must surely be one of the three or four who could not.” The First Madam gave her a playful glance, then shifted topics with practiced ease. “How is your mother keeping? I hear Bailin has gone off travelling — will he not be back for the New Year?”

“Mother is well. Bailin has his own mind now, and I cannot always keep him tied close. A little time out in the world to wear away some of that young master’s temperament can only be a good thing.”

“Young master’s temperament? He was simply mischievous — I remember him quite vividly.” The Qin Madam covered her mouth with a soft laugh. “How could I forget what happened three years ago, when he joined forces with several of the Qin Family boys and very nearly burned down the Qin Family’s clan school.”

Hua Zhi remembered the incident as well. In those days the Hua and Qin families were truly close, and Grandmother had enjoyed bringing the younger generation back to her maiden family’s home. That time she had brought Bailin along — he was at exactly that age when even dogs find children tiresome, endlessly troublesome and exhausting. He had arrived and in less than half a day very nearly set the family clan school ablaze.

“When he got home, he was confined to his room for half a month. In the end it was you yourself, cousin’s wife, who went personally to the Hua household before he was let out.”

“He was only a child — a bit of mischief is a fine thing. It means he is a clever boy.” The First Madam saw her expression soften and seized the moment, taking her hand gently and saying in a low voice, “Your cousin’s wife knows there is a barrier in your heart, and she does not blame you. It is we elders who failed. But that does not mean one should let all those bonds of feeling be wiped away entirely — does it? Even if you cannot trust me, or the others, surely you can trust the years of feeling between our old master and your grandmother? In the end, after everything, the old master actually wanted to bring the young members of the Hua Family’s main branch here to be raised under his roof — he only relented when he saw you were doing so well on your own.”

Hua Zhi gave a warm smile. “All of that is past. Let us not speak of it again. Grandmother was a Qin by birth at heart — she would have wanted to see us in contact with one another.”

What the Qin Family sought was precisely this attitude. Having received these words, the First Madam’s smile deepened considerably. “Quite right — we are family, after all. We must visit more often.”

After a few more sips of tea, the First Madam glanced at Hua Zhi and ventured carefully, “Has Zhi’er given any thought to a new betrothal?”

Hua Zhi raised a brow. “Is cousin’s wife thinking of playing matchmaker for me?”

“Not only me — there are many who wish to play matchmaker for you.” Seeing her look of genuine surprise, the First Madam was even more astonished. “You did not know?”

“…What should I have known? If cousin’s wife had not brought it up, I would not have known there was still anyone willing to take me.”

The First Madam’s eyes went wide. “You cannot think everyone is blind and oblivious — you manage a household, you are skilled at earning money, you are far-sighted in your thinking, and you even understand the major affairs of the court. If you had not still been in mourning before, and if the mourning period had not just happened to end at the year’s close, the matchmakers would have been at the door long ago.”

Hua Zhi followed the logic of it and found it was indeed so. Whoever married her would be bringing a living deity of wealth through the door. The benefits flowing from the Seventh Division’s operations were already visible — once the transport network began to take shape, there would be even more people thinking along those lines.

A pity it was too late. She already had someone.

And that man had his eye not on the value she added, but on her — on Hua Zhi herself. All at once she felt a small longing for that perpetually warm embrace.

Seeing her say nothing, the Qin Madam probed once more. “Zhi’er — what are your thoughts?”

Hua Zhi shook her head with a smile. “The Hua Family bore me, raised me, gave me a life of privilege from the very moment I arrived in this world. I give myself to the Hua Family willingly and with no regrets. But on what grounds should I go and work like a beast of burden for anyone else? Knowing full well they only want what I can do — and yet still be foolish enough to leap into that burning pit? Not to mention that these men may wish to speak me into marriage with their sons and nephews, but those nephews and sons may not dare to actually marry me.”

Everyone understood the reasoning — yet a lifetime, when all was said and done, was neither so long nor so short. To spend it alone truly was a cold and desolate thing. But this was no longer something she could speak of. The First Madam patted her arm gently. “Do not speak so poorly of yourself. Do not let yourself suffer too much, either.”

“Yes. Thank you for your concern, cousin’s wife.” Sensing the genuine sincerity behind those words, Hua Zhi’s thanks were equally sincere. She had been ready — if the First Madam continued down this path, she would have come right out and said she already had a marriage agreement.

Hmm. That disposition of hers — having something to fall back on — felt a trifle audacious. Hua Zhi tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. Well, there was nothing to be done about it; in her own heart, the matter was genuinely no great thing.

She was now a little curious whether Yanxi already knew about all this.

After weaving through a few more turns of conversation with the First Madam, Hua Zhi began to take her leave. “I heard Grand-aunt-in-law has been ill — I must go and pay my respects.”

The First Madam was still thinking of how to respond when the nanny spoke. “The old matriarch’s spirits are not strong, and word was just sent that she has fallen asleep. The old master, hearing that you have come, invites you to join him in the reception hall over there.”

Hua Zhi gave the First Madam a small bow. “I must not keep Grand-uncle-in-law waiting. I have imposed upon you, cousin’s wife.”

“I would be delighted if you came to impose upon me more often.” The First Madam smiled. “Off you go — I will not keep you. Come visit your mother one of these days.”

“Of course. You are welcome anytime.”