Year 467 CE
Tuoba Hong looked down at the newborn baby in the swaddling clothes, feeling a sense of unreality. The weight in his arms was so light it could almost be ignored – this child was so fragile it seemed he could crush it if he used too much force.
He was only fourteen years old this year, yet he had a son.
Tuoba Hong knew that among the Xianbei people, having children at his age was very normal. His father had also had him at fourteen. Tuoba Hong looked at Noble Consort Liu on the bed – her features were beautiful but couldn’t hide her exhaustion, and he could see the complex emotions on her face. He knew that in the Great Wei dynasty, women in the imperial harem harbored extremely contradictory feelings. They both hoped to receive the emperor’s favor yet worried about becoming pregnant. If they bore daughters it was fine, but if they gave birth to a prince who caught the emperor’s eye, they would have to follow the Great Wei custom of “establishing the son and killing the mother.”
No one would willingly die, even for their own son. Tuoba Hong again remembered his birth mother’s indescribable gaze when he was made crown prince.
Looking at Noble Consort Liu, who bore some resemblance to a certain someone, Tuoba Hong silently apologized in his heart. If the child in his arms could safely live to age two, then he would be his crown prince. But before that, it was better not to let mother and son become too close. He didn’t want his son to have the same painful memories as him.
After instructing the palace maids to take good care of Noble Consort Liu, Tuoba Hong personally carried his son out of the inner chamber and saw Feng Qi, who had been sitting in the side hall.
His father had already passed away two years ago, and Feng Qi still observed mourning for him according to Han customs, dressed entirely in plain white. She wore a cross-collar straight-sleeved upper garment with silver embroidered collar, a wide silk sash at her waist that outlined her slender figure, and below a soft silk long skirt that trailed on the ground in layers. Her features were like a painting, her brow shrouded in faint melancholy. Without makeup, she remained stunningly beautiful.
Tuoba Hong’s steps halted for a moment. Because he was carrying the child, he didn’t bow as usual but merely nodded slightly: “Greetings to the empress dowager.”
Feng Qi gracefully set down the white-glazed blue lotus tea cup in her hands, her gaze immediately falling on the swaddling clothes in Tuoba Hong’s arms. She naturally extended her hands toward him, saying softly: “Come, let me see.”
Tuoba Hong stepped forward and caught the sandalwood fragrance emanating from her body, causing him to freeze slightly. He knew she had been fasting and chanting Buddha’s name for his father in that Buddhist hall, but hadn’t expected even her body to be permeated with such heavy sandalwood scent.
Feng Qi took the swaddling clothes without waiting. The little baby probably found the sandalwood smell somewhat pungent and waved his little arms restlessly, crying and fussing.
Tuoba Hong quickly took his son back and stepped back several paces. Indeed, the little baby seemed to sense familiar breath and immediately quieted down.
A trace of loneliness flashed through Feng Qi’s beautiful eyes, then she curved her lips in a light smile: “It seems this child has no affinity with me. So be it.” The Buddhist hall was lonely – the more she fasted and chanted, the clearer became memories of past harmonious times. Feng Qi had wanted to raise this child by her side, but given the current situation, this wish couldn’t be fulfilled.
Tuoba Hong frowned slightly and couldn’t help advising: “Empress dowager, you must also take care of your health.” He was only fourteen this year. Though naturally intelligent, controlling a nation’s authority was truly too demanding. When he first ascended the throne two years ago, state power was manipulated by General of Chariots and Cavalry Yi Hun. That Yi Hun harbored ulterior motives, often distorting his edicts to eliminate dissidents. In just over forty days, he rose from General of Chariots and Cavalry to Grand Commandant and Supervisor of the Imperial Secretariat, finally becoming Chancellor, ranking above the crown prince, covering the sky with one hand and completely disregarding him as the young emperor.
He was unwilling to be controlled by others but had to admit he couldn’t contend with Yi Hun. In the end, it was Feng Qi, who had been chanting sutras in the Buddhist hall, who personally acted. She quietly observed Yi Hun’s arrogance, unexpectedly formulated a grand plan, and with lightning speed executed Yi Hun on charges of treason, then announced she would hold court and administer government. Though she rested in that empty Buddhist hall after court, every policy decree of the Great Wei dynasty was issued by her.
Tuoba Hong smiled bitterly to himself. Though she had personally taught him, he could never match her in either scheming or magnanimity.
Feng Qi seemed to see through his thoughts. She turned the purple sandalwood prayer beads in her hands and said gently: “Hong’er, rest assured. As long as you have the ability, this Great Wei dynasty will still belong to you.” Feng Qi looked tenderly at Tuoba Hong, who had grown into a handsome youth. In a trance, she was slightly dazed – when she had met Tuoba Jun, he had been about the same age. Tuoba Hong greatly resembled his father, and the person she thought of day and night seemed to stand before her intact. For a moment, Feng Qi couldn’t help but become entranced.
Tuoba Hong met her gaze and his heart skipped, then he sighed with melancholy. He knew she was seeing his father through him. Just as he was about to say something, he saw her gaze clear and she looked away without a trace.
Every time it was like this – she was the one who approached first, and she was also the one who withdrew first.
Tuoba Hong’s arms involuntarily tightened slightly. The baby in the swaddling clothes seemed uncomfortable and twisted restlessly. Tuoba Hong was alarmed and immediately relaxed his grip.
“Hong’er, have you given this child a name?” Feng Qi casually picked up the slightly cool tea cup and took a sip of warm tea.
“‘Raising the great outline’ – let’s call him Tuoba Hong,” Tuoba Hong said lightly.
“Tuoba… Hong?” Feng Qi slightly furrowed her beautiful brows, feeling it somewhat improper for father and son to share the same syllable in their names. But since Tuoba Hong had said so, she couldn’t deny him even the freedom to name his son. She could only nod lightly: “A good name. If this child can live past two years, I’ll personally teach him.”
Tuoba Hong watched Feng Qi gracefully rise, knowing the meaning in her words – she would return governmental authority to him in two years.
For a moment, he didn’t know whether he felt more joy or disappointment.
“Wealth and beauty to people are things people cannot abandon. Like a blade with honey – insufficient for one meal’s sweetness, but if a child licks it, there’s the danger of cutting the tongue…” Feng Qi’s ethereal voice, accompanied by familiar sandalwood fragrance, passed by his ear until her graceful figure disappeared around the corridor corner.
Tuoba Hong held his son in the swaddling clothes, still lost in thought.
Year 470 CE
“The emperor has awakened! The emperor has awakened!”
Tuoba Hong struggled to consciousness from his coma, hearing consecutive exclamations from eunuchs beside the bed. Feeling his throat extremely dry, Tuoba Hong deduced he had been unconscious for some time due to infection from sores.
“Your Majesty, you’ve just awakened – don’t rush.” An aged voice came from beside the bed, helping Tuoba Hong sit up while skillfully placing cushions behind him.
Looking up, Tuoba Hong discovered it was Chief Eunuch Shang Xie and couldn’t help smiling: “Eunuch Shang, I’m fine. You should go rest too.” Shang Xie had served in the Great Wei palace since Emperor Taiwu’s generation. He had received much care from him since childhood and regarded him as an elder in his heart. Seeing him now haggard from keeping vigil, he was quite worried.
Shang Xie tucked Tuoba Hong’s quilt properly and pointed beside him: “This old servant isn’t tired, but the crown prince has been guarding Your Majesty and refusing to sleep. He just couldn’t endure any longer and rested beside you.”
Only then did Tuoba Hong see a small figure lying on his dragon bed. The tender little face was full of worry, and even in sleep he wasn’t peaceful, his small hands tightly clutching Tuoba Hong’s clothes. Tuoba Hong, fearing his own tragedy would repeat with his son, had taken Tuoba Hong away from Noble Consort Liu’s side right after birth. Moreover, young Tuoba Hong simply couldn’t tolerate the sandalwood scent on Feng Qi, so this child had been personally raised and taught by Tuoba Hong. Last year on Tuoba Hong’s second birthday, he was made crown prince, his birth mother Noble Consort Liu was granted death, and Feng Qi had honored her promise by taking over Tuoba Hong’s care while relinquishing governmental affairs.
“Your Majesty, the little crown prince has been personally caring for you. Even the pus from your sores was personally cleaned by His Highness.” Shang Xie handed over a bowl of freshly brewed medicinal soup, deliberately lowering his voice to avoid waking Tuoba Hong, who had finally fallen asleep.
Warmth filled Tuoba Hong’s heart. He took the medicine and drank it all, not even finding the bitter medicine unpalatable. Returning the empty bowl, he waved at Shang Xie: “Eunuch Shang, you may all withdraw. I need to rest a while more.” He knew if he didn’t sleep, Shang Xie would absolutely refuse to leave.
Tuoba Hong lay back down, seeing the small body lying wholeheartedly beside him, and couldn’t help embracing him in his arms.
When he awakened again, Tuoba Hong found his physical condition much improved. Opening his eyes, he saw a pair of clear black and white eyes staring straight at him. Upon discovering he was awake, those clear pupils clearly showed great joy.
“Father Emperor!” The corners of Tuoba Hong’s little mouth flew upward. Eunuch Shang really hadn’t lied to him – Father Emperor was indeed fine!
Tuoba Hong, in excellent spirits, ruffled Tuoba Hong’s disheveled hair – soft with an excellent feel. “Hong’er, you’ve been staying with Father Emperor these days. Did you properly ask leave from the empress dowager?”
Hearing Father Emperor mention Feng Qi, Tuoba Hong’s little face couldn’t help but turn cold. He snorted lightly through his little nose: “She doesn’t have time to bother with me now!”
The hand stroking Tuoba Hong’s head paused. Tuoba Hong rarely heard his son speak in such a tone and couldn’t help frowning: “How can you speak of the empress dowager this way? Do you understand propriety?”
Tuoba Hong seemed stimulated, his big eyes immediately widening like saucers as he angrily said in a crisp voice: “I don’t understand propriety? Does she understand propriety? Consorting with men in the harem – is that the propriety of a nation’s empress dowager?”
These words struck Tuoba Hong like lightning from clear skies. His mind went blank, only hearing himself ask in a daze: “Who taught you to say these words?” Yes, many people couldn’t bear seeing him and Feng Qi coexist peacefully, often gossiping in their ears hoping to gain some advantage from the conflict. Hong’er was so young – what could he understand?
“What do you mean who taught me? I saw it with my own eyes! That man is Li Yi, younger brother of Minister of Southern Affairs Li Fu. I’d seen him at palace night banquets before, but didn’t know he had such a relationship with the empress dowager!” Though only three years old, Tuoba Hong had grown up in the palace and understood what he should understand, and what he shouldn’t touch he also understood. Moreover, this wasn’t a secret in the empress dowager’s palace. Their Xianbei people didn’t take propriety and chastity too seriously. Even Feng Qi, who advocated Han Confucianism, only wore Han clothing and chanted Buddhist sutras. In her actions and behavior, she had none of the restraint of Han women. But for some reason, all the palace servants had tacitly kept this matter from Father Emperor.
After finishing his complaint, Tuoba Hong was raising his little face indignantly when he saw Father Emperor, who had just recovered from serious illness, silently rise and summon eunuchs to wash and dress. That handsome face showed no expression, his whole body emanating frightening murderous aura. Tuoba Hong vaguely understood why no one dared speak of Feng Qi’s secrets before Father Emperor – because no one dared bear the emperor’s wrath. But Tuoba Hong didn’t quite understand that Father Emperor’s current state wasn’t merely because of Feng Qi’s harem misconduct.
Watching Tuoba Hong stride away, Tuoba Hong sat dazedly on the bed for a while before startling awake, quickly summoning eunuchs to dress him rapidly, then clattered out in his shoes. But when he rushed into the empress dowager’s palace, he saw drops of fresh blood. His father stood there holding a sharp sword, blood still dripping from the sword tip. That Li Yi lay on the ground, a bloody hole in his chest, already lifeless.
Tuoba Hong’s little face went pale. Only now did he discover that Li Yi’s features actually bore some resemblance to his father – both equally young and handsome with deep-set features. Tuoba Hong shivered deeply, instinctively feeling he had discovered an extremely hidden secret, so he didn’t enter the hall but timidly stood by the window outside.
Feng Qi was currently chanting sutras in the Buddhist hall. Upon the eunuch’s report, she hurried over but paused when she saw the already dead Li Yi. She no longer wore the plain white mourning appearance of three years ago, but instead wore loose, flowing wine-red gold-embroidered dress and skirt, with a goose-yellow wide sash at her waist. The wide sleeves and hem fluttered rapidly with her movement, appearing magnificently regal and incomparably noble. Her face also bore a light layer of rouge – even Tuoba Hong had never seen such a beautiful Feng Qi. For a moment he couldn’t help but be stunned, then thinking of whom she had carefully adorned herself for, he became even more furious.
Feng Qi had now clearly seen the situation in the hall. A trace of resentment crossed her beautiful face before being perfectly concealed. She looked at the blood-dripping blade in Tuoba Hong’s hand and said lightly: “Your Majesty has just recovered from serious illness. Why not rest properly instead of coming to my place?”
Tuoba Hong gripped the blade tighter. Actually, he shouldn’t have been so impulsive. He could have found some fault and dealt with it gradually – he wasn’t afraid this Li Yi wouldn’t meet a bad end.
He had really just wanted to see what kind of person this Li Yi was, but upon seeing this young man who bore some resemblance to him, he couldn’t control the towering rage in his heart.
Clearly, the one who most resembled Father wasn’t he?
Clearly, in the hibiscus flowers, the first to find her weeping wasn’t he?
Clearly, the first one she had wanted to depend on wasn’t he?
Why couldn’t it be him?
Tuoba Hong heard his own voice saying coldly: “Minister of Southern Affairs Li Fu accepted bribes and was reported. Li Yi just refused to admit it and spoke disrespectfully to me. In my momentary rage, I acted carelessly.”
Feng Qi raised her willow eyebrows and snorted sarcastically: “Your Majesty truly acts according to whim. Do you take the Censorate as decoration? I really don’t feel comfortable entrusting this Great Wei dynasty to Your Majesty’s hands. It seems tomorrow I should still hold court and administer government.”
Tuoba Hong’s expression stiffened, knowing that today’s actions had indeed gone too far. In Feng Qi’s anger, she actually wanted to reclaim the governmental authority she had relinquished just one year ago.
Feng Qi gracefully crouched down, not caring that her magnificent dress was stained with filth in the pool of blood. She gently closed Li Yi’s eyes that wouldn’t close in death, then rose and left without any lingering attachment.
“Those who love and desire are like holding torches against the wind – they will surely suffer the calamity of burned hands…” Feng Qi’s blood-stained dress left mottled traces in the hall, which gradually dried in her soft chanting, becoming an ugly bloodstain.
Tuoba Hong staggered as if his hand had been burned. His body, just recovered from serious illness, could no longer hold the long sword, which clattered to the ground with endless echoes in the empty hall.