Branch Manager Fan’s official position was at the B City branch. His role as acting manager at the A City branch was only temporary. After half a month, Fan’s return to B City as he stepped down from his acting role was a normal reassignment. However, neither Tang Yang nor Jiang Shiyan had anticipated that a top-secret appointment would land directly in Tang Yang’s hands.
At less than thirty years old, she was to wield the scepter of power. Everything seemed incredibly surreal, yet somehow, it felt as if it had been arranged long ago in the grand scheme of things.
As Tang Yang submitted her political review materials to the head office, preparing to head to the top floor of Huishang Bank, Zhou Zisheng’s illness took a turn for the worse.
Tang Yang and Jiang Shiyan had visited him in the hospital several times.
Previously, Zhou Zisheng had been slightly chubby, then of normal build, but now he was so thin that he looked like skin stretched over bones.
The hospital equipment and medication were the best available, but the treatment speed ultimately couldn’t outpace the spread of cancer cells. In the later stages, he could barely eat anything, relying solely on protein infusions to maintain basic vital signs. He could no longer speak, only gazing at Tang Yang with eyes that remained clear, looking at her belly, at Tang Yang and Jiang Shiyan’s joined hands. From time to time, he would strain to turn his head, his peripheral vision searching the empty doorway of the hospital room.
The “Jiujiang Major Case” had entered its final stages. Zhou Mo, guilty but credited for meritorious service, was sentenced to five years.
When Tang Yang went to see Zhou Mo, she vaguely mentioned that Zhou Zisheng was bedridden with illness, seemingly still holding onto some hope.
Zhou Mo didn’t pretend to be confused.
“Some things really can’t be forgiven,” Zhou Mo said, shaking his head with a smile. “Even if he dies, even if he can’t rest in peace, I really can’t.”
Everyone has their difficulties, and Tang Yang didn’t try to persuade him further.
Xu Shanshan was like a sharp blade, viciously stabbing into Zhou Mo’s heart, instantly drawing blood. Then fate took that blood-stained blade and plunged it into Zhou Zisheng’s heart.
One couldn’t be mended, the other couldn’t heal.
Because, before becoming a blade, the name Xu Shanshan was beautiful. Like that afternoon when Zhou Mo first met her on the sports field. She had just finished running, sweat trickling down her temples and in front of her ears, gathering at the point of her chin. She raised her hand to wipe away the sweat, smiling at her companion, revealing two dimples, her skin glowing white.
A classmate nudged Zhou Mo, saying softly, “The one on the left is quite pretty.”
Zhou Mo looked over.
It didn’t seem particularly special; Tang Yang had dimples too. This junior wasn’t as beautiful as Tang Yang, Zhou Mo thought, taking another look.
At that time, Zhou Mo was in the last year of his doctoral studies. He was tall with a refined demeanor, had received a highly coveted return offer from Huishang Bank, and had already amassed millions through stocks and investments.
At that time, Xu Shanshan had just entered university as a freshman. Her appearance and clothes were ordinary, and she relied on student loans to pay her first installment of tuition fees.
Zhou Mo frequently upgraded his phone and computer, not because he was a tech enthusiast, but to pursue stable and fast performance. Xu Shanshan used a second-hand smartphone, and her relationship with her roommates was not harmonious. When she went to the print shop to write her midterm paper, she was cursed at by the owner, including vulgar insults.
Zhou Mo had a mild obsession with cleanliness. Whether it was a four-digit or five-digit priced clothing item, if it got stained with something that couldn’t be cleaned, he would discard it without hesitation. Xu Shanshan wore fake Converse sneakers with frayed laces that had been resewn, and the hems of her jeans were frayed into strips. She would haggle with small vendors over one or two yuan.
Zhou Mo usually went to the library or research institute. On weekends, he occasionally drove with friends for an outing or flew to nearby cities to attend concerts. Xu Shanshan’s usual haunts were the classroom and off-campus locations. In one month, she set a record of working fifteen part-time jobs.
Zhou Mo’s state at school was relaxed and self-assured. When walking on campus, girls would blush and steal glances at him, then point and whisper to their companions. Xu Shanshan rode a dilapidated bicycle at breakneck speed, sometimes with an unfinished steamed bun in her hand.
Separated by the greatest gaps in knowledge, wealth, and age in this century-old school, they ended up living in adjacent dormitory areas due to building renovations.
Their second encounter was at the bottom of Zhou Mo’s dormitory building, where various food delivery drivers were calling out to everyone who came, “Is 2873 yours?” “9223 Chongqing noodles?” Xu Shanshan was fiercely arguing with a male doctoral student.
Xu Shanshan: “The person on the phone for 8789 had a deep male voice, which you don’t have. You even got the phone number wrong. Why should I give you the food?”
Male doctoral student: “I’m helping my roommate get it.”
Xu Shanshan: “He said he’d be down soon.”
Male doctoral student: “I just said in the WeChat group that I happened to be downstairs, and he asked me to bring it up for him.”
Xu Shanshan: “Then show me the WeChat conversation, and prove that the WeChat account belongs to the person who placed this order.”
The male doctoral student, impatient: “Aren’t you being annoying? It’s just a twenty-something yuan meal. Who would pretend to pick it up? It’s so hot, and I’m in a hurry to get back to my room to write a report.”
Xu Shanshan sneered: “You got the number wrong, and I’m annoying for asking you to prove it? If it was your roommate’s, wouldn’t you take out your phone to check the number? Even if you read it out, I’d recognize—”
“8789.” Zhou Mo, who had been watching from the dormitory entrance for a minute, walked over and said in a low voice.
Xu Shanshan swiftly handed the food to Zhou Mo, then jerked her chin towards the side: “This guy said he was your roommate?”
Zhou Mo thanked Xu Shanshan, gave the male doctoral student a puzzled look, then walked past him.
There had been quite a few people around earlier. Now, the male doctoral student rubbed his nose awkwardly.
“Aren’t you going to apologize? You were verbally abusive just now,” Xu Shanshan said leisurely.
The male doctoral student turned and left.
Xu Shanshan didn’t pursue it further. She waited until the male doctoral student was almost at the dormitory entrance, then shouted, “Oh, by the way, roommate, that meal just now was 250 yuan!”
Some people around burst into laughter. Xu Shanshan snorted and cycled off to the next garden.
A string of jingling sounds followed. Zhou Mo stood at the corner of the stairs, lowering his head to glance at the 53-yuan takeout in his hand. The corner of his mouth curved into a slight smile.
Their third encounter was at the school gate. Zhou Mo’s flight had been delayed, and he returned late at night. At the barbecue stand near the school gate, some thugs were causing trouble. Xu Shanshan, fierce and spicy, was shielding a girl twice her size behind her.
Their fourth encounter was on the campus boulevard. Xu Shanshan was helping a classmate move out of the dormitory.
Their fifth encounter was at a recycling stand. Xu Shanshan was selling books, and a cafeteria aunty’s child was selling waste paper. When Xu Shanshan wasn’t paying attention, the child took two old books from her stack and put them in his woven bag. Sharp as she was, Xu Shanshan turned her head and saw it, then turned back, pretending not to have noticed.
Zhou Mo passed by.
Yes, he just passed by.
There were many people like Xu Shanshan in the school, struggling, living, and studying hard.
Like the male protagonists in novels, Zhou Mo might have thought this girl was different, but he wouldn’t have fallen for her. He was a person with high starting points and goals. He only liked girls as excellent, confident, and graceful as Tang Yang. They shared similar values, came from similar social strata, and wouldn’t feel a disparity if one gave a thousand-yuan gift while the other gave a fifty-yuan gift. They wouldn’t be unfamiliar with those everyday brands and restaurants, and wouldn’t worry about affairs or cheating. He was a rational economic man who had to calculate the cost of his still quite valuable time.
Until their sixth encounter, at the research institute. Xu Shanshan came to deliver undergraduate assignments, while Zhou Mo was discussing data with a professor.
Xu Shanshan greeted the professor and nodded at Zhou Mo, who nodded back. Xu Shanshan didn’t say much and left.
“Click,” the door locked.
The professor said softly, “This young girl has had a tough life. Orphaned from a young age, she’s been through welfare institutions and living under others’ roofs. Now in university, she’s bearing all the expenses herself, yet her grades are exceptionally good.”
Zhou Mo remained silent.
The professor continued, “I suggested to her that she could start working on projects with me from her sophomore year, and then directly pursue a PhD with me without needing to take the graduate entrance exam. She asked me how much the graduate tuition was. I said over ten thousand, but there are many scholarships, so she needn’t worry.”
Zhou Mo interjected, “She should be able to get the National Scholarship, right?” He had just seen the rankings; she was first in her major.
The professor said, “That’s what I told her at the time.”
At that time, Xu Shanshan had smiled bitterly: “Before the National Scholarship is confirmed, I don’t know if the country might change its mind. Before anything happens, you never know if there might be a change of heart,” Xu Shanshan said. “I might change my mind later, but right now I still want to find a job directly after graduation. I want money, lots and lots of money.”
She had no parents, and she didn’t know what love was. Money was her only sense of security, yet ironically, she had no money.
The professor had just mentioned it casually, and Zhou Mo had just listened casually.
Later, the teaching assistant for Xu Shanshan’s course took sick leave, and Zhou Mo substituted, returning the students’ assignments to Xu Shanshan.
Later, they added each other on WeChat. Xu Shanshan was very busy and never talked, but Zhou Mo seemed quite “free” and would occasionally chat with Xu Shanshan for a bit.
Even later, Zhou Mo came across Xu Shanshan wearing a food delivery uniform, handing out water to sweating delivery drivers. She unscrewed each bottle cap before handing them over, and the delivery drivers tilted their heads back to drink directly. He saw Xu Shanshan’s handwriting on assignments, delicate and slender. He heard Xu Shanshan being very serious in class, but full of jokes when chatting with the cleaning aunties, making them cover their mouths and laugh: “You should be a comedian.”
Even later still, he saw his roommates watching a video: “Labor dispute at the school gate, the leader seems to be a part-time student from our school. She was kicked and flew into a pile of glass, heard she was covered in blood and taken to the hospital by ambulance…”
Before Zhou Mo could finish speaking, he grabbed his car keys and rushed out of the dormitory. He didn’t make it to the hospital but found Xu Shanshan at the corner of the neighboring girls’ dormitory’s outer wall, where stray cats and dogs usually lingered.
The petite girl sat there, looking like a mere dot from afar. As he approached, he saw her entire exposed body wrapped in white gauze, resembling a human-shaped cotton ball. Some places weren’t bandaged properly, seeping with blood.
Zhou Mo walked over slowly.
A pair of shoes stopped in front of Xu Shanshan.
Shanshan recognized the tomato-and-egg color. It was Zhou Mo. She had secretly checked the price once and was shocked, almost dropping her phone on her foot.
Usually, Shanshan would greet him kindly, but today she didn’t even have the strength to lift her head.
Zhou Mo raised his hand, hesitating: “Aren’t you…”
“The hospital is expensive. Insurance only covers half. I came back after they bandaged me. Half a year’s delivery earnings are gone,” Shanshan forced a smile.
Zhou Mo felt as if a hand was slowly tightening around his heart.
“Didn’t they… compensate you?” he swallowed.
“I’m lucky they didn’t kill me,” Shanshan said softly. “The counselor advanced the medical fees. He said I didn’t have to pay him back, but his monthly salary isn’t high,” Shanshan joked, “His wife is quite fierce.”
Zhou Mo’s eyelashes lowered, feeling a lump in his throat.
In the silence, Shanshan spoke gently: “I guess you saw the video and thought I was pitiful. It’s not that bad. Many classmates sent me messages. I’ve never received so much care even on my birthday. It’s a rare experience, quite blissful…”
Her voice was sweet, but tears fell to the ground with a “plop”.
Zhou Mo wanted to hug her but feared hurting her wounds.
Shanshan’s tears fell one after another.
Zhou Mo asked questions in a hoarse voice, and Shanshan answered one by one.
When her parents left, she was five. She pretended not to remember anything, but she remembered everything.
Then, she lived with relatives and moved through three welfare homes.
She didn’t know who to rely on, and no one was willing to be her support. While other children worried about homework and grades, she worried about having books to read, experiencing all kinds of treatment…
She should have learned to be tough and street-smart earlier. She should have been invulnerable.
How nice it would be to be invulnerable. If glass couldn’t cut her, she wouldn’t bleed. If she didn’t bleed, she wouldn’t go to the hospital. If she didn’t go to the hospital, she wouldn’t spend money.
Finally, she choked softly: “Can you stop asking… I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know anything… Of course, I’m sad… Of course, it hurts… But what’s the use… Sadness can’t be eaten, pain can’t fill the stomach…”
Zhou Mo slowly bent down, closing his reddened eyes, and very gently embraced her.
“You can let me be sad, and let me hurt,” he said in a low, hoarse voice.
Zhou Mo was rational, cold, and seemingly aloof. Shanshan was always full of vitality like wild grass struggling to survive in the cracks.
They were like two extremes, yet extremely similar—
Later, when Zhou Mo pursued Shanshan, he became playful and mischievous, full of energy like an old rogue. Shanshan was often embarrassed and annoyed by his teasing, wanting to scold him but not having the heart to, her ears silently burning.
Zhou Mo once lent Shanshan twenty thousand yuan. Shanshan scored 99 in her Securities Investment Techniques and Analysis course. She was nervous during her first real stock trading operation, but after a month, her account had… twenty thousand five hundred.
If it were anyone else, Zhou Mo wouldn’t have even looked.
But with Shanshan, he was happier than if he had made millions. He kissed her forehead: “My Shanshan is amazing!”
In his arms, Shanshan blushed and mumbled: “If I lose, I can’t afford to pay you back. I’m poor.”
Zhou Mo whispered something in her ear with a smile. Shanshan’s face turned bright red. She pushed him away, fanning her face while complaining: “You’re so annoying!”
Later, Shanshan had savings of tens of thousands, then hundreds of thousands. Her gifts to Zhou Mo went from thirty-yuan water bottles to thousand-yuan ties. She learned German as her second foreign language and received a full scholarship offer from abroad. She hoped to do well in graduate school, work in an investment bank for a few years, save more money, and then marry the shameless Zhou Mo, and have children. After recovering, she would get her four certificates and become an analyst. Because she would have more time, she liked the idea of raising and accompanying the children.
Due to Zhou’s self-reflection, Zhou Mo still wanted to enter banking, focusing on risk control. Zhou Mo was indeed excellent at empirical work. Perhaps one day he would become a man with a statue at Jiao Tong University, Xu Shanshan’s man, the father of their children.
Shanshan was very happy, jumping on their not-so-spacious but cozy bedroom bed: “I want to take a photo with the statue!”
Zhou Mo smiled and held her waist, pulling her down: “The real person is here. Want to book a kiss in advance?”
“No,” Shanshan frowned and refused, “I’m trying out lipstick colors.”
But she still obediently kissed him.
Zhou Mo smiled smugly.
During the winter break of Shanshan’s junior year, she needed an internship to enrich her resume. Zhou Mo was at the B City branch, but there were no internship vacancies there at the time. The A City branch had openings, and coincidentally, Zhou Zisheng was the president of the A City branch and could look after Shanshan. So Shanshan went to the credit review department of the A City branch.
Tang Yang went at the end of the year, while she went at the beginning.
After being with Zhou Mo for over a year, Shanshan was no longer the same as when she first entered university.
She was steady and capable in her work, but her appearance still evoked people’s affection. She smiled and said, “I don’t have parents, but I have a boyfriend. He’s excellent, and we have a good relationship.” Her legs were white, straight, and slender. Gan Yiming couldn’t take his eyes off her.
Shanshan wanted to tell Zhou Mo that the department head’s gaze made her uncomfortable, but she knew Zhou Mo and Zhou Zisheng had a good relationship. Zhou Zisheng had even foregone having children for Zhou Mo’s sake.
A Mo told her his uncle would take care of her, but surely his uncle wouldn’t fire the department head for her sake. If she told A Mo about this, would he think his uncle hadn’t taken good care of her, or would he think she was being delicate and trying to sow discord…
No matter how shrewd Shanshan was in other matters, she was still a blank slate when it came to relationships. Her only experience with love came from A Mo. When it came to anything related to A Mo, she was always hesitant and cautious.
After hesitating several times, she thought, it was just three months, she could endure it.
But after all, she was still a student, and when faced with “difficult problems,” work mistakes were bound to happen. Gan Yiming kept her behind to lecture her and poured her a glass of water.
Shanshan had been running around all day for credit card matters and was thirsty, so she took a sip. As Gan Yiming kept talking, he started to multiply in Shanshan’s eyes, becoming two Gan Yimings, three, four, five…
When Shanshan woke up, she was lying on the sofa in Gan Yiming’s office.
Her head felt like it was filled with heavy iron. In front of her was Gan Yiming’s greasy smile. Shanshan’s pupils suddenly constricted, and then she saw all her clothes and a used condom on the floor.
Gan Yiming said: “I transferred ten thousand yuan to your card. Students probably don’t have much money…”
Shanshan didn’t cry or make a fuss. She didn’t say much. She put on her clothes one by one, calmly left, calmly took a taxi to the hospital, calmly searched online, and calmly went to the gynecology department to have Gan Yiming’s residual bodily fluids removed from her body. She wanted to call the police. She calmly pressed the three numbers, but just before it connected, she suddenly threw her phone.
Shanshan leaned against the bathroom door, slowly sliding down into a squatting position. She buried her head between her knees. Warm liquid flowed onto her leg skin, and as it flowed, whimpering sounds emerged. Finally, she was helpless and sad, sobbing one after another, crying inconsolably…
What kind of person was A Mo? He was her boyfriend, a very good person, someone who made her feel that all the hardships she had endured were for the sake of meeting him.
But why did she have to encounter such a thing after having A Mo…
Shanshan stayed in the bathroom for an entire night.
Early the next morning, she called Zhou Mo, forcing herself to calmly recount the entire process, then apologized nervously: “A Mo, I’m sorry,” her voice was very, very small, “I’m sorry, I didn’t know there was a problem with the water… I’m sorry, I didn’t think to take that cup with me at the time… Is it true that even if I report it to the police, there’s no evidence? A Mo, I’m, really, really sorry…”
Tears streamed down her face again. She should have told him earlier, she should have resigned. A Mo had taught her the good things about sex, but she didn’t know sex could make people so bad, so bad. Shanshan punched her head repeatedly. So bad…