The last time Shang Zhitao cried in front of Luan Nian was several years ago.

That day she broke down, leading Luke away from his home, walking in the snow for a very long time. Luan Nian remembered that day—he had followed behind her but never stepped forward.

Later, he regretted countless times: why hadn’t he stepped forward to embrace her when she was sobbing?

Luan Nian walked up to her, sighed, and pulled her into his arms. Shang Zhitao’s forehead pressed against his chest, still maintaining a distance between them, as she cried. Tears seeped into Luan Nian’s clothes, dampening his heart. He wanted to embrace her tightly, but sensed her resistance. So he loosened his hold, allowing her head to rest against him.

After she finished wiping her tears, feeling a bit awkward, she thanked him, gently pushed him away, and stepped back.

“Are you here to see Luke?”

“Yes. I wanted to come as soon as the lockdown ended, but I was delayed by many things.”

“Alright, I’ll bring him down. Please wait.”

Shang Zhitao went upstairs to fetch Luke. They hadn’t seen each other for several months, and Luke went crazy again. He carried his leash in his mouth, offering it to Luan Nian, wanting Luan Nian to walk him in circles. Twice during this time, Shang Zhitao said they should go home, but Luke either sat down firmly or pulled his neck back, refusing to return home.

“It’s okay, I’ll walk him a bit more.”

“No need, come up and play with him.”

“Is that convenient?” Luan Nian asked her.

When had Luan Nian ever asked if it was convenient before? He always did whatever he wanted, forever willful. Shang Zhitao thought seriously: “It’s fine, come up.”

Hearing this, Luke pulled Luan Nian forward: “Quick, let’s go home.”

As soon as he entered, Luke drank half a bowl of water—he was dying of thirst after walking outside for so long. After drinking, he grunted and lay down, watching Luan Nian and Shang Zhitao.

Shang Zhitao brought Luan Nian a pair of slippers and pointed to the sofa: “Have a seat.”

“Okay.”

This was Luan Nian’s first visit to Shang Zhitao’s home. Her place was decorated warmly, especially the bookshelf wall in the living room, which was extremely cozy.

“May I look around?” he asked Shang Zhitao.

“Sure.”

Shang Zhitao showed Luan Nian around her home. She had converted one bedroom into a gym, and the other two bedrooms—the master and secondary—were both decorated simply.

“Have a seat, I’ll boil some water,” Shang Zhitao told him, then went to do so.

Luan Nian stood in front of the bookshelf, randomly pulled out a book, and found a reading note tucked in the first page. The handwriting was strong and forceful, but not Shang Zhitao’s.

Shang Zhitao’s handwriting wasn’t like that. Luan Nian gently put the book back.

“Is warm water okay? I don’t have any cold drinks, haven’t had time to buy any. Besides, we’re all getting older, it’s better not to drink anything too cold.”

…

Luan Nian instinctively wanted to say something to her, but remembered Tan Mian and others repeatedly cautioning him before he came: “Don’t mess things up.” So he swallowed his words and accepted the water from Shang Zhitao.

“What happened to you just now?”

“Nothing, I just got the money from mortgaging my property and felt a bit uncomfortable in my heart.”

“Why did you mortgage your property?”

“Because our company is barely hanging on. This year, there are fewer companies organizing events. Employee expenses and rent all require money, and we still have several hundred thousand in final payments that haven’t been collected.”

“Mm.” Luan Nian made a sound and lowered his head to drink.

“What do you want to say? Go ahead.”

“I want to ask, what’s wrong with you? You run a company without a backup plan? Going all-in on one path? Oh, you want to be an agent, so why didn’t you start earlier?” Luan Nian couldn’t hold back; he was quite intimidating when serious.

“I didn’t have startup capital.”

“I do.”

Luan Nian’s “I do” made Shang Zhitao quiet. She looked at him. In the past, she had been extremely dependent on him. Whenever she encountered any problem, she would think: “I need to consult Luke; Luke will guide me.” But now she had moved beyond that dependence and established her mental framework. She even disliked that kind of dependence.

She took out her bank card and placed it on the table: “I’ve mortgaged my property, sold my car, and I have some savings. I can start over.”

“Luan Nian, I don’t need your help. Although I know you mean well, thank you, but this time I want to rely on myself. In the future, I also want to rely on myself.”

Shang Zhitao didn’t like being dependent.

Since she had burned her bridges, she was prepared to have nothing, yet she still wanted to make things work. After all, more than a dozen people were waiting for her decisions.

“Then why were you crying just now?”

“…I don’t know. I cry when I want to cry. Do I need a good reason to cry?”

Luke sensed the tension between them and suddenly stood up, ran between them, sat facing Luan Nian, and stuck out his tongue.

“You don’t need a reason to cry, but now you need to think about what I’m going to do without clothes to wear.”

“What do you mean? Aren’t you wearing clothes right now?”

“I don’t like going out in dirty clothes.”

“I’ll buy you some now.”

Shang Zhitao stood up and headed out, with Luan Nian following behind her.

“I thought you didn’t like going out in dirty clothes?”

“Do you buy clothes without trying them on? Do you know my size?”

“Can’t we just buy anything?”

“I’m never casual about these things.”

Shang Zhitao no longer had a car, and Luan Nian hadn’t driven over. The two stood at the roadside after leaving the building. Luan Nian, hands in his pockets, watched Shang Zhitao trying to hail a taxi, sweat beads hanging from her nose tip. Suddenly, he remembered the first business trip to Guangzhou, that moment during dinner when his eyes swept across her face and he lost focus.

“How does it feel to have nothing?” Luan Nian asked her.

Shang Zhitao looked up at him: “Pretty awful, but also pretty great. After all, I’m a gambler too.” She laughed spontaneously, still that vivacious girl.

Well, best of luck to you!

It seemed they had never gone shopping together before.

Entering the mall, Shang Zhitao wanted to head straight for the men’s clothing store, but Luan Nian veered into a coffee shop, ordered an iced Americano, a bottle of soda water, and a slice of cake, then sat by the window.

He pushed the soda water to Shang Zhitao, and they sat facing each other.

Ice City’s weather approaching summer was quite comfortable. For once, they weren’t arguing and had put aside past issues, just sitting together for a while.

Luan Nian shared some things with Shang Zhitao.

He talked about his parents returning to China, how he would visit them in the city for dinner every week. He also mentioned Song Qiuhan and Chen Kuannian, whom Shang Zhitao had met, and spoke about Song Qiuhan and Lin Chuner, Chen Kuannian and Xiao Mei.

He spoke intermittently, but she listened attentively to everything.

When he mentioned Chen Kuannian, Shang Zhitao said, “Thanks to him. He paid the final payment for the collection exhibition on time, just before payday.”

Luan Nian’s mouth twitched slightly. Chen Kuannian wouldn’t dare to default; he had watched over him as he made the transfer.

“So, how do you plan to handle advertising agency work?” Luan Nian asked her seriously.

“I have a roommate who’s now responsible for commercialization at an internet company. I’ve learned about some current industry situations from him and am preparing to start learning.”

“Learning what?”

“Various advertising practitioner certificates.” Shang Zhitao thought for a moment: “Internet advertising is different from the advertising formats at Lingmei before. Although the underlying logic is connected, many practices are different. So I plan for our whole company to first obtain certifications. No rush to start working—enter the job with certificates.”

Luan Nian nodded: “What about clients? In this agency system, the lower markets are doing well, and clients are being divided up.”

“Some of the shopping malls and real estate clients I’ve worked with before have agreed to give us money for testing. So I’m thinking of applying for these two tracks first.”

“That’s good.”

“Don’t you have any other suggestions?”

“Didn’t you say you wanted to rely on yourself?”

“But I can still listen to your suggestions.”

“My suggestion is: just do it, believe in yourself.” Luan Nian stood up: “Let’s go buy clothes.”

“Alright.”

Shang Zhitao took him to the men’s clothing floor: “Pick a store. I don’t know which brands you like.”

Luan Nian randomly walked into a store and pointed at a garment: “This one.”

The salesperson, seeing his excellent demeanor, persuaded him: “There’s a discount now, you can buy several pieces.”

Luan Nian turned to ask Shang Zhitao: “Two pieces?”

To outsiders, it sounded like he was being kept by her.

Shang Zhitao was a bit stunned and said: “One piece.”

“Then you pay.”

“?”

“What else? I pay? Why?”

Shang Zhitao noticed the salesperson’s strange expression and didn’t want to argue with him. She paid and walked out of the mall: “Why don’t you change into it?”

“It hasn’t been washed yet.”

She had known before that Luan Nian was somewhat of a germophobe, but she hadn’t expected that after all this time, his germophobia would still be there. But now she truly respected people’s diversity more, so she nodded: “Then wash it when you get back before wearing it.”

“Alright.”

It was dusk. Luan Nian watched her standing in the twilight, a clean and simple person. His heart stirred a bit.

“Shang Zhitao, I’ll come see Luke again tomorrow, and then head to the airport. If there’s an opportunity in the future, I’ll come again.”

“You can come see Luke anytime.”

“Good.”

Luan Nian stepped closer to her, looking into her eyes: “There’s one thing I feel I need to tell you personally. Back when you applied for the expert position, there were two abnormal questionnaires. They weren’t graded by me. If you can still remember, the one with the highest comprehensive score was mine. You always asked me to be fair, and I was. Now I ask you: do you believe me?”

Shang Zhitao’s eyes heated up. She knew—less than half a year after she left, Grace left Lingmei due to bribery and unfair competition. With Luan Nian’s temperament, he should have sent her to jail, but her child was young, so Luan Nian showed mercy. The other low-scoring questionnaire came from another expert evaluator. The company sent an all-staff email, and after she reconnected with Lumi, Lumi immediately sent her screenshots, telling her: “You deserve it.”

“So, my score represents my attitude toward you. If you felt that when you first joined Lingmei, your level was poor, you lacked confidence, and even when you left you felt that I looked down on you, then I want to clarify: when you joined, you were indeed poor, but when you left, you were the best employee I had ever managed.”

Shang Zhitao suddenly recalled those six years—coming and going through wind and rain, not daring to stop for a moment, those six years she had gritted her teeth through.

With tears in her eyes, she said to Luan Nian: “Thank you.”

“You can cry now, don’t hold back. It’s not like you haven’t cried today.”

Luan Nian was quite a mood-killer; he would always pour cold water on you at any moment. Shang Zhitao laughed angrily, wiping away tears with her fingertips: “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

Luan Nian turned and left.

Tan Mian and others had told him: “Between people, you must exchange hearts.” He was just beginning to learn that love is a long process of cultivation. Only he had learned too late—he had already missed the time when Shang Zhitao loved him.

Shang Zhitao watched Luan Nian leave. After returning home, she arranged an online meeting. Her new partners all came online. Fu Dong led several people to transition into sales, while the rest were assigned to Fu Dong’s classmate Fang Ke to work with other girls as pitchers and operators.

Shang Zhitao said in the meeting: “I know we’re starting late, and I know this doesn’t seem like the best timing, but I’ve mortgaged my property and sold my car, and I’m not looking back.”

“So, comrades, are we ready to begin the battle?”