Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. This saying didn’t entirely match Wei Caiwei’s opinion of Wang Daxia – men’s clothing was fine, but women’s clothing was not. Really not acceptable.

Wei Caiwei felt that while Wang Daxia in women’s clothing was indeed beautiful, he was too vulgar and gaudy – like a bowl of greasy braised pork that needed to be paired with plain rice and vegetables to be palatable. She couldn’t eat just a bowl of braised pork by itself – it was too rich.

But one man after another could stomach Wang Daxia’s type of rich, saucy braised pork beauty. At first glance, they’d salivate with desire. Everyone had different tastes.

A treasured sword suits a hero; rough men like braised pork – it’s not the braised pork’s fault.

Wei Caiwei said: “It’s like a turtle eyeing mung beans – they hit it off at first sight. There’s no helping it.”

Wang Daxia felt saved: “Doctor Wei truly understands me. Tie Niu secretly scratched my palm three times and pinched it three times. I couldn’t very well cry out, so I smiled at him three times. I didn’t expect him to be so direct – thinking my three smiles showed affection, he immediately appointed Lu Ying as Incense Master, wanting to get close to me first.”

“I think this is an opportunity to infiltrate the enemy camp. When Qi’s army finishes eliminating the scattered wokou outside, they’ll eventually attack Xinghua City. Then I can act as an inside agent, kill Tie Niu, and the wokou’s morale will crumble. You can then coordinate from inside and out – eliminating both wokou and the White Lotus Sect.”

Lu Ying said: “That may be so, but the risk is too high. At the Three Connections Inn in the capital when we set the honey trap for that stinking Daoist, we had Military Officer Wu helping with the act and brothers outside posing as customers to protect you – you could be as wild as you wanted. But in Xinghua City, you’d be going alone into the tiger’s den. If Tie Niu takes liberties and you’re exposed, you’re dead.”

Lu Ying wasn’t someone who sought glory recklessly or pushed subordinates out as cannon fodder. Safety was always her first consideration – if there was real danger, she’d rather charge ahead herself.

Wang Daxia was unconcerned: “Don’t worry, I know how to deal with men. Besides, I’m not alone – there’s still Ding Wu. He’s formidable now, resourceful and clever. He’ll help me.”

Wang Daxia thrust out his belly: “Plus, I have a child for protection. No matter how lustful the Bright King is, he surely wouldn’t… with a pregnant woman, right?”

Due to Wang Daxia’s ample chest and curves, today’s bright red wide-sleeved robe was loose, so he didn’t look pregnant – at most like someone who’d eaten too much.

Lu Ying and Wei Caiwei exchanged glances: Who would have thought “being with child” could be useful this way – truly a lucky accident.

Wei Caiwei went next door to find Luo Longwen with a mournful expression, telling him about the Bright King scratching Wang Daxia’s palm: “…So it was true. She said that to protect us, she couldn’t cry out on the spot, so she smiled at the Bright King three times out of affection. She was also helpless – it’s not that she’s promiscuous, falling for everyone she meets.”

Hearing this, Luo Longwen thought of Wang Cuiqiao, elegant as an orchid in an empty valley, who was also captured by the pirate chief Xu Hai and forced to become his wife.

Sigh, another Cuiqiao sacrificing herself to the tiger.

Luo Longwen asked: “What does her husband think?”

Wei Caiwei said: “Boss Ximen’s facial wound hasn’t even been sutured yet. She asked me to keep it secret and not tell her husband.”

Luo Longwen said: “So she still has feelings for her husband.”

“She feels guilty,” Wei Caiwei said. “Boss Ximen has never wronged her. Our secret affair has already hurt him – she doesn’t want to disturb his recovery too. Now we just hope the Bright King, seeing she’s pregnant, won’t touch her.”

Luo Longwen said: “Wokou are cruel and have no moral principles. Don’t be too naive.”

“Then what can we do?” Wei Caiwei’s face was full of worry. “I’m powerless – I can’t fight over ten thousand wokou.”

In the past, Luo Longwen wouldn’t have taken ten thousand wokou seriously – he had even captured great pirate chiefs like Xu Hai. But now the age of great pirates had passed, with pirates scattered into small groups. Like a fallen tiger bullied by dogs, he could barely protect himself – how could he help a pair of lovers?

Luo Longwen sighed: “I’m sorry, I can’t help you anymore.” Fate was so similar – beauties would ultimately be possessed by pirates.

Wei Caiwei cooperated with long sighs, showing genuine emotion: You were born to be a beauty, but alas you have a man’s body.

However, Wei Caiwei still had a solution. She prepared medicine and taught Wang Daxia hand-by-hand how to respond.

Early the next morning, White Lotus Sect members came knocking. Bang bang bang at the door. Lu Ying, with his centipede face on the right side, opened the door: “We joined the White Lotus Sect yesterday, there’s yellow paper on the door, and I’m an Incense Master personally appointed by the Bright King. Why are you bothering us early in the morning? Isn’t joining supposed to avoid calamity?”

The sect members were startled by Lu Ying’s centipede face and said: “The Bright King has ordered that fellow believer Madam Ximen come help handle sect affairs.” White Lotus Sect members of the same rank called each other “fellow believers.”

Finally, it was time. Lu Ying blocked the doorway: “My wife is feeling unwell and hasn’t gotten up yet. She’ll probably come later.”

The sect members said: “No problem, the Bright King sent a carriage to fetch Madam Ximen. She’ll arrive quickly.”

Lu Ying invited the sect members in: “Fellow believers, please sit. I’ll go upstairs to wake her.”

Wang Daxia deliberately dawdled, taking almost half an hour to finish dressing. Today he changed into peach pink, with two freshly bloomed crabapple flowers pinned in his hair, making him even more enchanting.

Before leaving, Wang Daxia instructed Lu Ying: “Husband, rest well at home and recover. Don’t let your wound get wet. I’ll be back soon.”

Wang Daxia arrived at the White Lotus Sect headquarters – the former county yamen. Ding Wu as advisor and Wei Caiwei as military physician had already arrived early. Both watched Wang Daxia sway his slender waist as he entered the courtyard, worrying for him – too seductive, the Bright King probably couldn’t resist.

Indeed, as soon as Wang Daxia entered the county magistrate’s office, the Bright King slammed the door shut with a bang and locked it with the door bar!

The Bright King tried to embrace Wang Daxia, but Wang Daxia played circle-around with him using a round table, chasing each other in quite a lively scene.

The Bright King rubbed his hands impatiently: “Beauty, I wanted you to come find me at midnight yesterday. Why didn’t you come at all?”

“Huh?” Wang Daxia was stunned. “When did the Bright King say you wanted me to meet privately at midnight?”

The Bright King explained: “I scratched your palm three times and touched your hand three times – that meant a midnight rendezvous. Long ago, when the Fifth Patriarch transmitted Buddhist dharma to Master Huineng, he tapped the stone Huineng was pounding three times, meaning Huineng should come to his room at midnight. In Journey to the West, when Patriarch Subodhi transmitted skills to Sun Wukong, he also tapped his head three times, wanting him to come learn at midnight. How did you not understand my meaning?”

Wang Daxia truly hadn’t thought in that direction. This Tie Niu actually had so many subtle thoughts. He said: “Even if I understood, midnight wouldn’t work. After all, I have a husband sleeping beside me, and a bunch of bodyguards living downstairs. It’s inconvenient to come out at night.”

The Bright King waved his hand grandly: “That’s no problem. With one word from me, they could all disappear today and won’t disturb us.”

Wang Daxia’s heart clenched, but he laughed: “A wife is inferior to a concubine, a concubine inferior to a lover. I met the Bright King by chance – a fleeting romance that needs the excitement of an affair. Without a husband, what fun would there be? Please don’t say such frightening things again – I won’t have it.”

Seeing the beauty act coquettish, the Bright King said: “Fine, I’ll do as you wish. Come here, let me kiss you.”

Wang Daxia waved his handkerchief: “The Bright King must swear an oath first.”

The Bright King swore to heaven he wouldn’t harm Lu Ying, then reached out to embrace and kiss him.

Wang Daxia saw it was about time, so he covered his forehead and sat on a stool: “Oh my.”

The Bright King quickly asked: “What’s wrong, beauty?”

Wang Daxia twisted his handkerchief: “I left too hurriedly this morning and haven’t eaten breakfast. I’m dizzy.”

“Why didn’t you say so earlier? I have plenty of food here.” The Bright King opened the door and had someone bring pastries and fine wine, wanting to get the beauty drunk to accomplish his goal sooner.

Thus, the Bright King watched Wang Daxia eat a bowl of wonton noodles, a plate of osmanthus rice cakes, a bowl of red bean soup dumplings, wine grain balls… My heavens, this beauty eats even more than I do.

When Wang Daxia drank wine, the Bright King tried to steal kisses again. Wang Daxia placed the wine cup marked with his bright red lip print at the Bright King’s lips: “Come, drink three cups of mine first.”

The Bright King pressed against the red lip print and drank three cups in succession. His feet began to sway – perhaps because he’d waited for the beauty until midnight last night, and when she never came, he didn’t sleep well. Today he seemed to have poor alcohol tolerance, getting dizzy after just three cups.

After three cups, the lip prints were all over the Bright King’s lips. Wang Daxia covered his mouth with his handkerchief, laughing until the crabapple flowers in his hair trembled, with pink petals shaken loose by his laughter, falling onto the beauty’s shoulders.

The Bright King immediately felt dazzled by the profusion of flowers, his feet went soft, and his vision blurred.

The Bright King lunged toward the beauty, but the beauty reacted nimbly like a monkey, avoiding his embrace while lifting one long leg to rest his foot on the wine table. Under the pink skirt was a stretch of white, chopstick-straight calf!

The beauty wasn’t wearing pants today! Like a slender willow tree for anyone to break, arousing spring desires.

What a treasure he’d found. The Bright King lunged toward the long leg, wanting to take a bite.

But Wang Daxia withdrew his leg with a beautiful spin, simultaneously kicking off his bright red embroidered shoe and pouring all the wine from the jar into the shoe: “If the Bright King can drink another shoe of mine, then you can do whatever you want with me, absolutely no objections.”

The Bright King looked at the bright red shoe – it was like a boat. The beauty’s feet seemed even bigger than his own?

Wang Daxia pouted his bright red lips: “If you won’t drink, it means you despise me. I’m leaving.”

“I’ll drink, I’ll drink.” The Bright King held the bright red embroidered shoe and drained it in one gulp.

The wine contained medicine Wei Caiwei had prepared. After the Bright King drank it, he collapsed toward Wang Daxia and immediately blacked out. His last clear memory was his head buried in the beauty’s mountain-like peaks, warm, soft, and fragrant.

Wang Daxia easily hoisted the Bright King onto his shoulder, entered the bedroom, placed him on the bed, then used brute force to tear off the Bright King’s clothes and his own as well. He scattered the torn clothes and shoes from the parlor wine table all the way to the bed, creating the appearance of debauchery and faked a post-drinking affair scene.

This wasn’t enough. Wang Daxia looked at the naked Bright King and remembered Wei Caiwei’s instructions from last night. He reached out and scratched several bloody marks on the Bright King’s chest, especially his back.

Wei Caiwei had also said it would be best to bite several rows of teeth marks on the Bright King’s shoulder.

But Wang Daxia looked at the Bright King’s muscular shoulders and really couldn’t bring himself to do it. Scratching his body was already the limit of what he could manage.

Just the scratch marks made Wang Daxia’s imagination run wild – if there were bite marks, then…

Wei Caiwei was clearly unmarried, so how did she seem to know so much?

He didn’t dare ask. Sigh.

Author’s Note: Banxia: Don’t ask – if you ask, it’s because I’ve slept with someone.