◎ Happy Birthday! ◎

No matter how Luo Peiyin kissed her hand, Gu Qiao kept her face covered and refused to let go.

She didn’t know whether to blame herself for being so weak or to blame the dexterity of his fingers. Luo Peiyin’s fingers moved like someone working the dial of an old-fashioned combination safe — because he didn’t know the combination the first time, he tried again and again. A safe has no expression, but a person does. With each repeated turn and probe and exploration, he came closer and closer to the right answer.

As he approached the answer, Gu Qiao’s breathing grew more and more urgent, and Luo Peiyin’s fingers were drawn in ever more tightly. It was as though a warm, moist little mouth was sucking at his fingers, clinging to them, reluctant to let him go.

The more embarrassed Gu Qiao became, the more she was tormented by shame — and yet his fingers were drawn in even more tightly. Luo Peiyin found the completely correct answer within Gu Qiao’s bashfulness. His fingers repeated the answer, as though seeking her confirmation.

Desire slowly grew, spreading along every branch and fork of her body, coursing through every nerve ending. One of Gu Qiao’s hands was intertwined with Luo Peiyin’s; the other pressed over her face.

Gu Qiao could find nothing to hold onto to keep herself still. She could only curl her toes and grip the bedsheets with all her strength, trying to keep herself from twisting and writhing out of control.

The red water-drop earrings on her ears swayed ceaselessly, making the parts of her face not covered by her hand grow redder and redder.

In the dim light, a healthy, slender, vital young woman wrestled with her own desire. Her ivory complexion had been dyed a deep red. She was working very hard to restrain herself — you could even see it in the flushed color of her toenails. But the harder she tried to overcome it, the more her efforts disappointed her.

Not only was it the first time Luo Peiyin had ever seen Gu Qiao like this — it was also the first time Gu Qiao had ever known this side of herself. This version of herself was entirely beyond her imagination and expectations. Although Luo Peiyin hadn’t said a single word, hadn’t laughed at her, she had already laughed at herself first. She had always believed her mind was fully capable of controlling her body. During the times when she didn’t see Luo Peiyin and there was no intimacy between them, Gu Qiao’s imagination of physical relationships had been extremely limited — and because her imagination was limited, so too was her longing. She had even hoped that Luo Peiyin wouldn’t place too much importance on physical contact. Only someone who didn’t care much about it could endure keeping himself pure for her across an ocean all these years. Even with him returning to China right after his doctoral graduation, they had been apart for far too long.

Could someone ruled by desire endure months of not seeing each other, not even holding hands?

But now Gu Qiao found herself completely helpless against her own reactions. She simply abandoned any pretense of control, continuing to press her fingers firmly over half her face to prevent him from seeing her expression.

Luo Peiyin went to kiss the fingers covering Gu Qiao’s face. Her earrings swayed back and forth, but she seemed to have made up her mind — she absolutely refused to uncover her face.

“The fact that you want me this much makes me very happy.”

Gu Qiao’s fingers trembled slightly under his kisses.

“Stop covering your face. If you don’t want me to look, I’ll close my eyes.”

Luo Peiyin’s fingers had lit a fire inside her, burning her whole being red. Gu Qiao wasn’t sure whether Luo Peiyin was looking at her or not. Her fingers slowly parted, leaving a narrow gap for her eyes to peer through — and Luo Peiyin really had closed his eyes. She slowly moved her hands away from her face. She saw how long his lashes were. She couldn’t resist blowing on them softly, like a spring breeze passing over a wheat field. He opened his eyes. His deliberately lowered lashes veiled the desire and the flash of sharpness within — and because his earlobes were very red, it gave him a kind of gentle, mildly intoxicated tenderness.

He leaned in close to look at her flushed face: “You’re really adorable.”

Gu Qiao rarely failed to say thank you when someone complimented her. She only bit her lip.

Luo Peiyin’s fingers slowly withdrew from their warm enclosure as he watched Gu Qiao’s face, as if trying to recapture all the moments she had spent hiding behind her hands.

Luo Peiyin did nothing at all — he simply looked at Gu Qiao. She felt as though his gaze were running over her entire body, and she grew hotter and hotter. In this situation she had nowhere to hide, so the boldness buried in her bones surfaced again. She met his gaze directly. She reached out and touched Luo Peiyin’s ear: “Your ears are red too.” She wasn’t the only one.

Luo Peiyin no longer used his lashes to veil the desire in his eyes. He stared intently at Gu Qiao, then once again took her fingers and guided them to touch the gift she had given him. That gift was unwrapped by Gu Qiao’s trembling hands.

The red water-drop earrings on Gu Qiao’s ears leapt and bounced, swaying without any discernible rhythm, casting her face alternately pale and red. Beads of sweat had gathered at the tip of her nose, and a fine, dense layer of perspiration covered her face. She bit down on her teeth and furrowed her brow, enduring the pain, and said in a low voice, “Xiao Luo — wait a moment — not yet—” But the “Xiao Luo” she called to paid her no attention. Later she began calling out “cousin-brother.” In her subconscious, she had always felt that cousin-brother would be more reluctant to see her suffer. She called softly for cousin-brother, and the “mmm” sounds that had been suppressed behind her clenched teeth spilled out along with his name.

But he seemed not to hear. The red earrings swayed more violently, and that softly called “cousin-brother” shattered amidst the swinging of the earrings.

Luo Peiyin took Gu Qiao’s two hands and wrapped them around his back. Even as he drove firmly into her deepest depths, he tenderly kissed her face. Many fingerprints appeared on his back — every single one sunk deep into the skin. Gu Qiao was battered by waves with nowhere to go, and could only grip him fiercely.

The red earrings swayed on and on without tiring, shifting from their initial complete irregularity into a rhythmic back-and-forth pattern.

Gu Qiao’s face, covered in a fine sheen of sweat, gradually regained its color in the steady rhythm of the red earrings’ swaying — little by little, she flushed rosy and warm.

The curtains blocked out the daylight, along with the sandy scraping sound of wind against the glass outside. The wind grew stronger and stronger, with no telling where it would sweep the dust and sand. Gu Qiao thought of the swing set she’d played on as a child — first the rhythmic testing of it, and then, once she found the feeling, gripping the ropes tightly and swinging higher and higher. She was driven by a curiosity about the unknown, swinging higher and higher — yet even someone as daring as she was would never swing on a windy day.

When the sound of collision stopped, Gu Qiao’s earrings still swayed on their own — only gradually slowing. Gu Qiao lay with her eyes closed, waiting for her breathing to slowly calm. Then she felt the whole world grow quiet, and a long arm wrapped around her. She slowly opened her eyes and looked at the person who had caused her pain earlier. Though the latter part had held more than just pain, it had been, in another way, its own kind of torment.

She didn’t know whether other couples were like this, or whether only he was this way with her. It was the first time she had ever thought of Luo Peiyin as a little bit cruel — even if the pain he gave her had also been tender.

Gu Qiao grabbed hold of Luo Peiyin’s arm as if to use every last ounce of her remaining strength to brand a mark on him, then bit down hard on it. She was going to give every bit of the pain he had given her right back to him. He was quite audacious about it — he didn’t make a single sound, not even a muffled grunt. She raised her eyes to look at him. He was only gazing at her face, and even extended his other arm toward her mouth. Gu Qiao bared her teeth and made a show of biting down on this arm too, but when she actually did, it was very light. While he had been hurting her, she had not been gentle with him either. The fingerprints on his back were still clearly visible, showing no signs of fading.

She raised her eyes to look at him: “Next time, don’t hurt me this much.”

Luo Peiyin cupped her chin and kissed her gently. As he kissed her, he reached up to remove the earrings from her ears. During all the swaying earlier, they had occasionally grazed her cheek, though they hadn’t cut her. His fingers were equally gentle and careful. Every inch of Gu Qiao’s skin received tender treatment once again, as though the person who had made her hurt more when she called out in pain had been someone else entirely.

After a long period of soothing, Luo Peiyin tucked Gu Qiao into the covers. With her eyes closed, Gu Qiao listened to the sound of running water from the bathroom. When the water stopped, perhaps less than ten minutes later, she sensed someone approaching. She opened her eyes slightly and saw a fully dressed Luo Peiyin. He was wearing long trousers and a turtleneck sweater, his hair not yet fully dry. He bent down to the level of the bed, drew her head out from under the covers, and asked softly: “Would you like me to fill the bathtub for you?”

“I can just shower — don’t worry about me.”

“There’s a noodle restaurant nearby that’s very good. Once you’ve washed up, I’ll take you out for birthday noodles.”

Gu Qiao was carried to the bathroom. She was like a child who needed looking after — even working up the lather required someone else to do it for her. From her hair to the backs of her knees and ankles, she was covered in white foam, her entire body seeming to be submerged in a white bubble. Yet even so, the girl standing beneath the showerhead, no matter how one looked at her, was a young woman who had fully come into her own.

Hot water cascaded down from above, dispersing the white foam and washing it all away, returning her skin to its natural color. When the showerhead was turned off, drops of warm water still lingered on Gu Qiao’s body.

Luo Peiyin took a dry towel to help Gu Qiao dry her hair. He looked down at her face, and in the steam-filled bathroom, a flush spread across Gu Qiao’s entire face once more, her lips especially rosy. She bit her lower lip, as though yearning to be kissed. Luo Peiyin bent down to kiss Gu Qiao’s soft lips.

The bathroom floor was a little slippery — one could easily fall. Gu Qiao’s knees trembled involuntarily, and Luo Peiyin reached out and caught her around the waist.

An hour later, Gu Qiao took another hot shower. This time it was in the bathtub — she truly had no strength left to stand. On a slippery bathroom floor, having been pressed and braced against someone for such a long time was extremely draining on one’s body.

The curtains were still drawn, but Gu Qiao knew that outside, dusk was nearly falling. Luo Peiyin’s fingers were threaded through Gu Qiao’s hair, using the hair dryer to dry it.

“Don’t worry — the two of us will have that certificate someday. When that day comes, you won’t need to play the role of the fake tomboy anymore.”

Gu Qiao didn’t know why her nose suddenly stung. She tilted her head back to hold back the tears threatening to fall, and said with a smile: “Does that mean you don’t like my short hair now?”

“When I first fell for you, you were already a girl with short hair.” Although back then, he had thought that with over ten thousand kilometers between them, the feelings would fade sooner or later. Not just his for her, but also hers for him. Time and distance had confirmed the answer for him.

Gu Qiao stood still, letting the hair dryer blow through her short hair.

“Don’t worry — it won’t be long before we can see each other all the time.” Luo Peiyin’s fingers moved through Gu Qiao’s hair. “If you had continued studying back then, what major would you have chosen in university?”

Gu Qiao actually gave it careful thought: “Something related to computers, I think.”

That was not the answer Luo Peiyin had expected from her: “Why?”

Gu Qiao answered earnestly: “There’s a learning machine that’s selling incredibly well right now — they call it a budget computer. I think it has a very promising future. If I’d studied computer science, maybe I could go into that business later. With something that has a barrier to entry, fewer people can come and take your market share.”

Luo Peiyin stared at Gu Qiao: “Setting aside making money — what would you study?”

“Setting aside making money, setting aside making money…” She genuinely couldn’t think of an answer right away.

“No rush on that. You must be hungry by now — let’s go out for noodles.”

Gu Qiao shook her head. She didn’t even have the energy to step out of the room — she could only lie in bed and get a good sleep.

“I’m not hungry. You go and eat. It’s getting late, and my father is still waiting for you.”

Lou Deyu lay in his hospital bed as a middle-aged woman asked him: “What would you like for dinner? I’ll go to the cafeteria and get it for you.”

Lou Deyu let out a sigh. That young man surnamed Luo had spent twenty yuan to hire this woman to get him food and water — and only for half a day, at that. He tried to negotiate with her to return half the money to him so he could get his own water, but she refused. What reckless spending — money doesn’t just blow in on the wind; it must have come straight from his parents. In this respect, the Luo boy had it better than Gu Qiao. He had a good father! Thinking this, Deyu cursed silently to himself. When would his daughter ever have a wealthy father?

At that moment he was not especially worried about Gu Qiao. In broad daylight, two young men and women checking into a hotel — they would always be asked for a marriage certificate. The two of them would probably only be able to walk around outside. But then what would happen when she came back? Ah! The benefits of having a good father came with the expectation of following that good father’s wishes. Someone raised to spend freely — how would they ever know how to live frugally?

Gu Qiao lay in bed, the curtains drawn, her body’s exhaustion reminding her of what had happened earlier. She closed her eyes, but the images pushed their way back in — she thought of his fingers, and her face flushed red again.

Gu Qiao struggled out from under the covers and got dressed. She had meant to go downstairs and get something to eat, but her lower back ached, so instead she pulled open the curtains and leaned on her chin, looking out at the night view.

First she heard the sound of the door lock turning — and then Gu Qiao saw Luo Peiyin: “Why have you come back?”

“Don’t worry. I found someone to look after your father. Have something to eat.”

He had bought not only noodles, but also a thermos and utensils. The noodles and soup were packed separately.

“If I’d known, I would’ve just gone out with you — all this trouble.”

“I don’t find it troublesome.”

The noodles were longevity noodles — just a single strand. Gu Qiao asked Luo Peiyin: “What if I accidentally bite it in two?”

“Then that means you’ve lived the equivalent of two lifetimes in one.”

Gu Qiao burst out laughing.

“Happy Birthday!”

Gu Qiao lowered her head, then looked up at Luo Peiyin, her face red, a smile on her lips: “Today — I’ve actually been very happy.”

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