After speaking, without waiting for a response from the other end, Xie Ru He hung up the phone. He exhaled irritably, his rationality gradually returning, reluctantly acknowledging that most of what Fang Wen Cheng had said was correct.

Everything had to progress in proper sequence.

Although he longed to possess her, longed to give her—or perhaps himself—enough security through this method, longed to leave his mark on her, longed to understand her more deeply, longed to reach heaven in a single step.

Yet these were merely his thoughts.

Xie Ru He had even imagined that if Shu Nian didn’t want to go out, she only wanted to stay in this house, resisting the outside world. She would only see him, only have eyes for him, and wouldn’t think about anyone else.

Making him her pillar, unable to live without him.

That would be good too.

They would stay in this house forever.

Just the two of them.

Like two vines entangled in cold, damp soil, in a place without sunlight, relying on each other, clinging so tightly they couldn’t be separated.

But whenever Xie Ru He saw Shu Nian, saw anything related to her, or even just thought of her.

Such thoughts would instantly vanish.

From the first day, he met her until this very moment. Throughout these long years, all this time, every minute and every second, in Xie Ru He’s eyes, Shu Nian had always been radiant.

She was someone who should live in the light.

The world she saw should also be bright, all darkness should stay far away from her.

Xie Ru He sat on the sofa, lost in his thoughts for a while. Then, he sat up straight and touched the trackpad to brighten the computer screen. He licked his lips, hesitantly typing eight characters on the keyboard.

—Ten Yan Town serial killings.

Looking at the webpage, with each detail listed one by one, Xie Ru He’s expression grew increasingly pale. He clenched his jaw, his eyes darkening, his entire body tense, the veins at his temples visibly protruding.

After a long while, he closed the laptop firmly and shut his eyes tightly.

Xie Ru He had never paid attention to this incident before.

Because if he did, he would inevitably see various materials about Ji Xiang Ning’s victimization online again.

When Zeng Yuan Xue was arrested, he hadn’t yet returned to the country. The court had notified the family, and all the procedures and processes were handled by Ji Xing Huai.

It wasn’t until two months before the first trial verdict that Xie Ru He returned to the country.

He had hesitated for a long time, feeling he should accompany his grandfather and wanting to personally see the murderer face legal punishment. But on the way home, he had a car accident and remained in a coma for two months, and when he woke up, the court had already sentenced Zeng Yuan Xue to death.

Zeng Yuan Xue accepted the verdict in court without appeal.

He hadn’t paid attention to the incident after that, entering a long period of physical recovery and rehabilitation.

During that time, Xie Ru He had considered whether to find Shu Nian. As soon as he set foot on this land, knowing they were in the same city, such thoughts would uncontrollably arise.

But thinking that she had a boyfriend now, while he was in this half-dead state.

He felt insecure and embarrassed, lacking even the courage to see her from the shadows.

He had always thought.

When not in his sight, not by his side, Shu Nian would surely live better, would live under another patch of sunshine.

Living a bright and beautiful life.

After reading those materials, Xie Ru He felt depressed. He suddenly stood up and walked toward the bedroom. He stopped at the doorway, his eyes dark and gloomy, raising his hand to knock on the door: “Nian Nian?”

As soon as he spoke, there was a sudden sound of something falling to the floor inside.

A loud clang, accompanied by the sound of many small objects scattering.

Then, Shu Nian’s voice sounded, filled with urgency and unease: “Wait a moment…”

Because of this commotion, Xie Ru He’s breath stopped, and he instinctively pushed the door open.

Shu Nian was wearing a cotton short-sleeved shirt, her face deathly pale, kneeling beside the bed. On the floor were several medicine boxes and a pill bottle that had rolled away, with dozens of white pills scattered around.

At that moment, she was frantically picking up the pills one by one.

Noticing the door movement, Shu Nian looked up. Seeing Xie Ru He’s face, she seemed extremely guilty, quickly lowering her head again, also stopping her movement of picking things up.

Silent and still, as if accepting torture.

Xie Ru He stood at the doorway for a few seconds, then quickly walked over and carried Shu Nian back to the bed. Her body was stiff, seemingly covered in cold sweat, not making a sound.

He glanced at her, then crouched down, calmly picking up the things on the floor.

“What is this?”

Shu Nian nervously tugged at a loose thread on her clothes: “Medicine…”

Xie Ru He made a sound of acknowledgment, looking at the instructions on the medicine boxes, slowly reading: “Fluoxetine hydrochloride tablets, indications: depression, obsessive-compulsive disorder, bulimia nervosa. Sertraline hydrochloride tablets, used for treating depression…”

He didn’t read further, asking softly: “Do these medicines have side effects?”

Shu Nian didn’t respond, her lips pressed into a line.

Xie Ru He was silent for a while, his voice becoming hoarse and low: “If you feel your current condition requires medication, can we first consult a doctor, listen to their opinion, and then decide, okay?”

“…” Shu Nian shook her head, saying seriously, “I don’t want to go, it’s useless.”

Xie Ru He patiently reasoned with her: “When you’re sick, you need to see a doctor for the illness to get better.”

“It won’t get better.” Shu Nian looked at him, perhaps feeling aggrieved, her eyes immediately reddening, “I used to obediently do as told, properly see doctors, but it’s been over a year and I’m still not better…”

“Maybe it doesn’t get better that quickly.” Xie Ru He said softly, “But if you don’t see a doctor, it will get worse.”

“It can’t be cured, and it costs money.” Shu Nian couldn’t hear his words, sobbing, “I’ve been sick for almost two years, I know how to take medicine, I know how to take it, I won’t take it carelessly…”

Xie Ru He wiped her tears: “It will be cured.”

She stubbornly shook her head.

“I used to think my legs wouldn’t get better either.” Xie Ru He said, “But now they have.”

Hearing this, Shu Nian raised her eyes, and another tear fell. Her voice was nasal, soft, and tender: “I’m not as strong as you.”

He said hoarsely: “You’re stronger than me.”

Shu Nian still shook her head: “I don’t want to go.”

Xie Ru He licked his lips: “Why don’t you want to go?”

“Seeing a psychologist…” Shu Nian lowered her head, seemingly embarrassed, “costs a lot of money. I don’t have money, and I don’t want to ask my mother, I already told her I’m almost better.”

Hearing this, Xie Ru He took his phone out of his pocket and placed it in front of her.

“I have money.”

Shu Nian pushed his phone back, rubbing her eyes hard: “I can’t use your money.”

He was taken aback, and asked again: “Why not?”

“It’s your money.” Shu Nian’s tone was stiff, “I can’t use it.”

Xie Ru He suddenly remembered something, he stood up and sat down beside her. He frowned, his voice lowering: “If you don’t want to see a doctor, you can tell me, but why are you secretly taking medicine?”

The tone sounded a bit harsh.

Shu Nian instinctively glanced at him.

Xie Ru He’s face showed no expression, his dark, deep eyes staring directly at her, carrying a bit of pressure, impossible to discern his current emotions.

Shu Nian dully made a sound of acknowledgment, her tears no longer falling, blankly staring back at him.

Seeing her like this, Xie Ru He’s anger dissipated, and he just sighed: “You need to tell me when something’s wrong.”

Shu Nian lowered her head, playing with her fingers, mumbling: “I was afraid if you knew, you wouldn’t let me take them.”

Xie Ru He nodded: “What else?”

“Afraid I might have an episode.” Perhaps finding it difficult to speak about, Shu Nian’s voice grew quieter, almost inaudible, “It would be very uncomfortable, and just thinking about it makes me anxious, so I want to take medicine to suppress it. And I don’t want you to see me like that.”

Xie Ru He asked patiently: “Like what?”

Hearing this, Shu Nian bit her lip, tears falling again in quick succession, without making a sound.

Recalling she had said similar things many times before, Xie Ru He stroked her head, asking: “Why are you so afraid of me seeing?”

“When I first got sick, when it was very serious.” Shu Nian raised her hand to cover her eyes, her words full of choked sobs, “It was my mother who stayed with me… not only was I suffering, she was suffering too.”

“…”

“Once I tried to commit suicide, and she saw it. Afterward, she didn’t dare leave me alone, and she directly quit her job. During that time, she lost a lot of weight, she couldn’t sleep every day. Because she was afraid I would do something… I later heard my stepfather say, my mother also had to take medicine to sleep…”

Upon hearing the word “suicide,” Xie Ru He’s gaze froze.

“But she’s my mother, so she won’t abandon me.” Shu Nian sobbed, “I’m afraid I’ll make you like that too, and then you won’t be able to take it, and then…”

Xie Ru He’s Adam’s apple moved: “And then what?”

Shu Nian couldn’t continue, crying silently to herself.

Xie Ru He understood what she was trying to express.

Probably that he wouldn’t be able to take it, and then would break up with her.

Probably something like that.

He stared at her, then moved closer to hug her, gently patting her back, very seriously saying: “I won’t.”

She said in a muffled voice: “You will.”

“I won’t.”

“You will.”

Xie Ru He paused, feeling that their conversation was like children’s talk. He found it somewhat amusing, lifting her face, using his fingertips to wipe away her tears: “Why would I?”

Shu Nian didn’t know where her stubbornness came from, only feeling that in her current state, apart from her parents, probably no one else could tolerate her.

She thought for a moment with red eyes, reluctantly coming up with a reason: “I dreamed about it.”

Not expecting this answer, Xie Ru He’s expression clearly showed surprise, and he suddenly laughed. He kissed the corner of her eye, saying very seriously: “Then let me apologize on behalf of that dream version of me.”

“It wasn’t you who said it.” Shu Nian raised her hand to touch the spot he had kissed, still in a bad mood, “You don’t need to apologize, and those words weren’t wrong either.”

Hearing this, Xie Ru He tilted his head and thought: “Then you apologize to me.”

Shu Nian’s eyes widened, not quite understanding: “What?”

“You spread rumors about me in your dream.”

“Huh?”

“Defamed my character.” Xie Ru He raised an eyebrow, his almond eyes deep and bright, deliberately dragging out his words, “Made my girlfriend misunderstand me.”