Zhou Wan abruptly looked up at him.

Jiang Yan’s gaze was calm. He had thought about this all night and day, long exhausting the initial shock he felt when he first saw Guo Xiangling.

Zhou Wan paused, then said softly, “So you know everything.”

“So you knew all along that your mother is with him now.” Jiang Yan’s eyes widened in disbelief. “And yet you and Lu Xixiao still…”

“He doesn’t know,” Zhou Wan interrupted Jiang Yan. “Only I know. I knowingly chose to be with Lu Xixiao despite this.”

“Why?”

Zhou Wan lowered her eyes.

“Why, Zhou Wan?” Jiang Yan frowned deeply. “You’re not this kind of person.”

“What kind of person do you think I am?”

After all this time bearing this secret alone, she finally erupted, “Obedient, well-behaved, without temper? So even though Guo Xiangling betrayed my father, abandoned me, and refused to help my grandmother in her time of need, I’m supposed to just stand by and watch her live her happy life without doing anything?”

At this moment, Jiang Yan felt like he didn’t recognize the Zhou Wan before him. “…You did this deliberately?”

“Yes.”

Zhou Wan gripped the spine of her book tightly, her knuckles turning white, “I just couldn’t stand seeing her happy, so I deliberately got close to Lu Xixiao, wanting to use this to make the Lu family drive her out. This is the kind of person I am, always have been.”

“But you’ve been with Lu Xixiao for some time now, how…” Jiang Yan paused, leaving the rest unsaid.

“Because…” Zhou Wan turned away her gaze and said, “I don’t want to hurt him.”

Because Lu Xixiao liked her more than she had originally thought.

Jiang Yan was stunned, then frowned: “Paper can’t wrap up fire – don’t you understand this principle? How could you possibly keep this from him forever? He’ll find out someday.”

Zhou Wan’s heart felt like it had been weighed down by a massive stone, sinking deeper and deeper, as if falling into an endless darkness.

These days, she had been deceiving herself, convincing herself that there must be a way to keep Lu Xixiao from finding out.

But ultimately, outsiders see more clearly, and Jiang Yan pointed out the obvious in the most straightforward way.

“Jiang Yan.” Zhou Wan looked at the darkening sky outside the window. “Have you told Lu Zhongyue?”

“Of course not.” He frowned: “I may not like Lu Xixiao, and I’m very aware that this situation could benefit me, but Zhou Wan, you’re a very important friend to me.”

“Thank you. Whatever happens next, I deserve it.”

No matter how angry Lu Xixiao gets, no matter what he does to her.

Zhou Wan gathered up her physics papers and stood, saying softly: “Let’s go, it’s time for class.”

*

She hadn’t contacted Lu Xixiao all day, and he hadn’t come to find her either. As the competition training was about to end, Zhou Wan sent Lu Xixiao a message.

[Zhou Wan: Are you still at school?]

[6: No, something came up.]

Zhou Wan’s gaze fell on these few words Lu Xixiao had sent, and her eyes stung with tears.

This is what they mean when they say people are never satisfied.

After training ended, Zhou Wan packed up her schoolbag and left school, calling her grandmother on the way to ask what she wanted to eat, bought it outside, and returned home.

But in the end, Grandmother barely ate anything before putting down her chopsticks.

It had been like this for several days now.

At first, Zhou Wan thought it was just poor appetite, but after so many days, grandmother had barely eaten anything, becoming thin and frail, her complexion getting worse and worse.

“Grandmother, after we finish eating, let’s go to the hospital,” Zhou Wan said.

“Why go to the hospital?”

“You can’t keep not eating like this, it will cause health problems. Let’s go get checked to see what’s wrong.”

With age, hospital visits have become increasingly frequent.

Grandmother didn’t want to trouble Zhou Wan anymore, especially since she was about to go to her competition.

“This is just what happens when you get old,” Grandmother said with a smile. “They won’t find anything wrong in the examination.”

But in the end, she couldn’t refuse Zhou Wan, and they went to the hospital together.

*

In a dark, dim alley, electrical wires tangled overhead.

Lu Xixiao had his foot planted on Luo He’s shoulder, his expression cold and emotionless as he looked down at him from above, an intense murderous aura surrounding him.

Luo He’s shoulder bone was being crushed to the point of breaking, and he writhed on the ground, howling in pain.

Lu Xixiao released him, then grabbed his face and lifted it: “If you dare say another word about Zhou Wan, I won’t let you off.”

Luo He’s mouth was full of blood, his teeth stained red, a horrifying sight. He was truly fearless, refusing to back down even now. He spat out a mouthful of bloody saliva and said in a hoarse voice: “Never thought I’d see the day you’d become such a romantic.”

Lu Xixiao stared at him silently.

Luo He laughed almost maniacally: “What makes her so special that you think so highly of her? Is it because she’s good in bed? Well then, maybe I should try her out next time.”

As soon as the words left his mouth, Lu Xixiao exploded in rage, suddenly lunging forward and raining punch after punch on Luo He’s face.

His eyes were dark with fury, disregarding all consequences. Blood sprayed from Luo He’s face with each hit.

Seeing that this would end in death if it continued, Jiang Fan rushed over and wrapped his arms around Lu Xixiao’s waist, using every ounce of strength he had to finally pull him away.

“Luo He.” Lu Xixiao’s voice was cold even in his fury. “If you dare touch her, I will kill you.”

Earlier at the bar, they had been drinking.

Lu Xixiao hadn’t participated in these kinds of activities for a long time, and Jiang Fan found it strange that he would come, only sensing that his mood was off.

He guessed they might have argued.

As bad luck would have it, Luo He was sitting in the booth next to them.

Several guys were talking crudely, and eventually, the conversation turned to Zhou Wan, saying things that would make anyone who heard them feel disgusted.

Lu Xixiao immediately grabbed a bottle and went over.

Without any warning, he raised the bottle and smashed it over Luo He’s head, then dragged him straight out of the bar.

The chaos finally ended.

Jiang Fan lit a cigarette and handed it to Lu Xixiao: “Where’s Zhou Wan?”

Lu Xixiao gave a cold laugh: “Don’t know.”

“…”

So they did fight.

Fighting with her while still risking his life for her.

Lu Xixiao looked at another guy’s arm where blood was dripping from his fingertips: “What happened?”

The guy cursed and spat: “That sneaky bastard next to Luo He pulled a knife. It’s not serious.”

Lu Xixiao himself had many injuries of various sizes, and though they weren’t bleeding, taking off his clothes would reveal large bruises that would be painful to look at.

He didn’t care about himself, but his friends had been injured because of him.

“Let’s go to the hospital to get it checked,” Lu Xixiao said with the cigarette between his lips as he stood up. “That cut’s not shallow.”

Getting into the taxi, the driver hesitated when he saw their state – clearly thugs who had just been in a fight, with blood stains on their clothes. He wanted to refuse them, but Lu Xixiao took out his wallet and silently pulled out several bills, handing them over.

The driver grimaced: “Fine, get in. Where to?”

“Hospital.”

Lu Xixiao sat in the front passenger seat and rolled down the window. The howling wind messed up his hair, and the blood on his face had dried into a long streak.

His thoughts were somewhat chaotic.

Like a tangled ball of thread that, no matter how he tried to untangle it, only led back to Zhou Wan.

Those things he had once chosen not to think about, not to care about – once exposed and laid bare, they could no longer be ignored.

He stared blankly at the night scenery outside the window, his gaze unfocused.

After a while, feeling extremely irritated, he took out his phone and called Zhou Wan.

She answered quickly: “Lu Xixiao.”

Her voice was soft, but somehow miraculously soothed some of the irritation in his heart.

“Mm.” He lowered his eyes and said flatly: “What are you doing?”

Grandmother had just finished her examination, and while all her indicators were mostly normal, she hadn’t eaten much lately, leaving her body weak. She needed to get a nutrition injection.

Zhou Wan stood at the pharmacy counter. The examination was already done, and not wanting to worry Lu Xixiao needlessly, she smiled and said: “Nothing much. Are you out somewhere?”

Just then, the taxi stopped outside the hospital, and the driver said: “We’re here.”

Lu Xixiao got out and closed the car door: “Mm.”

The surrounding sounds were somewhat chaotic, and Zhou Wan thought he must be out having fun with friends.

“Then enjoy yourself,” Zhou Wan said. “Don’t drink too much.”

Lu Xixiao’s face remained cold as he tugged at the corner of his mouth: “Got it.”

After hanging up, Jiang Fan smiled and patted Lu Xixiao’s shoulder: “What’s up, did you and Zhou Wan fight?”

“No.”

It really couldn’t be called a fight.

With Zhou Wan’s personality, who could even get into a fight with her?

“Then what’s with that attitude?” Jiang Fan raised an eyebrow. “Weren’t things good between you just recently?”

Even if he had grown tired of her, it shouldn’t be like this now.

As they were talking, Lu Xixiao suddenly stopped in his tracks. Jiang Fan looked up in surprise and followed his line of sight, only to see Zhou Wan not far away, having just finished getting her prescription.

Jiang Fan had been standing nearby during that phone call earlier and had heard most of the conversation.

When Lu Xixiao asked what she was doing, she said “Nothing much.”

Their companion was quite tactless – upon seeing Zhou Wan, he eagerly waved his injured, bleeding hands and called out: “Sister-in-law!”

Hearing the voice, Zhou Wan instinctively looked over.

Her steps faltered.

Then she saw the blood stains on Lu Xixiao’s clothes, the bruise across his nose bridge, and the blood marks on the back of his hand.

She frowned and ran over: “What happened to you?”

Lu Xixiao looked at her and said flatly: “Why are you here?”

“Brought grandmother over.” Zhou Wan paused slightly. “Everything’s fine now.”

“Oh.”

Zhou Wan carefully examined his injuries: “Lu Xixiao, did you get into a fight?”

“It was Luo He,” the companion, not sensing the awkward atmosphere, said loudly. “Damn it, he’s got guts but no spine. Next time I’ll fucking kill him!”

Jiang Fan tried to smooth things over: “Earlier at the bar, Ah Xiao heard…”

“Jiang Fan.” Lu Xixiao suddenly cut him off. “You guys go in first.”

After speaking, he grabbed Zhou Wan’s arm and walked outside.

Zhou Wan stumbled as she was pulled along, but her mind and eyes were filled with concern for his injuries. As she stumbled forward, she tried to reach for his hand to get a better look at his wounds.

“Lu Xixiao…”

Zhou Wan’s voice trembled, both worried and angry. “Why did you get into another fight?”

Lu Xixiao’s irritation exploded into rage. He suddenly stopped and turned around, looking down at her, his eyes full of impatience and fury.

“Whether I fight or not is none of your business.” Lu Xixiao sneered. “Zhou Wan, who do you think you are?”

Zhou Wan froze.

Her hand, suspended in mid-air, stayed there for a moment before slowly lowering.

Lu Xixiao regretted those words the instant they left his mouth.

But seeing Zhou Wan’s lowered hand, his face grew cold again, and through gritted teeth, he asked once more: “Tell me, who are you to me?”

“I’m sorry.” Zhou Wan lowered her head. “But please go see a doctor first, okay?”

Lu Xixiao turned his head and gave a cold laugh.

He would have preferred if Zhou Wan got angry at him, hit him, cursed at him – anything.

But after he said such harsh words, she could still apologize to him kindly.

Zhou Wan had never truly considered him her boyfriend.

No temper, no emotions – it was more like she didn’t care about him at all, so there was no need to get angry, no need to waste emotions on him.

They would separate eventually anyway.

She had anticipated and accepted it all long ago.

She wore that purest, most innocent face while doing the most despicable things.

As if it was all just for momentary pleasure, just to enjoy a brief happiness.

Perhaps this was karma for all his past misdeeds, finally catching up to him.

Lu Xixiao closed his eyes briefly and took a deep breath.

“Zhou Wan.”

She kept her head down: “Mm.”

“When I asked what you were doing, why didn’t you tell me you were at the hospital?”

Zhou Wan paused: “Because the examination was already done, and nothing was wrong, so I didn’t want to say anything and make you worry.”

It wasn’t originally a serious matter.

But at this moment, this small thing was infinitely magnified, continually building upon Lu Xixiao’s suspicions.

“Yesterday when I asked what you were thinking about, you said nothing. Fine, if you don’t want to tell me, I won’t ask. Today it’s the same thing – do you even consider me your boyfriend? You won’t tell me anything, you keep everything to yourself, and no one can get in. Zhou Wan, is this how you date someone?”

Zhou Wan had noticed Lu Xixiao’s unhappiness yesterday but hadn’t expected it to ferment to this point.

She looked up at him with reddened eyes.

The young man’s gaze was downcast, his eyes filled with utter disappointment, coldness, and irritation.

For someone like Lu Xixiao, winning hearts came easily.

And for someone who had once been treated gently by him, how could they not feel hurt seeing his current expression?

Her eyes were forced red with blood, the tip of her nose flushed pink, her eyelashes damp.

Lu Xixiao was still irritated, but seeing her like this made his heart soften. His fingers at his side twitched slightly.

Compromising, he thought, forget it, whatever she’s thinking about doesn’t matter, as long as she stays by his side, he couldn’t be bothered to care about anything else.

Just as he was about to bend down to wipe Zhou Wan’s tears, she suddenly lowered her head and said softly: “Lu Xixiao, do you not want to be with me anymore?”

Lu Xixiao paused, his Adam’s apple bobbing.

Zhou Wan didn’t even dare look up at him, afraid of seeing that cold, distant expression again.

She tried hard to keep her voice from trembling: “If you want to break up with me, then we…”

“Zhou Wan.”

Lu Xixiao didn’t let her continue, cutting her off coldly.

But if Zhou Wan had been more careful at that moment, she would have noticed his urgency, his fear that she would say those words, that things would reach a point of no return.

“You…”

He was too angry to continue, holding back his fury as he let out a breath, turning his head to look elsewhere. “Forget it, do whatever you want.”

*

It was half an hour later when Grandmother finished her nutrition drip.

“Wan Wan, are you cold?” Grandmother asked at the hospital entrance.

“Not cold,” Zhou Wan said.

Grandmother grabbed her hand and exclaimed, “Oh my! Your hands are so cold and you say you’re not cold? With exams coming up soon, you can’t catch a cold!”

Grandmother immediately tucked her hand inside her padded jacket, continuously rubbing the back of her hand to warm it up.

Zhou Wan’s dark eyelashes trembled slightly.

A sudden bitterness welled up in her nose, her heart aching sharply. She could only force her eyes wide open, desperately holding back the bitter feeling.

“Grandmother,” Zhou Wan said, “let’s go home.”

Back home, Zhou Wan took a shower and sat at her bedhead.

By the bed still sat the peach butt doll that Lu Xixiao had won for her.

She stared at it for a while.

Remembering Lu Xixiao’s expression from earlier.

After saying “Forget it,” he had turned and left, never looking back.

A tear fell without warning, finally breaking through her forced composure.

She raised her hand to cover her eyes, but still couldn’t stop the tears – hot droplets sliding through her fingers.

Winter was always a heartbreaking season.

She didn’t even dare cry loudly, tightly gritting her teeth, the trembling notes of her voice immediately suppressed as soon as they emerged, leaving only the faint, broken sobs of someone in ultimate pain and sorrow.

That night, Zhou Wan didn’t remember when she fell asleep.

She only remembered that her pillow was wet, her eyes aching with soreness. In her half-dreaming state, she had a dream.

She dreamed of many years ago when she was little when her father passed away, then dreamed of Guo Xiangling dragging her suitcase away from home, of grandmother’s first fainting spell…

For some reason, from childhood to now, she could never hold onto the things she cared about, they always had to leave her.

At the end of that dream, she was in the game arcade. In the dim light, surrounded by the sounds of arcade machines, Lu Xixiao pulled out a pack of cigarettes from the shelf and tossed it on the counter, glancing at her and raising an eyebrow: “What’s your name?”

He was bathed in that unique radiance of youth – vibrant, bold, unrestrained, reckless, proud.

Just like that summer thunderstorm.

Intense, yet brief.

It had soaked her completely, and just when she had finally gotten used to it, the rain stopped, leaving only desolate winds.

Leaving her alone and sick, unable to rise.

In the very end, Lu Xixiao was just like that thunderstorm.

Winter had come, and she still couldn’t keep him.