Hu Qianxi’s condition was getting worse. The night before last, she had another heart attack and was rushed to the emergency room again. At five in the morning, she made another trip back from death’s door.
Due to the sudden decline in heart function and various complications, Hu Qianxi’s episodes were becoming more frequent, her breathing increasingly labored, with constant chest tightness.
Not only that, her abdominal cavity was filled with large amounts of fluid, causing whole-body swelling that required daily drainage of waste fluid.
Sometimes the pain left Hu Qianxi unable to speak a word. She lay on the hospital bed, unable to move her entire body, only able to shed silent tears.
Seeing Hu Qianxi in such pain, Sheng Nanzhou often thought how wonderful it would be if he could take her place.
While Hu Qianxi endured, Sheng Nanzhou accompanied her through it all. Sheng Nanzhou searched everywhere for vasodilation medications for Hu Qianxi, often dropping important matters at hand with just one phone call to find medicine.
Sheng Nanzhou accompanied Hu Qianxi through treatments, searching for doctors far and wide. After a month, Sheng Nanzhou had lost a lot of weight, his frame becoming even more angular, his profile increasingly sharp.
As the New Year approached, ice and snow began to melt, spring quietly climbed onto the branches, and large patches of sunlight poured in. In the hospital room, Sheng Nanzhou carried Hu Qianxi to a chair and pushed her to the window to bask in the sun and feel the breeze.
Hu Qianxi sat there, hands resting on her knees, when she inadvertently saw reflected in the glass window a woman with no color in her face, sickly, her belly swollen from excessive fluid accumulation.
She seemed to have aged ten years.
Hu Qianxi was stunned, then covered her face, tears flowing through the gaps between her fingers as she said softly: “I’ve become so ugly now.”
Sheng Nanzhou crouched in front of her, pulled her hands away, and smiled teasingly: “Not ugly, I think you still look pretty good.”
“Besides, it’s not like I haven’t seen you wet your pants when you were little – that was uglier.” Sheng Nanzhou’s tone was lazy.
“Pfft,” Hu Qianxi burst into laughter through her tears. She looked quietly at Sheng Nanzhou, who had become so thin he was just an angular frame, and suddenly spoke: “Brother Nanzhou, I’m fine, I really can’t hold you back. Don’t worry about me anymore.”
Sheng Nanzhou’s motion of wiping away Hu Qianxi’s tears paused. He lifted his hand to move aside her bangs, revealing a scar on her smooth forehead that had shrunk to the size of a fingernail over time.
The man gently pressed his thumb against the crescent-shaped scar on her forehead and said: “But I was the one who delayed you first. Doesn’t your brother have to take care of you for a lifetime?”
Hu Qianxi’s heart skipped a beat. This sentence was like a stone thrown into a calm lake, creating ripples. Her heart began beating uncontrollably.
Sheng Nanzhou gently touched her head, his dark eyes reflecting her image, his voice very low and serious:
“I want to be responsible for a lifetime, willingly.”
This subtle confession was worth more than a hundred “I like you”s. This sentence seemed to span an entire long cycle of time.
When they played house as children, Hu Qianxi wore an exquisite princess dress, holding a golden sword and presenting it to Sheng Nanzhou, chin raised: “You’ll be this princess’s knight from now on.”
At eleven, Sheng Nanzhou was mischievous and while playing carelessly, accidentally pushed Hu Qianxi to the ground. Her forehead hit a vase on the floor.
The little princess cried heartbreakingly, sobbing: “What if I’m disfigured and no one wants me in the future?”
No matter how Sheng Nanzhou tried to comfort her, it didn’t work. Finally, he patted his chest and promised: “Princess, don’t cry anymore, I’ll marry you.”
All the way through to university, the two bickered and fought, always appearing as the best of frenemies. Now, Sheng Nanzhou had finally revealed the secret he’d kept in his heart.
“But I heard you say in middle school that I was just like a sister to you” – this sentence that had lingered in Hu Qianxi’s heart for years suddenly didn’t seem so important anymore.
Sheng Nanzhou crouched in front of Hu Qianxi, looking at her. Hu Qianxi was crying and laughing at the same time, looking back at him, finally gently raising her hand to touch his temple.
The 3:30 afternoon sun slanted through the window, and their shadows on the floor merged together. Everything was just right.
As the New Year approached, the streets began to be decorated with lanterns, and there were more and more pedestrians on the roads. Occasionally when Xu Sui took the bus home, her gaze would casually drift outside to see more vendors selling bright red Spring Festival couplets. The car flashed by, and the scenery outside blurred hazily in the white mist from her breath.
Mother Xu had been urging Xu Sui to buy tickets home early, but she didn’t want to go home so quickly because Zhou Jingze finally had leave too, and she wanted to spend a few more days with him.
After all, once he returned to duty, Xu Sui might not see him for two months straight.
On Friday, Xu Sui and Zhou Jingze went shopping at the supermarket together, buying a big pile of ingredients. The weather was cold, and they planned to have hot pot at home.
The motion sensor lights lit up in the stairwell. Xu Sui walked arm in arm with Zhou Jingze, her face glowing. When they reached the front door, Xu Sui felt around for her keys but couldn’t find them, so she reached into Zhou Jingze’s coat pocket.
The key went into the lock with a “click” and the door opened. Xu Sui opened the door and was about to speak when she saw who was in front of her, and her smile froze on her face.
Zhou Jingze followed Xu Sui’s gaze and saw a woman in her forties standing before them, neatly dressed with gentle features and watery eyes very similar to Xu Sui’s.
He guessed the woman’s identity and put away his originally casual smile, politely greeting her: “Auntie, hello, I’m Xu Sui’s boyfriend—”
“Mom, how did you get here?” Xu Sui withdrew her hand from the man’s arm and quietly tugged at his sleeve to signal him not to speak yet.
Mother Xu’s attitude wasn’t particularly warm. She smiled at Zhou Jingze once and asked nothing else, then looked at her daughter: “I saw you hadn’t come back, so I wanted to come see you.”
Mother Xu took the supermarket bags from Xu Sui’s hands, glanced at the wall clock, looking apologetic: “Thank you for bringing her home. It’s so late…”
Zhou Jingze had wanted to say something more, but after catching Xu Sui’s eye, he changed his words: “Alright, I’ll leave the things here, then I’ll go first.”
Mother Xu’s dismissal was polite but also blunt and forceful. Zhou Jingze had barely taken one step out when the door closed in front of him.
Inside, only Mother Xu and Xu Sui remained. Xu Sui’s throat felt dry as she tentatively called: “Mom—”
“Yiyi, Mom doesn’t agree to you being together. Break up. Tomorrow morning, go home with Mom for New Year.” Mother Xu turned around and said.
“Mom, I…” Xu Sui tried to say something.
“I made your favorite fennel dumplings. I’ll go fish them out.” Mother Xu smiled and hurriedly walked toward the kitchen.
Xu Sui sighed. This was Mother Xu’s typical tactic – when she had made up her mind or didn’t want to discuss something further, she would avoid it like this. Xu Sui assumed she was just angry and planned to talk properly the next day when her anger subsided.
Xu Sui sat on the sofa and took a sip of water, noticing her phone screen light up. Opening it, she saw a message from the man:
【Call me if anything happens.】
Xu Sui typed a reply: 【It’s nothing.】
She suddenly thought of something and asked: 【You haven’t left yet, have you?】
Zhou Jingze quickly sent a message back that warmed Xu Sui’s heart: 【Just happened to be downstairs smoking two cigarettes, afraid your mom might think being with me makes you disobedient, then hit you.】
【As if, my mom is very gentle and never hits people. Go back quickly, I’ll talk to you tomorrow.】
When they ate dumplings together, Xu Sui specifically observed her mother’s expression. Mother Xu seemed relaxed and even chatted with her about everyday things, saying her aunt’s child was too mischievous.
Xu Sui felt somewhat reassured.
Who knew that the next day, Xu Sui drowsily opened her eyes in bed to see Mother Xu taking out her silver suitcase, folding her clothes and stuffing them inside.
“You’re awake. Pack up, we’ll go back this afternoon.” Mother Xu said while folding clothes.
Xu Sui got up from bed and explained: “Mom, there are still four days until New Year. I still have some work to finish up. I’ll definitely go back the day after tomorrow.”
But Mother Xu acted as if she hadn’t heard, continuing to pack things on her own. Xu Sui called out helplessly, and Mother Xu’s movements paused as she said: “You keep refusing to come home – are you staying here to be with him? Break up. I won’t agree to you being together.”
Xu Sui walked over, reached out to take her own clothes, and said: “Mom, I know what you’re worried about. He’s a pilot who has flown safely for so many years, and his flying skills are excellent. Nothing will happen. I’m also a doctor – doesn’t this profession also have high risks? There are even sudden deaths…”
As she was trying to persuade her, Mother Xu yanked her clothes away and threw them on the bed, her eyes instantly reddening: “Have you forgotten how your father died?”
“Do you want to be called a widow at a young age like me?”
This sentence tore open the half-healed wound again. Xu Sui remained silent for a long time, then said softly: “That was just an accident.”
“Mom, before you told me to study hard so others wouldn’t laugh at us. I was very obedient and studied hard. You told me to be understanding and considerate of adults, so I never dared make you angry and never said no. I still remember that time when the whole class organized a trip, I really wanted to ski once, but you made me stay home to study, saying if I studied one more day than others, I would win,” Xu Sui looked at her, her tone pausing as she struggled to squeeze out words from her throat, “Later I discovered it wasn’t like that. You made me give up drums and games, and I gave them up too. It wasn’t until university, when I met him, that I picked up what I loved again.”
“I really like him very much. I’m very happy with him.”
“This time I want to make my own decision. I will be happy. Don’t you trust me? Since childhood, when have I ever disappointed you?” Xu Sui sniffled, lowering her dark eyelashes, “I just want to be with him.”