Li Shu had thought of many things along the way, yet it was as though she had thought of nothing at all. She had always considered the mind within her to be the aspect of herself most worthy of pride — cool, cold, detached, rarely allowing emotion to cloud her thinking.

Yet now she stood outside the Golden Jade Chamber’s door and for a long moment did not know what to do.

How to tell Shen Xiao about this.

What his reaction would be.

And what choice he would then make.

And what choice she herself would make.

No — what choices were there?

Li Shu gave a bitter smile. Imperial Father had left her no choices at all.

Beyond facilitating this marriage, there was no second path she could walk. If she refused, she would lose all Imperial Father’s favor entirely. The Seventh Prince had not yet fully established himself — his ascension to the throne was still far off. If she were to fall out of Imperial Father’s favor at this juncture, and Shen Xiao were to lose Imperial Father’s trust, then both of them would be finished for the rest of their lives.

That simply could not be. She had struggled so painstakingly to reach her position today; Shen Xiao had struggled so painstakingly to reach his position today. And because these things had been won at such cost, losing them could not be permitted. If they were lost — then how were all those days and nights of striving to be accounted for?

So in truth, both of them had only ever had one choice.

Li Shu clenched her fist and reached out, about to knock on the door — and in that instant, a sudden wavering came over her. She was transported back several years, to the divination slip she had drawn at Qianfu Temple, praying for a good match.

The lowest grade — an ill-fated slip.

She had thought the slip foretold her fate with Cui Jinzhi. In fact, it had been prophesying her own destiny all along: affection was a luxury. If one reached out to long for it, one would not come to a good end. Her mother would die young. Cui Jinzhi would be cold and indifferent toward her. And Shen Xiao… would marry another.

If that is how things are, then let it be so.

Those shadowed, ambiguous feelings of former days. Those stirrings of sentiment that had begun to take root. Those words that had not yet been spoken aloud.

Let them end today. It is not too late.

Li Shu at last made up her mind and reached out her hand — to push open the door of the Golden Jade Chamber. At that very moment, the door was suddenly opened from within.

Shen Xiao had estimated the time it would take Li Shu to come upstairs, and had waited for a long while without seeing her appear. Thinking something might have happened, he could wait no longer and had opened the door from inside himself — to find Li Shu standing there in a daze just outside.

Her face and lips had both gone pale, suffused with the stricken pallor of someone who had been thoroughly frozen.

Shen Xiao’s heart tightened. Seeing how thin her clothing was, instinctively he reached out and took hold of Li Shu’s hand, guiding her inside the Golden Jade Chamber.

Li Shu did not resist.

Shen Xiao frowned and asked: “Why are you dressed so lightly?”

He settled Li Shu onto the daybed, stretched out his arm to close the window, and poured a cup of hot tea.

Hong Luo made to help, but Shen Xiao waved her off with a gesture that brooked no interference. Hong Luo lowered her head and withdrew to stand at the door, thinking to herself that Lord Shen’s regard for the princess was plain to see for anyone who wasn’t blind. She let out a quiet sigh, and as she stepped out, pulled the door closed behind her, leaving them a space in which to speak alone.

Shen Xiao sat across from Li Shu. His thick, well-defined brows furrowed slightly — a sharp and stern face by nature, yet in the way he looked at her at that moment, those two jet-black pupils held room for no one but her. Too intent to be endured.

“What is wrong?”

Something was off with Li Shu — Shen Xiao could see it.

Her expression was still composed on the surface, but it was too still — as though something were quietly brewing beneath. What had happened after she entered the palace today?

Hearing this, Li Shu slowly shook her head. And so Shen Xiao understood: she did not yet want to tell him, or else she did not know how.

So Shen Xiao did not press her. He softened his voice, and slid the teacup a little further toward her. “Have some tea first, and warm yourself.”

The trace of a southern accent in his Mandarin was especially noticeable when his voice was low, carrying with it a quality of particular, lingering warmth.

Yet Li Shu did not take the cup. Instead, she reached out and pushed it away — as though she were rejecting something that emanated warmth.

Once you feel warmth, you feel the cold all the more keenly afterward. If you do not wish to feel cold, do not permit yourself to feel warmth from the very beginning.

“Shen Xiao.”

Li Shu stared at the teacup for a moment, then at last lifted her eyes. The clear depths of her gaze held a kind of extreme calm and concealed pain. “Have you taken a wife?”

Shen Xiao was momentarily puzzled. Had it not been for the strangeness of Li Shu’s expression and tone, he would probably at that moment have misconstrued the question entirely, taking it to mean she was asking to marry him.

Shen Xiao frowned and shook his head. “I have not.”

“Then have you been bound by any betrothal agreement to anyone?”

“None.”

“Then let me speak to you of a marriage prospect.”

Li Shu said this in a voice of absolute indifference, with an expression of absolute calm. Every emotion had settled to the bottom, and she had at last encased herself in a thick suit of armor.

Henceforth, no one would be able to pierce through that armor and touch the soft places at her very core.

Shen Xiao went rigid — for a moment he thought his ears had failed him.

Li Shu continued in that same flat tone: “What do you think of Princess Jincheng?”

“She is fifteen this year, just recently having completed her coming-of-age ceremony, ranked fifteenth among the imperial children. In appearance she is dignified; in temperament she is quiet; her needlework is excellent; and she has read the Four Books for Women quite thoroughly.”

“Her mother holds a low rank and was originally a palace maidservant elevated to the grade of Cainu. Her maternal family has no power whatsoever. You are an official beholden to no faction — a marriage alliance with such a princess would not develop any additional ties of influence within the court, and would only deepen Imperial Father’s trust in you.”

Li Shu at last said all she had to say, and concluded: “So… what do you think of this marriage with Princess Jincheng?”

Li Shu fixed her gaze on Shen Xiao, without blinking — still those clear, transparent eyes. Yet Shen Xiao could plainly feel that her eyes were hollow. She seemed to be looking at him, yet in truth she had taken in nothing at all.

At this moment, she was like a puppet — one carved with a pair of lifelike eyes and every convincing feature of an expression, yet incapable of producing even a trace of feeling.

Shen Xiao’s jet-black eyes looked back at Li Shu. He did not answer her question, but asked instead: “Li Shu, what happened in the palace today?”

But Li Shu was remarkably persistent. “What do you think of Jincheng?”

“What exactly happened in the palace?”

“Jincheng —”

“I am asking you what exactly happened in the palace!”

Shen Xiao suddenly raised his voice, cutting Li Shu off with an abrupt interruption.

His right hand gripped the corner of the small table with force. The blue-green veins rose from beneath the sinew-defined skin of his hand.

Speak to him of a marriage prospect? What in damnation does he need with a marriage prospect!

“Tell me — what happened?”

Shen Xiao’s tone grew very heavy, carrying a latent, pressing force.

People in the court all said that Shen Xiao was Shen the King of Hell — utterly ruthless in handling official matters, meting out punishment where punishment was due, deaf to any pleading.

Yet Li Shu had never once seen his King-of-Hell side. She had always thought he merely wore a stern and cold face as a facade. But at this moment — his voice lowered, his expression frigid — she felt for the first time the genuine, unsparing weight of his presence pressing down on her.

Those two jet-black pupils were like the surface of the sea at midnight — beneath the dense opacity, a sky-swallowing tempest lay concealed.

“Li Shu, do not conceal anything from me. Tell me — what has happened?”

Seeming to sense his own fury, Shen Xiao breathed deeply, pushing his emotions back down.

He should not be this angry. Yet anyone else might propose a match for him — just not Li Shu.

“If you have a difficult situation, tell me, and we will solve it together. All right?”

Shen Xiao at last softened his words, and with an almost coaxing patience addressed her: “Why suddenly speak of finding me a wife? Is it an order from His Majesty? Whatever has happened — tell me all of it. With me here, things will not come to as bad a pass as you fear. We can solve it together.”

“Tell me, all right?”

By the end, Shen Xiao’s voice had taken on an almost beseeching quality.

Do not make every decision on your own without telling me anything, without giving me a say, pronouncing judgment on my fate.

That is not fair to me.

Li Shu slowly raised her head and looked at Shen Xiao. She smiled — a smile that emerged from an expression of extreme coldness, and so carried a touch of cruelty.

“It is useless. There is no solution whatsoever.”

“You are the paragon of men from humble origins. Imperial Father wants you to marry a princess — to set an example for the humble-born across the realm. From the day Imperial Father began relying heavily upon you, a politically arranged marriage was inescapable.”

Shen Xiao fixed his gaze on Li Shu. “But there are so many princesses in the inner palace — why must it be Princess Jincheng?”

Is it not also… you?

Li Shu seemed to have heard the thought in his heart. She again showed that cold and cruel smile. “And so Cui Jinzhi chose this moment to impeach us both.”

“And so Imperial Father has asked me to be the matchmaker between you and Jincheng.”

“If the matchmaking succeeds and you marry Jincheng, everyone is satisfied. If the matchmaking fails and you are unwilling to marry Jincheng, suspicion arises.”

“Shen Xiao, you are an official beholden to no faction — as am I. The Seventh Prince has not yet consolidated his footing. At this moment, aside from Imperial Father, neither of us has anyone to lean upon at court. You know what comes of inviting Imperial Father’s suspicion.”

“I spent so many years clawing my way out of the cold palace. You endured years of study before walking the path you walk today. For the sake of a single marriage, are you willing to abandon everything?”

Watching the dazed expression on Shen Xiao’s face before her, Li Shu reached out and picked up pieces from the weiqi board on the table — black and white — and said: “Since fate is not our own to command, there is no use in struggling.”

Shen Xiao had spent too little time in official service to yet know the helplessness of being a person in this world. Li Shu had already witnessed too much of it, had been used by others too many times herself. She accepted this reality with calm, without a trace of resistance.

“You say nothing, and I will take that as your agreement. Shen Xiao, I will go to the palace right now and tell Imperial Father that you are willing.”

Who would not be willing?

One choice was to marry a princess and rise steadily toward greatness. The other was to refuse the marriage and fall into the mud. Anyone would choose the former — Shen Xiao would not be the exception.

Li Shu set the pieces down on the table, rose, and walked toward the door. She walked quickly, her spine pulled taut — she could not afford to slow down even for a moment. Even one moment’s pause, it seemed, would allow the pain inside to spread through her every limb and bone, until she could no longer move at all.

So be it. From Xiankelai to the Hall of Containing the Prime — no more than half an hour at most. She would ride fast, give herself not the slightest chance to look back, tell Imperial Father that Shen Xiao was willing, and her duty would be done.

And then her heart would hold nothing but political scheming, financial calculation, the burning desire for power. She would never again permit any weakness, any warmth of feeling. Those emotions that Shen Xiao had awakened in her — they would all dissolve entirely with the arrangement of this marriage.

Hereafter, when they met again, he would be the consort of her fifteenth younger sister. He would be her fifteenth brother-in-law.

In a manner resembling flight, Li Shu lowered her head and marched straight toward the door.

Shen Xiao reacted abruptly. He moved in quick strides toward the door, and just as Li Shu reached out to open it, he suddenly seized her hand. With a force that twisted her entire body around, he pulled her against him in a restraining embrace.

“You have not yet asked me whether I am willing to marry Princess Jincheng.”

Shen Xiao leaned down toward her, both eyes fixed on Li Shu. Close — so close that their foreheads nearly touched. His eyes held only Li Shu. His voice was stern and cold, carrying the weight of authority and command: “Ask me — whether I am willing to marry Jincheng.”

Li Shu summoned every ounce of strength within her and turned her head to the side, avoiding Shen Xiao’s eyes. “You are willing.”

“I am not willing!” Shen Xiao cried out.

—